August 2, 2015

Letter to the Editor

The Miami Herald

3511 NW 91^st Street

Miami, FL33172

RE: “Ground Zero for Climate Change” – Some comments on your editorial about how we have so little time before it all comes crashing down on us and, just as important, what to while waiting for the end.

Sirs, 

I was guest on several occasions at the old world HQ of the Miami Herald. That was when your crystal tower was right smack on Biscayne Bay. There were rumors, unconfirmed mind you that the editorial board handled dissent by trussing up the heretics and opening the back door to fling them into the bay. Just like the way the Romans handled the Carthaginians or Salem handled the witches. 

I mention that because your real estate transaction refutes the claim that modern American Liberals, usually mush brained ohmadahns, cannot be hard driving ruthless businessmen, people who would give the Koch Brothers a run for their money when it comes to commercial chicanery.

I say that because even though you were aware that Biscayne Bay, fed by an inexorable rising sea, would soon engulf your building you managed to find a head up its ass 1%er to buy your property.

For that alone you get an instant pass into the Scrooge Hall of Fame.

Don’t tell Bernie Sanders. He’ll boycott your paper.

I mention this because since Boss Fiedler ran the hive I’ve been telling the Herald to turn off its A/Cs.

Follow the bouncing ball. I’ll type slowly.

Coal is burned to produce electricity to power A/Cs. With the exception of coal mined by Tom Steyer coal is “dirty” and kills polar bears. If you turn off your A/Cs you will save the polar bear and help “cool the earth and calm the seas”. [Baby seals may object to the rejuvenated bear population but everybody has to chip in if we are to save the world, right? Besides, the bears don’t do what anything different than what Planned Parenthood does, right?

I suggest that you split the savings on your FPL bill with your employees.

Does ObamaCare cover air freshener  and deodorant implants?

Don’t you love it when a plan comes together?

Kevin Smith