April 16, 2017

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Welcome Back!

Big Stein:

First, congratulations on escaping the clutches of the Koch Brothers-funded Somali pirates. Did you go over the wall a la Churchill or did the Sun Sentinel pay the ransom, the dhimmi? Either way, you’re out and I am happy.

Your absence filled me with inestimable sorrow. Since Little Stevie Goldstein got the boot I have relied on you to give me the latest head up your ass modern American mantra, chazzerai like “never bring a knife to a gun fight”, or “if you like your doctor you can keep him”, or “cross my red line and you’re toast”? Who can forget the discovery of an additional 7 or 8 states? I can’t. I nurture my bonsai plants by playing President B.O. promising to “calm the seas and cool the earth”.  I used to live in Sea Bright, NJ. Imagine how bad it would have been with Super Storm Sandy if he hadn’t “calmed the seas”.

When I asked about “paying the ransom” I am referring to the first great low light and low life of American History; John Adams. As difficult as it would seem to be he topped the Alien & Sedition Acts by agreeing to pay 20%, 1/5^th, of America’s operating budget to, and I hate to profile, radical Islamic terrorists, AKA the Barbary Pirates. [Additional History lessons about “Leathernecks” or “Do  you seek the protection of the American flag?” That was 220 years ago and some things never change, do they? A parting word about Adams the Elder. Since Prozac and Thorazine were not yet available it is obvious that he should have been packed in ice every night. Maybe he could freeze the demons to death, the ones that came in one ear and ran across his brain and out the other.

Here is my question about your column today.

I know, as the poet said, that “after the first death there are no others”. You may wish to consult Little Stein, your perpetual college student, about that. Y0ur column states that “Hitler exterminated 6,000,000 Jews. If the SEC looked at that statement, the 10b5 alarm bell would be ringing. That’s the section that covers fraud, both civil and criminal. Fraud can be committed by a commission or omission. The number of people who were non-combatants totaled 12,000,000.

Would it make me a racist anti-Semitic homophobe to suggest that the last 6,000,000 are as dead as the first 6,000,000? That’s a risk I accept.

In for a pence, in for a pound.

A bit further along in your column you say “the world has never seen an evil like Hitler”. From a subjective point of view, you may be right. From an objective point of view, he was way down the list. 

Stalin killed at least 5,000,000 Kulaks. That is the classic example of a euphemism. When Bernie Nussbaum cleaned out Vince Foster’s office after he ate his gun he was called a “New York lawyer”. Having employed a lot of them in my other life in my other life I know what that means. Send a SASE if you don’t know. Kulak means in early ‘30s Cyrillic/Russian jargon “Jew”. Vide Walter Duranty. Stalin did in 30,000,000 people. Compared to that number Hitler was a jaywalker.

Mao did in 60,000,000 gomers and slopes. That’s 10 times the number of Jews killed by Hitler. He made Hitler look like an odd-lotter.

“Attention must be paid” – Ask Student Stein – to Pol Pot. He took out 1/3^rd of his country. That’s an amount worthy of notice, worthy of being mentioned in dispatches.

Anyway, I’m glad you’re back. A non-denominational Pesach and Easter greeting to you.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET