Gary Stein The Sun-Sentinel

June 1, 2011

Gary Stein
The Sun-Sentinel
200 E Las Olas Blvd
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301

RE: That’s the trouble with elections. Anyone can vote. Anyone can win. Yikes!

Big Stein,

With the same scientific method that was used to prove GlobalCoolingGlobal WarmingClimateChange beyond any reasonable doubt I can say, Caesar dixit if you will, that FOX-IT IS is both caused and cured by TU QUOQUEOSIS.

Begin with a simple premise:

If Sarah Palin is as fill in the blank as you and your coven members think she is wouldn’t it be in the best interests of modern American Liberalism to see that she gets the Republican nomination for President?

Despite shutting down Camp Gitmo on the way back from his inauguration, despite having convinced Europe that Rambo and Maverick were banished, despite having campaigned against deficit financing before increasing it 4 times, despite enduring a winter of discontent that so far has not led us to the summer[s] of recovery, despite causing the oceans to recede – Jeepers! He’s done a lot, hasn’t he? Do you think we really need an election?

As an American I am very proud that the legendary RESET button has given us one great triumph in foreign policy. Giving head WOG Bin Laden a 3rd eye will rank with the Berlin Wall coming down.

Whatever her academic and intellectual failings, and God knows that only Allah can weave a perfect rug [Pretty neat, don’t you think? Getting God and Allah into the same sentence] I will accept all wagers that she has known for a long time that there are only 50 states in the Union.

Ditto that Austrian is not spoken in Austria.

I too have trouble when someone is called a Nazi.

Of course, the exception that proves the rule is when Senator Richard “Little Dick” Durbin [D-IL] uses the term on the floor of the Unites States Senate. Also Bush is Hitler gets a pass because his father blew up the World Trade Center to get the gas pipeline across Kafiristan, remember? Who can forget Darth Cheney bringing back the lost art of Bayoneting Babies? Not me.

Of course, if Lord Barack the Beneficent and Hitler are mentioned in the same zip code modern American Liberal knickers get knotted. [Would unknotting them be an example of “kinetic” tailoring?]

If Big Ed Schultz, and how about using his picture in the new dictionary category of “putz”? can call Laura Ingraham, a breast cancer survivor and a single mom of two, a slut, if radio talk dude Mike Malloy can ask for Seal Team 6 to “double tap” George W. Bush before strangling Rush Limbaugh, and they go uncondemned in the Sun-Sentinel then perhaps it’s time for a refresher course in “eclectic indignation”.

As a wanabee righteous Gentile I say that if Obama is good for Israel Colonel Sanders is great for chickens.

In 1993 Bernie Nussbaum was described by the Clinton White House as a “New York lawyer”. Imagine if any Bush White House had said that. Imagine if Pat Buchanan had said that. By the way Nussbaum worked for Clinton. I know several “New York lawyers”. Several of my best friends are “New York lawyers”. Some of them are “stiff necked”. Is that a “blood libel”?

Alan Dershowitz, a “New York lawyer” from Brooklyn, is cool with the term “blood libel” being used by “non-New York lawyers”. I’ll stop there because I don’t want to cause a family feud.

If “Sarah Who’s neighborhood” is one step short of the “undiscovered country” from which no politician ever returns why are the shock troops of modern American Liberalism training their big guns on her?

You would almost think she was Nixon incarnate.

Forget about one hand clapping; methinks I hear the sounds of sphincters snapping shut.




Kevin Smith