Posts
December 26, 2008
Mitchell Kaplan
Books & Books
265 Aragon Avenue
Coral Gables, Florida 33134 - 5008
Mr. Kaplan,
I read of your 1974 introduction to Kentucky hospitality in today’s Miami Herald Weekend.
If only our conversation in your store in 1996 had lasted longer than 45 seconds I could have confirmed that. I spent 12 years in the coal mining business in eastern Kentucky. They were good, caring people who were hospitable to a fault. And they sure loved their guns, didn’t they?
It’s been 12 years since our only conversation. It seems like yesterday to me.
I was in the poetry section of your marvelous store where I was attended to by a well read sales lady. What was most impressive about her was that knowledge of poetry went beyond Rod McKuen.
I asked her where Ezra Pound was located.
“We don’t carry him,” she said.
“Why not?” I asked.
“Ask him,” she said, pointing to you.
I asked you why there was no Pound.
You told me he was an anti-Semite and that you would not stock any books by or about him.
One of the joys of ownership is that you can do what you want.
One of the joys of being a buyer is that you don’t have to.
For 12 years I have listened to you carry on about freedom of speech. For 12 years I have watched as other people speak highly of your regard for freedom, particularly as a champion of free speech. 12 years ago, in typical modern American Liberal fashion, you demonstrated that you principles were eclectic. “Free Speech for Me but not for Thee” as Nat Hentoff says. For 12 years you have been the poster boy for “non-malodorous fecal matter”.
Now, thanks to the frontier pushing of Governor Blago, the charming Mrs. Governor Blago, and Rahmbo Oh come Oh come Emmanuel I have found the word to describe your “speech is free…almost” position.
BULLSHIT
I was going to use strange language YES like James Joyce but you never would have read him because YES Ezra Pound edited him. I was going to toss in a few lines from Yeats but since Ezra Pound edited him he would be verboten to you. Ditto for Hemingway.
Did you know Ezra Pound was never arrested, never arraigned, never tried, and never convicted of anything? He was locked up for 13 years in a loony bin in a prequel to Camp Gitmo. Alas, you couldn’t have known that, could you?
Anyway, as my aunt from Hester Street used to say, “Don’t piss on my back and tell me it’s rain”.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Aaron Deslatte, Josh Hafenbrack, The Sun Sentinel
December 25, 2008
Aaron Deslatte
Josh Hafenbrack
The Sun Sentinel
200 East Las Olas Boulevard
Fort Lauderdale, Florida 33301
RE: Florida’s budget woes – as reported by you in today’s Sun Sentinel
Gentlemen,
All I want for Christmas is an article about government finances that has some relationship with the real world. I suppose it would be a bit much to expect some working knowledge of the laws concerning gravity but Christmas is based on hope, isn’t it?
The headline says
MORE BUDGET CUTS NEAR AS FLORIDA BATTLES DEBT
Your first paragraph says that one of the ways that Florida will “battle debt” is by “going into more debt”. It is as if you are saying that going from 12 feet of water to 15 feet of water will make it simpler for me, a non-swimmer, to stay afloat.
I think Aristotle, one of the original dead White European males, spoke to that. “Something cannot be that which it is not.” On second thought the only exception is government. So much for lockboxes.
The next egregious line should be a flogging offense.
You say that Senator Atwater and Speaker Sansom “generally agree with the Governor on how to dig out of this hole”.
“Dig out of a hole”?
As someone who has dug holes in 3 countries I ask you to accept that I say with 100% absolute metaphysical certitude that you cannot “dig out of a hole”.
My international hole digging experience was good training for when I became a Chief Financial Officer of a public company. When you find your self in a hole too deep or a hole on the wrong side of the river you do not ask for a bigger shovel. The temporary solution is obvious.
STOP DIGGING
Good businesses build reserves in good times to help them get through bad times. Governor Bush left office with cash reserves of some $6,500,000,000, an amount exceeding more than 10% of his last budget. No one could have foreseen the devastation of the last year. Think how much worse it would have been had the good husbandry of the previous administration had not bee so pronounced?
Why, the head shaking taxpayer, an occupant of the real world, a world where “stones are hard and water is wet”, a world where billions of dollars have gone walkabout, a world where financial institutions once thought to be 10 feet tall and bulletproof have vanished over a long weekend, asks should governments be exempt from the chaos around us?
A quick example of water running uphill would be the Broward County School System.
For 4 years the number of students has gone down.
Has the budget, either expense or capital, reflected that?
Before you answer it may be time to get off Santa’s lap.
Aaron Deslatte
Josh Hafenbrack
The Sun Sentinel
200 East Las Olas Boulevard
Fort Lauderdale, Florida 33301
RE: Florida’s budget woes – as reported by you in today’s Sun Sentinel
Gentlemen,
All I want for Christmas is an article about government finances that has some relationship with the real world. I suppose it would be a bit much to expect some working knowledge of the laws concerning gravity but Christmas is based on hope, isn’t it?
The headline says
MORE BUDGET CUTS NEAR AS FLORIDA BATTLES DEBT
Your first paragraph says that one of the ways that Florida will “battle debt” is by “going into more debt”. It is as if you are saying that going from 12 feet of water to 15 feet of water will make it simpler for me, a non-swimmer, to stay afloat.
I think Aristotle, one of the original dead White European males, spoke to that. “Something cannot be that which it is not.” On second thought the only exception is government. So much for lockboxes.
The next egregious line should be a flogging offense.
You say that Senator Atwater and Speaker Sansom “generally agree with the Governor on how to dig out of this hole”.
“Dig out of a hole”?
As someone who has dug holes in 3 countries I ask you to accept that I say with 100% absolute metaphysical certitude that you cannot “dig out of a hole”.
My international hole digging experience was good training for when I became a Chief Financial Officer of a public company. When you find your self in a hole too deep or a hole on the wrong side of the river you do not ask for a bigger shovel. The temporary solution is obvious.
STOP DIGGING
Good businesses build reserves in good times to help them get through bad times. Governor Bush left office with cash reserves of some $6,500,000,000, an amount exceeding more than 10% of his last budget. No one could have foreseen the devastation of the last year. Think how much worse it would have been had the good husbandry of the previous administration had not bee so pronounced?
Why, the head shaking taxpayer, an occupant of the real world, a world where “stones are hard and water is wet”, a world where billions of dollars have gone walkabout, a world where financial institutions once thought to be 10 feet tall and bulletproof have vanished over a long weekend, asks should governments be exempt from the chaos around us?
A quick example of water running uphill would be the Broward County School System.
For 4 years the number of students has gone down.
Has the budget, either expense or capital, reflected that?
Before you answer it may be time to get off Santa’s lap.
Chris Matthews
December 24, 2008
Chris Matthews
MSNBC Hardball
30 Rockefeller Plaza
New York, New York 10112
RE: Congratulations!
Mr. Matthews,
“I feel this thrill going up my leg.
I don’t have that too often.”
You
On the occasion of having the shadow
Of the Chosen One fall upon you.
Hardball implies that there is a pitcher and that there is a catcher.
If you don’t have that “thrill going up my leg too often” may I suggest a change in seating arrangements? Monica Lewinsky on one side and Barney Frank on the other. As that noted political sage, Woody Allen, often said, “Being a switch hitter doubles your chances of hooking up on a Saturday night”.
I hate to trivialize your lack of blue veiners, a condition relieved by B. Obama, one of Governor Blago’s good friends, but, Crikey, that was a dumb thing to say. Just for saying it in public you have won a much sought after award.
HORSE’S ASS OF THE WEEK
It’s a noble laurel that is not given lightly.
But wait. There’s more.
Because you didn’t try to walk that statement back by saying something like “Zounds but that was a dumb thing to say. Only a horse’s ass would say something like that. What was I thinking? If my grandfather were here he would kick my ass so hard I’d have to take my socks down to take a dump”.
Like the clap is a symbol wretched excess what I said is an example of what modern American Liberals would like to say but don’t. Usually your persiflage is particularly obufscatory unless your talking about President Bush or a United States Senate seat from Illinois.
For not trying to apologize for sharing the latent tumescence caused by President Bambi with everybody in Christendom you have won another award.
POMPOUS FART OF THE MONTH
With those two in hand and with a shortage of Irish Catholic award winners it was not such a great leap to give you the third and highest award.
You have earned this for two reasons:
#1 – You have been in the same room with noted troll Keith Doberman on several occasions. Why you have not him between the eyes, repeatedly, with the little hatchet that you keep in your ditty bag is beyond me.
#2 – Albert Hunt, another modern American Liberal rotter, made a gallant dash in the stretch for year end honors. Alas, he came up short. He told that us that one of the things that made Mrs. Schlossberg a serious contender for the United States Senate was that “she hails her own cab”. Next he’ll tell us that she picks her own nose and scratches her own ass. The Senate, a place where former KuKluxKlan member Bobby “Beat them Nigras” Byrd can rise to a position of leadership, a place where Harrison Williams [D-NJ] and Robert Torricelli [D-NJ] were figures of envy, needs people of gravitas, people with achievements beyond being President of the Lucky Sperm Club.
You have been consistent; both with your offensive to Logic statements and with your use of spittle as dangerous weapon, as a spokesman for mush brained, power crazed modern American Liberals. That, coupled with the one common denominator of mALs, “non-malodorous fecal matter”, earned you the highest honor.
SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR
PS – In the words of Governor Blago, the charming Mrs. Governor Blago, and that noted secular humanist and semi-tough a guy as he thinks, Rahmbo Oh Come Emmanuel, “Go Fuck Yourself”
Chris Matthews
MSNBC Hardball
30 Rockefeller Plaza
New York, New York 10112
RE: Congratulations!
Mr. Matthews,
“I feel this thrill going up my leg.
I don’t have that too often.”
You
On the occasion of having the shadow
Of the Chosen One fall upon you.
Hardball implies that there is a pitcher and that there is a catcher.
If you don’t have that “thrill going up my leg too often” may I suggest a change in seating arrangements? Monica Lewinsky on one side and Barney Frank on the other. As that noted political sage, Woody Allen, often said, “Being a switch hitter doubles your chances of hooking up on a Saturday night”.
I hate to trivialize your lack of blue veiners, a condition relieved by B. Obama, one of Governor Blago’s good friends, but, Crikey, that was a dumb thing to say. Just for saying it in public you have won a much sought after award.
HORSE’S ASS OF THE WEEK
It’s a noble laurel that is not given lightly.
But wait. There’s more.
Because you didn’t try to walk that statement back by saying something like “Zounds but that was a dumb thing to say. Only a horse’s ass would say something like that. What was I thinking? If my grandfather were here he would kick my ass so hard I’d have to take my socks down to take a dump”.
Like the clap is a symbol wretched excess what I said is an example of what modern American Liberals would like to say but don’t. Usually your persiflage is particularly obufscatory unless your talking about President Bush or a United States Senate seat from Illinois.
For not trying to apologize for sharing the latent tumescence caused by President Bambi with everybody in Christendom you have won another award.
POMPOUS FART OF THE MONTH
With those two in hand and with a shortage of Irish Catholic award winners it was not such a great leap to give you the third and highest award.
You have earned this for two reasons:
#1 – You have been in the same room with noted troll Keith Doberman on several occasions. Why you have not him between the eyes, repeatedly, with the little hatchet that you keep in your ditty bag is beyond me.
#2 – Albert Hunt, another modern American Liberal rotter, made a gallant dash in the stretch for year end honors. Alas, he came up short. He told that us that one of the things that made Mrs. Schlossberg a serious contender for the United States Senate was that “she hails her own cab”. Next he’ll tell us that she picks her own nose and scratches her own ass. The Senate, a place where former KuKluxKlan member Bobby “Beat them Nigras” Byrd can rise to a position of leadership, a place where Harrison Williams [D-NJ] and Robert Torricelli [D-NJ] were figures of envy, needs people of gravitas, people with achievements beyond being President of the Lucky Sperm Club.
You have been consistent; both with your offensive to Logic statements and with your use of spittle as dangerous weapon, as a spokesman for mush brained, power crazed modern American Liberals. That, coupled with the one common denominator of mALs, “non-malodorous fecal matter”, earned you the highest honor.
SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR
PS – In the words of Governor Blago, the charming Mrs. Governor Blago, and that noted secular humanist and semi-tough a guy as he thinks, Rahmbo Oh Come Emmanuel, “Go Fuck Yourself”
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Peter Franceschina, The Sun Sentinel
December 21, 2008
Peter Franceschina
The Sun Sentinel
200 East Las Olas Boulevard
Fort Lauderdale, Florida 33316
RE: “Living Outside the Law” – The sad tale of 4 Florida elected officials who don’t live in the districts that they represent and how they were able to overcome the stigma of breaking the law because of their devotion to public service and their desire to serve the people. As told by you in today’s Sun Sentinel.
Mr. Franceschina,
I thought the picture on Page One was marvelous.
Coming under the intriguing headline “Anger at GOP Luxury Jaunt” I thought you had found a bag lady – Check out those plaid PJ bottoms! – and that the story was going to be about how 8 years of Bush-Cheney just added more lashes to already bloody back of one of Broward’s undeserving poor. Boy oh boy but was I wrong! It was a picture of Lois Wexler [D-Plantation, Weston, Frostproof, Fountain of Youth, Niceville, inter alia] She was bent over like she had adult scoliosis. I would have bet that, had she had shoes, they wouldn’t match. Perhaps she was bent over by the burden of breaking the law every day. As a public servant she probably took an oath to uphold said law. The things people do to serve the public. Sometimes you have to break the law to help people, particularly when those people can’t help themselves
I was wrong.
The last 4 sentences of your story brought tears to my eyes. Where do we find such people? Maybe it’s time to update Profiles in Courage.
“Wexler offered to give the Sun Sentinel a tour of the condo
but then canceled and did not reschedule. She said the residency
requirement has been a hardship. “It has been very difficult on
me financially,” she said. “I’ve told this story to many,
many of my constituents, and it’s a sad story.”
Yes, it is a “sad story”.
Red lights and stop signs are “difficult” sometimes. They could even be considered a “hardship”.
Sir Thomas More said, “A man on oath holds his soul in his hands as if it were water. He opens his fingers at his own peril.”
Your story reveals still more suffering souls.
Jim Waldman [D – Coconut Creek, Ybor, Carol City, Mayport, inter alia]
Susan Bucher [D- Boynton Beach, Boca del Vista, Boca del Mentiros, Boca del Ladrones, Boca del Ginebra, inter alia]
Maria Sachs [D - Delray, Boca del Beppo, Boca del Caca, inter alia]
They have several things in common. They don’t live in the district that they represent. By publicly flouting the law and by publicly flaunting their disregard of the law, the glue that holds society together they share yet one more thing in common. They all have the letter D after their names.
It would be a chalk bet that they all swear allegiance to the law when it suits them. The reason they are able to do this is because they share another common trait. They are MALs. Modern American Liberals are all things to all men, particularly to themselves. Little things, things like where they live, are subordinate to the interests of making this a better place to live, a better place for the children, and, of course, the manatees. How can a silly law about where you live stand in the way of progress?
“This country’s planted thick with laws from coast to coast
and if you cut them down do you think you could
stand upright tin the winds that would blow then?”
Wexler, the trend setting Congressman from Florida, Maryland, and Oz, a man about whom it is impossible to say enough bad things, has more houses than Holiday Inn. Such is his devotion to public service that he has inspired his acolytes here to do likewise. He is Screwtape to these Wormwoods.
Are you sure his Broward namesake wasn’t a bag lady? She has that look about her.
Peter Franceschina
The Sun Sentinel
200 East Las Olas Boulevard
Fort Lauderdale, Florida 33316
RE: “Living Outside the Law” – The sad tale of 4 Florida elected officials who don’t live in the districts that they represent and how they were able to overcome the stigma of breaking the law because of their devotion to public service and their desire to serve the people. As told by you in today’s Sun Sentinel.
Mr. Franceschina,
I thought the picture on Page One was marvelous.
Coming under the intriguing headline “Anger at GOP Luxury Jaunt” I thought you had found a bag lady – Check out those plaid PJ bottoms! – and that the story was going to be about how 8 years of Bush-Cheney just added more lashes to already bloody back of one of Broward’s undeserving poor. Boy oh boy but was I wrong! It was a picture of Lois Wexler [D-Plantation, Weston, Frostproof, Fountain of Youth, Niceville, inter alia] She was bent over like she had adult scoliosis. I would have bet that, had she had shoes, they wouldn’t match. Perhaps she was bent over by the burden of breaking the law every day. As a public servant she probably took an oath to uphold said law. The things people do to serve the public. Sometimes you have to break the law to help people, particularly when those people can’t help themselves
I was wrong.
The last 4 sentences of your story brought tears to my eyes. Where do we find such people? Maybe it’s time to update Profiles in Courage.
“Wexler offered to give the Sun Sentinel a tour of the condo
but then canceled and did not reschedule. She said the residency
requirement has been a hardship. “It has been very difficult on
me financially,” she said. “I’ve told this story to many,
many of my constituents, and it’s a sad story.”
Yes, it is a “sad story”.
Red lights and stop signs are “difficult” sometimes. They could even be considered a “hardship”.
Sir Thomas More said, “A man on oath holds his soul in his hands as if it were water. He opens his fingers at his own peril.”
Your story reveals still more suffering souls.
Jim Waldman [D – Coconut Creek, Ybor, Carol City, Mayport, inter alia]
Susan Bucher [D- Boynton Beach, Boca del Vista, Boca del Mentiros, Boca del Ladrones, Boca del Ginebra, inter alia]
Maria Sachs [D - Delray, Boca del Beppo, Boca del Caca, inter alia]
They have several things in common. They don’t live in the district that they represent. By publicly flouting the law and by publicly flaunting their disregard of the law, the glue that holds society together they share yet one more thing in common. They all have the letter D after their names.
It would be a chalk bet that they all swear allegiance to the law when it suits them. The reason they are able to do this is because they share another common trait. They are MALs. Modern American Liberals are all things to all men, particularly to themselves. Little things, things like where they live, are subordinate to the interests of making this a better place to live, a better place for the children, and, of course, the manatees. How can a silly law about where you live stand in the way of progress?
“This country’s planted thick with laws from coast to coast
and if you cut them down do you think you could
stand upright tin the winds that would blow then?”
Wexler, the trend setting Congressman from Florida, Maryland, and Oz, a man about whom it is impossible to say enough bad things, has more houses than Holiday Inn. Such is his devotion to public service that he has inspired his acolytes here to do likewise. He is Screwtape to these Wormwoods.
Are you sure his Broward namesake wasn’t a bag lady? She has that look about her.
Ellen Goodman, Washington Post
December 19, 2008
Ellen Goodman
The Washington Post Writers Group
1150 15th Street NW
Washington, DC 20071
RE: You made it! A last minute addition to the highly coveted year end honors list
Ms. Goodman,
Sloth is the only reason for not naming you earlier. Mine; not yours. Your columns are so predictably bird brainish, so offensive to Logic, and so inimical to History that I stopped reading them lest I injure my eyes.
While waiting for my post operative purgative to kick in I began reading your column. I was, as Shaw [GB, not Bernard] once said, “in the smallest room in the house. Your column is in front of me. Soon it will be behind me.” The ultimate in recycling!
The Miami Herald titled your column “A Fine Senator in the Making”.
You say that “if life were fair…the first Kennedy woman to achieve high office would have been Kathleen Kennedy Townsend”.
Earth to Ellen. Earth to Ellen. She is a dolt. Do you remember when the Baltimore Ravens won the Super Bowl? She came out of the stadium gushing about how when we “scored a football and then they scored a football we scored another football”. Stupid, bordering on world class dumb. Maybe life is fair after all. Since Mrs. Schlossberg shares a significant number of genes as Mrs. Townsend maybe she is just as dumb.
I am told that she raised money to support public schools in New York City. Would you know if any of her children went to those particular public schools? In fact, would you know if any of her children ever went to any public schools?
The media spent thousands of work hours trying to find something, anything, about Sarah Palin, her family, and her husband’s family that would suggest she was not what she seemed to be.
May I suggest some questions for Mrs. Schlossberg?
#1 – You’ve been a lawyer in Manhattan for 25 years. How would you get to the Tombs?
#2 – The first job your Uncle Bobby had was working as Counsel to Senator Joseph McCarthy. Do you like what he did?
#3 – Your father’s father supported Hitler. Would you care to comment on that?
#4 – Why did you fail to vote in most of the elections held since you registered in Manhattan in 1988?
#5 – Your father supported huge tax cuts for business and individuals. Do you?
#6 – WAL*MART or Costco. Which store do you prefer?
#7 – Your father said that “we will pay any price or bear any burden in defense of freedom.” Do you agree with that?
#8 – When you were in Buffalo did you have beef on wick or fried baloney?
#9 – Uncle Teddy cheated in college. Did you?
Your final sentence is a modern American Liberal classic.
“You are choosing the emblem of a generation – and maybe a country –
coming back to life. Public life.”
Angels trumpeting “Ask not what your country can do for you…” are offset by the great Dr. Johnson’s description of second marriages, a not necessarily inappropriate analogy I might add. “It is the triumph of hope over experience.”
You say she is “coming home to the family business”. If History is a guide can we look forward to another Vietnam, another series of wire taps on civil rights leaders, and orvine sexual proclivities?
For these particular sins and for myriad past offenses against the common good you are hereby awarded the following honors:
HORSE’S ASS OF THE WEEK
POMPOUS FART OF THE MONTH
SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR
Is twit gender specific or is it universal? Either way you share it with the next Chosen One.
PS – If she gets back to Buffalo tell her that she shouldn’t order Cosmopolitans if she winds up in the Anchor Bar.
Ellen Goodman
The Washington Post Writers Group
1150 15th Street NW
Washington, DC 20071
RE: You made it! A last minute addition to the highly coveted year end honors list
Ms. Goodman,
Sloth is the only reason for not naming you earlier. Mine; not yours. Your columns are so predictably bird brainish, so offensive to Logic, and so inimical to History that I stopped reading them lest I injure my eyes.
While waiting for my post operative purgative to kick in I began reading your column. I was, as Shaw [GB, not Bernard] once said, “in the smallest room in the house. Your column is in front of me. Soon it will be behind me.” The ultimate in recycling!
The Miami Herald titled your column “A Fine Senator in the Making”.
You say that “if life were fair…the first Kennedy woman to achieve high office would have been Kathleen Kennedy Townsend”.
Earth to Ellen. Earth to Ellen. She is a dolt. Do you remember when the Baltimore Ravens won the Super Bowl? She came out of the stadium gushing about how when we “scored a football and then they scored a football we scored another football”. Stupid, bordering on world class dumb. Maybe life is fair after all. Since Mrs. Schlossberg shares a significant number of genes as Mrs. Townsend maybe she is just as dumb.
I am told that she raised money to support public schools in New York City. Would you know if any of her children went to those particular public schools? In fact, would you know if any of her children ever went to any public schools?
The media spent thousands of work hours trying to find something, anything, about Sarah Palin, her family, and her husband’s family that would suggest she was not what she seemed to be.
May I suggest some questions for Mrs. Schlossberg?
#1 – You’ve been a lawyer in Manhattan for 25 years. How would you get to the Tombs?
#2 – The first job your Uncle Bobby had was working as Counsel to Senator Joseph McCarthy. Do you like what he did?
#3 – Your father’s father supported Hitler. Would you care to comment on that?
#4 – Why did you fail to vote in most of the elections held since you registered in Manhattan in 1988?
#5 – Your father supported huge tax cuts for business and individuals. Do you?
#6 – WAL*MART or Costco. Which store do you prefer?
#7 – Your father said that “we will pay any price or bear any burden in defense of freedom.” Do you agree with that?
#8 – When you were in Buffalo did you have beef on wick or fried baloney?
#9 – Uncle Teddy cheated in college. Did you?
Your final sentence is a modern American Liberal classic.
“You are choosing the emblem of a generation – and maybe a country –
coming back to life. Public life.”
Angels trumpeting “Ask not what your country can do for you…” are offset by the great Dr. Johnson’s description of second marriages, a not necessarily inappropriate analogy I might add. “It is the triumph of hope over experience.”
You say she is “coming home to the family business”. If History is a guide can we look forward to another Vietnam, another series of wire taps on civil rights leaders, and orvine sexual proclivities?
For these particular sins and for myriad past offenses against the common good you are hereby awarded the following honors:
HORSE’S ASS OF THE WEEK
POMPOUS FART OF THE MONTH
SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR
Is twit gender specific or is it universal? Either way you share it with the next Chosen One.
PS – If she gets back to Buffalo tell her that she shouldn’t order Cosmopolitans if she winds up in the Anchor Bar.
David Fleshler, The Sun Sentinel
December 19, 2008
David Fleshler
The Sun Sentinel
200 East Las Olas Boulevard
Fort Lauderdale, Florida 33301
RE: PANTHERS BEST HOPE – ROOM TO ROAM Is this a headline beyond parody? You didn’t think so. That’s how it reads on this morning’s Page One.
Mr. Fleshler,
Are the inmates running the asylum? In your case, are the boobies running the hatch? Is Professor Irwin Corey in charge of the Sentinel?
More panthers are good for Florida.
More panthers are good for Florida?
Is this the result of the Tribune – your parent company – bankruptcy?
You want to see more panthers in Florida?
How about some Great Whites in the intracoastal?
How about some Komodo dragons in the malls?
How about some Ebola viruses for the vegans among us?
Why should Zimbabwe have all the fun? Import cholera.
Madness.
David Fleshler
The Sun Sentinel
200 East Las Olas Boulevard
Fort Lauderdale, Florida 33301
RE: PANTHERS BEST HOPE – ROOM TO ROAM Is this a headline beyond parody? You didn’t think so. That’s how it reads on this morning’s Page One.
Mr. Fleshler,
Are the inmates running the asylum? In your case, are the boobies running the hatch? Is Professor Irwin Corey in charge of the Sentinel?
More panthers are good for Florida.
More panthers are good for Florida?
Is this the result of the Tribune – your parent company – bankruptcy?
You want to see more panthers in Florida?
How about some Great Whites in the intracoastal?
How about some Komodo dragons in the malls?
How about some Ebola viruses for the vegans among us?
Why should Zimbabwe have all the fun? Import cholera.
Madness.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Fred Grimm, The Miami Herald
December 14, 2008
Fred Grimm
The Miami Herald
One Herald Plaza
Miami, Florida 33132-1693
RE – Bailing out the Big 3 and bailing out our schools – A different perspective on drawing sustenance from the eternally lactating public mammary.
Mr. Grimm,
First, a comment on lies, damn lies, and statistics.
You said that “members of Congress from the 48 states that spend more per student than Florida might balk at helping out schools in a state that won’t help itself”.
Are you saying that spending more money guarantees a better education? No place spends more money per student than Washington, DC. If, as you say, more money means better schools why are the Obama children not going to public school there? Why didn’t Chelsea Clinton go to public school there? Why didn’t any of the Gore children go to public school there?
President Bush’s daughters attended Austin Westlake High School – a public high school. You knew that, didn’t you?
Your comparison on the failing American automobile industry and the failing American public education system is predicated on never letting facts interfere with your argument.
After decades of failing the Big 3 want the American taxpayer to bail them out. They make an inferior product that is overpriced. These wounds, ones of design flaws and absurd union contracts, were mostly self-inflicted. The market place has spoken. There will be no end to the public transfusions.
American public education is predicated on the convoy system. The slowest ship sets the speed limit for the rest of the convoy. Since success can’t be rewarded and, worse, since failure can’t be penalized mediocrity is the norm. Taxpayers already pick up the tab. The notion that more public money will make a better product is offensive to Logic.
American education has been failing so long that it thrives on this public failure. It’s always someone else’s fault that Johnny can’t read. Florida high school football coaches have a very short use life. Effort doesn’t count; results do. If the coach doesn’t perform he is fired. If the math teacher doesn’t perform he gets a raise. If the principal has a stable filled with horses’ asses he is looked on as a friend to animals. If the superintendent looks on the letters FCAT as a vampire looks on a sun drenched holy water dousing he need but cry “More Money” and he is regarded as a saint.
Madness.
Since nothing else seems to work here is a modest proposal.
Each and every child of each and every public employee – appointed or elected – must attend public school. No exceptions.
How about culling the herd of jackass administrators? Did you know that the Broward Board of Education pays more than $100,000 a year to people who are listed as “diversity experts”? Use automatic weapons. Most of them couldn’t find a class room with a blood hound and a GPS.
You say that states that spend more per pupil would resent us. Shouldn’t Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi, and Alabama resent the Hell out of us? By refusing to drill off the Gulf coast of Florida we place an unfair burden on those states who do drill off theirs.
Even an educationally deprived Florida student, a student who has grown up hearing his teachers caterwauling “If only we had more think how much better we would do”, knows that.
Fred Grimm
The Miami Herald
One Herald Plaza
Miami, Florida 33132-1693
RE – Bailing out the Big 3 and bailing out our schools – A different perspective on drawing sustenance from the eternally lactating public mammary.
Mr. Grimm,
First, a comment on lies, damn lies, and statistics.
You said that “members of Congress from the 48 states that spend more per student than Florida might balk at helping out schools in a state that won’t help itself”.
Are you saying that spending more money guarantees a better education? No place spends more money per student than Washington, DC. If, as you say, more money means better schools why are the Obama children not going to public school there? Why didn’t Chelsea Clinton go to public school there? Why didn’t any of the Gore children go to public school there?
President Bush’s daughters attended Austin Westlake High School – a public high school. You knew that, didn’t you?
Your comparison on the failing American automobile industry and the failing American public education system is predicated on never letting facts interfere with your argument.
After decades of failing the Big 3 want the American taxpayer to bail them out. They make an inferior product that is overpriced. These wounds, ones of design flaws and absurd union contracts, were mostly self-inflicted. The market place has spoken. There will be no end to the public transfusions.
American public education is predicated on the convoy system. The slowest ship sets the speed limit for the rest of the convoy. Since success can’t be rewarded and, worse, since failure can’t be penalized mediocrity is the norm. Taxpayers already pick up the tab. The notion that more public money will make a better product is offensive to Logic.
American education has been failing so long that it thrives on this public failure. It’s always someone else’s fault that Johnny can’t read. Florida high school football coaches have a very short use life. Effort doesn’t count; results do. If the coach doesn’t perform he is fired. If the math teacher doesn’t perform he gets a raise. If the principal has a stable filled with horses’ asses he is looked on as a friend to animals. If the superintendent looks on the letters FCAT as a vampire looks on a sun drenched holy water dousing he need but cry “More Money” and he is regarded as a saint.
Madness.
Since nothing else seems to work here is a modest proposal.
Each and every child of each and every public employee – appointed or elected – must attend public school. No exceptions.
How about culling the herd of jackass administrators? Did you know that the Broward Board of Education pays more than $100,000 a year to people who are listed as “diversity experts”? Use automatic weapons. Most of them couldn’t find a class room with a blood hound and a GPS.
You say that states that spend more per pupil would resent us. Shouldn’t Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi, and Alabama resent the Hell out of us? By refusing to drill off the Gulf coast of Florida we place an unfair burden on those states who do drill off theirs.
Even an educationally deprived Florida student, a student who has grown up hearing his teachers caterwauling “If only we had more think how much better we would do”, knows that.
Sasha Issenberg, The Boston Globe
December 14, 2008
Sasha Issenberg
The Boston Globe
P.O. Box 55819
Boston, MA 02205-5819
RE: “Kennedy Answers the Call” – The astonishing headline highlighting your story in today’s Miami Herald about someone named Caroline Schlossberg who is President of – and who says the glass ceiling hasn’t been broken? – the Lucky Sperm Club.
Ms. Issenberg,
We begin with the obvious questions.
What call?
Who is calling?
As a Roman Catholic I must tell you that, Vatican 2 notwithstanding, death is still the first step on a lengthy process ending in sainthood. She ain’t dead.
You say that the high point of her public life was raising money for a private charity that supports public schools.
I hate to be thought of as a turd in the punch bowl but do you know if any of her children went to public schools? Do you know if any of her first cousins or any of their children went to public schools?
If any of them did my brother the hunchback will straighten up.
Sasha Issenberg
The Boston Globe
P.O. Box 55819
Boston, MA 02205-5819
RE: “Kennedy Answers the Call” – The astonishing headline highlighting your story in today’s Miami Herald about someone named Caroline Schlossberg who is President of – and who says the glass ceiling hasn’t been broken? – the Lucky Sperm Club.
Ms. Issenberg,
We begin with the obvious questions.
What call?
Who is calling?
As a Roman Catholic I must tell you that, Vatican 2 notwithstanding, death is still the first step on a lengthy process ending in sainthood. She ain’t dead.
You say that the high point of her public life was raising money for a private charity that supports public schools.
I hate to be thought of as a turd in the punch bowl but do you know if any of her children went to public schools? Do you know if any of her first cousins or any of their children went to public schools?
If any of them did my brother the hunchback will straighten up.
Joan Vennochi, The Boston Globe
December 14, 2008
Joan Vennochi
The Boston Globe
P.O. Box 55819
Boston, MA 02205- 55819
RE: 20 words – infinite errors
Ms. Vennochi,
“As Paul Newman said at the climax of “Cool Hand Luke”
‘What we have here is a failure to communicate’.”
#1 – Paul Newman never said that.
#2 – The warden said, “What we have here is failure to communicate”.
#3 – The difference – a – is enormous.
#3 – Climax? My, my. Movies end. Movies stop. Movies never “climax”.
The aforementioned 20 words have earned you a special year end award.
“SEMI-LITERATE MARE’S ASS OF THE WEEK”
Congratulations and a truly non-denominational Season’s Greetings to you.
Joan Vennochi
The Boston Globe
P.O. Box 55819
Boston, MA 02205- 55819
RE: 20 words – infinite errors
Ms. Vennochi,
“As Paul Newman said at the climax of “Cool Hand Luke”
‘What we have here is a failure to communicate’.”
#1 – Paul Newman never said that.
#2 – The warden said, “What we have here is failure to communicate”.
#3 – The difference – a – is enormous.
#3 – Climax? My, my. Movies end. Movies stop. Movies never “climax”.
The aforementioned 20 words have earned you a special year end award.
“SEMI-LITERATE MARE’S ASS OF THE WEEK”
Congratulations and a truly non-denominational Season’s Greetings to you.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Three New Stooges
I think it was Churchill who said “Be of good cheer. Things will come right in the end.”
Evidence of that optimistic outlook is everywhere. Perhaps it is not a coincidence that the arrival of The Chosen One has led to an accentuation of the positive with no more Mister in Between.
“Congressman Rostenkowski says all pols aren’t like Blago.”
“Gore says the world cares more about Paris Hilton than Global Warming.”
“Caroline Kennedy up for New York Senate seat.”
#1 – Rostenkowski, the paradigmatic template of ethical behavior, cautions us not to judge all pols like Governor Blago. Rosty went to jail for stealing from himself, his office, the House of Representatives, his constituents, and the people of America. His lesson, it’s always the rotten 96% who ruin it for the others, is worth noting.
#2 – Albert Arnold Gore, Jr., AKA Alpha Gump, noted Tennessee slumlord, wishes that the world was made up of more Paris Hiltons. Only people as bright as that ninny could agree with him, a 21st Century Lysenko, a man who gives horses’ asses a bad name, when he babbles on about Global Warming and drowning polar bears and reverse hockey sticks. As the head boob he should thank God for people such as Paris Hilton. Who else would listen to him without evacuating their bladders in paroxysms of uncontrollable guffaws? He makes her sound like Marie Curie. She makes him sound like someone who knows what color an orange is.
#3 – As the Manhattan doyenne of The Lucky Sperm Club Caroline Kennedy has one big thing going for her. She is smarter than her cousin Kathleen Kennedy Townsend, the former Lieutenant Governor of Maryland. Alas, that’s not saying much because that broad was so dumb she made my hair hurt. The label, Toes to the Front, is in all her shoes. She bats about .400. Maybe she gets dressed in the dark. Imagine if her name were Caroline Schlossberg. The only way she gets to the Senate is with the high school tour.
“Like I said “things will come right in the end”.
The Democrats are back.
Evidence of that optimistic outlook is everywhere. Perhaps it is not a coincidence that the arrival of The Chosen One has led to an accentuation of the positive with no more Mister in Between.
“Congressman Rostenkowski says all pols aren’t like Blago.”
“Gore says the world cares more about Paris Hilton than Global Warming.”
“Caroline Kennedy up for New York Senate seat.”
#1 – Rostenkowski, the paradigmatic template of ethical behavior, cautions us not to judge all pols like Governor Blago. Rosty went to jail for stealing from himself, his office, the House of Representatives, his constituents, and the people of America. His lesson, it’s always the rotten 96% who ruin it for the others, is worth noting.
#2 – Albert Arnold Gore, Jr., AKA Alpha Gump, noted Tennessee slumlord, wishes that the world was made up of more Paris Hiltons. Only people as bright as that ninny could agree with him, a 21st Century Lysenko, a man who gives horses’ asses a bad name, when he babbles on about Global Warming and drowning polar bears and reverse hockey sticks. As the head boob he should thank God for people such as Paris Hilton. Who else would listen to him without evacuating their bladders in paroxysms of uncontrollable guffaws? He makes her sound like Marie Curie. She makes him sound like someone who knows what color an orange is.
#3 – As the Manhattan doyenne of The Lucky Sperm Club Caroline Kennedy has one big thing going for her. She is smarter than her cousin Kathleen Kennedy Townsend, the former Lieutenant Governor of Maryland. Alas, that’s not saying much because that broad was so dumb she made my hair hurt. The label, Toes to the Front, is in all her shoes. She bats about .400. Maybe she gets dressed in the dark. Imagine if her name were Caroline Schlossberg. The only way she gets to the Senate is with the high school tour.
“Like I said “things will come right in the end”.
The Democrats are back.
Why We Have Newspapers
December 13, 2008
The Miami Herald
One Herald Plaza
Miami, Florida 33132-1693
RE: Thank you, thank you.
Sirs,
“UNDER THE BAY TUNNEL”
TODAY
PAGE 1
THE MIAMI HERALD
“UNDER THE BAY TUNNEL”
TODAY
PAGE 2
THE MIAMI HERALD
Thanks – twice – for clearing that up.
I thought – briefly – that it was the OVER THE BAY TUNNEL that was being scrapped. Speaking of which can you tell me where to find an OVER THE BAY TUNNEL? Google seems to know not whereof you speak.
Thanks again.
The Miami Herald
One Herald Plaza
Miami, Florida 33132-1693
RE: Thank you, thank you.
Sirs,
“UNDER THE BAY TUNNEL”
TODAY
PAGE 1
THE MIAMI HERALD
“UNDER THE BAY TUNNEL”
TODAY
PAGE 2
THE MIAMI HERALD
Thanks – twice – for clearing that up.
I thought – briefly – that it was the OVER THE BAY TUNNEL that was being scrapped. Speaking of which can you tell me where to find an OVER THE BAY TUNNEL? Google seems to know not whereof you speak.
Thanks again.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
He hasn't ven been sworn in yet
December 10, 2008
Governor Blago, Chicago, corruption, the old days in New Jersey, & the President
Just because he has hair that suggests a Satanic connection and just because he calls the President [elect] a “*otherfucker” are no reasons to indict him.
All the mush brained toads who are modern American Liberals were achingly tumescent when Fitzgerald, the United States Attorney – “Merry Fitzmas”, remember? - Oh, I forgot. Silly me! He was after Scooter Libby and Darth Vader Cheney then. It’s OK when they’re Republicans, right? Dreams of sugar plumbs and frog marching for Christmas, remember?
Jon Corzine bought a Senate seat in New Jersey in 2000.
Governor Blago tried to sell a Senate seat in Illinois in 2008.
The difference is…is…what?
Just like a not so silent fart in church the toxic aroma is going all the way to the White House.
What did the President [elect] know and when did he know it?
Governor Blago tried to get his wife a $250,000 a year job
Michelle Obama got a $200,000 a year raise when her husband was elected to the United States Senate. He got her employer a $1,000,000 a year earmark. If you say coincidence stop reading and try to find the nearest tooth fairy.
It is inconceivable that a Cook County community organizer – that sounds better than ward heeler or hack, doesn’t it? – could get from Chicago to the Illinois state senate in Springfield to the United States Senate to the White House without – A – having played the Chicago game or – B – known the rules of the Chicago game or – C – worst of all, thinking he could tip toe through the great lake of offal and not get any shit on his shoes.
If he didn’t know it he was a HORSE’S ASS. If he knew it and did nothing he is a SMARMY BASTARD.
If you believe that he didn’t know then you are comfortable believing that he sat in Pastor Wrong Wright’s church for 20 years and only heard Kumbaya and We Shall Overcome. It was the Saturday PM services where Whitey was the bad guy and Amerika sucks.
If you believe he didn’t know then you are comfortable believing that Bill Ayers never told him how to make a Molotov Cocktail. We know Bill the Bomber told him it's OK to send your kids to private school. Public schools in Chicago are for kids from the projects. Same in Washington.
The collateral damage caused by Governor Blago is that it knocks New Jersey off as being the top dog of corruption. As a proud son of Bayonne it was an honor that I am saddened. It was an honor that I cherished.
Where else could a college student go from being a bag man for Union City pols to the United States Senate?
If you were on the public payroll in Hudson County Mayor Hague got 3% of your gross pay. He knew that that was a big chunk. Benevolent despot that he was he got Beneficial Finance to come into Hudson County to help the employees live up to their obligation to the “Big Guy”. The pol who knocked off Hague – John V. Kenny – was the “Little Guy”. Only 7-11or Dunkin Donuts could rival Beneficial for locations.
The Hudson County jail was known as the Taj Mahal.
The Hudson County Police, as opposed to the Hudson County Park Police, and I am not making this up, the Hudson County Boulevard Police, was known as Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves. The Hudson County Boulevard is 16 miles long and 20 yards wide. It had its own police force.
The Regular Democratic Organization had Row A in every election from 1916 to 1977. The odds of that happening by coincidence are about the same as a group of Mormons converting Ayrabs in Mecca.
I remember the Jersey City Board of Education accepting bids of $5,000 for storm windows, $4,500 for teachers’ desks, and $900 for class room waste baskets. It was 1958.
At one point there were more Hudson County mayors in jail than not.
A border line boob was sworn in as County Superintendent of Weights and Measures. After the ceremony he was asked how many ounces were in a gallon. “Give me a break, guys. It’s only my first day on the job.”
The Hudson County mortician exponentially increased his income by doubling up. He put 2 indigent stiffs into one box. 3 was a bit much because it required limb rearrangement.
A Jersey City Mayor, in a fit of frugality, shut down the Department of Psychiatry at the Medical Center. “We’ll have none of that voo-doo here.”
Uniformed police and firemen would line the hallway at various polling places. They thought it was their civic duty to inform the electorate about the candidates. Palm cards were available for the confused. Bullet voting still was in vogue.
“Dead men walking” was a common sight at election time. Why should death prevent voting?
The way Bayonne split the Black vote in 1964 is still a classic example of quiet discrimination. The lines were drawn to cut Black influence in half. Then Bayonne urban renewaled them out of town. Classic. Bayonne’s contingent of mush brained modern American Liberals kept all the Black and White Together nonsense in Mississippi and Alabama.
The upper income Negroes in Bayonne lived on West 44th Street. The majority of the other Negroes lived on either side of Avenue C from 18th Street to 26th Street. When Bayonne changed its form of government from commission to council it disregarded the plan drawn up by the non-partisan board. It used Avenue C as the East West dividing line. That cut the Negro soon to be Black vote in half. Then the city sold the apartments that they lived in replacing them with town houses and two family homes the prices of which precluded the previous tenants from buying.
Modern American Liberalism at its best!
Back to Chicago.
What did the President [elect] know and when did he know it?
Since it was acceptable to use Hitler as a base line when talking about President Bush it is fair, very fair, to ask if Hitler knew of Eichmann’s daily schedule. Also, if he knew about all the Eichmann wanabees.
B. Hussein Obama was a community organizer in Chicago. Absent 2 degrees from Ivy League schools and he would be known as a ward heeler. His career goals would have revolved around being Deputy Registrar of Deeds. Maybe some decent tickets for Da Bares or Da Bulls. He had the great good sense to be at the right corner when the right bus came along. He had the better sense to get on it.
A certain glibness like the guy shilling blenders on the midway coupled with enormous amounts of White guilt combined with a media that would have killed for him and an astonishing ability to fill 6 inside straights and his next stop is 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Big Mike was right: “What a country!’
Every free turkey, every ticket that disappeared, every emergency sewer job, every summer job for Junior, every winter job for Dad, everything came from the Daley machine. “Marley is dead” is the opening line of “A Christmas Carol”. Everything flows from that just like getting ahead in Chicago flows from the Daley machine.
He went from demanding larger turkeys to the state House to the United States Senate to the White House. It all started with a free turkey.
Governor Blago, a man who gives new meaning to “He would steal a hot stove”, is now in the Hall of Fame for pols who couldn’t lie straight in bed. Special mention should be made of his wife. As foul mouthed a bitch who ever hornswoggled a pol with her vertical smile she makes Lucrezia Borgia look like a minor league Mother Teresa. A mating of vipers!
From whence came the Chosen One?
Kerner, West, Reynolds, Rostenkowski, Riley – all legatees of the Daley machine, all typical Cook County pols, jail birds all. The same machine that gives us the Chosen One.
In 20 years B. Hussein Obama went from fixing tickets and giving out free turkeys to the White House.
Did he know directly of Governor Blago’s latest shakedown request? Probably not. That’s why he brought Rahm Emanuel, his Frank Nitti, with him.
Speaking of turkeys, I wonder what kind of sound Rezko is making now?
Sometimes a free turkey can be very expensive.
Welcome to 4 years worth of a SMARMY BASTARD. If I’m wrong it will be 4 years of a HORSE’S ASS. Clinton or Carter?
Does President Bambi have any brothers?
Will Travelocity book the Lincoln Bedroom?
I miss Hudson County.
Governor Blago, Chicago, corruption, the old days in New Jersey, & the President
Just because he has hair that suggests a Satanic connection and just because he calls the President [elect] a “*otherfucker” are no reasons to indict him.
All the mush brained toads who are modern American Liberals were achingly tumescent when Fitzgerald, the United States Attorney – “Merry Fitzmas”, remember? - Oh, I forgot. Silly me! He was after Scooter Libby and Darth Vader Cheney then. It’s OK when they’re Republicans, right? Dreams of sugar plumbs and frog marching for Christmas, remember?
Jon Corzine bought a Senate seat in New Jersey in 2000.
Governor Blago tried to sell a Senate seat in Illinois in 2008.
The difference is…is…what?
Just like a not so silent fart in church the toxic aroma is going all the way to the White House.
What did the President [elect] know and when did he know it?
Governor Blago tried to get his wife a $250,000 a year job
Michelle Obama got a $200,000 a year raise when her husband was elected to the United States Senate. He got her employer a $1,000,000 a year earmark. If you say coincidence stop reading and try to find the nearest tooth fairy.
It is inconceivable that a Cook County community organizer – that sounds better than ward heeler or hack, doesn’t it? – could get from Chicago to the Illinois state senate in Springfield to the United States Senate to the White House without – A – having played the Chicago game or – B – known the rules of the Chicago game or – C – worst of all, thinking he could tip toe through the great lake of offal and not get any shit on his shoes.
If he didn’t know it he was a HORSE’S ASS. If he knew it and did nothing he is a SMARMY BASTARD.
If you believe that he didn’t know then you are comfortable believing that he sat in Pastor Wrong Wright’s church for 20 years and only heard Kumbaya and We Shall Overcome. It was the Saturday PM services where Whitey was the bad guy and Amerika sucks.
If you believe he didn’t know then you are comfortable believing that Bill Ayers never told him how to make a Molotov Cocktail. We know Bill the Bomber told him it's OK to send your kids to private school. Public schools in Chicago are for kids from the projects. Same in Washington.
The collateral damage caused by Governor Blago is that it knocks New Jersey off as being the top dog of corruption. As a proud son of Bayonne it was an honor that I am saddened. It was an honor that I cherished.
Where else could a college student go from being a bag man for Union City pols to the United States Senate?
If you were on the public payroll in Hudson County Mayor Hague got 3% of your gross pay. He knew that that was a big chunk. Benevolent despot that he was he got Beneficial Finance to come into Hudson County to help the employees live up to their obligation to the “Big Guy”. The pol who knocked off Hague – John V. Kenny – was the “Little Guy”. Only 7-11or Dunkin Donuts could rival Beneficial for locations.
The Hudson County jail was known as the Taj Mahal.
The Hudson County Police, as opposed to the Hudson County Park Police, and I am not making this up, the Hudson County Boulevard Police, was known as Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves. The Hudson County Boulevard is 16 miles long and 20 yards wide. It had its own police force.
The Regular Democratic Organization had Row A in every election from 1916 to 1977. The odds of that happening by coincidence are about the same as a group of Mormons converting Ayrabs in Mecca.
I remember the Jersey City Board of Education accepting bids of $5,000 for storm windows, $4,500 for teachers’ desks, and $900 for class room waste baskets. It was 1958.
At one point there were more Hudson County mayors in jail than not.
A border line boob was sworn in as County Superintendent of Weights and Measures. After the ceremony he was asked how many ounces were in a gallon. “Give me a break, guys. It’s only my first day on the job.”
The Hudson County mortician exponentially increased his income by doubling up. He put 2 indigent stiffs into one box. 3 was a bit much because it required limb rearrangement.
A Jersey City Mayor, in a fit of frugality, shut down the Department of Psychiatry at the Medical Center. “We’ll have none of that voo-doo here.”
Uniformed police and firemen would line the hallway at various polling places. They thought it was their civic duty to inform the electorate about the candidates. Palm cards were available for the confused. Bullet voting still was in vogue.
“Dead men walking” was a common sight at election time. Why should death prevent voting?
The way Bayonne split the Black vote in 1964 is still a classic example of quiet discrimination. The lines were drawn to cut Black influence in half. Then Bayonne urban renewaled them out of town. Classic. Bayonne’s contingent of mush brained modern American Liberals kept all the Black and White Together nonsense in Mississippi and Alabama.
The upper income Negroes in Bayonne lived on West 44th Street. The majority of the other Negroes lived on either side of Avenue C from 18th Street to 26th Street. When Bayonne changed its form of government from commission to council it disregarded the plan drawn up by the non-partisan board. It used Avenue C as the East West dividing line. That cut the Negro soon to be Black vote in half. Then the city sold the apartments that they lived in replacing them with town houses and two family homes the prices of which precluded the previous tenants from buying.
Modern American Liberalism at its best!
Back to Chicago.
What did the President [elect] know and when did he know it?
Since it was acceptable to use Hitler as a base line when talking about President Bush it is fair, very fair, to ask if Hitler knew of Eichmann’s daily schedule. Also, if he knew about all the Eichmann wanabees.
B. Hussein Obama was a community organizer in Chicago. Absent 2 degrees from Ivy League schools and he would be known as a ward heeler. His career goals would have revolved around being Deputy Registrar of Deeds. Maybe some decent tickets for Da Bares or Da Bulls. He had the great good sense to be at the right corner when the right bus came along. He had the better sense to get on it.
A certain glibness like the guy shilling blenders on the midway coupled with enormous amounts of White guilt combined with a media that would have killed for him and an astonishing ability to fill 6 inside straights and his next stop is 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Big Mike was right: “What a country!’
Every free turkey, every ticket that disappeared, every emergency sewer job, every summer job for Junior, every winter job for Dad, everything came from the Daley machine. “Marley is dead” is the opening line of “A Christmas Carol”. Everything flows from that just like getting ahead in Chicago flows from the Daley machine.
He went from demanding larger turkeys to the state House to the United States Senate to the White House. It all started with a free turkey.
Governor Blago, a man who gives new meaning to “He would steal a hot stove”, is now in the Hall of Fame for pols who couldn’t lie straight in bed. Special mention should be made of his wife. As foul mouthed a bitch who ever hornswoggled a pol with her vertical smile she makes Lucrezia Borgia look like a minor league Mother Teresa. A mating of vipers!
From whence came the Chosen One?
Kerner, West, Reynolds, Rostenkowski, Riley – all legatees of the Daley machine, all typical Cook County pols, jail birds all. The same machine that gives us the Chosen One.
In 20 years B. Hussein Obama went from fixing tickets and giving out free turkeys to the White House.
Did he know directly of Governor Blago’s latest shakedown request? Probably not. That’s why he brought Rahm Emanuel, his Frank Nitti, with him.
Speaking of turkeys, I wonder what kind of sound Rezko is making now?
Sometimes a free turkey can be very expensive.
Welcome to 4 years worth of a SMARMY BASTARD. If I’m wrong it will be 4 years of a HORSE’S ASS. Clinton or Carter?
Does President Bambi have any brothers?
Will Travelocity book the Lincoln Bedroom?
I miss Hudson County.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Carl Hiaasen, The Miami Herald
December 7, 2008
Carl Hiaasen
The Miami Herald
One Herald Plaza
Miami, Florida 33132-1693
RE: “Big Sugar” – Sweet or Reckless? – Some comments on your revealing column this morning on what a government should do
Mr. Hiaasen,
And the great good fortune of being born and raised in Bayonne, New Jersey is again shown in your column.
You speak of the Everglades as if they were my granddaughters. In New Jersey we know them – not Caitlin, not Caroline, not Julia – for what they are: swamps.
Eyetie gangsters, turnpike bond hucksters, fraternity pledges with a paint can, lonely radio stations – Who else would go there? Mosquitoes in the summer, fish with three eyes, ducks that fly backwards, a failed bent nose.
Let a peripatetic panther snatch a child from a Westin backyard and the panther problem will be solved by 50 A-10 Warthogs emptying their 30 millimeter cannons on anything that moves. About a week’s worth of sorties would solve that problem.
I read, with growing amusement, of your tale of almost woe about what “Big Sugar” did, can do, will do to Florida in the deal to “restore” the Everglades.
[Would it be a sign of my naïveté to ask “restore” to what?]
Anyway, I’m chuckling just short of borborygymous eructations when I get to the “chilling effect” or, perhaps, the “slippery slope” throwaway phrase, a phrase so common to modern American Liberals, statists all, “until the state cracks down”.
Up until the true colors were revealed it was a tale told by typical mush brained modern American Liberals. Did I just repeat myself?
Then it was revealed.
“Until the state cracks down…”
Should we send the Board of Big Sugar to Camp Gitmo?
Should we send their lawyers and lobbyists to Abu Ghraib?
What the Hell do you mean when you say “crack down”?
Is it OK to “crack down” when we want to help manatees? Is it not OK to “crack down” when we wish to enforce the laws concerning illegal aliens? Is there a meter to determine intentions when we choose which laws to enforce?
Lincoln suspended the writ of habeas corpus. That was an example of a pretty strong “crack down”. Maybe we should have “cracked down” before 12/7/41. Maybe we should have “cracked down” before 9/11/01.
Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
PS – How about this for a “crack down”? Everybody knows that tobacco is evil. If we cannot ban the sale of it in this state how about banning the sale of it in drug stores and food stores? Would not the public be served, indeed well served, by this?
Carl Hiaasen
The Miami Herald
One Herald Plaza
Miami, Florida 33132-1693
RE: “Big Sugar” – Sweet or Reckless? – Some comments on your revealing column this morning on what a government should do
Mr. Hiaasen,
And the great good fortune of being born and raised in Bayonne, New Jersey is again shown in your column.
You speak of the Everglades as if they were my granddaughters. In New Jersey we know them – not Caitlin, not Caroline, not Julia – for what they are: swamps.
Eyetie gangsters, turnpike bond hucksters, fraternity pledges with a paint can, lonely radio stations – Who else would go there? Mosquitoes in the summer, fish with three eyes, ducks that fly backwards, a failed bent nose.
Let a peripatetic panther snatch a child from a Westin backyard and the panther problem will be solved by 50 A-10 Warthogs emptying their 30 millimeter cannons on anything that moves. About a week’s worth of sorties would solve that problem.
I read, with growing amusement, of your tale of almost woe about what “Big Sugar” did, can do, will do to Florida in the deal to “restore” the Everglades.
[Would it be a sign of my naïveté to ask “restore” to what?]
Anyway, I’m chuckling just short of borborygymous eructations when I get to the “chilling effect” or, perhaps, the “slippery slope” throwaway phrase, a phrase so common to modern American Liberals, statists all, “until the state cracks down”.
Up until the true colors were revealed it was a tale told by typical mush brained modern American Liberals. Did I just repeat myself?
Then it was revealed.
“Until the state cracks down…”
Should we send the Board of Big Sugar to Camp Gitmo?
Should we send their lawyers and lobbyists to Abu Ghraib?
What the Hell do you mean when you say “crack down”?
Is it OK to “crack down” when we want to help manatees? Is it not OK to “crack down” when we wish to enforce the laws concerning illegal aliens? Is there a meter to determine intentions when we choose which laws to enforce?
Lincoln suspended the writ of habeas corpus. That was an example of a pretty strong “crack down”. Maybe we should have “cracked down” before 12/7/41. Maybe we should have “cracked down” before 9/11/01.
Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
PS – How about this for a “crack down”? Everybody knows that tobacco is evil. If we cannot ban the sale of it in this state how about banning the sale of it in drug stores and food stores? Would not the public be served, indeed well served, by this?
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
A New Way To Pick A Mayor
November 29, 2008
Letters to the Editor
The Miami Herald
One Herald Plaza
Miami, Florida 33132-1693
RE: Local Perspectives – A new way to pick a mayor
Sirs,
How can you not love this place?
Broward County, the Petri dish of modern American Liberalism, has been the cheerleader for the chorale of Jeremiads about stolen elections since 2000. The Republicans stole the election! The Republicans stole the election! The lyrics are the same. The music is rap, Gregorian chant, reggae, blue grass, inter alia.
It is well to note that the Torquemada chosen to investigate voting irregularities in 2000 was Daley, son of THE Daley, and a man who knew that the thing about recounts was that you counted and counted until you got the count you wanted. His selection was beyond parody. Also, it was impossible to satirize. Why? Because the toads in the 4th Estate wanted to believe that the fix was in.
This brings us back to Sunrise.
You may recall that President-elect Obama, on one of his tours around this 57 or 58 state country, called it Sunshine. Not once, not twice, but three times. Imagine if Sarah Palin had done that. MSNBC would have tried to Baker Act her.
One of the solutions to disputed elections, to cantankerous recounts, to the wrong people getting elected is simple. The test run in Sunrise, if successful, may well become the paradigmatic template of modern American Liberalism.
If you think the results of the election will not be to your liking cancel it.
Mayor Steven Feren of Sunrise was sent to the Bench by the electorate. He resigned. Deputy Mayor Roger Wishner, coached by Hinnisy, the famous publican, “saw his opportunities and he took’em”.
A word about Wishner is in order.
A few years ago then Commissioner Wishner filed a police complaint alleging that he was assaulted at a Commission meeting. In a heated exchange with another Commissioner, David Harlem, Wishner claimed that Harlem pointed his index finger at him and pulled it like a trigger.
A trait common to modern American Liberals is that while they love protests – drowning polar bears, the Dalai Lama, teenage obesity, “Don’t let’s be nasty to the WOGS”, things like that – they don’t want debate. It makes no difference whether the debate is intramural, intermural, extramural, or sansmural. Once the official line is established there is to be no deviance. That’s why Dr. Mengele would do well in a primary in Broward County. His progressive views on abortion, predicated for the most part on the works of Margaret Sanger a heroine to most modern American Liberals, would sway many voters.
If Commissioner Harlem had used his middle finger it would have had First Amendment protection. By using his index finger he stirred the pot about the Second Amendment.
Is there a modern American Liberal anywhere who does not become tumescent at the thought of disarming the Second Amendment? An index finger is a 50 caliber sniper rifle. A fist is a neutron bomb.
Stuart Michelson, Esq., the city attorney, doubtless acting under instructions from George Soros and Keith Olberman, canceled the election. He then anointed Roger Wishner Mayor for Life. No muss, no fuss, and no chance of the wrong guy getting in. According to confidential sources the Obama administration is studying this new method of choosing leaders very closely.
“All evidence is circumstantial”, said Bertie.
“Yes”, said Jeeves, “especially when
you find the trout in the milk.”
Stuart Michelson, Esq. is paid $8300 a week to represent Sunrise. [Sunrise, Sunset. No big deal.] That amount does no include expenses. Ski masks, shotguns, jimmies, shivs, crowbars – traditional burglary tools – are excluded from reimbursable disbursements.
The annual retainer, $432,000, was agreed to by the Sunrise commission.
I’m from Hudson County, New Jersey. Naïveté is beaten out of children. The fact that Roger Wishner, a man afraid of raised fingers, cast the deciding vote that gave Stuart Michelson, Esq. $432,000 a year is one of those things that just happened. Michelson the lawyer gets more than 8 grand a week and Wishner gets the crown. It’s just a coincidence. It happens as often as an Ice Age.
Next they’ll get the trains to run on time
Letters to the Editor
The Miami Herald
One Herald Plaza
Miami, Florida 33132-1693
RE: Local Perspectives – A new way to pick a mayor
Sirs,
How can you not love this place?
Broward County, the Petri dish of modern American Liberalism, has been the cheerleader for the chorale of Jeremiads about stolen elections since 2000. The Republicans stole the election! The Republicans stole the election! The lyrics are the same. The music is rap, Gregorian chant, reggae, blue grass, inter alia.
It is well to note that the Torquemada chosen to investigate voting irregularities in 2000 was Daley, son of THE Daley, and a man who knew that the thing about recounts was that you counted and counted until you got the count you wanted. His selection was beyond parody. Also, it was impossible to satirize. Why? Because the toads in the 4th Estate wanted to believe that the fix was in.
This brings us back to Sunrise.
You may recall that President-elect Obama, on one of his tours around this 57 or 58 state country, called it Sunshine. Not once, not twice, but three times. Imagine if Sarah Palin had done that. MSNBC would have tried to Baker Act her.
One of the solutions to disputed elections, to cantankerous recounts, to the wrong people getting elected is simple. The test run in Sunrise, if successful, may well become the paradigmatic template of modern American Liberalism.
If you think the results of the election will not be to your liking cancel it.
Mayor Steven Feren of Sunrise was sent to the Bench by the electorate. He resigned. Deputy Mayor Roger Wishner, coached by Hinnisy, the famous publican, “saw his opportunities and he took’em”.
A word about Wishner is in order.
A few years ago then Commissioner Wishner filed a police complaint alleging that he was assaulted at a Commission meeting. In a heated exchange with another Commissioner, David Harlem, Wishner claimed that Harlem pointed his index finger at him and pulled it like a trigger.
A trait common to modern American Liberals is that while they love protests – drowning polar bears, the Dalai Lama, teenage obesity, “Don’t let’s be nasty to the WOGS”, things like that – they don’t want debate. It makes no difference whether the debate is intramural, intermural, extramural, or sansmural. Once the official line is established there is to be no deviance. That’s why Dr. Mengele would do well in a primary in Broward County. His progressive views on abortion, predicated for the most part on the works of Margaret Sanger a heroine to most modern American Liberals, would sway many voters.
If Commissioner Harlem had used his middle finger it would have had First Amendment protection. By using his index finger he stirred the pot about the Second Amendment.
Is there a modern American Liberal anywhere who does not become tumescent at the thought of disarming the Second Amendment? An index finger is a 50 caliber sniper rifle. A fist is a neutron bomb.
Stuart Michelson, Esq., the city attorney, doubtless acting under instructions from George Soros and Keith Olberman, canceled the election. He then anointed Roger Wishner Mayor for Life. No muss, no fuss, and no chance of the wrong guy getting in. According to confidential sources the Obama administration is studying this new method of choosing leaders very closely.
“All evidence is circumstantial”, said Bertie.
“Yes”, said Jeeves, “especially when
you find the trout in the milk.”
Stuart Michelson, Esq. is paid $8300 a week to represent Sunrise. [Sunrise, Sunset. No big deal.] That amount does no include expenses. Ski masks, shotguns, jimmies, shivs, crowbars – traditional burglary tools – are excluded from reimbursable disbursements.
The annual retainer, $432,000, was agreed to by the Sunrise commission.
I’m from Hudson County, New Jersey. Naïveté is beaten out of children. The fact that Roger Wishner, a man afraid of raised fingers, cast the deciding vote that gave Stuart Michelson, Esq. $432,000 a year is one of those things that just happened. Michelson the lawyer gets more than 8 grand a week and Wishner gets the crown. It’s just a coincidence. It happens as often as an Ice Age.
Next they’ll get the trains to run on time
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