July 3, 2019 Randy “The Red” Schultz The Sun Sentinel RE: “Fail-Safe” – The ultimate litmus test for modern American Liberals, the vile vipers who befoul our precious environment, as highlighted by you in this morning’s Sun Sentinel.

July 3, 2019

Randy “The Red” Schultz

The Sun Sentinel

RE: “Fail-Safe” – The ultimate litmus test for modern American Liberals, the vile vipers who befoul our precious environment, as highlighted by you in this morning’s Sun Sentinel.

Sinner Schultz, 

C.S. Lewis was right when he described yesterday’s Liberals as “men without chests” whose favorite color is plaid.

It’s what happens when believing in nothing leads you, inexorably and inevitably, to believing in anything.

I know that Logic is a four-letter word to people who believe that no tax is ever high enough and that the following sentence, written by Thomas Jefferson, a bigoted child molester, in his infamous Declaration of Independence – “He has erected a multitude of new offices, and sent hither swarms of officers, to harass our people, and eat out their substance.” – is no longer valid but how does that lead to your following sentence?

“That is especially true in moderate districts….in

Pennsylvania, Michigan and Wisconsin, where a  

shift of 80,000 combined votes would have made

HILLARY CLINTON

PRESIDENT”

The Sun Sentinel

Today

Page 17A

You

It is owed to the ledger to point out that her husband became the worst man ever to be President and that, had she been elected, she would have been the worst person ever to be elected President.

That’s like saying the cunning runts from Thailand would have beaten the mighty chicks from America with a shift of 14 goals.

The sun isn’t even up and you have won today’s coveted

CABEZA DE CA-CA

Award.

Wear it proudly, you churl

You got it the old-fashioned way.

You earned it!

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – Do you thin the Jappos would have won World War 2 if the Enola Gay augered in on Tinian? If the Colts had scored 17 points in the 4^th quarter they would have beaten the Jets, right? Check GOOGLE. They didn’t. If the Rebel fuses had worked at Gettysburg Colin Kaepernick would still be a slave, right? Do you think the Dems should have promised free Nikes? I have been hoarding plastic straws for 2 years. If you need any you need but aks. 

June 28, 2019 To the keepers of the flame,

June 28, 2019

To the keepers of the flame, to the defenders of the revealed truths of the cabal of modern American Liberals known collectively as the Democratic Party, the party of Jackson, McClellan, Calhoun, Jim Crow, Wilson, Bilbo, Garner, Black, Wallace, Hiss, Barkley, Thurmond, Gore, Smathers, Sparkman, Fullbright, Connor, Stennis, Talmadge, Maddox, Eastland, Russell, Ervin – Jeezus Haitch Keerist, Talk about a Murderers’ Row! – Not a fart in a car load. These pezzonovantes had several things in common: 1 – They were all Democrats. 2 – Their public lives were predicated on one simple thing: No little Black boy would ever go to school with a little White girl. Period. 3 – Lynching was not a Federal crime. 4 - Did I say they were all Democrats? I did? That’s OK ‘cuz I can’t say it enough, can I?

You have a problem in Broward County.

Would you believe there is a dagger daily doing its dastardly deviltry here in our fair land?

Sitting on a North/South axis is Dixie Highway. Further, it goes through a city with the unholy name of Plantation. The high school, Plantation High School, nicknamed, and I am not making this up, “The Colonels”, insults, demeans, and debases its thousands of Black students, doubtless leading to post-graduate PTSD. 

“Old times there are not forgotten” is a constant slap in the face to many of the Black boys, children of single Moms, often in need of a good Ritalin program, those born to be “unlucky in life’s lottery”, toes up on the edge of a feral ferocity unknown to guilty White folk, so much so that we can’t “Look Away, Look Away”. If we do so, we deserve “the fire next time”.

We must act now, while there is still, maybe, time to atone for our sins.

By the by, when we enact proper reparations for slavery – None for you Obama, your father’s family was on the “good” side of the slave business, remember? – shouldn’t Brazil double our amount? After all, they imported twice as many “guest workers” as we did, remember? Also, I had an uncle who died at Gettysburg trying to free the slaves. Shouldn’t I get a fungible, carry-forward tax credit from July 2, 1863?

I was going to send a copy of this to NYC Mayor deBlasio but he’s too busy preparing to be posthumously buggered by Che Guevara, the still dead community activist from Havana. Instead, I am sending it to you, the doyennes and leaders of the pack known as modern American Liberals. They are people who believe there is no such thing as a bad boy, or girl, particularly if either or both are in need of a trans-gendered abortion and could I please see the DNA on the discarded group of cells.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

June 23, 2019 Mary Ellen Klas The Miami Herald meklas@miamiherald.com RE: Inches away from a clean getaway

June 23, 2019

Mary Ellen Klas

The Miami Herald

meklas@miamiherald.com

RE: Inches away from a clean getaway and then your last sentence went off like a Bangalore torpedo. Welcome to the upside-down world – that’s a euphemism for head up your ass world - of Climate Change, a world where nobody seems to mind that clothes are verboten. As reported by you in your excellent Page 1 story in today’s Miami Herald.

Ms. Klas,

Icarus – You remember him, don’t you? – decided “to go where no man had ever gone before.”

It didn’t end well.

One thing we can learn from the despised DWEMs – DWEMS? Send a SASE – is that if gravity doesn’t get you, hubris will. 

Ptolemy and Fred Hoyle shared one big turd in the punch bowl in common. They both laid claim to the one thing that is anathema to scientists. They both were the spear points of “settled science”. One last for a millennium and a half; The other for not quite 15 years. A Polish monk and a pain in the ass Eye-Tie unsettled the former while a supposedly malfunctioning listening device in an AT&T lar in New Jersey undid the latter.

Either way, that which was “settled” became “settled” when burrs under the saddle, aka “facts”, began to irritate the horse.

It happens all the time.

It is also known as the scientific method.

[Einstein used his 1900 internet repeatedly. Every time he posited a new theory, he sent copies of it to the small number of members of his universe. He said, “I only have to be proved wrong once.” That way he could get on to something new, and, hopefully, correct.

We are constantly nestled within the envelope of the Yellowstone Explosion. And, if the time line is correct, when it goes kaboom, life as we know it on this planet ceases.

Did Trump cause this?

Will the assembled morons, ohmadahns all, in a way that only modern American Liberals can be, propose a new tax and increased regulations in their upcoming debates that will undo this? Of course, they will. They have no choice. If you begin with the joint premises that no tax is ever high enough and really smart people are really smarter than the “deplorables” they must guide and instruct they must share and impose their “fatal conceit” with the great unwashed.

I have a small favor to ask of you.

I need media support for a “Go Fund Me” page.

I want to make Lysenko the patron saint of the 2020 Democratic Party. And I want to by-pass the Establishment Clause and make Ned Lud the go-to guy for divine intervention in the battle for Climate Change.

Kevin Smith

WARRKIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – Are modern American Liberals incapable of separating causation and correlation? Do they know that they are 2 different things? Can I use Solyndra solar panels to power my unicorn ranch cum rainbow stew hydroponic vineyard? Why not issue indulgences to the inventor of fartless cows? I have my 1968 copy of “The Population Bomb” by Paul Ehrlich, Ph.D. in my hand. That was the book that said we were all going to die by the year 2000. We would either starve or freeze or both. He was/is so smart that he said it was irreversible and, further, the Roman Catholic Church was speeding it up. Congresswoman AO-C, a shit for brains Jew hater, has picked up the cudgels and given us 12 years to square our accounts with the great Gaia or its 23 skidoo, like forever and ever. The facts would support, strongly support, the interpretation that the inmates are running the asylum. 

June 16, 2019 Perhaps not quite on the league of “in the end is my beginning” but let’s start at the end.

June 16, 2019

Perhaps not quite on the league of “in the end is my beginning” but let’s start at the end.

A part-time Mississippi Postmaster gave a speech in 1950 that contained a life-affirming exhortation, one that if he were to give it today, would earn him venomous, vituperative obloquy.

“MAN WILL NOT ONLY ENDURE: HE WILL PREVAIL.”

We fast forward to this morning’s Miami Herald travel section. It’s as good a place as any to launch a shit-for-brains polemic cum Philippic about, you guessed it, GLOBALCOOLINGGLOBAL WARMINGCLIMATECHNAGECLIMATEDESTRUCTION.

“THE AVERAGE AMERICAN CAUSES THROUGH HIS/HER

GREENHOUSE GAS EMISSIONS SUFFERING AND/OR 

DEATHS OF TWO FUTURE PEOPLE.”

THE MIAMI HERALD

TODAY 

PAGE 12M

Before I switch to the last minute heroics that saved the piping plover, a bird closely associated with the Jersey shore – That’s New, not Isle of or specific bovine – a bird I grew up admiring and spent numerous summers trying to trap, let me add that one solution to the vexing problem of the deaths of future lads and lasses because of my narcissistic practices would be mandatory, unlimited abortion. That’s the only guaranteed way to spare future generations from being indiscriminately murdered.

Back to the friggin’ bird

A series of concerts at a Federal Sea preserve has been canceled because a gaggle of pregnant piping plovers has been found to be nesting there. 

No big deal ‘cuz the music was all geared to exercisers of White Privilege. Guys like Mozart, Frank Sinatra, Hank Williams, Rogers & Hart, and to honor our President, “Zippeedoodah”, from the long outlawed “Song of the South”, with porch Negroes doing backup and harmony.

Andy Newman wrote the article for the New York Times, a paper partly owned by famed Mexican lardon, El Frito Bandido, a paper that favored slavery, a paper that called Lincoln a “baboon”, a paper that turned a blind eye to the KuKluxKlan, a paper that ignored the deaths of either side of 8,000,000 Kulaks, with Kulaks being short hand for Jews – Jeepers! That’s some DNA, ain’t it?

Stop the presses!

Good news from Hong Kong and China.

The Chinks have announced that they will no longer

snatch people off the streets of Hong Kong and try

them – How do you say “Star Chamber” in Mandarin” – 

in Sumdumfuk province.

Florida has outlawed Sanctuary Cities. That means that 

Calhoun’s Theory of Nullification, officially outlawed at

Appomattox in 1865, is still verboten.

Start the presses!

There is a picture of Venice in the article with the attached statement. It says “Rising waters are particularly acute in place like Venice”. 2 things leap to mind:

#1 – I have memories of a huge photo spread of Venice in Life magazine in the late ‘50s. It warned us that Venice didn’t have long to live. The “Missile Gap” was upon us which Kennedy said he would fix. The United States would defend Quemoy and Matsu and tax cuts would get the county “moving again” and into the New Frontier. And Venice would sink. So there.

#2 – Around the same time, Bing Crosby was warning us of the demise of the Atlantic salmon. I am not sure but it was a short-timer. Tell that to Whole Foods.

#1A – I swear to God that the picture has a palm tree in it. I stayed in the Danielli in Venice. It was the apex of sybarism. There wasn’t a palm tree in sight.

Scribe Newman, who makes Seinfeld’s nemesis of the same name seem like a stand-up guy, is trying to justify a family trip to France flying in a jet.

He says he will “buy enough offsets to capture the annual methane emanations of a dozen cows”. He has hit the sacred gong of the Blessed Trinity of modern American Liberals in one sentence: Horse’s Ass, Pompous Fart, and Smarmy Bastard. And to think we outlawed flogging! 

I am starting a Go Fund me page for a vasectomy by commercial-sized Cuisinart for poltroon Newman. If he has children, I hope they are adopted. 

His line must end.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

June 19, 2019 “Curly” Biden [D-DE] is a horse’s ass of truly epic proportions.

June 19, 2019

“Curly” Biden [D-DE] is a horse’s ass of truly epic proportions. Biblical, Homeric, epic, Guinness Book-sized, Brobdanaglian, all are acceptable. Lest there be any confusion, he is named “Curly” in honor of the smartest Stooge.

Last week he announced that upon his inauguration, he would outlaw and then cure cancer. [I have a dog in that fight. Yesterday, I had my 12^th Moh’s surgery for the removal of squamous cell carcinomas. I have had 4 melanomas removed and, on October 21, 2014 I was operated on for breast cancer. I am getting “long in the tooth”. If you can cure it, please do so. What if you lose? Where the Hell will that leave me, you poltroon? I just heard the results of my CAT-Scan on Monday. I have an “anomaly” on my lung that will require further testing. If you are on to something, send it to me overnight collect. FEDEX, not USPS, OK?]

This week, so far, he announced how much he liked working with Senator James Eastland [D-MS] “We got things done,” he said, as if no one was listening. Mussolini’s trains ran on time, didn’t they? Daley [D-IL] got the snow shoveled before he put the fix in on the election of 1960. That was the one the got the DC Vietnam Wall started, right? Yeah, that wall, not the one to be built in Texas.

Failure to mention a material fact is, under Federal Law, a crime.

The “thing” about Senator Eastland, a man known for rubbing the heads of compliant Nigrahs for good luck, was that his entire public life was predicated on and dedicated to one simple premise: No little Black boy would ever go to school with any little White girl. He was an early proponent of Calhoun’s Theory of Nullification, the theory that is the principal principle of Sanctuary Cities. Look it up POO – POO? Perpetually Outraged and Offended, you dolts.

Curly never mentioned that.

This morning, in a successful attempt to top himself in daily public inanities, he said, “Trump inherited a growing economy from Obama/Biden. He is squandering it.”

#1 - Trump inherited an economy that was being strangled, python-like, by regulatory dry heaves.

#2 – Like it or not, and if you listen to the ohmadauns running for the Democratic nomination for President, they like it about as much as Dracula would like a head first entry into a hot tub filled with holy water, Trump released the “animal spirits”, the ones made famous by the great Lord Keynes, modern American Liberals’ favorite economist. It is indeed fitting and proper to note that he was a good friend of Frederick Hayek and a death-bed convert to his school of economic thought.

#3 – Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, Broward County’s favorite modern American Liberal brownshirt – She sent the coppers to my house over some First Amendment things, things like me expressing my opinion – used to go hoarse every June in the Obama/Biden era proclaiming and promising, like Beckett, that this year was finally, really the year of the “Summer of Recovery”. And like Godot, it never showed up. Watch out for the wake, class, This year it’s here. In spades. 

#4 = One of Smith’s great economic commandments is that rich people hire poor people to stay rich and get richer. Poor people work for rich people because they like to eat and maybe they can get rich.

#5 – Puritans, America’s first modern American Liberals, hated unsupervised group activity because the thought that someone, somewhere, might be having a good time drove them bonkers. Today’s version of tight-assed spoil sports, all of whom seem to be running for the Democratic nomination for President, think that if someone is making money it is because someone, disparately women and/or minorities, is not and, furthermore, polar bears are drowning. These are people who can’t wait for Son of Solyndra, Cash for Clunkers 2, and oodles of “shovel-ready jobs”, just like the last time. “The triumph of hope over experience” holds no meaning for them. 

#6 - “Such stupidity, sir, is not to be found in nature.”

#7 – Except when it is. 

#8 – “Curly” Biden couldn’t pour piss out of a boot. All of his shoes have notes attached to them, “Toes in first”. He is dumber than a box of hammers.

#9 – And he is still known to some of his classmates as “Cheesedick”

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

June 15, 2019 Perhaps the bottom, the nadir, of the nexus of politics and culture...

June 15, 2019

Perhaps the bottom, the nadir, of the nexus of politics and culture, having been reached, and with the Trousered Apes no longer in the ascendancy, society, an amorphous term embracing the good, the bad, and the ugly, has begun the difficult task of rebuilding itself.

News has reached us of an Ohio jury, doubtless “deplorable’, awarding Gibson’s, a 5^th generation deli and bakery, the astonishing sum of $22,000,000 in punitive damages against Oberlin College

Oberlin College, aka Avernus, is the HQ of “Yes, I Can Piss on your Back and Tell you it’s Rain” nest of modern American Liberal vipers who suffer from “Non-Malodorous Fecal Matter Syndrome:, For the unread readers among you, that means you believe, sincerely believe that your shit doesn’t stink. Further, it means that since they alone possess the truth, they alone can judge and punish. [If you think there is a strong smell of National Socialism there, you’re right.]

We can stipulate to the following:

#1 – A Black Oberlin student – the story, alas, would make no sense if White qualified Oberlin student – tried to use a fake ID to buy some “Dutch courage”. When she was refused, she tried to shoplift it.

#2 – When she was confronted, she assaulted the shop keeper.

#3 – She was arrested.

#4 - Within a day, and egged on by the White Dean and feral, foul-mouthed filthy little guttersnipes, the incident took on Duke la crosse rape and UVA fraternity rape status.

#5 – The “alleged” perpetrator, seeing irrefutable evidence, took a plea and became the official “perpetrator”.

#6 – Oberlin continued its slanderous campaign against Gibson’s

#7 – Gibson’s sued Oberlin and won $11,000,000 in compensatory damages to which the jury added $22,000,000, the Ohio % limit, in punitive damages.

Of course, the defendants will appeal. It’s what modern American Liberal pukes do. Having been judicially “woodshedded”, their language will be a bit more circumspect. What will not change will be the contempt they have for those who are not card carrying, fire breathing Social Justice Warriors where any excess, however egregious, will be excused if the goal is a perfect society.

And, since they believe in nothing, they will believe in anything. That’s why my reference to National Socialism was not off-handed.

It is a day worthy of a te deum. The good guys told the bad guys to fuck off and got paid for so doing.

I watched the Governor of California announce that if people want to come to his state, drop their trousers, and shit in the streets, well, by crikey, that’s OK with him. Further, he will tax rich White folk to help promiscuous street shitters – possibly an Olympic event in 2028 – come to grips with the barbaric Trump Administration, rat bastards all, who think Sanctuary City Street Shitting, on balance, ain’t such a good idea.

The jurors In Ohio, having struck a blow for truth, justice, and the American Way, having given the “Permanent Things” a much need booster shot, have greatly advanced the Western Canon.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

une 12, 2019 Ditka’s Bears did to the Patriots what the grinder would have done to baloney.

June 12, 2019

Ditka’s Bears did to the Patriots what the grinder would have done to baloney. Ditto the 49ers and the Broncos and the Cowboys and the Bills. The Yankees and the Cubs and the Giants and the Indians leap to mind. Don’t forget Seton Hall/Duke in 1989.

Before he got to South Bend, Lou Holtz coached William & Mary against Bobby Bowden’s NC State Wolfpack. He was beaten like a rented mule. At mid-field, after the game, Bowden refused to accept any blame for running up the score. “Don’t get mad at me because your team wasn’t ready.”

The 1992 Dream Team, and talk about Sherman going through Georgia, was ravaging Angola by more than 70 points when Charles Barkley, now a noted Life Coach, elbowed Obama Fagowi Olatunji with a shot that resulted in a pneumonectomy. He said, after the game, that he thought he was carrying a spear. [Imagine what the Word Police would have done if Larry Byrd, John Stockton, Christian Laettner, or Chris Mullin had said that. Would it be wretched excess if I were to say that they were/are/will be White?]

Back in my other life, when I flew the Concorde and bought my wife an E-Type Jaguar for Mother’s Day, I produced a series of video tapes on Coach Bob Hurley, Sr. He coached basketball at Saint Anthony High School in Jersey City, hard by the Holland Tunnel, to 27 state titles, 12 Tournament of Champion titles, 6 undefeated seasons, and 4 national championships. He is in the Basketball Hall of Fame. Along with Adolph Rupp, John Wooden, and Red Auerbach.

1989, 32 and 0, average winning margin of 27 points, never once ever behind, not even 1 to 0, was the year we shot it. I gave him a plaque that said 32 and 0 – “It ain’t bragging if you can do it.” He won more than 1100 games, more than 90%, and they were all away games because he never had a home court.

The only time he switched from man to man to a zone was when he was coaching against the best man at his wedding. He knew that when he put his last 3 players in, they would play like vampires in front of a blood bank.

The Romans “ran up the score” when they salted the earth around Carthage in 146 BC. When was the last time you heard about Hannibal?

Spruance didn’t have to get the 4^th Jap carrier on June 4, 1942 to have won an astonishing victory, certainly the greatest naval victory in the 20^th century. He did. Move over Trafalgar and Salamis.

Desert Storm was over 2 days after it started. It ended 3 days later.

Which brings us to the USA soccer chicks in the World Cup.

13 to 0 is a score usually associated with the Israeli Air Force and the Syrian Air Force. !3 to 0, and the game wasn’t as close as the score would suggest, was the result of yesterday’s match between the USA and Thailand. I guess there is no mercy rule like in American High School football. Sounds like a wretched excess of White Privilege on roids except goal differential is a tie breaker and as the Imperial Japanese Navy found out at Midway, “Ain’t a horse can’t be ridden or a rider can’t be throwed

Unless there is a 4-corner offense in soccer there was very little that could be done. If you don’t play hard you insult the other team more than by scoring. And, truth be known, I’d rather be the pitcher than the catcher.

Didn’t the government fall when Germany laid a Texas-sized ass whupping on Brazil in the last guys only World Cup?

Plus, there’s this.

“Breathes there a man with soul so dead who

 never to himself has said

This is my own, my native land.

Would it be considered “deplorable” to sing a few choruses of “Over There”?

You go, Girls!

A fuse has been lighted in Hong Kong. It could lead to a God-awful bang. 

Except for those “Libtards” running around in Iowa, does anyone, anywhere give even the smallest brown squirt shit about Global Warming? To be precise, GlobalCoolingGlobalWarmingClimateChangeClimateDestruction as it has morphed from when Professor Paul Ehrlich, PhD, a very smart man who was on the Johnny Carson Show telling us in 1968 that we were all going to be dead by the year 2000, either from freezing or starving or both. And since Trump wasn’t around to blame, he made the Catholic Church the main culprit. I read where in 2008 and 2011 the rise in the water level in Lake Michigan was blamed on Global Warming. Now the drop in the water level in 2018 is blamed, can you believe this, on Global Warming. I know that Global Warming ended the last Ice Age and killed the mastodons who were that period’s drowning polar bears. What difference does it make? According to the Boob McNutte Congresswoman from Queens we’re all out of here in 12 years. Is it time to open the last ’47 Cheval Blanc?

When Karol Wojtyla was elected Pope in 1979 and the white smoke appeared, y daughter, now Courtenay Hanson, now the mother of my three Texas ladies – Caitlin, Caroline, and Julia – called her Mom’s grandmother and said, “Nanny, we have a Polish Pope”. Although she was always her Nanny’s Polish Angel, she became her Polish Angel.

I am as Irish as it is possible to be. Both sides, Galway and Cork.

 My wife, Amy, was Lithuanian, Polish, German, and English, with definite blood connections to an English King and possible blood connections to a Polish/Lithuanian King. The English King, Charles the First, is most remembered for getting his head cut off by a Presbyterian. The Polish/Lithuanian King, Jan Sobieski, is most remembered for saving Western Civilization from radical Islamic terrorists at Vienna in 1683.

My son, Sean, proudly wore his Solidarity button when he was at Seton Hall Prep. Actually, the button read Solidarnocz. No sense being a half-assed ethnic booster., was there?

This morning, the President of Poland was at the White House where he and il magnifico announced the purchase of 24 F-35s by Poland for its air force. Terms were simple: All cash. Let’s not misunderstand this. An airplane doesn’t know which direction to where it is flying. Trust me; These planes will only be flying East on their outward leg. Look at a map

The President of Poland, in the Oval Office, buying 2 dozen of the most advanced military planes in the world.  And then, going out on the lawn and watching one of his new planes doing a barrel roll over the Washington Monument. Hot damn. Plus, he is naming a base after Trump. Fort Trump. Nanny, long gone, would have loved to have gotten that call from her Polish angel.

The first thing Pope JP2 said from the balcony in the Vatican was “Non timere”. And that was only 40 years ago.

It’s been 25 years but is O.J. still looking for the real killers?

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

June 9, 2019 Nancy Ancrum – Editorial Page Editor The Miami Herald

June 9, 2019

Nancy Ancrum – Editorial Page Editor

The Miami Herald

RE:

Ms. Ancrum,

I like to check the Irish sports section – the obituary section for the uninitiated – of the Star Ledger, New Jersey’s paper of record, sort of. You can take the guy out of Jersey but you can’t take Jersey out of the guy.

Among the more interesting stories from up North was the one that said it was “borderline criminal” that there weren’t more chicks headlining down the shore this summer. [2 quick digressions: #1 – Of course they didn’t say “chicks”. If they did, they would have called for the Word Police to flog them a la Henry the Second after the Becket “misunderstanding”. #2 – People from Jersey never ever go to the beach. They go “down the shore”. Period.] 

I’ll say this for modern American liberal media pundits:

They never let you down

“Borderline criminal?” I am sure that from the undiscovered country Frank Sinatra is wringing his hands that he didn’t have to sit down to pee. Ditto for Frankie Valli, John Bon Jovi, and Bruce Springsteen. Let me add Jerome Hines to that list.

Then I got to today’s Herald.

I read the Page 1 story on housing with interest and amusement. It was well written and contained, of course, several screeching dog whistles, particularly for fans of History. Logic, and folks with practical hands-on experience in the housing business. I made a few notes predicated on one observation: “The upturned neck awaits the ax.”

I put my pen back in its scabbard when I read your editorial.

“The Outrage of being Priced out of Paradise”

The title alone suggests that there is a small band of willful men, malefactors of great wealth, all of whom are filthy rich, most of whom are White and support Trump who have successfully colluded – “colluded?” You betcha – to keep poor people, women of color, single moms with children in need of a good Ritalin program or can I just say “people who are unlucky in life’s lottery” that there is an underserved constituency of hind tit suckers in need of a Bernie or a Kamala or Mayor Bootygoo or – Damn it, AOC is too  young – to raise the flag of revolution.

You say in your editorial that “It is a crying shame.” You had me at a stage of lachrymosity approaching, if unchecked, terminal enuresis.

You snapped me out of it by suggesting, without a hint of humor or wit, that “New York-style rent control legislation” might be in order. I did say that modern American Liberals never let you down.  and

Regardless of the problem, the rubric of the solution is always the same. Somebody from the government, usually bright, always well-intended, will decide what is fair, what is good, and what is right. Except when they don’t. Even when SNAFU approaches FUBAR, as long as their intentions are good, they keep digging. There’s as pony somewhere in the pile of horse shit.

The evidence of your own eyes demands that since it has never worked it will never work. Anticipating that this time it will be different and this time it will work is specious and asinine. Modern American Liberals, always substituting feelings for ideas know that expectations, forgive me, trump results. 

Rent controls lead to Pruitt-Igoe, Curries Woods, slums, $15,000 a month apartments and $5,000,000 starter condos  Look it up.

You end, yet again by trumpeting “The triumph of hope over experience.”

“Hopefully, the Herald investigation will awaken our 

leaders to address this outrage once and for all.”

And that will happen as soon as my brother the hunchback straightens up.

Here’s a plan. Speed up Global Warming. Speed up rising sea levels. Nothing like having Flipper doing back flips 10 miles inland to bring down rents.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – I believe Charles Murray covers this in “Losing Ground”

June 8, 2019 “Sometimes he believed in fantasies such as that the US really had much larger oil reserves than the Middle East. Heroes Paul Johnson

June 8, 2019

“Sometimes he believed in fantasies such as that the US

really had much larger oil reserves than the Middle East.
Heroes

Paul Johnson

He was talking about Ronald Reagan. Johnson, one of the great masters of political prose of the last 50 years, was tactically right when he wrote that. Reagan was strategically right when he said it.

One of my more memorable dialogues with United States Tax Court Judge Carleton Powell – 7 years on trial had to give some pleasurable dialogues – was when I explained to him the difference between reserves in place and recoverable reserves. Reserves in place are like the Maltese Falcon. “It’s the stuff that dreams are made of.”

The tight-lipped, tight-assed New England bankers who ran the whaling business in the late 1850s decided it was time to rake in the big bucks. If you wanted to read at night you had to deal with them. Candles were prohibitively expensive. Plus, there was the risk of considerable collateral damage. Creating the template that OPEC used so well 115 years later, the dudes who less than 2 centuries before were hanging witches – I may be a bit harsh on them. When was the last time you saw witches in Massachusetts? SOBs, si. Witches, no. As bill Bellicheck says, “Do your job.” – said I have the ball and the court. $2 a barrel is now $6. If you don’t like it play your harmonica by the fire place. 3 years later there was no more whale oil business. Scrimshaw tchotchkes rose in price because there was no more scrimshaw.  Whales love it until the Japanese developed a taste for Humpback sushi

Injuns in Pennsylvania long used that smelly black mung oozing out of the ground as the first truly organic homeopathic cure palliative for neuralgia and lumbago. Colonel Drake, a man with a solution in search of a problem, with the solution being that a free man in a free society, a man who is free to fail, “creatively destroyed” the “Let’s harpoon Babar” so much so that the nit-wit Congresswoman form the Bronx tells us we have 12 years to go before the world ends. 

Among the basic rules of economics, rules that Bernie the Bombastic Bolshie and Mayor Pete Bootygoo, the patron saint of Catamites everywhere, inter alia, cannot repeal is the one that says, “If eggs go to $5 a dozen, the rooster lays.”

I fracked my first well in 1974 in Duval County, Texas. That was where LBJ, aided and abetted by his shyster pal Abe Fortas began the journey in 1948 that ended at the Vietnam Wall in DC.

Fracking doesn’t add to reserves in place. It sure as Hell adds to recoverable reserves. Fracking started in 1950. MRIs were around in 1945. Revlamid is the wonder drug for myeloma. When it was known as Thalidomide it was the spawn of the Devil. 

The people who bought Barnes & Noble will use a novel business plan. More autonomy for local managers plus a return to the Mom & Pop atmosphere that Amazon drove out of business. Nothing like a guy backing his plan with his own black chips. No Solyndras here. 

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – I’ve reading books by and about Churchill for at least 65 years. Paul Johnson’s “Churchill’ Is the best first book ever written about him. Plus, it reads superbly well. Speaking of Churchill, I read “The River War” last weekend. No surprises. Gordon is avenged with an emphatic PAID put on an open account. Parts of it reminded me of The Iliad.

“The Death of Stalin” and “Charley Wilson’s War” are two perfect entries for your own film festival.

 

June 8, 2019 Before his classmates at Auchmere Academy...

June 8, 2019

Before his classmates at Auchmere Academy, a bastion of White male elitist Roman Catholic Supremacy, for which his father must be commended for footing the bill for all of the Biden boys, his classmates, fellow altar boys, and mite box fillers at Immaculate Heart, also in Wilmington, Delaware knew that his favorite color was plaid. 

As Saint Augustine said while he was making the difficult commute from the City of Man to the City of God, “Love God and do what you will.”

All modern American Liberal Roman Catholic politicians want to have their cake and eat it and, having eaten their cake, want to have it. That is a gross insult to Logic. 

Cuomo pere et fils have said that while they are personally opposed to abortion, they have no choice but to uphold it because it is the law. 

I asked both of them if they would have upheld the law as defined in the Dred Scott decision. I asked them both, some 30 years apart if, having captured a fugitive slave in New York, they would have put his felonious Black ass on the midnight train to Georgia. Neither has ever answered.

The parallel universes of bifurcated Logic and labyrinthine tautologies that mALs of all stripes occupy enables them to pick and choose which law to obey and which conscience to follow. Sanctuary cities? No 4^th trimester abortion? Si. This eclectic indignation means that they must have a chiropractor on stand-by duty. They become, as C. S. Lewis said, “Men without chests.”

Obama, the calmer of seas and the cooler of the planet, said of Curly Joe, “Sometimes he gets out ahead of his skis.”

Osama bin Laden said, “Here I stand.” Thomas More, John Proctor, Gandhi, and Martin Luther King broke the law and willingly accepted the consequences.

Lillian Hellman, and please God that she still be dead, said, she “would not cut her conscience to fit this year’s fashion.” She wound up shilling for a fur coat company.

Curly is being fitted for a basic black dress with a pearl choker. It will double as a shroud. His own kind, Social Justice Warriors all, will soon tear him limb from limb. 

As the condemned Thomas More said to his accuser, “And you sold your soul for Wales?” Say goodbye Joe. Your time is almost up.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

June 6, 2019

Congressman Paul Tonko

61 Church Street #309

Amsterdam, NY 12010

RE: What a dumb thing to say. Some comments on your verbal incontinence about President Trump and climate change.

Congressman Tonko,

Perhaps not quite as gushing as Keats when “a new planet swims into his ken” but your comment about our beloved President and “borderline criminal activity” reveals several things.

#1 – As a modern American Liberal, a condition that proclaims a deep dumbness and stupidity, “not usually found in nature”, one that bespeaks “the triumph of hope over experience”, you are simply living up to your breed.

#2 – Pop Quiz – What ended the last Ice Age? Answer below.

#3 – Ptolemy’s view of the universe was “settled science” for 15 centuries. Would you have stood with him?

#4 – Ned Lud? Trifim Lysenko? Thank God for Google, you boob.

#5 –“Borderline criminal activity” – Is that like almost pregnant or borderline malignant?

#6 – If we only have 12 years to go perhaps you should advise your constituents to get 15 year, interest only [with a 30 year schedule] mortgages.

#7 – You are dumber than a box of hammers.

#8 – If it’s not too late I suggest a radical vasectomy, one with chain saws and rabid honey badgers.

Kevin Smith

PS – Answer to #2 is Global Warming. Look it up.

June 5, 2019 Rosemary O’Hara – Editorial Page Editor The Sun Sentinel RE: “Déjà vu all over again” – A paragraph worthy of lapidary inscription.

June 5, 2019

Rosemary O’Hara – Editorial Page Editor

The Sun Sentinel

RE: “Déjà vu all over again” – A paragraph worthy of lapidary inscription.

Ms. O,

In its entirety.

“We’re heading into summer and in South Florida we can 

already feel the temperature changing. Look, we can all 

feel the heat, and top scientists predict it will get worse.”

The Sun Sentinel

Today 

Page 10A

I guess it didn’t get hot until Trump, that rat bastard, pulled us out of the Paris Climate Accord. When it seemed like Wide-Bottomed Hillary who screwed Bernie would win I was shrouded in cashmere and goose down. Or maybe not.

[A brief digression, please. The “top scientists” would have been members of the consensus that supported Ptolemy for 15 centuries, right? I am sure they were ardent believers in the Steady State theory too, right? Get back to me, OK?] 

It reminds me of the glory days of the Clinton administration when Handsome Billy from Hot Springs, King of the One-Eyed Trouser Snakes told us in August, 1998 that it was hot, really hot and that the reason it was really, really hot in DC was because of Global Warming. And, of course, the consensus of top scientist was that heat caused Global Warming.

I swear that he said that.

It was the same day that Donna Shalala told us not to worry about the heat killing us because we would all be dead in 10 years from AIDS.

And you can look that up.

There is a bit of whimsey in remembering Global Warming warnings in 1998 when one of the top scientists in the whole wide world, a real consensus maker, Paul Ehrlich, Ph.D. told us in 1968 we would freeze to death by the year 2000. And who says God doesn’t have a sense of humor? He must be a pisser.

Speaking of ancient times, I suggested to you in 1997 – also the Miami Herald – that you show us the way to climate sanity by turning off all your A/Cs. I guess you took Saint Augustine’s pre-conversion advice when he kept saying, “Make me strong God, tomorrow.”

As for the 2 boobs, Suzan Glickman and George Cavros, who want to raise unicorns on their rainbow stew vineyard, both of which prosper when “Imagine” is hummed, I am calling the Guinness Book of Records. Their pictures will define the exponentially expanding section titled Horses’ Asses. Not quite as big a tautology as Bubba’s, but Great Caesar’s Ghost, res ipso loquitur.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – I may have been a bot harsh on tautologies. If it weren’t for them modern American Liberals would never have to use their brains at all.

June 5, 2019 Randy Schultz The Sun Sentinel RE: “The hobgoblin of small minds” from today’s Sun Sentinel

June 5, 2019

Randy Schultz

The Sun Sentinel

RE: “The hobgoblin of small minds” from today’s Sun Sentinel – Some comments on your Chapter 643 or is it Chapter 1643, there is no difference since the ending is always, always the same, of the perpetual Modern American Liberal Jeremiad on all that public education needs for it to fart gloriously through silk is, and I guessed it, more money.

Yo, Randy!

I wish I could say that Sisyphus finally got that effin’ stone up the hill. I wish I could say that I found a new episode of The Honeymooners. I wish I could say that rain water was beer. I can’t.

On October 4, 1957, the old USSR launched Sputnik. By October 7, incidentally my birthday and the anniversary of the Battle of Lepanto, another Texas-sized ass whupping of radical Islamic terrorists by the good guys, the United States decided that we had to get real smart in math and science real quick. We did. We bitch slapped gravity, got to the moon, walked around, picked up some recuerdos, and came home safe and sound. Also, let the record show that the Interstate Highway system was begun and that a Republican President sent the Screaming Eagles to North Central High School because the Democratic Governor did not want to let Black boys go to school with White girls. But at the end of the day the Interstate Highway system is the main reason we only have 12 years to live, TV is a “wasteland”, and Johnny still can’t read.

Herewith a plan, one that is whetted and honed by Ockham’s Razor. Listen up. There will be a test.

#1 – Do away with tenure. If it is so God Damn good why not have it have it for coaches? Jet pilots? Thoracic surgeons? Bar tenders? Defense lawyers? Dry wall hangers? Short order cooks? Coffee traders? Blood test readers? Mohels? If you can’t punish failure you can’t reward success. Plus, it enshrines mediocrity.

#2 – Hazard pay for special schools. You know where “they” are.

#3 – Treat the English teacher with the same respect you treat the football coach.

#4 – The children of Executive branch officials must attend public schools, just like Amy Carter and the Bush twins did.

#5 – Random defenestration of school administrators like they were Helots.

#6 – Find out why Achilles stayed in his tent.

#7 – Antigone/Creon. Pick one. Why?

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

May 29, 2019 Randy Schultz The Sun Sentinel RE: Did you really say that? Some comments on your column about the venal intentions of rat bastard Florida Republicans who are in Jerusalem positioning themselves for the 2024 Republican Presidential primaries which is, I believe the major premise of your mind-altering column in today’s Sun Sentinel, I think. Mr. Schultz,

May 29, 2019

Randy Schultz

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Did you really say that? Some comments on your column about the venal intentions of rat bastard Florida Republicans who are in Jerusalem positioning themselves for the 2024 Republican Presidential primaries which is, I believe the major premise of your mind-altering column in today’s Sun Sentinel, I think.

Mr. Schultz,

Before I get to the meat – forgive me, meat from non-farting cows and thus I pay obeisance to Gaia – of your column, there are 2 letter high, off speed, batting practice pitches that I must not overswing on. Fasten your seat belt, you modern American Liberal poltroon!

#1 – Gillum did not become Governor because a significant number of single moms, women of color, of course, did not vote for him. In your column you write that “some African-Americans spurned one of their own”. God’s Holy Trousers, but you actually wrote that. No hint of Godot or Seinfeld, just a simple fact as observed by someone who still believes in SALT 1, SALT 2, and both the Kyoto and Paris Climate Accords. Would not Logic dictate [I know, I know, Logic to a card carrying, fire breathing modern American Liberal is like dawn, holy water, and a crucifix to a vampire] that Obama was twice elected because “some White Americans spurned one of their own?” If all the non-Whites across this fruited plain voted twice for him, he still wouldn’t have been elected. And, because I’m from Hudson County, New Jersey, that possibility can’t be ruled out.

#2 – You write that Scott did nothing on drug prices “even as other states took action to cut prices”.  At last we can apply the scientific method to a modern American Liberal claim. 

Scott was governor for 8 years. Despite Obama’s claim that there were “57 or 58 states;” the science is settled: the number is 50. I take 8 prescription drugs a day, some more than once. I am acutely aware of the price of drugs. Please tell me, and be very specific, which states cut the price of which drugs? Lenin, a very popular forebear of  some modern American Liberals, said, “People vote with their feet.” Do you have the 800 number for Mayflower?

You end your column by criticizing 3 Florida Republicans, Governor DeSantis, Senator Rubio, and Senator Scott, for positioning themselves for the 2024 Republican Presidential primaries. 

Why pick on people who plan ahead? Do you chastise people with 401Ks or IRAs?

Besides, if wing-nut, moon bat Congresswoman AOC is right, we’ll be in sight of the 18^th pin by then and it won’t really matter, will it?

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – As a leading modern American Liberal media mogul, one who is genetically indisposed to reincarnation, can you tell me if Senator Frank Church and Senator Vance Hartke, both presumed long dead, will be candidates for the 2020 Democratic Presidential nomination? Images of Senator Hartke, long famed in DC for breath like kerosene, and Senator Church, long revered for the death of American operatives in Eastern Europe, have been seen renting big blocks of rooms in Iowa and New Hampshire.

May 27, 2019 Letter to the Editor The Star Ledger New Jersey Advance Media

May 27, 2019

Letter to the Editor

The Star Ledger

New Jersey Advance Media

RE: “Anti-Muslim Flyers” – Which part of the First Amendment gives you the most problems? Some comments on hurt towel-head feelings, geese and ganders, and why are modern American Liberals now in favor of prior restraint? And all this from a guy from Bayonne.

Sirs, madams, & undecideds,

Didn’t the Supreme Court rule that people dressed up as Nazis could march through a section of Skokie, Illinois known to be filled with Holocaust survivors?

Has Billingsgate been gentrified?

Didn’t the New York Times support slavery in 1864? Didn’t they acquiesce on calling Lincoln a “baboon” the same year?

Is there no more Bedlam to retire to?

Do hate crime laws stop hate crimes? 

If I were to mention that 1287 years ago radical Islamic terrorists were raping, looting, and pillaging their way across Europe would that be anti-Muslim and a hate crime?

If I were to mention that 448 years ago radical Islamic terrorist were planning to invade Rome where they would, rape, loot, and pillage after they stables their horses in the Sistine Chapel would that be anti-Muslim and a hate crime?

If I were to mention that 336 years ago radial Islamic terrorists were going to conquer Vienna where, in addition to their usual schedule of cross-cultural mayhem, including but not limited to rape, looting, and pillaging they were going to kill Bach, would that be considered anti-Muslim and a hate crime?

I think at one time truth was an absolute defense against libel. 

Don’t let my use of the subjunctive fool you. 

The above things, acts of feral savagery, happened just as surely as Brother Henri Verges, FMS, was hacked to death on May 8, 1994 – martyr is such a harsh verb/noun, isn’t it? – by radical Islamic terrorists. Would that be considered anti-Muslim? Would that be a hate crime? Would that make me a repeat offender, a serial hate mongering criminal?

Did the Jews who were sliced and diced in Pairs because of a G-d Damn cartoon deserve to be sliced and diced to teeny-weeny pieces with no regard to the rules of kassruth? If I mention it does that make it anti-Muslim and a hate crime.

20 years ago Nat Hentoff told me if I were to get arrested at a town council meeting in Lauderdale by the Sea for defending the First Amendment he would write a column about me. I told him, like Lincoln, if it weren’t for the honor I’d rather walk.

But that was me. You’re a newspaper. 

It’s what makes you different from a drug store or an ice cream store.

Bill Belicheck said it better.

DO YOUR JOB.

KEVIN SMITH

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – 1287 years ago? Tours

          448 years ago? Lepanto

           336 years ago? Vienna

         Look them up

May 27, 2019 Rosemary O’Hara – Editorial Page Editor The Sun Sentinel RE: Journalistic hubris – Some comments on the wretched excesses found in today’s truncated edition of the Sun Sentinel’

May 27, 2019

Rosemary O’Hara – Editorial Page Editor

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Journalistic hubris – Some comments on the wretched excesses found in today’s truncated edition of the Sun Sentinel’

Ms. O’Hara.

Before I get to the real reason for my pre-dawn response on the assault on my aesthetic sensibilities, an assault which in olden days would have demanded a severe beating about the head and shoulders of the perpetrators – rhetorically speaking – grant me a brief digression.

Your Local section begins with the following headline:

“Seven upcoming ballot initiatives to watch in Florida”

Why, pray tell, should I watch them?

I’m not sure who “they” are but they were sure watching a few years ago when a whole bunch of deplorable vipers exercised one of the rights most sought after by modern American Liberals more than a century ago – the right of referendum. The question of whether same-sex couples should be able to marry each other was put on the ballot. The people, in their collective wisdom, voted it down. And, may I add, voted it down overwhelmingly. The populi really voxed on that one, didn’t they? Alas, it was like dust on the wind. “They”, whoever the Hell “they” are, decided that that was not up to their standards. “They” called a Mulligan saying that while all referenda are equal some referenda are more unequal than others.

I remember telling my kids that if you don’t like the answer you probably shouldn’t have asked the question.

So, tell me, gentle Lady, why should I even bother to read any of the proposed referenda? Will “they” signal which way I should vote? Better yet, why not “them” vote”

Here’s a thought.

Rightly or wrongly, Florida elections resemble a cluster fluck. They are worthy of afternoon television. Why not let “them” decide what is beast for us? That way we can save the cost of the election and the opprobrium and obloquy which reaches either new heights or new depths whenever we vote. Watching a Florida election is like watching an episode of the Gong Show on steroids, opioids, cum crack.

Do you think the God Damn rat bastard Russkies are continuing their tradition, a tradition that was begun successfully in 1932, of interfering in our elections?  It is a situation up with which I will not put. 

But back to why I write.

Your Jeffrey Schweers, listed as a special correspondent, apparently doesn’t feel special or comfortable enough to put a return address on his by-line so I write to you.

On Page 10A, he writes a fascinating sentence which I must quote in its entirety with the italics being mine.

“As Florida faces the challenge of feeding 30 million people

by 2035, Wilton Simpson, a Republican of Trilby who is in line

to be Senate President, hopes to bring back information that

 can shape future policy.”

Does that include recipes? I presume it bans all GMOs – genetically modified foods – which reminds me that we should ban carrots, broccoli, potatoes, wheat, and while we’re at it, how about revoking the Nobel Prize that Norman Borlaug won? I’ll make an exception for broccoli.

Is your votary putting the kibosh on Bernie Sanders? Bernie the Bolshie touts the wonders of Socialism but how is Florida supposed to feed 30,000,000 people in 15 years if Cuba and Venezuela can’t feed 41,000,000 people today? The evidence of our own eyes suggests that there are 3 problems common to Cuba and Venezuela. To show that I am the most multi-culturally inclusive guy since Kipling let me toss in Zimbabwe and North Korea. And, because I am reading “The River War” by Churchill, that curmudgeonly Imperialist, Sudan. Those problems are #1 – Breakfast #2 - #2 – Lunch - #3 – Dinner.

Or is he hoping for better results the next time, with this time being when really smart, and I mean really, really smart, people get to run the unicorn ranch, cook the rainbow stew, and tend to the balloon juice vines? It is, forgive me, a well-known fact that  socialist countries are judged not on how well they run things but, rather on how well they say they will run things. 

A “turd in the punch bowl” inconvenient fact, a fact that has the added power of being empirically and data-driven true, is that 5 years into the New Deal, FDR’s policies had made the country worse off than it was when he put his well-intended thumb on the scale.

I think your Mr. Schweers is a bit too subtle by half for me. That’s why I’m keeping my manatee traps. Unborn female sushi, paired with some $2 Buck Chuck Red Blend and all I can do is quote the still legendary Big Mike from Bayonne, “That’s why you never see anybody swimming to Cuba”

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

May 26, 2019 Nancy Ancrum – Editorial Page Editor The Miami Herald RE: Climate Change – Some comments, none of which is remotely reverential, on the monotonously perpetual, oh so achingly familiar, modern American Liberal Jeremiad on “It’s cold in the winter and warm in the summer for which we must be punished” by sacrificing at the altar of the Church of Saint Lud, as reported in this morning’s Miami Herald.

May 26, 2019

Nancy Ancrum – Editorial Page Editor

The Miami Herald

RE: Climate Change – Some comments, none of which is remotely reverential, on the monotonously perpetual, oh so achingly familiar, modern American Liberal Jeremiad on “It’s cold in the winter and warm in the summer for which we must be punished” by sacrificing at the altar of the Church of Saint Lud, as reported in this morning’s Miami Herald.

Ms. Ancrum,

Of course, the science is “settled”. Just ask Ptolemy. Along came a cheeky Eye-Tie who looked in his telescope and said “Pero si muove” and the world was changed, utterly.

Just ask Fred Hoyle. Who?

I won’t mention Darwin lest you think I am, not only a “deplorable” but an ignorant one to boot. I ask but one question. Why, after almost 160 years, is his Theory still called a theory?

Didn’t Paul Ehrlich tell us more than 50 years ago that we all be dead by the year 2000? Didn’t former Vice President Alpha Gump tell us 30 years ago that we would all be fried to death in 10 years?

Check the weather records for Boston in 1821. It was known as “The Year Summer Never Came” because it snowed in June. Did Trump cause that?

Here’s a poser. According to the local Injuns, Hudson River Aborigines, the word “Adirondack” means “dry and bitter ground”. And that was 2 centuries before the Industrial Revolution and its dreaded “acid rain”. 

Every 750,000 years or so, the Yellowstone Basin explodes, ending life as we know it. I don’t want to remind the world but we are in the middle of the “envelope” for it to happen again. If we promise not to breathe out and we train our cows not to fart it still may be too late to break out the ’66 Latour and listen to the overture of “The Marriage of Figaro” for the last time.

Wazupwid Congresswoman AOC? She said we all be worm food in 12 years. It’s bad enough that she says it but not a single adult who believes that raising the minimum wage and taxes and increasing regulations are the keys for everybody to “fart through silk” has stood up and said “What a fucking moron”. The beauty of modern American Liberal nihilism, coupled with a large dose of mind-numbing, Guinness Book stupidity is that these poltroons daren’t say Jack Shit. The term “feckless cunt” comes to mind – She is terrified by a garbage disposal system, remember? – but that may be a bit harsh on Memorial Day.

If she is right, we’re doomed. If she is wrong, we’re doomed. At least Hobson had a choice. I am thinking of opening the cognac, lighting up one of the Cuban stogies and launching all my plastic straws into the Intercoastal. Why should the manatees suffer longer than they have to?

The United States, and who cares whether we are aware of the “existential threat” or not, has significantly and substantially cut its carbon emissions. China and India have not. Tom Steyer. A bloody hypocrite if ever one existed,   made a gazillion dollars selling “dirty” coal to them. [“Dirty” is defined as coal that could not, under any circumstances, be burned in this country. Whatever faults those countries have, having an aggressive EPA ain’t one of them.] And you want us to stay in the facacta Paris Climate Accord?

Here’s a plan for you. 

Turn off all you’re A/Cs.

No private cars.

Ban all plastic.

Walk the walk.

Show us the way.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

May 21, 2019 I believe in Climate Change.

May 21, 2019

I believe in Climate Change. To state the obvious, and to pay tribute to Anthony Trollope, listen to Vivaldi. To publicly profess my belief in it, I sometimes wear a ball cap that proclaims that I am a PROUD GLOBAL WARMER. 

I state 2 obviously self-evident truths.

#1 – Global Warming ended the last Ice Age. Look it up.

#2 – Global Warming gave us the Renaissance. Send a SASE

Incidentally, the last Ice Age started in Canada, specifically Quebec. Just one more reason to piss in the soup of les merdes du Quebec.

Furthermore, perhaps the icing on the cake, is that an upward spike in temperature about 10 centuries ago led to the Renaissance. A downward spike in the Adriatic 5 centuries ago led to Stradivarius making some boffo stringed instruments. Send a SASE.

Before he became a big-time lech and began to inspire Harvey Weinstein, before he began to stuph his step-daughter, Woody Allen, nee Koenigsberg, was a rock star favorite of modern American Liberals. And never more so than when he made a movie titled “The Front”. That was the first movie that he made after he decided not to be funny. He had to earn his bones as a true Social Justice Warrior before the term entered anyone’s lexicon.

The line that signaled the end of him being funny, the line that got all the bearded clams snapping to tumescently throbbing attention, was when he told the Congressional Committee Chairman to “Go fuck himself”. He said this right after he told them to shove their subpoenas up their collective arses.

Why do I think that the same nosegays will not be offered to any member of the Trump Administration who tells the same thing to Fat Jerry and his supine butt-boys in Congress? Fat Jerry engaging in monogenesis should be on Pay TV. In his case, the Baedeker will include the following monitum: Gorilla Glue a 2 by 10 horizontally across your ass and aim for the dry spot. There are no long tail cats left in his office. It’s like getting lambs to volunteer to spend the night with Simba. He has been known to kill a Big Tom by stepping on his tail. Also, his shadow is revered at Stonehenge and is rumored to kill rodents.

Even though I know that he didn’t build it himself, find out who made lithium batteries practical. I’ll buy him a beer. I had a 1964 edition of the Britannica that showed a working MRI in 1945. Also, I remember seeing my first working microwave in 1953 at the Bayonne Navy Base. It cooked a completely frozen, hard as a rock, hot dog in about 30 seconds. It was 5-foot cube and weighed 1000 pounds. Not quite ready for re-heating Chinese.

Jeff Daniels said that if Trump is re-elected it will be because the GOP is racist and that Democracy will end. The good news is that you will be able to tell when deplorable crackers are coming in because they will have permanent bad breath and don’t believe in dentistry.

I will not go to NYC to see him portray Atticus Finch in “To Kill a Mockingbird” because new DNA evidence shows that Tom Robinson really did rape Eula Mae. 

I have begun to read “The River War” by Winston Churchill. His penchant for calling, forgive me, a spade a spade would be verboten. It could not be published today. 

Who said “Barack Obama is clean and articulate. He is a light skinned African-American with no Negro dialect unless he wants one.”

A – Somebody from Chick-fil-A?

B – Trump

C – Curley Biden & Dirty Harry Reid

D – Dirty Harry Reid & Curley Biden

Hint: It’s not A and it’s not B.

John Walker Lindh is going to be released from Federal prison this week. He took up arms against his country and was captured in Afghanistan by Americans. He was fighting for the bloody WOGs. While he was in prison, he became a citizen of the Republic of Ireland. How did that happen? The treasonous dog should have been shot. In World War 2, my wife’s father, Lt. Cmdr., Walter Chapman, MD saw combat in the North Atlantic. That was the war with Hitler. That was the war that the Republic of Ireland took a Pass on. How did that happen? Hitler. The port of Cork would have provided an excellent anchorage. It was denied to American vessels. It added to their peril. I have a book, “The Irish Guards in the Great War”, written by Rudyard Kipling. It tells of the exploit of the First Battalion of the Irish Brigade all of whom were volunteers, most of whom were Roman Catholic. In the book, Kipling apologizes for what was his previous anti-Catholic feelings. Death, the great leveler in war, dispenses her favors without consideration of creed. Their absence in the war against Hitler is a stain that can never be bleached. 

And now they make this treacherous shit a citizen?

Who will be next? Judas? Benedict Arnold? Eddie Slovik? The Rosenbergs? Willy Horton? And why not Sirhan Sirhan?