Stephen L. Goldstein The Sun Sentinel

April 1, 2012
Stephen L. Goldstein
The Sun Sentinel

RE: A new profession in your golden years? Some comments on your column in today’s paper.

My dear Professor,

Have you ever thought what you would do if the Tribune reorganization fails and the Sun Sentinel is liquidated? How about if Rupert Murdoch buys it? I know you were a big time investor in Solyndra. Your 401K probably looks like a 101K.

For years, “The World’s Tallest Midget”, sometimes accompanied by “The World’s Smartest Bear” in non-rutting season, has made a good living going on tour like a rock star.

They played on the circuit that includes county fairs, bah humbug mitzvahs, tractor pulls, bachelorette parties, Midnight Basketball awards ceremonies, Kumbaya sing offs, inter alia.

You could tour this fair land as “The Best/Worst Example of BDS”. For the great unwashed, that’s Bush Derangement Syndrome.

Allow me to recapture some words – Sacred & Holy – that have been hijacked by the turbaned thugs who have also hijacked our planes.

Today begins the holiest week in Christendom.

The Founders pledged their fortunes and their sacred honor to America.

It is indeed fitting and proper to speak of our rights, particularly in a week that all religions honor. Our rights were not given to us by a benevolent government. They are ours from birth “from beyond the stars”. There is no more sacred place than that. 26 centuries our Hellenic forebears said the “Free men speak with free tongues”.

Thus, I claim the right, indeed the duty, to point out all the turds that you have floated in this morning’s modern American Liberal punch bowl.

#1 – The story of Bush v Gore begins with the sliming of Judge Bork. For that the late Senator Lard Kennedy should get your thanks. The Supreme Court voted 5 to 4 to accept the case. It then voted 7 to 2 to deny Gore’s petition thus sending VP Alpha Gump back to perfecting the Internet, “Releasing his shakra”, and breathing new life into the ozone layer. If Bork had been confirmed he would have voted against accepting the case. Be careful what you wish for.

#2 – If Albert Arnold Gore, Jr, the son of Albert Arnold Gore, Sr, AKA Armand Hammer’s Bag Man, had carried Tennessee, his home state, he would have been President even if Bush had pitched a shutout in Florida.

#3 – If President Handsome Billy from Hot Springs had carried Arkansas, his home state, Thumper Gump and all the baby Gumpsters would have had a 4 year lease on the White House.

#4 – It is one of those inconvenient truth for modern American Liberals but the New York Times said that the Florida vote totals were 100% correct. What the Hell do they know?

#5 - Gary Stein, your ideological bunkmate in today’s paper, says that he wants “no more Nazi references”. At the height of the Schiavo matter it was something that the hate filled racist eugenicist, Margaret Sanger, would have loved. Any chance she got for culling the herd of “defectives”, defectives being defined as mentally deficient people, homosexuals, disfigured people, Jews, gypsies, and non-Caucasians she would have leaped at. Hitler so admired her writings that he used them for the basis of his 1934 race laws. Later, her work was used by the defense at the Nuremberg trials.

#6 – I thought the Stand Your Ground act was passed by the legislature and then signed by the Governor. Thanks for telling me that he bypassed the legislature and used his executive powers to pass it. I guess he wanted to pass it so he could see what was in it. How long has the legislature been absent from Tallahassee? How long has it been since we had an election for state wide offices? Why wasn’t I told?

#7 – The Constitution guarantees each state a Republican form of government. Look it up. Don’t blame legislators for voting as they promised their electors they would. Next time, if there is a next time, get more of “your people” to vote. When they get half plus one of the Houses and they elect a Governor they can pass Don’t Stand Your Ground. Until then you have my permission to carp, kvetch, and caterwaul about what those people have done in the voting booth

#8 – I congratulate you on your ability to write things so egregiously ignorant of History that my fingernails curl backwards.

“Even the most cynical among us never imagined
The degree to which ballots were routinely tossed.”

To me, the highlight of the 2000 recount was when a man named Daley, a son of Emperor Richard the First of Chicago, got off the plane and said, straight faced and without wetting his pants, “Let the recount begin”. He would have continued the tradition begun by Landslide Lyndon in 1948. I for one believe that the recount in Duval County, the one that showed 201 of the 203 votes cast in one district were in alphabetical order, was not a fluke. Somebody won the big LOTTO last night, didn’t they?

One of the great accomplishments of Mayor Daley in Chicago was that no one died around Election Day. Modern medicine, a caring political machine, and the need for last minute absentee ballot names precluded death. The following year, the not quite dead, were early voters.

It is said that Daley’s heavy thumb on the scale for Kennedy in 1960 haunted him. If Nixon had won Johnson would not been able to say that he “personally approved the bombing of every shit house in Vietnam”.

#9 – One thing more before I go. You say…

“George W entangled us in a war in Iraq…”

One of the perpetual mantras of modern American Liberals is that had Bush been impeached he could have used diminished capacity as a defense. I have heard of people flunking out of Yale and Harvard. I seldom hear of people flunking in to them. If he was so God Damn dumb that he still thinks that Manual Labor does his lawn how was he able to euchre 3/4ths of Congress into voting for it?

Modern American Liberals, particularly those infused with terminal non-malodorous fecal matter syndrome, should have known better.





KEVIN SMITH
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET




PS – Lord Barack the Benevolent has borrowed as much in 3 years as W did in 8. Mush brained pundits said it was terrible and immoral then. Why is it OK now?