April 18, 2019 Why, pray tell, is it OK, indeed both beneficial and salutary, for a cross to be hung in a see-through vat filled with piss?

April 18, 2019

Why, pray tell, is it OK, indeed both beneficial and salutary, for a cross to be hung in a see-through vat filled with piss?

Why is it a sign of political tolerance and maturity for a miserable skank like Kathy Griffin, and Boyo, does she give miserable cunts a bad name – and in her defense, at least she isn’t feckless, right? – to hold a severed head of Donald Trump?

Why is it Islamophobic per se to say radical Islamic terrorists hijacked planes, planes that they are incapable of building, and flew them onto buildings that they never could have could have constructed? If I were to say that they, the Muslim WOGs, were just continuing the tradition begun by their feral forebears at Tours 1287 years ago, at Lepanto 448 years ago, at Vienna 336 years ago, and at Omdurman 121 years ago? Does anyone else see a pattern here?

Why did the earth tilt on its axis and the poles reversed and the masses revolted and the crops failed and the dunces ascended conspiratorially and T-Rex appeared and Lent was ruined when someone, I daresay a deplorable bitter clinger, declared publicly that Mayor Pete was a “Hoosier finocchio”?

By the by, and slightly paraphrasing Scrooge, are the Alien & Sedition laws still on the books? And speaking of that glorious time, some 20% of the Federal budget went for either ransoms or protection money. It gave rise, after one of the three dirtiest campaigns in American History, 1800, 1824, 1828, all of which were done without the benefit of electricity, to the saying “Millions for defense but not one cent for tribute.”

How many Italian-Americans and how many Germans did FDR lock up in 1942 because he thought they presented a clear and present danger to the Republic? Does anyone else remember that Lincoln locked up and deported some Congressmen in 1862?

Let’s not forget the sly beauty of Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation, as definitive an Executive Order as was ever issued, freed the slaves where he couldn’t and kept them in bondage where he could have freed them?

But on to other mundane things.

With the exception of her husband, no one but no one has gone as far as Michelle Obama has with so few accomplishments on her c.v.

In her senior thesis at Princeton – and yes, unlike the still sequestered one by Wide Bottomed Hillary, the one about Saul Alinsky, the noted urban reformer, I have read it – she bemoans the twin crosses of race and gender that she to bear, burdens that can’t be lessened by a 12-Srtep program. Then she realizes that she can turn chicken shit into chicken salad when she realizes that a “clean and articulate” Black chick can game the system like one of those swarthy card sharks on 46^th Street

Blacks with degrees from 2 Ivy League schools have been, are, and will be pearls of precious price in the real world. Thus, she wound up at Sidley Austin, as White Shoe a law firm as could be found then and now, she distinguished herself in 3 ways there. She couldn’t negotiate, she couldn’t litigate, and, thus, she had nobody to bill.

She was saved from the disgrace of defaulting on her ginormously proportioned student loans – Somebody had to pay for those degrees – by the public sector. The University of Chicago Hospital hired her as quasi-legal adviser to the midnight shift bed pan fetchers and ass wipers to steer them away from joining a union.

Let the record show that it was just a coincidence, kind of like when as Jeeves said to Bertie, “Sometimes you find a trout in the milk”, that her husband, well versed by Reverend Wright and Bill Ayers, who parlayed his experience as an urban activist into the Goddamn United States Senate, got a $1,000,000 “earmark” for her employer. In true Chicago fashion, this was acknowledged when her next paycheck reflected a $4,000 – repeat - $4,000 a week raise. 

Let the record show that while in the Senate he voted in favor of a wall on the Mexican border, against same-sex marriage, and in favor of a military surge in Afghanistan.

How can she top that? Easy. Put her mother in the White House, rent free, as a built-in baby sitter and then get her on the public teat to boot. And that too is the Chicago way! 

Go Bernie! But take your time before telling us whether you favor the stolid Bulgarian model of Socialism or the Mugabe School of Trotsky is too slow and we could learn from Pol Pot crash course of social upheaval. Also, don’t forget that Lenin wanted to line Moscow’s urinals with gold.

In 2016, Hillary and her hit chick, the viperish Little Debbie of Broward, dispensed with all the TLC foreplay and the political KY Jelly and gave you an ass-reaming that grows in legend each year. [It is owed to the ledger to point out that Landslide Lyndon in 1848 and Tricky Dick Daley in 1960, by virtue of their shit sandwich politics, gave us the design and the construction schedule of the Vietnam Wall. You, by virtue of your time in the barrel, gave us Trump. for which a grateful nation will always thank you. It doesn’t mean you can’t can’t be pissed off. Not too many pols could have their backs pissed on and publicly endorse the 2 pissers.]

I like you, despite your abysmal, mostly vincible, ignorance of History, of Economics, and your persistent pathological need to offend Logic every time you tell us, like some half-assed Lysenko zombie, how to get 33 ounces out of a quart bottle.

I want you to run because “you are smart and no fool” and you say things that Professor Irwin Corey wouldn’t dare. And Biden, aka as Curley, in honor of the smartest Stooge, is a boob

Do you remember when it becomes obvious, painfully obvious, to everyone except Pauline Kael – I read her review of “Dirty Harry” and ran to the nearest cinema and bought 2 tickets – that George McGovern was going to get his ass kicked in a Texas-sized ass whupping? I do. James Reston, he of the still disgraced, first Russian electoral collusionist, Pulitzer Prize winner Walter Duranty of the New York times, a bought and paid for stooge of the NKVD, successful as I recall, commanded you to keep campaigning even though there were doubts that you would vote for yourself. Old Scotty wanted the McGovern message of “corn fields all day and ballet at night” to be etched into our political tradition, even though it was going to rivla the outcome of the Israeli Air Force versus the hapless Syrians, the WOGs who make armed mullets look like Achilles Maybe Allah is Akbar but he can’t fly a jet worth a shit..

I want you out there proclaiming that not only will lunch be free but as soon as I get the attention of Congress you will be paid to eat it. Also, and this will happen within the first 100 hours, rainwater will turn into beer. Forget about free college, free Medicare, and free stuff. Free beer! Today! Tomorrow! Forever! This might tick off Sierra Nevada but you can’t make an omelet without braking eggs, right?

Then we can bring back a long-forgotten gem of William F. Buckley. 

A very simple solution to the high cost of college – and here comes Ockham’s Razor to the rescue yet again – is, providing you survive the perpetually honed scythe in the Planned Parenthood abattoir, and perpetual thanks to Margaret Sanger, Hitler’s favorite American at least until Ambassador Joe Kennedy came along, when you are born you get 2 pieces of paper. One is a birth certificate and the other is a Bachelor’s degree. Science or Arts being your choice. Fill it in when you either stop shitting in your pants or cast your first vote, whichever comes first.

Don’t forget to tell us that FDR was Mussolini’s biggest fan. He used to send high level bureaucrats to Italy to observe and report back on il Duce’s Italianate hand of governance. It is uncertain if Alger Hiss ever went to Rome to see if the trains really ran on time.

T.E. Lawrence told us that “Not much can be gained from a sure victory but a certain defeat can be priceless.”

Since all my capital is tied up in debt, I shan’t be sending you any.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – The Duke was right, and God Bless John Wayne for saying, “Never apologize. It’s a sign of weakness.” You are going to spend a lot of time explaining that which is metaphysically and epistemologically impossible to accomplish: Giving a tax cut to someone with no income. On the other hand, I have an example of White Privilege deeply planted in the special interest written, perpetually blooming tax code. You can root it out to great applause from the assembled Social Justice Warriors. It will be a simple tax row for you to hoe.

Do you know any Black people who own municipal bonds?

I don’t either.

White people, by a stupendously over whelming majority, own municipal bonds.

Income earned from these bonds is, by virtue of the Tax Code and divers Tax Court rulings, exempt from the lamprey-like grip of Sam, the Tax Man.

That means that the portion of the righteous tax burden not borne by the ultra-Privileged Whit folk is shifted in a blatantly obvious, racially discriminating manner to the already lashed backs of struggling Black folk, almost all of whom are both victims of life’s circumstances plus being born “unlucky in life’s lottery”.

Boy, but that sucks, doesn’t it?

Step up and rale against this racist injustice and to Hell with the freakin’ infrastructure.

OK. OK. This is the last point

Of all the dim dumb Dems running for President their tax returns show one common denominator. There once was Golden Rule in re American making charitable contributions. “Most Jews, rich Protestants, and poor Catholics” was the demographic score card of big, reach in your pocket, causes in this country. When it comes to charitable contributions – not the NRA and not NARAL – but causes such as the Rescue Squad, the animal shelter, the Little League, these cheap bastards, modern American Liberals all, are tighter than clams’ asses. And believe me when I say this, they are waterproof. I mean these skinflints toss quarters around like they were man hole covers. Correction. Person hole covers. Is it true that priority letters will no longer be delivered by a mail man but by a person person?

WAZUPWIDAT?