Sen. Carl Levin

April 27, 2008

Senator Carl Levin

30500 Van Dyke - #206

Warren, MI 48039-2109

RE: G-d Damn! A United States Senator – you – as an opening act for a Jew Hating poltroon.

Senator Levin,

Who says I miss the old days?

Thanks to the wonders of satellite TV and/or the Internet, and I for one can never thank that big galoot, Albert Arnold Gore, enough for inventing the Internet, I saw you at the NAACP convention in Detroit. I think you took your rhythm lessons from Steve Martin in “The Jerk” or Gene Wilder in “Silver Streak”. This is a subtle Caucasian way of saying that Mr. Bojangles or Mr. Interloculator have no worries about being added to Detroit’s 15% unemployment rate by you. Try to keep your day job.

A brief digression.

I don’t know how big the room was that you were doing your shtick in. I think the mung you use to keep your comb over in place could be an environmental hazard, particularly in a small room. My Michigan sources tell me that you staple worms to your head to get birds to fly over it. I say birds because last month you auditioned for the role of Saint Francis of Assisi. Oh well, that’s show biz.

The problem with a guy named Levin being the opening act for a guy named Wright is that, in this particular case, it was wrong.

If my memory serves me correctly the last American African-American to have absolutely no ambivalent feelings about Jews was Sammy Davis, Jr.

Farrakhan, Kaddafi, “gutter religion”, B. Hussein Obama, “God Damn America”, “the U.S. of KKK”, “hook nosed diamond merchants”, Israeli apartheid, and you up on the stage, in full modern American Liberal mind set, doing your best Kumbaya imitation. God’s Holy Trousers, but if I could turn that hypocritical moment into unleaded regular I would drive the pump price down by a half a buck a gallon.

Permit me a paraphrase. “At long last, Senator, at long last. Have you no sense of shame”?

You should let you ear hair grow longer. That way you’ll be able to cover your face.

In your case prolonged exposure to a mirror could cause depression and self mutilation.

Send up a flare when Pastor Wright goes to a Bnai Brith breakfast as the guest speaker.

PS – Your CV says that you attended Central High School in Detroit. Was the area known as “Hymietown”? Did your children go there? Did any of your grandchildren go there? When was the last time anybody named Levin went there?