Congressgal Debbie Wasserman-Schultz

May 21, 2011

Congressgal Debbie Wasserman-Schultz
Democratic National Committee
430 S. Capitol Street NE
Washington, DC 20003

RE: Thinking of you and the undoing of “a stiff necked people”

Congressperson Little Debbie,

It’s been good week [so far] and a bad week [so far]

I passed a kidney stone which was good news because I then was able to avoid the dreaded Death Panels of ObamaCare. Speaking of ObamaCare, how has your campaign to make ObamaCare into a hate word been going? Yet “Go ObamaCare yourself” is still better than the Wisconsin Democratic legislator who told his Republican counterpart that “she was fucking dead”.

I was a bit groggy when I saw you pitching some new synthetic polar bear friendly fuel. Not being sure whether it was made from manatee eructations with all the manatees being range fed and kept free of hormones, pesticides, herbicides, and rubella inoculations or from recycled tofu fistulas I went to your website to get some follow-up info. Alas, none was to be found.

What I did find has caused me to issue a public apology.

For years I have been bothered by your claim to have two degrees in Political Science. How, with those academic credentials, I asked, could you not be aware of the last 25 centuries of Western Civilization? Greece, the agora, Rome, England, Runnymede, Philadelphia? It was as if they never existed. Our rights, “rights that were ours from beyond the stars”, were never given their proper respect. Your oft-stated belief that only good government could make people good was and is bizarre. What else would explain your public endorsement of lower case Fascism?

The answer was hiding in plain sight.

Your website now says that your academic concentration was in Political Campaigning. I guess, to paraphrase one of my favorite politicians, “Cactus Jack” Garner, “that’s better than a bucket of warm spit”. It’s almost as good as being the 3rd or 4th largest land fill in Broward County.

I now realize that all my appeals to reason, said appeals being buttressed by references to History, and Heaven forefend! Political Science, were like casting pearls before swine

That’s a fancy way of saying you were clueless

Your peroration on energy appears to be a paean to super ethanol.

You show how simple a segue it is from being clueless to being a HORSE’S ASS. As the prototypical modern American Liberal the Law of Unintended Consequences has no meaning for you.

Listen up. I’ll type slowly. And, now that I am aware of your academic deficiencies, verrrry sloooowly.

Ethanol, be it economy, industrial strength, premium, or super intergalactic premium is made from corn.

From my time as a missionary in rural Mexico I assure you that corn is the staple of 3rd World existence.

In the United States of America the main use was feeding hogs.

In the United States of Mexico the main use was feeding the people.

Only in the world of modern American Liberalism, a world that you are entranced by and speak for, would taking food from the mouths of non-White people be looked on as something good. In the muddled brains of mALs, a world that equate feelings with ideas, the psychic balance sheet of how many Brown or Black babies are worth one polar bear is always open ended. That every truck load of corn that goes to an Ethanol plant causes someone to die there can be no dispute.

Only wealthy people, mostly White 1st Worlders, can afford to be environmentalists. A huge number of people still are ruled by the Hogarthian dictum that life is “nasty, poor, brutish, and short”. [If only the successes of the Obama Shovel Ready Stimulus Plan and its underappreciated spawn, the legendary Summer of Recovery, were universally available! If only rain water was beer! If only men were angels!]

While no one was looking the price of corn doubled. That matters not one whit to the makers of Ethanol. The reason is simple: They enjoy subsidies that Big Oil can only dream of. The use of corn for fuel, a use where price is not a factor, has caused the price to skyrocket. Having confused correlation with causation you have entered into a nonsensical – I wish it were Quixotic - crusade that puts the interests of the struggling snail darter and the valiant furbish lousewort above the needs of the most endangered species. The most endangered species being, of course, man.

Why should evil profit mongers care about the dietary deficiencies of Jose or Abdul? Since they are lionized by charlatans such as you they don’t care about the “collateral damage”.


If you think the Arab Spring has come about because Cicero has suddenly come into vogue you would be mistaken. If you think the Arab states have decided that they want to try Jeffersonian Democracy think again. If you think that a Parliamentary Democracy is close at hand in the Fertile Crescent think again.

They’re pissed off because they can’t afford to feed themselves. They live in a society that has no political escape valve. Political criticism is met with gunfire. After they blame Israel and the United States they still can’t feed themselves. Maybe Allah ain’t so Akbar after all. Lacking the tap root of free men governing themselves they can only roar at each other when they can’t feed their children.

Better we power our cars with windmills.

Just one more question.

3 years ago I heard you and your truly despicable pal, former Congressman “Toad” Wexler, preaching in assorted shuls, shivas, Mah-Jongg tournaments, and pre-Tea Party kvetching sessions that Obama would be good for Israel.

Maybe your devotion to synthetic fuels and keeping Mt. Kilimanjaro snow covered prevented you from seeing what he just did to Israel.

If Obama is good for the Jews Colonel Sanders is great for chickens. Obama is as big a liar as you were/are a fool.

I would be remiss if I failed to point out that the President used the term “Teutonic shift” during his lecture to the State Department about Israel. The ring tone on all White House issued cell phones has been changed from Berlin tunes – Irving, not the city - to the Best of Wagner. I thought he was humming the Horst Wessel anthem as he described the “slippery slope” he was putting our ally on. All he needs is a Brown shirt.

When dining with the Devil it is best to have a long spoon. As a righteous Gentile I would trust those WOGs about as far as I could throw the final version of ObamaCare. Since I am still within the octave of passing a kidney stone I couldn’t even lift that 12 stone tree eater.

Maybe W wasn’t quite as bad as he was made out to be. He certainly kept faith with Israel. His successor looks like he wants to be the engineer on the next Auschwitz express.



Kevin Smith