February 14, 2014
Stephen L. Goldstein
The Sun Sentinel

RE: How the Radical Right has caused Global Cooling, Global Warming, teenage obesity, a law mandating that every family has 2 bazookas, and the possibility that they may sweep all modern American Liberals out of the Senate this fall. Some comments on your column in today’s Sun sentinel on how the Koch Brothers will turn us all into serfs.

My dear Professor,

I have been away from my duties far too long. Lord knows but I have missed your insipid inanities for far too long. I have some questions for you.

#1 – If you stumble upon 2 sacks filled with cash how can you tell which sack is from the evil Koch Brothers and which sack is from the beneficent George Soros? Say what you will about Soros we can all agree on one thing about him. He can surely tell the buttered side from the dry. After working for the Nazis for 2 years he was able to take his hard earned concentration camp skills and go to work for the Communists. He was, as Hinnisey the Publican used to say, “A man who saw his opportunities and took’em”.

#2 – Should the Republicans control both Houses of Congress they will not impeach President B.O. His conviction would make Curley [named after the smartest Stooge] Biden the President. He is so Goddamn ginormously dumb that he thinks manual labor is the trabajador who mows his lawn.

#3 – If the Governor and the Legislature “continue their efforts to deny citizens the right to vote” why don’t they start with you? Maybe the IRS could give you and your co-conspirators a colonic lavage that would remove your tonsils. Your political life would be proctologized in such a way that you would long for Elba.

#4 – Maybe you could help me with Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz. She no longer returns my calls.

Is she lying about what the Israeli Ambassador said to her or is the Israeli Ambassador lying about what he says he said to her. Both can’t be telling the truth. I would like to know.

Also, either she is for increased sanctions against Iran or she is opposed to them. When she is in Broward County she sounds as if she would like to lead a wing of B-52s into Teheran. When she is in Washington she sounds like Neville Chamberlain. What does she sound like when she is flying over South Carolina? I know that plaid is the favorite color of modern American Liberals but if anyone knows what she really thinks I would like to know.
#5 – Since you are about to be overcome with a case of terminal vapors and screaming heeby-jeebies should the Republicans take the Senate why don’t you suggest to President B.O. AKA El Supremo to his brown shirt thugs, that he shut congress down? By his use of executive orders he has shown that Congress is about as useful as teats on a bull. Shut it down and use the money to pay for advanced Obamacare.

Don’t you love it when a plan comes together?



Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET