May 5, 2015

“FREE MEN SPEAK WITH FREE TONGUES”

The 25 century old breach between Antigone and

Marcel Duchamp has been closed.

Also, a crowd funding plea for a really bang-up

Fourth of July celebration.

King Creon told Antigone that she could not bury her brother. She did. The King killed her.

Marcel Duchamp had an exhibit in Paris 100+ years ago featuring his latest work “Nude Descending a Staircase”. Parisians rioted, not because their sensibilities were outraged by the sight of Frog ta-tas and Gallic yoo-has, but because there weren’t any. Google up the picture to see why they did what they did.

The gap was closed last Sunday in Garland, Texas.

If Allah is so friggin’ Akbar what difference does it make what his main man, his go to guy, Muhammed, looks like?  There were no cameras 14 centuries ago when he was busy eye-balling pre-pubescent teen age girls and/or goats. Maybe he looks like Omar Sharif. Maybe he looks like Yasser Arafat. Maybe he looks like the Elephant Man. Brad Pitt? Ru Paul? Yogi Berra? Al Sharpton?  Bruce Jenner? Bruja Jenner? Dorian Gray? Dr. Jekyll? Mister Hyde? 

Nobody knows.

If I draw a picture of a somewhat Semitic man with a face that would stop a clock and say it is my Uncle Baba Ganoosh a gazillion Muslims would say Oy! or the  Sunni/Shia equivalent. If I say it is MoMo, the mover of mountains and the bane of G-spots, they go from being wanabee feral Muslim thugs to becoming real life feral Muslim thugs who Kill the Infidels, preferably by cutting their heads off or blowing them up. Hijacking a plane and flying it into a skyscraper remains a viable option.

13 centuries after Jesus Christ, and Blessed be His name, The Divine Comedy was published. Dante tore his church apart. He and Petrarch were the first 2 artists in a phenomenon of Western Civilization called the Renaissance. Alas, 10 centuries ago, Islam turned inward. They began to eat their own seed corn. 10 centuries of forbidden DNA transfers has produced a culture where rage rules.

 Crucify Christians. Burn prisoners. Hang homosexuals. Flog women. All done to please Allah and his prophet. 

Somebody sure has some sense of humor.

Does the Medina Symphony feature Mozart or Stravinsky? Has the Dance theatre of Harlem been to Riyadh? Has the Fertile Crescent produced an Islamic Shakespeare? How about a James Joyce? Has a Muslim Samuel Johnson or a burnoosed Edmund Burke been hidden? Where is the Martin Luther of the desert? Any Walt Disneys at the next oasis? Andrew Carnegie? Bill Gates? Clarence Birdseye? Jonas Salk? Abdul Einstein?

You won’t have to take your socks off to count the number of Muslim Nobel Prize winners in the last century.

Speech is either free or it isn’t.

You are either pregnant or you’re not.

The tumor is either malignant or it isn’t.

The killing of those 2 thugs on Sunday proves a few things”

#1 – The express road to 72 virgins begins and ends in Texas.

#2 – If you tell me you want to kill my family do not expect to be welcomed.

#3 – The West, when enraged, will put paid on all those open bills.

#4 - The Southern Poverty Law Center did not approve this message.

#5 – Pam Geller, please come and bring your flame thrower

But wait. There’s more. 

My crowd-fund appeal is simple.

I want to have a demonstration on the steps of the nearest Federal Court House  in Fort Lauderdale, FL at noon on July 4^th, 2015.

I have picked Fort Lauderdale for one obvious reason. Broward County is Ground Zero for the antinomianilistic Nihilists known as modern American Liberals. These vipers are in favor of manatee suffrage, 4^th and  5^th trimester abortion, and banning Rush Limbaugh. Because of his progressive views on abortion Dr. Mengele would any Democratic primary he ran in.

 They also hectored me about “Piss Christ” and why I had to support it. “Piss Christ”, by Andres Serrano, is a clear container in which a crucifix is suspended. It is them filled with, you guessed it. Piss. I was told that the artist’s rights trumped mine and that it was the price we pay for an open society. They also told me that I had to acquiesce in the taxpayer supported “Corpus Crista”. It is a play whose premise is simple: Jesus Christ was crucified because of a lovers’ quarrel with Judas Iscariot. Judas, feeling betrayed, dropped a dime on the late and great JC and the Romans did the rest. 

I was told that nothing can come between the artist and his artistic expression. If I objected I would be consigned to the knuckle dragging Troglodyte dungeon from which no escape was possible

Besides, it was only a play and I should get over it.

Preliminary plans call for the American flag to be burned. No problem there, right? I will wrap a bible in the flag. Still no problem. I will also wrap a Koran in the flag. [As an aside, why is it always the “sacred” Koran? Why can’t the bible be “sacred”? Just asking.]

Further, I will have a gallon of pork piss nearby in case the fire gets out of control.

I need funds for suitable adult libations. No sense risking dehydration while doing the Lord’s work. I need funds for a getaway car. I need funds for bail. I need funds for legal and medical services. Since I am from Bayonne, NJ I will need street money. 

I will be easy to spot

I am a somewhat calorically challenged handsome bearded curmudgeon with a gimpy gait. I may be wearing an eye patch. I keep 2 hats handy. The oldest one, the bearing the title “Right-Wing Conspirator”, was worn by me in front of the white House in 1998. I shook my fist while shouting “Come Out with your hands up, you son of a Bitch. We have the Place Surrounded”.  Alas, he got away. 

The newer one, the one that says “Proud Global Warmer”, is used when I come across people who confuse correlation with causation and believe that tautologies are a really cool way to avoid thinking.

Whichever hat I wear, whichever way I choose to express myself, I will be exercising a right that is mine when I was born. I got it, not from the local magistrate, but “from beyond the stars”. And can someone bring me the latest Arabic translation of “A Modest Proposal”?

Nobody asked me but Hillary’s Ass is now an axe handle and a half wide. She needs a quart of industrial strength of WD40 it get her drawers on and the Jaws of Life to get them off. When she hauls ass it takes two trips with the last one in a wheelbarrow. She switched from Botox to Crème Brule because it is organic and it decreases her carbon footprint. Plus, it’s the only way she can get Handsome Billy to lick her.

FREE MEN STILL SPEAK WITH FREE TONGUES, RIGHT?

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET