December 11, 2014
Chris Cilliza
The Washington Post
1150 15th St. NW
Washington, DC 20071

RE: Knotted DC knickers – Some comments on your take on the public reaction to what 2 teenagers did when their father pardoned a turkey.

Mr. Cilliza,

Every father of every teenage daughter knows the “look”. Whether she lives in the White House and her father has access to nuclear weapons or she lives in Bug Fug, Kentucky and her father is an out of work coal miner because an unexperienced layabout boob in DC wants to save polar bears the “look” is the same.

Trust me. Having your father pardon a turkey only makes it worse.

I recall with warm memories sweeping over me like a swarm of tumescent fire ants the trips to the mall for “a” dress, for “the” dress, for “any” dress. The best part came at the cash register.

The only way it could be worse would have been if Dad said that you had to go to one of the really fine public schools in DC.

You say, with neither nary a hint of irony nor a tinge of sarcasm, that “one of the few adhered-to-commandments of political Washington” is “Thou shalt not talk about politicians’’ children”.

With the age restraints in mind I guess that made it OK to say that Sarah Palin should be sodomized by crack heads as penance for her errant ways.

Why didn’t the rule and the outrage, the protective outrage, apply to Sarah Palin’s pre-pubescent daughter when it was suggested by big time media players that she be “entertained” by uber-macho professional athletes?

Eclectic indignation, as in the above described incidents, is no longer sufficient to describe the actions of modern American Liberals when it comes to subjective comments. High dudgeon for the children of media favorites and disdain for the children of “bitter clingers” is the rule.

The facts would suggest that “hypocritical bastard” would be the best term for you. “Lower than a heaping helping of eel shit” was a close second.

Congratulations to this week’s “Turd in the Punchbowl” winner.


Kevin Smith

PS – Speaking of outrage, it costs $2,000 a week, every week, for the Obama girls to go to school. Does anyone want to bet that the lunch menu does not have tofu fingers and kale sorbet on it?