April 26, 2017

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel

Big Stein,

A Christian mitzvah is about to descend on you. I don’t want you out there, totally unprepared, when, to quote Senator Summer Winter Fall Warren, AKA Liawatha, the “poop” hits the fan. Senator Warren, the paradigmatic template of forked tongue hypocritical modern American Liberals – Did I just repeat myself? – now pitches her tent in Harvard Square where she can better give drunken Redskins a good name.

That’s why I want you to be ready, to have mucho arrows in your ideological quiver, the ones that enable you to slay the shibboleths sure to come with the new Trump tax plan.

Like the homophobic Boy Scouts of old used to say to little old ladies, “Be prepared”.

“It is a patriot’s duty to arrange his affairs in such 

a manner that he pays the least amount of taxes

possible. At best, taxation is an enforced exactitude,

not a voluntary contribution.”

Who said that?

What was the context?

Get smart right quick about such deadly, dull things as Subchapter ‘S’ corporations, about accelerated depreciation, about the difference between a tax deduction and a tax credit, about debits and credits. Stuff like that.

Resist the temptation to babble on about Clinton’s balanced budget and his surplus. In the vernacular, “It sounds like bullshit to me”. 

When the construction of a Nimitz-class carrier and Midnight Basketball are treated the same on the Federal balance sheet, when the co-mingling of Social Security funds didn’t cause Treasury SWAT teams to arrest everybody involved – Here’s another Pop Quiz. Why weren’t the Clinton surpluses used to pay down the national debt? It wasn’t. Not by a thin dime or a red cent – when contingent liabilities become 4 letter words, when the vaunted “lock box”, the one that everyone fought about 17 years ago, was last seen trying to catch the Pioneer Space Probe, it may be time to reach for a stun grenade.

If the Sun Sentinel ran their books the way the Feds run theirs your formerly bankrupt company would disappear a la Solyndra.

Don’t let anyone bamboozle you with the typical modern American Liberal flapdoodle, nit-wit balderdash about tax cuts having to pay for themselves, or they have to be revenue neutral, or they have to disproportionately help those with little or no income, the folks that Congressman Gephardt, Howdy-Doody to his BFF, said were “unlucky in life’s lottery”. God’s Holy Trousers, but how do you cut taxes on someone who has no tax liability?

“Even the Devil can quote scripture” so I hope you don’t mind if I cite the great Lord Keynes. Alas, he is a man more quoted than read. In addition to predicting World War 2 in 1920 and running a successful hedge fund, his constant advice was for the central bank to buy government bonds, cut taxes, and “loosen the animal spirits”.

I am going to let you in on a little secret.

Rich people hire poor people for 2 reasons:

#1 – They want to stay rich.

#2 – They want to get richer.

Poor people work for rich people for 2 reasons:

#1 – They like eating.

#2 – They want to be rich, like the people who hire them.

Any government policy that advances these things is good. Any government policy that impedes them is bad.

Any fool who believes that raising taxes, raising barriers to job creation, raising the minimum wage [And yes, I have worked for the minimum wage and was fired from the job because, as the manager said, “Business sucked”. I wanted to be unemployed at a higher minimum wage but I couldn’t swing the deal.] should not be allowed to operate heavy equipment. Of course, “twisting truth to make to make a trap for fools” may be the only career path open to them. MSNBC is “the last refuge for these scoundrels”.

Now that modern American Liberals have taken to re-hab John Calhoun and his Theory of Nullification, the theory that said it was OK for a state to allow slavery because they “nullified” any Federal law that challenged it, I have 2 things to share with you.

While checking on my manatee traps early this AM, I heard a train whistle for almost 3 minutes as it was heading South. I am sure it woke Bowser whose barking awakened little Herschel whose squeals disturbed any number of disabled senior citizens, folks like me. I was up anyway so it was no big deal. BTB, 4-month-old manatee sushi with a hint of Sriracha is to die for.

Pass a law banning train whistles after 10:00 PM. You won’t have to arrest more than 2 engineers for the rest of them to get the message.

The Feds may take umbrage at this, like they did in May, 2016. That was when Loretta Lynch, after getting the OK from Mr. Hillary Clinton, they guy who gave her her first big job in 1998, gave every school district in America 5 business day to comply with the Federal regulation about non-gender specific. She wanted toilet seats on urinals or she would stop all Federal funding for education. 

Thank God a Federal Judge put a stop to that.

OOOPS! Strike that. Nobody stopped Obama. The Judge stopped Trump. Go figure. I guess sauce for the goose is not necessarily sauce for the gander. Yet again, the beauty of modern American Liberal “eclectic indignation” is made manifest.

Maybe we should stick to jobs.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET