September 3, 2014
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
Berger Singerman
350 E. Las Olas Blvd.
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301

RE “Guide for the Perplexed”? Mite auxilium!

Mr. Berger,

Although I am not Jewish the man who founded my Church was. Indeed, I am proud to say that many of my friends, especially some of my best friends, are Jewish.

So when I heard the President of the United States say last week that he “had no strategy” I was dumbfounded. Even if he didn’t why in the name of History would he say that? Franklin Roosevelt sent Chester Nimitz to Pearl Harbor on Christmas, 1941 with the following strategy: “Don’t come back until you’ve won.” Admiral William Halsey had a strategy of broadcasting his position in plain language if he had not contacted the enemy in 3 days.

Then I heard the Vice President of the United States say it was time to “take our country back”. Now that’s a strategy. Even though the Attorney General of the United States said 2 weeks ago that saying “take our country back’ is prima facie proof of racism that didn’t stop Curley. [I call him Curley in honor of the smartest Stooge. By the by, his classmates at Auchmere Academy, a posh prep school on par with, I don’t know, the Buckley School, called him Cheese Dick. Even though the only “blue collar” this ninny saw there was from Brooks Brothers, Polo not yet having arrived, or the guy stoking the furnace, he the mAL friend of the working class. Go figure.]

Then I heard the President of the United States imitating Mrs. Clinton when she took a futile White modern American Liberal middle-aged calorically challenged yenta stab at trying to sound like she grew up in Liberty City. [Another trait common to mALs is the duo of having no shame plus the impossibility of ever embarrassing them]

Can you believe that Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman-Medusa, the official shill for the Democratic Party, expanded her spiel by announcing that, having eaten M&Ms and having drunk Coca-Cola for 10 years, her brand loyalty was rewarded with cancer?

It that’s true we can save a barge filled with dough by shutting down the Sylvester Clinic at the University of Miami, Sloane-Kettering and the Langone Clinics in Manhattan, M.S. Anderson in Houston, and MD Farber in Boston.

All those years, all those patients, all that chemo, all that jazz about cancer being cured when all along it was right in front of us.

She doesn’t say if all M&Ms were carcinogenic or just the peanut ones.

I said, half-jokingly, that your penance would be to ride down Las Olas Boulevard, tied to a mule and facing backwards, so the children could pelt you with flaming bags of cat shit. That’s a strategy.

Get 3 more.

One for the President, one for the Vice President, and one for the Attorney General. You’ll have to double up with Debbie. That’s another strategy.

Since you mentioned Churchill there is a needed addendum.

Chamberlain in Parliament said the Czechs were “a faraway people of whom we know little”. Churchill said that we had to choose “between shame and war and having chosen shame we will have war”.

5 years ago the President went all over Wogsville apologizing for supposed sins 1,000 years old. He said that if you “unclench your fist we will extend our hand”. The Arab Spring died aborning. So much for that strategy.

Perhaps he may want to pardon Sirhan Sirhan. No one in this country has been imprisoned longer for the same type of crime. Free him for the sake of peace. Take a chance. That’s a strategy

Kipling was one of Churchill’s favorite poets. He warned against “paying the Dane his geld”. That was then; this is now.

Strategy, strategy. My kingdom for a strategy.

The Clerk implores God to bless the United States as the Supreme Court comes to order. When have we ever needed God’s blessings more than now?

Kevin Smith

PS – Speaking of strategy, the takeover of Chrysler by Fiat is now complete. Thus we have a former iconic American company, now owned by an Italian company, making Jeeps in China. The Eye-Ties are doing un grande tarantella because it was financed by the American taxpayer. Talk about strategy! Maybe we can get the Shias interested in bringing a resurrected Solyndra to Detroit. If we could get the Sunnis interested we could have a bidding war. “I’ll retire to Bedlam.” Now that’s a strategy.