March 9, 2014
Carl Hiaasen
The Miami Herald
3511 NW 91st Street
Miami, FL 33172

RE: tu quoque rears its ugly head again. Some comments on your column in today’s Miami Herald about Florida’s attempt to execute a mentally defective rapist/murderer.

Mr. Hiaasen,

A case should have been made that Freddie Lee Hall did not understand the charges against him. Further, since he could not understand the charges against him he could not aid in his defence.

A quick read of the Constitution should make grown men weep.

This dumb thug seems to be enmeshed in a bureaucratic briar patch so typical of government. Any government. The Post Office, the IRS, the DMV, and now Obamacare. There may be a pattern emerging here.

tu quoque may be an ancient synonym for “here comes the other shoe”.

Ricky Ray Rector. Remember him?

Everybody remembers Matthew Shepherd. Nobody remembers Jesse Dirkhising. We are a lesser people for that.

Thank God for Google.

I have been told by highly placed Razorback sources – sources that must remain confidential – that Hillary R. Clinton told the warden that she would give Triple R a lap dance if that is what it would take to get him to sit still in the Arkansas version of “Old Sparky”.

Ricky Ray Rector was a truly evil dude. After robbing, raping, and murdering he was cornered by Arkansas policemen. It is not known if he shouted that he would not be taken alive. It is known that after he killed one policeman he shot himself in the head.

He didn’t kill himself. The bullet blew enough of his brains out to make him either a moronic imbecile or an imbecilic moron. Either way he could neither understand the charges against him nor could he assist in his defense.

Arkansas tried him, convicted him, and sentenced him to die in the electric chair.

Governor Handsome Billy from Hot Springs wanted to take his randy romping raree to Washington, DC. One of the ways a modern American Liberal Democrat – Did I just repeat myself? – can show he is “tough on crime” is to execute a really bad guy.

That’s where Hillary came in.

She would have keelhauled him if that was what it took for her to get to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. She would have given him a lap dance to keep him still in the chair as he was strapped in.

Franz Kafka? Billy Budd? Some Swift. Seasoned by Mel Brooks. Soon to be filmed by the Coen Brothers.

Sometimes you roll a 7.

If Freddie Lee Hill and why do I just know that he is a non-Caucasian can hold out to 2016 maybe Candidate Clinton can give him one last smile.



Kevin Smith


PS – Say a prayer for Jesse Dirkhising