June 22, 2014

Howard Greenberg – Publisher
The Sun Sentinel
500 E Broward Blvd
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33394

RE: Have you seen Jac VerSteeg?

Mr. Greenberg,

Maybe the Somali pirates took him. [Picture enclosed of him, not them]

Don’t look for him in the Brad Pitt look-a-like contest.

Mugs like that give Zombies nightmares.

Have a few pusses like that walking around and the moribund Iron Mask industry will have a Summer of Recovery that will make economic Viagra History.

He was/is an opinion columnist for the Sun Sentinel. In fact, his 3rd signed opinion appears in today’s unlinkable paper.

I sent my opinion of his opinion – Surprise! – to the Sun Sentinel.

First you poleax Little Stevie, as in Professor Goldstein

Then you have phantom columnists.

In my other life I was CFO of a public company. I never did learn how to account for phantom employees. How do you do it?

It was returned “addressee unknown” – copies of my opinion and the envelope are enclosed.

His opinion today on legalizing medical marijuana says that Marvin Adelson, “a huge Republican donor”, a man obviously in a cabal with the perfidious Koch Brothers, a man who wants to see polar bears drown and children starve, is opposed to it because he wants to see Governor Scott re-elected.

He also says “Adelson makes mega-millions fleecing folks doomed by the laws of probability that ensure the House always wins”.

It should be obvious, even to mush-brained moronic modern American Liberals, a dunce like the maybe missing VerSteeg, that his observation applies exponentially to the Florida Lottery. Full disclosure requires me to tell you that I play xxx 4 or 5 times a year. It was my grandfather’s badge number.

Listen up. I’ll type slowly.

Adelson doesn’t cater to poor people.

When was the last time you saw an inner city single mom, usually a woman of color, with children in need of a good Ritalin program who, in addition to being too far away from Midnight Basketball are always being exploited by the cunning low prices of food and prescription drugs at Wal-Mart, being comped with a bottle of Cristal in the Black Chip room at the Sands.

They, victims of America’s longest war, the hugely successful War on Poverty, the one that just had its 50th anniversary, can be seen with the current hot Dream Book clutched to their bosoms in front of the Stop & Shop waiting for the 6:00 AM starting bell of the Florida Lotto machine.

Talk about the upturned neck awaiting the ax.

I guess it’s kind of OK because we know that the Florida Lottery, in the jabberwocky talk of modern American Liberalism, is for the children.

By the way, not only am I going to vote for the legalization of medical marijuana I am constantly advocating for heroin for cancer patients. And yes, I am going to vote for Governor Scott.

Would I be way out of line if one of my granddaughters used his picture in a show and tell featuring bi-peds weaned on dill pickles marinaded in warm lemon juice?

If you find Jac let me know. I’ll take down the yellow ribbon.




A Proud Global Warmer



Kevin Smith