November 9, 2018 Nancy Ancrum – Editorial Page Editor The Miami Herald

November 9, 2018

Nancy Ancrum – Editorial Page Editor

The Miami Herald

3511 NW 91^st Street

Miami, FL 33172

RE: “Elections happen…” As does shit. Some comments on the coming count, recount, count again, one more time, keep counting tableau about to unfold in Broward County. Is it déjà vu all over again? Or is it “the triumph of hope over experience”?

Ms. Ancrum,

2 digressions:

#1 – As long as the George Soros-funded thugs can show up at Tucker Carlson’s house and call him a “racist scumbag”, while scaring the BeJeezus out of his wife, the strict rules of tu quoque allow, indeed encourage, me to say, inter alia, shit.

#2 – The ghosts of Strunck & White, of H.M. Fowler, are trembling. John McPhee turns his eyes away. In today’s medium-dudgeoned editorial – medium-dudgeoned because Election Supervisor Brenda Snipes, the alleged culprit, is not only a Democrat but the stereotypical Broward County modern American Liberal one. And to complete a 3-horse parlay, she is a mutli-degreed female who is carries her excess melanin well. [Let the record show that she replaced Miriam Oliphant, another multi-degreed woman of color, who was dumber than a box of hammers.] Your vitriol is saved for people who don’t believe in 4^th trimester abortions, Midnight Basketball, or manatee suffrage. You write, with no hint of drollery or quasi-sardonic wit, that Governor Scott’s charge of fraud is an “evidence-free allegation”.

Listen up, gentle lady.

All “allegations” are “evidence free”. That’s why they are called “allegations”. Vide “alleged perpetrator”.

Some other examples:

A – Trump threw out the bust of Martin Luther King.

B – Trump stops by his daughter’s office each day for “a bit of the gobble”.

C – Tucker Carlson is a racist scumbag.

D -  The rules used in the Kavanaugh “Star Chamber” show should apply to Keith Ellison.

I had an uncle, my mother’s brother, who lived on Randolph Avenue in Jersey City. He died in May, 1956. Such was his devotion to the Hudson County Democratic Party that he never missed an election – Row A All the Way! – until he was stopped in 1971 by a Federal Court Judge appointed by a Republican President.

Thank God for Google.

Look up Landslide Lyndon and see how his hondler Abe Fortas managed to find enough votes in and around Duval County, and in alphabetical order to boot, to get LBJ elected to the Senate. That was when construction on the shiny black wall in Washington, the one with 58,272 names on it, was begun.

I mention that because of another “evidence-free allegation” in re Mayor Richard Daley. You remember him, don’t you? He was the guy who told Senator Abraham Ribicoff [D-CT] to go fuck himself during the 1968 Democratic Convention in, and you probably guessed it, Chicago. I remember that as a fun time and as a teaching moment. Urban organizers, community activists, participatory Democracy, speaking truth to power. Don’t you miss the good old days?

Irish-Catholics, and I am one, tend to think thanatoptically when the 18^th pin is in sight. Thus, it is alleged, Mayor Daley sought absolution for fixing the 1960 election in favor of Kennedy. Daly thought that if Kennedy had not been elected there would not have been the abattoir in Vietnam. The facts would support that allegation.

After the FUBAR – FUBAR? Send a SASE – recount in Broward County in 2000, I became engaged in an electronic colloquy with Tome Fiedler, then the Editorial Page Editor of the Miami Herald. Boss Fiedler was in favor of counting and counting and counting until the numbers came out right. I said that he must be a fan of the movie “Key Largo”. In it a character named “Curly” Hoff, played superbly well by Thomas Gomez, gives his definition of vote counting. “You count them and you count them and you keep on counting them until you get the numbers you want.”

Didn’t Wide-Bottomed Hillary, and if miserable skank Kathy Griffin can walk around with a severed Trump head, I can call attention to Hillary’s Rubenesque arse, tell us that civility would return when the Dems took over the House? Why, I ask civilly, why do these things happen only in true-Blue, modern American Liberal counties? Hudson County, Cook County, Duval County, Palm Beach County, and, lest we forget, Ground Zero of POOdom, Perpetually Outraged and Offended, Broward County.

Your editorial asks why “Broward County voters have not shown her [Snipes] the door”. The answer is simple. Unless she had a love child with OJ Simpson, and was seen helping Congressman Alcee Hastings steal a hot stove and, far worse, was videotaped whistling Dixie, the voters of Broward County will not “show her the door”. 

Since it is beyond parody it is beyond satire or just plain scorn. It is, as the original Doctor J said, “the triumph of hope over experience”. Let the games begin. 

Kevin Smith

PS – “Attention must be paid” to Joy Behar’s take on why the Senate will stay Republican. Let me add that I remember her when she was funny and not just an object of scorn and derision. When she was reminded that the Senate will stay Republican she immediately said, and on national TV to boot, that it was the result of gerrymandering. “The woman is a boob and that’s an end to it.”