Representative Jim Waldman

April 24, 2010

Representative Jim Waldman
313 House Office
412 South Monroe Street
Tallahassee, FL 32399-1300

RE: Democracy – Ain’t it grand?

Representative Waldman,

Laying aside the evils of tobacco, the coming pandemic of teenage obesity, the premise that teachers should be held to the same standards set for football coaches, the continuing heartbreak of psoriasis, the transformational change of American foreign policy towards Israel, the continuing pox visited on Florida by the merde-filled Quebecois and what any legislature can do about them I suggest yet another candidate for your political unicorn farm.

The Miami Herald shows you objecting to the never ending briar patch of redistricting. My faith in the tooth fairy and believing financial projections about any public program is strengthened whenever a supposedly rational adult says that the process should be “non-political”.

May I suggest that someone – how about you? – acknowledge the 800 pound gorilla sitting in the corner?

Baker v Carr be damned but there was a deal struck between urban Black and non-urban Whites that validated some of the premises set forth in The Federalist Papers.

I can’t speak for the needle toothed banjo strumming boy on the porch Deliverance districts. I can see that there are districts here that would elect O.J. Simpson or Michael Jackson. Taking a cue from the Gomers in North Korea or maybe giving them some ideas the Kennedys and the Meeks hand out legislative seats that would have made Trollope proud.

How the common weal is advanced by this is beyond me.

I must admit that there are some modern American Liberal Jewish districts in Broward County that would vote for Dr. Mengele because of his progressive views on abortion.

Here’s a plan.

Pick a geometric shape.

Circle, square, rhomboid, inter alia

Since only the Census is constitutionally mandated to conduct an exact head count maybe statistical sampling could be used. Whatever method is used on Sistrunk Boulevard must be used in areas where feral pigs are house pets. Use those shapes to redraw district lines.

Let free men decide!


Kevin Smith


PS – As a righteous gentile I wonder if you have had any contact with former Congressman “Toad” Wexler. How is his new job at the Lions and Lambs Institute working out?