E. J. Dionne, Jr. The Brookings Institute

June 2, 2012
E. J. Dionne, Jr.
The Brookings Institute
1775 Massachusetts Avenue
Washington, DC 20036

RE: “Pond scum”, “level the playing field”, and what is it about Massachusetts that lies get their own zip code – Some comments on the above
Mr. Dionne,
I watched you on Rachel Maddow’s show and one thought immediately leapt to mind: You were an All Star catcher on the high school bullying team. I too went to an all-boys Catholic high school. I too was on the All Star bullying team. The difference is that I was the pitcher.

I don’t know when you picked up the term “pond scum”. I first heard it from Congressman Jack Brooks of Texas. He was a limited partner of mine in an entity called Trinity Associates of which I was the General Partner. [Congressman Fernand St. Germain was also a partner] I had, still have, many Texas roots. The Congressman was the quintessential “good old boy”. Ed Rollins, GOP political consultant, was always in his cross hairs. He would begin the conversation by calling him “pond scum”. It went downhill from there.

You mentioned “level playing field” as if were sacred writ. I was expecting some other usual suspects of modern American Liberal jargon, things like like “slippery slope”, “chilling effect”, and the new favorite “fairness”. It suggests, indeed it screams, a lack of thought. Then again I did mention modern American Liberalism. Res ipso loquitur.

You fear this year’s contest will be as dirty as 1988. We all know that the low point was the racism of George H. W. Bush, as defined by Lee Atwater, about Willie Horton. Alas, the autopsy reveals something else.

We can stipulate, can’t we, that Father Flanagan’s maxim about there being no such thing as a bad boy, that it never took the measure of Willie Horton. Let the record show that the word “boy” has no racial connotation. [There was a rumor, unsubstantiated, of course, which is why it is called a rumor that Father Flanagan was 1/32 Kikuyu. How else could his favorite dish be Masai jowls with a side order of eland and wildebeest sweetbreads?]

Willie Horton is as violent a felon as Massachusetts had ever seen. Rape and murder were his specialties. Apparently Governor Dukakis, AKA Wee Mikey, thought there was no such thing as a violent felon. He gave him a weekend furlough. Having run out of low hanging fruit in Massachusetts he went to Maryland where, and I know you will find this hard to believe, he raped and murdered again. Governor Dukakis, doubtless being fitted for his tank outfit, was too busy to see the families of the Maryland victims.

I did say stipulate, didn’t I? Such is my devotion to the record that I will instantly correct any error called to my attention.

George H.W. Bush, as evil a 1%er as can be imagined, was not the person who brought this story to the attention of the American public. Senator Albert Arnold Gore, Jr, running for the Democratic nomination for President, spent much of the spring shouting it out prior to the New York primary. He later went on to fame as Vice President Alpha Gump. His later careers, that of a “sex starved poodle” and snake oil salesman for which he actually got a Nobel Prize, were not mutually exclusive.

June should be a good month for Princess SummerFallWinterWarren. It is rumored that her great grandfather had a cousin who helped kill Custer. June 25th is the anniversary of Little Big Horn. I have heard she will ride a buffalo up Bunker Hill. She will then kill the blond dyed, in honor of Custer, bison and eat his heart as an offering to Manitou.

If that doesn’t convince those dumb ass voters in Massachusetts nothing will.

It’s safe for you to have lunch today.

Kevin Smith

PS – Speaking of dirty campaigns, you may wish to become familiar with 1800, 1828, and 1876. They make 1988 look like a meeting of Swiss bankers. 2 out of 3 of them were done without electricity.