October 2, 2019 Randy Schultz The Sun Sentinel RE: Not so fast on canonizing Janny Reno ‘cuz a Devil’s Advocate has just entered the lists, stage Right, pursued by a Bear, bent on bringing a bit of History to the fore. Some comments on your pant wetting, sloppy kiss of Janny, aka “The Butcher of Waco”, in your unlinkable column in today’s Sun Sentinel fails to mention.

October 2, 2019 

Randy Schultz 

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Not so fast on canonizing Janny Reno ‘cuz a Devil’s Advocate has just entered the lists, stage Right, pursued by a Bear, bent on bringing a bit of History to the fore. Some comments on your pant wetting, sloppy kiss of Janny, aka “The Butcher of Waco”, in your unlinkable column in today’s Sun Sentinel fails to mention.

Mr. Schultz,

Of course, in re Janny, the rule of de morituis should apply. I chose however to issue an exception to this rule for 2 reasons: #1 – Modern American Liberals are bound neither by law, custom, nor tradition. Mentioning the permanent things to them is like surrounding the blood bank by a moat filled with holy water, crucifixes, and pecks of ripe garlic, the better to keep the vampires at bay.  #2 – If they can pick and choose which laws to obey, a condition better known as eclectic indignation, so can I. I know it sets tu quoque on its arse but since your favorite color is plaid, you’ll get used to it right quick.

A – Florida – Janny was the state’s Attorney in Broward County. 2 things distinguish her tenure. Every case of child abuse case that resulted in a guilty verdict, each and every one, no exceptions, was overturned on appeal. Her record is matched only by Maurice Nadjari, special prosecutor/hired gun for the Knapp Commission, the entity that pursued police corruption in NYC. All of his convictions, no exceptions, were overturned. Who says my contempt is sexist?

She also pre-dated the brouhaha of Sanctuary Cities by adopting Calhoun’s Theory of Nullification, the one that all good men thought was done in at Appomattox, the one that said that non-Federal entities – states, counties, cities – could pick and choose which Federal laws to obey. She did this by claiming that local jurisdictions preempted Federal jurisdiction on any drug deal involving gun fire in Miami/Dade County. It made for some interesting late-night confrontations by heavily armed evidence gatherers. The result was that during the reign of the Cocaine Cowboys and Miami Vice there was zero cooperation between state and Federal cops.

The term “fucking moron” would fit comfortably within her bio envelope. “Fucking” too harsh a term for you? I am not a member of Congress and I doubt I will win an Academy Award but if it’s OK for them to say “fucking” it’s OK for me, right?

B – Federal – Janny began her illustrious Federal career by charbroiling some 7 dozen of her fellow citizens. I say “some 7 dozen” because my double-degreed daughter did some post-autopsy research when she was at Baylor University. One of her teachers told her that 84 autopsies were performed, not counting the unaccounted-for femur.

Let me back this up a bit. 

President Handsome Billy from Hot Springs tasked the AG job to his long-suffering spouse, soon to be known as Wide-Bottomed Hillary, the bane of travel agents and channeler of Eleanor Roosevelt. It can be revealed now that she sang “Ghost Riders in the Sky” whenever she walked past a picture of her. She soon replaced her as the most shit upon First Lady. I’ll say this for her husband. When he was getting his knob polished by the zoftig non-shicksa in the Oval Office, he did not as Yeats did not suffer le grand mort while enjoying le petit mort like FDR did.

It must be noted that she was the third choice for the A/G job. The first kept indentured servants in the broom closet of her carriage house. The second one, a Federal Judge who flashed her yoo-ha at some defense lawyers to signal her intent for some late afternoon interpersonal, really up close and personal, ex parte communications.

It was thought that Janny lived in one previous owned Air Steam and had taken a vow of chastity when she was 3. Maybe 2. 

She was the phantom “controlling legal authority” that Vice President Alpha Gump cited when the fix was in on him getting $300,000, all of which was by credit card, from a dozen discalced mendicant Buddhist nuns, all of whom had taken a vow of poverty. 

As to her “Profile in Courage” moment, I never said she couldn’t do math. Unless video tape evidence of Big Bill sniffing Mother Teresa’s bicycle seat or taking a run at Rosalyn Carter there was no way the Democratic Senate was going to convict him.

Ending on a positive note, I liked her appearance on Saturday Night Live. I didn’t say she was Michelle Pfeiffer. She did not tip her side of the canoe, the one with such stout paddlers as Donna Shalala, Rosa DeLaura, and Barbara Mikulski.

Even though she hasn’t earned it, RIP.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – She went so far into the tank for the Clintons she should have worn a SPEEDO. That would have been some picture, right?