AN UPDATE ON FRAU OBERST DEBBIE WASSERMAN-SCHULTZ

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN

AN UPDATE ON

FRAU OBERST DEBBIE WASSERMAN-SCHULTZ
9/21/11


I Let the 10th anniversary of Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz, she of the Medusa wanabee hair, she of the perpetual giving her husband’s bank a wink, a nod, and a long swig from the public teat, she of forgetting which President signed the homophobic “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” reg, she of the great civility speech given after a mad man shot her friend but before Chip off the old block Young Thug Hoffa, Jr, said, “Let’s take those bastards out”, she of “We own the economy” – Giving the devil her due, every time she stands up she should get a standing O, such is the burden of carrying big brass asymmetrical cojones – sending the cops [Agent Thomas as the Good Cop and Agent Mineva as the Bad Cop, both members of the Florida Department of Law Enforcement]] to my house because of something I wrote.

SEPTEMBER 18, 2001

2 men with badges and guns, 2 men with the full majesty of the law behind them, 2 men following their orders because an elected official, one who claims to have 2 degrees in Political Science, forgot the majestic 5 words at the start of the First Amendment – “CONGRESS SHALL MAKE NO LAW…”

“Free men speak with free tongues” was a good start to a free society when it was first used 25 centuries ago. For someone to say that she has 2 degrees in Political Science and not to be familiar with the agora and parrhesia would indicate that the only classes she ever attended were Chilling Effect 101 and Slippery Slope Seminar. Come to think of it there could be no better academic training for a modern American Liberal than those. “Free Speech For Me But Not For Thee” [Nat Hentoff] is one the books that Little Debbie uses to start her annual book burning raree.

I used to think Debbie was smart.

Smart was replaced by shrewd.

Now I know she’s dumb.

That she is not as dumb as her co-conspirator Commissioner Stacy Ritter is meant to be taken as “damning with faint praise”. Ms. Ritter is so dumb she thinks manual labor is the hombre who mows her lawn. She’s not called “Cementhead
for nothing. Debbie is gaining on her.

The reason for this harsh and cruel but valid and truthful judgment is because of her take on the special election in Brooklyn’s 9th Congressional District.

Move over Baghdad Bob! Here comes Debbie, Debbie!

She said “The Democratic Party has always had a problem with this district”.

Her tongue should have been rocket propelled out of her mouth and into a place of honor at Katz’s Deli.

They solved the problem when Warren Harding was President. That was 90 years ago. Sam Ervin and John C. Stennis, 2 lifelong Democrats and defenders, fierce defenders, of segregation – Did I just repeat myself? - marveled at the ability of the 9th district to elect any Democratic Son or Daughter of the Desert who drew breath on Election Day. District 9 encourages dead men voting. It draws the line at dead candidates winning. If they didn’t FDR would win every election for everything everytime.

Bugsy Siegel and Dutch Schultz [Schultz? Perhaps a DNA check is in order] thought about running there. If they had they would have received 106% of the vote.

This is a district where delis are not permitted to advertise bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwiches.

This is a district where anything less than medium well roast beef earns a visit from the dreaded Food Police and a trip to the culinary side of Camp Gitmo.

This is a district where, thanks to Chinese legerdemain, pork becomes chicken.

This is a district where bi-valve mollusks are allowed to pass through only if they are on sealed trucks and never on Shabbos.

This is a district where the vote to name a park after Julius and Ethel Rosenberg is always close.

This is a district where being a junior mohel can earn you a merit badge.

This is a district where any mention of chicken liver and mayonnaise in the same
sentence can lead to a one-way trip to the stoning pit.

This is a district where Weiner, the eponymously named Congressman, waved his foreskinless weenie around for a month before a late night visit from the Stern Gang convinced him to fall on his sword. That’s the metaphorical sword, not the one eyed trouser snake that now is yet more proof of the law of diminishing returns.

This is a district that just elected a Roman Catholic Republican. It gets better. He was a TV executive who was instrumental in putting Rush Limbaugh on national TV.

And Debbie, Debbie, now the face of the Democratic Party, henceforth to be known as Dizzy Debbie, says that Democrat always had a problem with the 9th district?

The loonies are running the bin. The boobies are running the hatch.

In the big picture, the one that will be unveiled in November, 2012, that may be good.

On the other hand, 2 of the last 3 Vice Presidents – Alpha Gump and Curley Biden – have been, to be charitable, developmentally disabled. Can you imagine them on a tandem bike pedaling in opposite directions? I can. How many ways could they FUBAR a two car funeral? Thank God for logarithms!

This chick knows her base.




Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET