Wednesday, July 27, 2016

July 25, 2016
“As a Catholic…” is immediately followed by a ginormous BUT with the BUT symbolizing the infamous “other shoe”, a shoe the size of a 7 League boot circling just out of reach, gathering speed, about to enter the arena like an ascendant gas guzzling Concorde.
Nominal Roman Catholics who become modern American Liberals have “As a Catholic” tattooed on the inside of their eyelids so there is no chance of phumfering as they describe the Map Quest directions on their personal road to Avernus. Having tossed off the moral certitude of the “permanent things” the need to fill the aching void of believing in nothing is filled by the overwhelming impulse to believe in anything. 
The issue, the anvil on which copper bottomed, iron sheathed tautologies are formed, is abortion.
It is empirically self-evident that we can both have our cake and eat it. What Roman Catholic politicians do is to eat their cake and then proudly proclaim that they still have it.
Mario Cuomo, the notorious Roman Catholic Governor of New York, gave the 1991 commencement address at Notre Dame University. It was great theatre, a stroke of pure genius, to do so. Once you have gone over to the dark side, once you have convinced yourself that since the first death didn’t matter, the 60,000,000 that followed it since 1973 don’t mean much either. God’s Holy Trousers but it’s not really important is it? It’s not a big issue like same-sex bathrooms, right? And besides, almost 40% of them are non-Caucasian. Margaret Sanger would have been proud. Her pupil, Hitler, would have been tumescent.
Governor Cuomo said, “As a Catholic”, he was personally opposed to abortion. As Governor he had no choice but to permit it, it being the “law of the land”.
I wrote to him asking what he would have done if Dredd Scott had been captured on his watch. Logic would dictate that while he was personally opposed to slavery he had no choice but to put him on the midnight train to Georgia, it being the Law of the Land
He never replied. And, like father like son, neither has Andrew Cuomo, the current Governor of New York. 




Comes now Governor/Senator Tim Kaine to the lists.  [I am sure there is a reasonable explanation, hopefully short of perjury, for him taking $160,000 in swag and pelf from office seekers and contract petitioners. And, since Hillary had no problem with it, I shan’t mention it.]
If Berne’s assorted loons and wing nuts, along with run of the mill nihilists, don’t burn the place down Kaine, a proud Roman Catholic, proclaim this week that while he t find, and flush procedures, it being the law of the land.
Socrates, Saint Paul, Saint Thomas More, Thoreau, Gandhi, Kolbe, Martin Luther King, and Mandela do not – repeat – do not call your offices. 
Speaking of the law of the land, it didn’t stop Bill Ayers, Obama’s pal from the White hood, from blowing up a building and killing an occupant. With apologies to Orwell and making some noun adjustments some law of the land laws are not as equal as other law of the land laws
Kaine can ask Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Mikulski, any randomly chosen Kennedy, and the ghost of Senator Moynihan – assuming he will come when summoned – or any other dishonest Catholic politician to square the circle.
Just keep pushing and swallowing hard and hope the scar tissue becomes bullet proof. Besides, this time we will make Midnight Basketball work the way it was meant to, the way it was supposed to, the way that modern American Liberals really, really knew it was going to.
After all, what could go wrong?

Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET




PS – Don’t worry. Debbie’s turn in the barrel is coming.

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

July 19, 2016
“Never get in a pissing contest with a skunk”
I have been reading George Orwell since I was in high school. [Hint – That was back when the Democrats warned us of the Eisenhower caused “Missile Gap”. It was also the time when Democrats couldn’t wait to cut taxes. Give up? Send a SASE] I have no memory, nor does Google, of Orwell ever saying that.
The reason why I mention the above is because of the knotted knickers kerfuffle that was caused by Mrs. Trump’s speech. For the 30 years – it all began with Robert Bork – that I have been setting pen to paper to slay the dragons set loose on the world by the “Trousered Apes” who are the suicide bombers of the wing-nut “moon bat” Left, I have always tried either to source or set off in quotation marks any particularly clever phrase, particularly if I know it’s not mine.

How many ways can she say that her husband is a good earner and a great guy? That he puts the seat down? That “a promise made is a debt unpaid”? That “the early bird gets the worm”? 

Which brings us back to Orwell…..

“The obvious and true have to be defended.
Truisms are true. Hold on to that. The solid world
exists. Its laws do not change. Stones are hard,
water is wet. Objects unsupported fall toward the
Earth’s center. If that is granted all else follows.”

Vice President Curley Biden, he of the Chia Pet hair and porcelain molars and ivory bi-cuspids, not only cribbed the trope of Neil Kinnock, British Labour Leader, he took his whole Goddamn speech. Try as he might the mildly Cockney, quasi Welsh, ne’er do well Midlands style was beyond both his pay scale and vocal range. Yet, and may I add, to his credit he would whistle “Men of Harlech” every chance he got. Forbidden by the Speech Police from having a lawn jockey he kept a Gurkha on his front porch. Kinnock had the Herculean task of sitting across from Lady Thatcher when she was Prime Minister. The Wednesday PM’s Q&A session proved not just the equality of English women but their overall superiority. It is a trait that has not yet arrived in this country’s political arena. And yes, I mean Hillary. A Hecate, yes. A harridan, yes. A heroine, no.








Curley Biden said his dad mined coal for 10 hours and came away from the pit face and played un-American football for a few hours. And now we know why God led us to the discovery of the majestic word “bullshit”.

The fact of the matter is that Curley, Sr was not “unlucky in life’s lottery”. That term was introduced by Democratic Congressman Richard Gephardt, AKA “Howdy Doody”. Curley, Sr. tried a few things in business that didn’t work. He kept trying. The ones that did enabled him to raise his family in a very large house. . All his children   went to private schools, including the posh, elitist, of course Whites only, Auchmere Academy. It was known then as Delaware’s answer to D.C’s Sidwell-Friends. I can’t get independent confirmation that he was called “Cheese Dick” by his classmates. If I do I will pass it on.

The only “blue collar” that Curley wore was from Brooks Brothers.

Churchill said if he could have but one book it would be Bartlett’s.
John F. Kennedy cribbed from Arthur Schlesinger, Jr.
Obama cribbed from Deval Patrick.
Mrs. Obama cribbed from Saul Alinsky.

All liberals, especially modern American ones, share one trait. Gavin MacInnes says that deep down,” they know that they are full of shit”. That’s why the Vice President and the former Secretary of State are lying sacks of foetid eel shit.

And you won’t find that in Orwell either.


Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET


PS – If we ever find the phantom “lock box”, the one made famous by VP Alpha Gump, will it hold the answer to which comes first? The Summer of Recovery, Godot, or the autumnal equinox? And how is that Hope and Change ca-ca working out? Modern American Liberals loooove Public schools with one tiny exception. Their kids don’t go there. Their kids, kids like the Obamas and the Gores, go to the $60,000+ Sidwell-Friends School. Some tenants of public housing have that option. Most don’t.  Add hypocrisy to the Bill of Particulars.






July 17, 2016
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
Berger Singerman
350 Las Olas Blvd.
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301

RE: Some comments on your egregiously imbecilic mini OP-ED in today’s Sun Sentinel

Mr. Berger,

“I am a member of the Democratic platform committee and 
had some involvement in the energy and environment plank.”
The Sun Sentinel
Today
You

Pray tell, sir, but is that long hand for “I am a moron”?

For any fan of the Trivium, for any believer in the scientific method, for any person who believes that there is a difference between feelings and ideas,  a difference that would require 7 League Boots on steroids to span, for anyone who knows that while science is “settled” shouldn’t we keep looking for Ptolemy and Hoyle, for anyone who dares to utter the heretical words “Prove it” when confronted by “Trousered Apes” who revel in GCGWCCCD, your return to the arena where “Ideas Have Consequences” is most welcome. It is like an overload of mental Viagra

“I have watched my party evolve…”
op cit 

Does this “evolution” include acknowledging that Andrew Jackson, a Democratic President and a favorite of Arthur Schlesinger, Jr, made Redskin killing an acceptable group activity?
Does this “evolution” include acknowledging that the Democratic Party and the New York Times called Abraham Lincoln, a Republican “.President, a “baboon?
Does this “evolution” include acknowledging the fact that all the Jim Crow laws came about because of Democrat insistence?
Does this “evolution” acknowledge the vile bigotry and strident racism of T. Woodrow Wilson, a Democratic President?
Does this “evolution” acknowledge the fact that Wilson was the first of 3 Democratic Presidents in 48 years -1916, 1940, 1964 – to promise not to “send American boys to fight in foreign wars”?
Does this “evolution” acknowledge the bilious public displays of racism by Vice President Garner, by VP wanabee Sparkman, by Senator Bilbo, by Senator Stennis, by Senator Eastland, by Senator Smathers, by Senator Gore, by Senator Ervin? This is but a partial list but would you believe that they all, every last one of them, are Democrats?


“It is now up to us to embrace the future”
op cit

God’s Holy Trousers but if you actually said that please, please don’t operate heavy equipment or handle sharp objects. Does someone have your power of attorney?

-“Hope and change” had an 8 year run. How is that working out? Of course we must “embrace the future”. What better inanity for mush brained, neddy dunces, people like you, who pledge allegiance to the gravity defying principles of modern American Liberalism. After all, “it’s for the children”, isn’t it?

Please tell me you had a vasectomy. If you haven’t I’ll help pay for it. Shouldn’t that be on Page 1 of Obamacare?

Some housekeeping items:

#1 – Is this the year the Summer of Recovery arrives?
#2 – Have you insisted that associates must use public transit?
#3 – Have you stopped representing either side in waterfront transactions?
#4 – Have you turned off all the A/Cs in your office to undrown the polar bears?




Kevin Smith


PS – GCGWCCCD? GlobalCoolingGlobalWarmingClimateChangeClimateDestruction.

That’s the chronological chart of the “settled science” as presented by the charlatans and grifters who piss on the backs of the people and tell them it’s rain, you ohmadahn .I will cherish your continuous conflation of causation and correlation as if no one is watching.

Thursday, July 7, 2016

July 5, 2016
Mayor Philip Levine
1700 Convention Center Drive
Miami Beach, FL 33139

Mr. Mayor, 

Up until the part when you said that Mrs. Clinton was “happy” to meet with the FBI you were conducting yourself like a good modern American Liberal lap dog. You never let facts interfere with your superbly scripted, talking points only, interview on the Maria Bartiromo show this morning.

That single line put you in early contention for the highly coveted award of

SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR.

I can tell you from up close and personal experience that no one is ever “happy” to be on the receiving end of any questions asked by any government agency, particularly when you are under oath and the man on the other side of the table is not smiling.

Then you said that she “got” things done.

Shall we count the ways? OK, OK, just some of them.

Did you mean her successful uncovering of the “vast Right-Wing conspiracy”?
Did you mean her total support of the Defense of Marriage Act? 
How about that magical “reset” moment with the Russkie ambassador?
Her serpentine evasion of Serbian mortar shells in Bosnia?
Her daughter’s miraculous escape from death at the hands of Islamic terrorists on 9/11/01?
Her telling the mother of a dead American diplomat that she would “get” the murderer?
Her world class talent to cackle like a crazed bruja or bark like a bitch whelp in estrus? 

You used Yiddish terms on TV this morning. Maybe you can get some pictures of Hillary’s grandson’s briss. I can’t get any info on it. Assuming he had it done, it would be a true Summer of Recovery for the mohel, right?

One more thing.

I have read Michele Obama’s senior thesis on Black pulchritude in America. If she had not mastered tautologies she would have no thinking capacity at all. Martin Luther King’s dissertation at least had the benefit of having some great speeches in it. Bill Cosby’s work is unreadable. Dip it in lemon juice, nuke it in the microwave, and hold it up to the mirror and it still makes no sense. At the very least copies were available. 

Hillary Clinton, nee Rodham, wrote about Saul Alinsky, the noted community activist. You could get a pulled pork sandwich, some cold lobster, and 6 well iced Blue Points or Chincoteagues at the new grandson’s briss before you could read about her and Solly.

Can you get me a copy?

I saw you on “This Week in South Florida”, the Sunday morning talk show hosted superbly well by Michael Putney. You talk about how you are able to fight the rising sea levels, a phenomenon caused by polar bear drowning fossil fuel burning, by the use of super pumps. [Aren’t the vile Koch Brothers behind it?] Let me ask the question yet again. You and your employees have not answered my question.

Where does the water go?

If you pump it East it will come back quicker than you can get rid of it. Same with pumping it North. If you pump it South you are going to have a lot of pissed-off citizens of Homestead yelling at you. If you pump it West into Biscayne Bay may I see a copy of the environmental impact statement you filed? Will these super pumps adversely affect the manatees? We know that everything always adversely affects the manatees  [Can I announce my support of Darwin and the survival of the fittest and suggest it’s time for these useless sea slugs to go?] If guilty 1 %ers, mostly White, didn’t throw week old arugula at them they would starve so do you have plans to house the homeless manatees and retrain them?

Where the Hell does the water go?

Maybe you should ask Hillary. She “gets things done”, right?


Kevin Smith




PS – One more, one more last thing. Is it ISIS or is it ISIL? Which one is the JV? 

Monday, July 4, 2016

July 3, 2016

Senator Eleanor Sobel
2600 Hollywood Blvd.
Hollywood, FL 33020

Senator Sobel,

“Teaching is a profession, and teachers
Should be treated as professionals.”
The Sun Sentinel
Today
You

It would be like pole-axing a baby seal if I were to point out that no other profession, none whatsoever, takes July and August off from the swift completion of their appointed tasks. Plumbers, jet pilots, dermatologists, lawyers, hookers, ZIKA inspectors, loan sharks, community activists, saloon keepers, undertakers, beer salesmen, disc jockeys, politicians, literate curmudgeons, and columnists have to face the vagaries of a 12 month work schedule. Therefore I shan’t do it.
Here’s one way to make the profession better and more rewarding.
Napoleon would pick 3 poilus before a battle and charge them with cowardice. He would court-martial them, find them guilty, and execute them.   He said it “encouraged the others”. Try that in a “failing” school. After all, “it’s for the children”, isn’t it?

“Nuclear” Jack Welch, “Chainsaw” Al Neuarth, and Abraham Lincoln were professionals who did what they had to do to advance their agenda. In the case of Lincoln it took him 3 years and much blood before he found the right generals. When he did he repealed the Dred Scott decision.

The Sun Sentinel, having just emerged from bankruptcy, and faced with a hostile takeover, will shortly begin the practice of journalistic defenestration. The bleeding hearts will soon enter the world “where stones are hard and water is wet”. It is a world where professionals endure, prevail, and prosper. Or they don’t. It’s why score is kept. It’s why no Super Bowl will ever end in a scoreless tie.

Meantime here is another suggestion. 

Ulysses S. Grant said the best way to get rid of a bad law was to enforce it. Here’s my plan. All elected members of any governing body anywhere in Florida plus any government employee who earns a living in the educational morass must, with no exceptions, have all his children enrolled in the nearest public school. 

Watch how quickly the needle turns up.



Kevin Smith

Sunday, July 3, 2016




July 1, 2016 
Maybe she’s right
Maybe it is time to “move on”.
At this point, “what difference does it make?”
Bear with me, por favor
Just a few questions before I go.
#1 – Did the video saying that Allah ain’t so Akbar cause the slaughter at Benghazi or was it a deliberate attack by non-moderate, non-peace loving Muslims?
#2 – The ambassador was a homosexual. His death was particularly gruesome, a la Matthew Shepherd and Jesse Dirkhising. Does that make it a hate crime?
#3 – Did you tell the mother of a murdered American, as you stood by his flag draped coffin,  that his death was caused by a video? Further, did you tell her that you would “get” the maker? You “got” him.
What crime was he charged with? Is he still in jail?
#4 – Maureen Dowd said of Cindy Sheehan –you remember, don’t you? – that a “mother who loses a child has absolute moral authority”. Was that an absolute universal truth or does it only apply when modern American Liberals use it “eclectically” to flog non-believers?
#5 - I hope Chelsea and the baby are doing well. Considering that she was able to dodge bodies falling from the WTC on 9/11 and incoming mortar shells in Bosnia I hope her good luck continues.  How was the briss?
#6 - What will you do differently than Obama to aid the economy?
#7 – Do you have to be in bed to lie straight?
#8 – You say tomayto I say tomahto. Is it SIS or ISIL? And what the Hell is the difference? Does it have something, anything, to do with the difference between radical Islamist terrorism, Radical Swedish Lutheran terrorism or, heaven forefend, radical Tea Party terrorism?
#9 – Are copies of the certified financial statements of the Clinton slush fund available without a court order?
#10 – What do you think they were talking about on the plane?

In anticipation of the courtesy of a quick reply, I remain



`

Kevin Smith