August 16, 2015

Rosemary O’Hara – Editorial Page Editor

The Sun Sentinel

500 E Broward Blvd #500

Ft. Lauderdale, FL  33394

RE: America is still the land of the second chance. Now will you do the right thing?

Ms. O’Hara,

Broward County is the petri dish of modern American Liberalism. The only way a Republican becomes a county commissioner is if his Democratic predecessor goes to jail. If the Governor is Republican he then gets to put in one of his own.

Broward County even helped send an impeached and convicted Federal Judge to Congress. Of course, the fact that a seat was crafted for him that would have sent OJ Simpson, Bill Cosby, or Step-n-Fetchit to D.C. is glossed over. Paraphrasing Orwell, all candidates are equal but some candidates are more equal than others which is how Alcee Hastings got to Congress. Even though the Constitution has some strong words about nobility it didn’t prevent Congresswoman Carrie Meek from using primogeniture without dying to get her cement-headed son into Congress.

And the people cheered.

We are at the point where I announce that I was born and raised in Hudson County, New Jersey – Bayonne to be exact. That means, inter alia, that it ain’t how many people vote it’s the counting that counts. I know you can’t go home again but just to bring back a whiff of the old days I had 6 voter ID cards when Miriam Oliphant ran the elections bureau. If memory serves she was so dumb that she would get lost on any ladder with more than 2 steps.

And the people cheered.

In her case, a Black female with several degrees, “clean and articulate” to cite Vice President Curly Biden, was irresistible. [I call him Curly in honor of the smartest stooge] It proved to be a successful testing ground for 2008. 

“It’s for the children.” Cognitive dissonance on ideological steroids. Eclectic indignation. Constantly conflating correlation with causation. “There’s a new day coming.” Tautologies rule! Hope and Change. Manatee suffrage. Little Debbie Wasserman-Schultz. Cool the earth. Calm the seas. Save the whales.

Scratch that last one.

Save the polar bears

The science is “settled”. Let’s not bring up Ptolemy. His science was “settled” for 15 centuries, remember?

Polar bears are drowning because rich White folk demand that they live in a cocoon that is aggressively air-conditioned. By aggressive I mean hot showers must have an ambient temperature suitable for hanging meat. I understand that there is a test program to A/C tennis courts. If it works there Broward County will lead the way In A/Cing golf courses and cemeteries.

  The promise of bovine, orvine, canine, equine, and piscine eructations as an alternative fuel to make it cool and comfortable just hasn’t quite worked out the way modern American Liberals had wished, really wished, it would, has it? Only a cad would mention Solyndra. I’m not so I won’t.

Coal, dirty rotten coal, coal mined mostly by “bitter clinging”, gun loving, snake handling, Confederate flag waving, Dixie whistling red necks mine most of it. And deep down, who gives a shit about them?

I quickly add that coal mined by Tom Steyer, a great green guy, coal that would not be mined in this country because of its high sulfur, is OK. He sells it to 3^rd world counties inhabited by the “lesser breeds” and if mALs don’t care about American hillbillies they as sure don’t care about people who aren’t quite in step with indoor plumbing and teenage obesity and bullying.

He gives a lot of money to good guys and gals who support good causes. Otherwise they wouldn’t take the money, right?

Why are the words “friggin hypocrites” ringing in my ears?

I have been pleading with the Sun Sentinel to turn off all the A/Cs at world HQ. since 1998.

If you had the rest of Broward County would have followed forthwith. And they would have been happy to do so, right?

Now comes a chance to atone for you error of omission and do the right thing for an even better reason.

The New York Times and the Washington Post, national institutions that employed Walter Duranty and Janet Cook, just told us that A/C is anti-women. It is sexist per se. The reason is so obvious that it took a vast Right-Wing conspiracy, doubtless funded by the Koch Brothers, to keep it secret. 

Women, because they wear thinner garments, sometimes sleeveless, in the summer, are more easily afflicted with chilblains. Men wear suits and long sleeved shirts making them quite comfortable in the artificially A/Ced cooler indoor temperatures. Bloating, water retention, increased cellulite, and the potential heartbreak of psoriasis is their fate. Truly a war on women. 

Here’s a chance to undo the past and strike a blow for the bears and the chicks.

Kevin Smith

PS – Speaking of chicks, Little Debbie seems to have her knickers in a knot over the difference between Socialism and the Democratic Party. Could you get word to her that the leading Socialist of the 20^th century was Adolph Hitler? Also tell her that his favorite American was Margaret Sanger. Just tell her that he used her writings on euthanasia as the basis for his Nuremberg Race Laws of 1934. Certainly a Socialist to be proud of!

Should Bernie Sanders get the Democratic nomination the mystery will be if he is a true believer in the somewhat sensual salsa oriented Castro/Chavez school or the more stolid East German/Bulgarian school. Either way, if history is a guide, we are guaranteed to be farting through silk in 50 or 60 years. Maybe 80 or 90. Maybe more.  Scratch that. Never.

One more thing.

I didn’t realize that you were a closeted “Ditto Head”. The term “low information voter”, the one you used on the Michael Putney show this morning, is one of Rush Limbaugh’s favorite lines. He uses it to describe the people who support the ca-ca spewed by modern American Liberals. I hope you didn’t blow your cover

August 16, 2015

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel

Big Stein,

I am sorry that Little Stein is in “disfavor with fortune and men’s eyes”. I would have thought that the 7^th Annual Summer of Recovery would have enabled him to move out of your garage. I hear that Solyndra is coming back and that they are looking for people who are smart and not fools. You need but ask and I will put the word in for him. You can thank me later.

As an aside, if you can’t get hired at the minimum wage how will raising the minimum wage make you more employable? Get back to me on that one, please.

Maybe he could catch on with Uber.

Another small point…My copy of the Constitution does not mention, indeed it does not hint at, the right to abortion. The Supreme Court, relying on Justice Brennan’s ethereal “penumbras” and chimeric “emanations”, stuck it in by fiat. I quickly add that same sex marriage also escaped the Founders’ attention. Would not Logic dictate that if the court can “say” it the court can “unsay” it? Think Plessy v Ferguson.

Which brings us back to Iowa.

It is fascinating to watch the Americans decide how they wish to be governed. Sharp elbows, fingers in the eye, low blows, and half-truths abound as well they should. For 25 centuries – “Free men speak with free tongues” – was the ideal of the agora. Nowhere in History has it been upheld more than here. Clowns, fools, and gas bags shout because they can. And if George Soros and the Koch Brothers want to fund them to do so we are a better country for it.

I hope Bernie Sanders does well in Iowa. He may be Little Stein’s best hope to get a job.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

August 9, 2015

Len Boselovic

The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

34 Blvd of the Allies

Pittsburgh. PA 15222

RE: “Coal Wars” – Some comments on your review of – you guessed it – Big Coal in the Richard Martin book “Coal Wars” in today’s unlinkable Miami Herald.

Mr. Boselovic,

First, before I write anything else, please tell me that you and the author have turned off all your A/Cs.

Follow the bouncing ball. I’ll type slowly.

Half of the electricity produced in this country is used to run A/Cs. Approximately 40% of the power comes from burning coal. [With the exception of the high Sulphur coal mined by Tom Steyer, coal that could not be burned in this country, all coal, all the time is “dirty”. His coal is clean because of the eclectic indignation that is genetically encoded in modern American Liberals enables them to say without wetting their pants that Koch Brothers coal is dirty and Tom Steyer coal is clean because he is opposed to the Keystone pipeline. It sure as hell beats thinking.]

Thinking globally but acting locally, and with Logic as an unforgiving task master, please tell me that you have given up the temporary, totally narcissistic, pleasure of  artificial cooling, man-made and thus destructive and anti-polar bear, on a hot, humid, August day.

You have, haven’t you?

Thank God terms such as “hypocritical bastard” are still in vogue just in case.

As to solutions…

“- that China is a more dynamic, energetic

society accustomed to upheaval and is not

 encumbered by Democratic considerations.”

The Miami Herald

Today

Page 7M

An absolutely mind-boggling statement that is etched on the foreheads of modern American Liberals who wear it proudly like the mark of Cain.

Think Stalin. Think Hitler. Think Mao. 

They were all “unencumbered by Democratic considerations”, weren’t they?

You say “dinosaurs still walked the earth, gazing contentedly” as if no one who read it would Have heard of Jurassic Park – Parts 1 to 5.

There is no screen time for Elsie the Cow as a lovable 4 leaf clover munching ruminant going about the fromage making business. Just beyond the tall grass, down by the river in the bottom land sits a big assed, sharply toothed, fiercely fanged, feral predator that is looking for its next meal.

50 years ago this country started 2 wars. One ended 10 years later. It is remembered by a wall in Washington, DC.

The other one was started in Appalachia in coal country. If but a small portion of the money spent on that one had been spent on nuclear energy we could look at the troubles in the Middle East with a xenophobic indifference. 

We didn’t. If we had Black Lung would be remembered only in text books, just like leprosy and small pox. Plus, there would be a surfeit of polar bears trying to get into our country form the North in a most undocumented manner. 

Next on the list are cars and plastics.

Stay tuned.

Kevin Smith

August 9, 2015

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Lions and rich White guys – Some comments on your unlinkable column about the horror, the horror income inequality allowing rich White guys to act like they were Teddy Roosevelt as they hunt bears in Florida.

Big Stein,

Pop quiz.

What is the difference between Cecil the Lion and Planned Parenthood?

If Cecil kills you he will eat you.

Full disclosure demands that I tell you that I have twice eaten bear meat. [If it’s OK with you I’ll keep my whale meat dinner to myself] Also, I am one of the founders of Broward PETA - People eating tasty animals.

As to rich dentists hunting Cecil the lion and his noble kin I want you to give Little Stein, your perpetual college student son, a task. 

Tell him to go to the library, assuming his school has one, and bag all the Hemingway books, particularly the ones that that portray White 1%ers who conflate their rifles with guns. Woe betides the Cape buffalo or leopard that gets in his way. Like Viagra minus the need for a prescription. Take them to the vegan café and burn them being sure to do it in an environmentally sensitive manner.

As to the proposed bear hunt in Florida…

Maybe there are too many bears. Maybe not enough. Aristotle always sought the elusive balance in all things.

We are sure that there are far too many pythons sitting in the big swamp that is North and South of Alligator Alley. I read this morning of a woman having her arm torn off and eaten by an alligator in Central Florida.

Why don’t we license Florida’s Redskins to have bear versus python “Celebrity Death Matches” with the Florida panther as an occasional wild card?

Gaia would be pleased.

The modern American Liberal dudgeon meter went into the red zone over the killing of an apex predator. Perhaps we should focus on other Africans being killed so rich, mostly White First World 1%ers can feel warm and fuzzy about themselves.

2,000,000 sub-Saharan Black infants die from malaria each year.

Notwithstanding multi-degreed ohamadahns spouting clap trap about bed netting stopping this genocide we shut down the only guaranteed cure for this self-induced slaughter.

45 years ago, rich White guys in this country relied on absolute pseudo-science that was perpetrated by Rachel Carson, a world class charlatan. If charges can ever be brought against a dead person she should be disinterred and tried for mass murder. She killed 30 times the number of people that Eichmann was hanged for.

All of this was done for the protection – maybe – of a ferocious raptor known for non-vegan dinner requirements.

Not only did we ban the manufacturing of DDT in this country we banned its export licensing. If Black lives mattered we would not countenance the execution of 40,000 babies a week, each week. Every week. And yes, I have seen non-White infants die from malaria.

Put that on your wall.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – 40,000 a week! Margaret Sanger would be in rapture, particularly since they were culled from the “lesser breeds”.

August 9, 2015

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Lions and rich White guys – Some comments on your unlinkable column about the horror, the horror income inequality allowing rich White guys to act like they were Teddy Roosevelt as they hunt bears in Florida.

Big Stein,

Pop quiz.

What is the difference between Cecil the Lion and Planned Parenthood?

If Cecil kills you he will eat you.

Full disclosure demands that I tell you that I have twice eaten bear meat. [If it’s OK with you I’ll keep my whale meat dinner to myself] Also, I am one of the founders of Broward PETA - People eating tasty animals.

As to rich dentists hunting Cecil the lion and his noble kin I want you to give Little Stein, your perpetual college student son, a task. 

Tell him to go to the library, assuming his school has one, and bag all the Hemingway books, particularly the ones that that portray White 1%ers who conflate their rifles with guns. Woe betides the Cape buffalo or leopard that gets in his way. Like Viagra minus the need for a prescription. Take them to the vegan café and burn them being sure to do it in an environmentally sensitive manner.

As to the proposed bear hunt in Florida…

Maybe there are too many bears. Maybe not enough. Aristotle always sought the elusive balance in all things.

We are sure that there are far too many pythons sitting in the big swamp that is North and South of Alligator Alley. I read this morning of a woman having her arm torn off and eaten by an alligator in Central Florida.

Why don’t we license Florida’s Redskins to have bear versus python “Celebrity Death Matches” with the Florida panther as an occasional wild card?

Gaia would be pleased.

The modern American Liberal dudgeon meter went into the red zone over the killing of an apex predator. Perhaps we should focus on other Africans being killed so rich, mostly White First World 1%ers can feel warm and fuzzy about themselves.

2,000,000 sub-Saharan Black infants die from malaria each year.

Notwithstanding multi-degreed ohamadahns spouting clap trap about bed netting stopping this genocide we shut down the only guaranteed cure for this self-induced slaughter.

45 years ago, rich White guys in this country relied on absolute pseudo-science that was perpetrated by Rachel Carson, a world class charlatan. If charges can ever be brought against a dead person she should be disinterred and tried for mass murder. She killed 30 times the number of people that Eichmann was hanged for.

All of this was done for the protection – maybe – of a ferocious raptor known for non-vegan dinner requirements.

Not only did we ban the manufacturing of DDT in this country we banned its export licensing. If Black lives mattered we would not countenance the execution of 40,000 babies a week, each week. Every week. And yes, I have seen non-White infants die from malaria.

Put that on your wall.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – 40,000 a week! Margaret Sanger would be in rapture, particularly since they were culled from the “lesser breeds”.

August 9, 2015

Scott Taylor

The Sun Sentinel

RE: School bonds – A question or two about your story in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel about moneys unspent by the Broward County Board of Education.

Mr. Taylor,

3 points:

#1 – Has the entire $800,000,000 been raised? At 5% a year for 340 years the amount that should have been voted on is $2,000,000,000, not $800,000,000. To the original amount $1,200,000,000 in interest must be added. Think of it as a 30 year mortgage. The Federal Truth in Lending Law requires that the total amount of the loan must be disclosed to the borrower. Why wasn’t it?

#2 – You write that “$152,000 worth of computers and networks” has been received by the Hawkes Bluff School in Davie. Try to remember 1985. Glasnost. Star Wars, “less filling, more taste”, the Chicago Bears, VCRs. Imagine buying an IBM  PC Peanut, a Wang, or a Cryden. Maybe you got a Mac or an Atari. They all used floppy discs to save things. You got a good VCR. You got an upscale Polaroid camera. MRIs still weren’t covered by insurance. Cell phones cost $2,500 to buy and a gazillion a month to use them. Senator Alpha Gump had not yet invented the internet. You drove your Oldsmobile to Disney World. Your sister and her family flew down from NYC on Eastern Airlines. You put the bill on your Visa card. In less than 2 years the devices were obsolete. Not structurally, but in speed, memory, and performance. And you finally finished paying for them. Last month, to be precise. 

Slick trade.

“Experience is the only school where some people learn” is a truism still not believed. 

#3 – Why was the perfectly functional Fort Lauderdale High School torn up as if it had wondered into a Planned Parenthood clinic? Why was the old pool torn out and a new one put in? Was it leaking? Or did the prospect of spending other peoples’ money just overwhelm them? 

Is this the beginning of the Summer of Recovery or is it the end?

Kevin Smith

August 4, 2015

Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz

10100 Pines Blvd

Pembroke Pines, FL 33026

RE: If “putz “is gender specific “putzette” is OK with me

Little Debbie,

Norman Thomas             Bernie Sanders

                                Clement Atlee                 Neil Kinnock

                                George Bernard Shaw    Robert Owen

Your C.V. says you have 2 degrees, and in political science to boot, from Florida University. I say that because it is inconceivable that you could have earned 2 degrees from the University of Florida. Perhaps it was the Florida University of DIY Proctology. Perhaps it was the Florida University of Buncombe, Persiflage, and Prattle. Perhaps it was the modern American Liberal Florida University of Non-Malodorous Fecal Matter Syndrome.

I am going to use a big boy/big girl term here. It is empirically self-evident that since you are unfamiliar with socialism you are incapable of understanding the differences, if any, with it and the modern day Democratic Party.

The common denominator of all the above listed names is that they are all Socialists.

I know you don’t remember when Justice Potter Stewart said that while it was difficult for him to explain obscenity, particularly to boobs with cement heads – if the shoe fits, chickie – he “knew it when he saw it”.

                          Nehru                            Kosygin

                          Peron                            Kim Jong One, Two, Three

                                      Castro                           Pompidou

It is a trifle as to who owns the steel mill, who runs the radio stations, who hits the on switch at the power plant, or who decides what the hot fall colors will be and how far up or down ladies’ lines will go. These are after the fact details

There is only one step to take, one oath to swear to, one knee to bend to be a card carrying, fire breathing, means always justifying the ends,  Socialist.

“I swear to uphold the collective will of my betters,

 particularly when they are people of good will who are 

filled with passionate intensity to help others. If an individual

will not submit to the greater good he must be crushed.”

The word “crushed” is used because without the potential use of force the thing collapses. Ask Bukharin. Ask Trotsky. Ask Solzhenitsyn.  Ask Mindszenty. Ask Imre Nagy. Ask Alexander Dubcek. Ask Sakaharov. Ask Natansky. Ask Lech Walesa.

If they don’t return your calls taker a peek at OSHA, at the EPA, at the EEOC, at the FDA, at the IRS, at the NLRB, at the mockingly named Civil Rights Commission, at the BLM, at a government, any government, that regards the Rule of Law as a speed bump on the road to social justice, and to “all them corn fields and ballet at night”.

Mandela                Mugabe

                                Picasso                  Meir

                    Mussolini                Nasser

                    Abzug Fred Kite

All the above named people are Socialists. If History is a guide they share other common traits. #1 – They never let facts interfere with an argument and #2 – “The triumph of hope over experience” is the one thing that gets them through failure after failure after failure after failure of all their grand schemes. Sometimes water refuses to run up the hill. Sometimes it’s tough to get lambs to volunteer to lie down with lions even if Cecil is leading the Siren’s Song. “Hey! It’s only August. There is still time for the Summer of Recovery to get here, particularly if we really work hard.”

Sitting quietly, “The Gods of the Copy-Book Headings” are doing what they do best: Keeping score. Occasionally one of them will say “Stones are hard, water is wet”. Isn’t it a shame that each generation has to learn that anew? 

Anyway, my dear darling Debbie, in addition to giving Medusa a bad name and having the temperament of a coiled viper and the manners of a rutting wolverine, you are rapidly descending to dumb as a box of hammers status.

I saved the best known Socialist for last. He set the standard. He became the paradigmatic template for statists everywhere. If he comes back he is said to have vowed, “No more Mister Nice Guy”. One of his favorite Americans was Margaret Sanger, the beloved founder of Planned Parenthood. I present

ADOLPH HITLER

 Kevin Smith

PS – What color is an orange? How do you spell TV? Could you find your ass using both your hands? Take your time. Let’s do the easy ones first.

August 2, 2015

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Praise Jesus! The wily Hound of Heaven has caught another sinner and returned him to the land of milk, honey, and Amazing Grace as told by you in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel.

Big Stein,

Uber charged you $38 to get from your house to the airport. The cab was clean and the driver was courteous.

Non-Uber charged you $83 to get you form the airport to your house. Plus, the cab was hot and smelled like a family of coyotes had just moved out. I am going to go out on a limb here but if the driver was in front of you in a line at the post office you would go to Fed-Ex.

Since modern American Liberals consciously and constantly conflate correlation with causation allow me some leeway here. 

Taking a cab form the airport puts you in the embrace of the python-like grip of the modern American Liberal Broward County Board of Commissioners. It matters not one whit what the good or service is. For the good of the consumer they regulate it. The trade off to the cab czar is simple. He gets a monopoly.

Maybe one of the reasons Johnny still can’t read is because the Educational side of the Educational/Poverty Complex gets to control entry into the business. Better for them is the simple fact that they have the force of law on their side. The follows the kabuki dance of getting a rate increase. Before the cab cabal asks for a raise they contribute to the candidates running for the Commission. Then they contribute to their re-election campaigns. [At this point I announce that as a proud alumnus of Bayonne, NJ – that’s at the good end of Hudson County – the gift of being able to tell the buttered side form the dry is given to all infants when they leave the hospital] “Happy Days are Here Again” always sounds better when it is preceded by “Whose Wine I Drink Whose Song I Sing.

The combination of cash coming in over the transom coupled with the insatiable mAL desire to regulate is too much to resist.

How much dough has been given to the pols who set the rates and run interference for the cab gang? Include their lawyers, their lobbyists, their insurance agents and all the people who benefit from this monopoly.

At least now we know that the price of this absurdity, as blatant an example of a combination in restraint of trade as you will find here today, is $45. Prorated over Big Stein, Little Stein, and Boss Stein it’s not that bad. 

The cab still sinks but it’s the price we pay for consumer protection. Where the Hell is Ralph Nader when we really need him?

Meanwhile, it appears that you have “walked out of the cave and looked up and seen the stars’. Who knows what other truths await? Who knows what wonders await? I suggest you curl up with some Bastiat, another Bayonne guy, Hayek, Friedman, and de Soto. You may be on the road to Damascus. 

I await the results of your trip. 

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS -Imagine if the do-gooder statists had gotten their mitts on the internet before it exploded?

August 2, 2015

Deputy Mayor Robert Weinroth

201 West Palmetto Road

Boca Raton, FL 33432

RE: How about a 2 convict policy? Some comments on your “Send Jonathan Pollard to Israel” op-ed in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel.

Mr. Weinroth,

You’re right about Jonathan Pollard. 30 years in the pokey was his sentence. He did the crime and he did the time. It’s time to let him out. It is owed to the ledger to point out that a strong case could have been made 30 years ago for wiring him up and lighting him up a la the Rosenbergs.

I add that spying for a friend, in this case Israel, in no way mitigates his treasonous act. [If you are not familiar with “false flag” operations Frederick Forsrythe gives a classic example. Look it up] He did his time. Open the door and get his treasonous ass out of the country.

But wait; there’s more.

Long before the term “Islamic terrorist” fell afoul of modern American Liberals because of its inconvenient truth, “a troubled youth in a downward spiral” killed Senator Robert Kennedy. Sirhan Sirhan was tried and convicted of murder in 1969. He has been in prison ever since. No prisoner convicted of a similar crime at the same time is still in jail. It’s time to open the door and get his murdering ass out of this country. A case could have been made for his execution way back then but it wasn’t. [It must be noted that the execution of Ricky Ray Rector was used to elect Bill Clinton. If Sirhan went to the gas chamber people would have cheered.

How about putting them on the same plane? 

The bonus with Sirhan is that the feral Islamic terrorists would have no choice but to love us. A win, win, no? Besides, it would be the Christian thing to do.

Kevin Smith

August 2, 2015

Letter to the Editor

The Miami Herald

3511 NW 91^st Street

Miami, FL33172

RE: “Ground Zero for Climate Change” – Some comments on your editorial about how we have so little time before it all comes crashing down on us and, just as important, what to while waiting for the end.

Sirs, 

I was guest on several occasions at the old world HQ of the Miami Herald. That was when your crystal tower was right smack on Biscayne Bay. There were rumors, unconfirmed mind you that the editorial board handled dissent by trussing up the heretics and opening the back door to fling them into the bay. Just like the way the Romans handled the Carthaginians or Salem handled the witches. 

I mention that because your real estate transaction refutes the claim that modern American Liberals, usually mush brained ohmadahns, cannot be hard driving ruthless businessmen, people who would give the Koch Brothers a run for their money when it comes to commercial chicanery.

I say that because even though you were aware that Biscayne Bay, fed by an inexorable rising sea, would soon engulf your building you managed to find a head up its ass 1%er to buy your property.

For that alone you get an instant pass into the Scrooge Hall of Fame.

Don’t tell Bernie Sanders. He’ll boycott your paper.

I mention this because since Boss Fiedler ran the hive I’ve been telling the Herald to turn off its A/Cs.

Follow the bouncing ball. I’ll type slowly.

Coal is burned to produce electricity to power A/Cs. With the exception of coal mined by Tom Steyer coal is “dirty” and kills polar bears. If you turn off your A/Cs you will save the polar bear and help “cool the earth and calm the seas”. [Baby seals may object to the rejuvenated bear population but everybody has to chip in if we are to save the world, right? Besides, the bears don’t do what anything different than what Planned Parenthood does, right?

I suggest that you split the savings on your FPL bill with your employees.

Does ObamaCare cover air freshener  and deodorant implants?

Don’t you love it when a plan comes together?

Kevin Smith

August 2, 2015

Rosemary O’Hara – Editorial Page Editor

The Sun Sentinel

500 E. Broward Blvd

Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33394

RE: Judicial activism – Some comments on your puzzling editorial about why the casino big-wigs never have to fill an inside straight.

Ms. O’Hara, 

“Don’t Let Judge Decide Gambling’s Future” is an example of how to get lost on a ladder.

Two things:

#1 – Please tell me how, absent never ending White guilt over Wounded Knee, how Florida’s Redskins got control over the perpetually lactating machine that is gambling. I am more used to Chief Vito and Medicine Man Nunzio than I am to alligator wrestlers who are above the law. [Try serving a complaint on a reservation]

#2 – You don’t want Judges to “decide gambling’s future”. You were tumescently overjoyed when Judges decided to ignore the will of the people in the matter of same sex marriage. Also, the question of redistricting, having been decided however imperfectly by the legislature, was overturned by the Courts. That didn’t seem to bother you. By the by, what would be your reaction if a Judge were to rule that districts specifically drawn to guarantee the election of a Black candidate – Think Commissioner Bill Cosby or Assemblyman OJ Simpson – was unconstitutional?

Better yet, would you send me a list of things that the courts can settle and things that the courts can’t settle? It would make it easier for me to make up my mind.

Thank you.

Kevin Smith

July 28, 2015

Taren Ruggiero, R.N.

Department of Nursing

Holy Cross Hospital

4725 N. Federal Highway

Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33308

Ms. Ruggiero,

Just as much as modesty is an overrated virtue sloth is an underappreciated vice. There can be no excuse other than unconquerable concupiscence that can be used to explain the delay in writing this note to you.

I was a patient in Holy Cross Hospital from June 6, 2015 to June 11. 2015. My MR number was M0007850089 and my acct. number was Hooo214 968131. My attending physician was George G. Boctor, MD. My last trip to Holy Cross was my 6yh overnight stay.

I am not writing about the food because it was phenomenal. And yes, I mean it.

I wish to write of your nurses.

I was well attended to by a bevy of physicians who were graciously competent and professionally adept in the discharge of their duties

Your staff went far past the standards expected of health care providers in the front ranks. That may sound like a strained description but my daughter is an L&D RN in Texas and told me to be on my best behavior.

I was not a difficult patient but if I were my praise would have been higher and more effusive. I am a garrulous, engaging, oft-times curmudgeonly, calorically challenged, handsomely bearded raconteur.

Your people handled me superbly well. In fact, I asked 3 of them to marry me. I told #2 and #3 that my parents were Muslim/Mormon so there would be no problem with polygamy.

Other than ignoring my requests for cigars and cognac all I can say is that whatever you are doing keep doing it.

I mention no one in particular for fear of slighting someone by omission, an omission due to an unexpected senior moment.

Should I decide to build my own hospital I shall begin by hiring anyone who treated the most grateful patient in Room 357, bed 1.

Kevin Smith

July 29, 2015

Lyons, Stein, Mayo, and Steinbach – Troubadours all!

OK guys, I’m coming clean.

I’m a “bitter clinger”. I am also a “climate change denier”. Perhaps this came about because of the three years I spent in Wichita, Kansas, the sacred spot of the Koch Brothers. Wichita is close to Bentonville, Arkansas, where Sam Walton was mixing his noxious brew. Maybe that got to me.

Let me also confess that I fracked my first oil well in January, 1974.

As such, I was low hanging fruit for, as Big Stein calls them, “the clowns at FOX News”. [The thought of George Will and Charles Krauthammer with orange hair, a big red nose, baggy pants, and size 40 floppy shoes would make me reach for the PAY-TV button]

From time to time I have expressed my displeasure with the imbecilities that modern American Liberalism demands of its votaries. If it weren’t for tautologies, circular reasoning, and post hoc ergo propter hoc you guys wouldn’t be able to think at all. It does, however, make my life simpler. “The upturned neck awaits the ax.” On several occasions you have seen fit to publish my notes.

But now comes a perfect storm in a world where abortion is a sacrament and tax rates should begin at 105%.

Speaking of abortion…For years I have been writing that should Dr. Mengele, he of Auschwitz fame, present himself to the Democratic voters of Broward County in any primary he might pitch a shutout. [I’m from Hudson County, New Jersey. I know whereof I speak.]  Considering the recent release of the film noir home movies about Planned Parenthood and the deafening silence of modern American Liberals to this holocaust, I may have been too cautious in my voting outlook. I think perhaps that Hanna Arendt was right. In the end evil becomes banal. Also, Walker Percy, the noted American man of letters, was obviously right when he said that the back door of an abortion abattoir leads straight to Auschwitz, the aforementioned Dr. Mengele’s last place of gainful employment.

The “storm” is worthy of Mel Brooks, Swift, Oedipus and Lear, Professor Irwin Corey, and Joyce as the tour guide using the rules of the George Costanza School of Personal Conduct and Public Policy as the tie breaker.

New York magazine has a cover with 36 women on it who say they were drugged and raped by Bill Cosby.

Tom Brady recycles his cell phone and non-New Englanders want to bring back the Salem witch trials. [As an aside, how long has it been since Salem was bothered by witches?]

A double cover of the old Life magazine would be needed to fit all the ladies who got an up close and personal view of Bill Clinton’s one-eyed trouser snake. It was said that he would hump a snake if someone held its head.

While Brady is being fitted for a shroud there is not a peep, not a sigh about Hillary Clinton throwing her server into a wood chipper. Now the only ones who know what State Department secret stuff was on it is the Clinton Crime Family Foundation and several hundred Red Chinese CIA types who have had their lips shut by industrial strength Gorilla Glue lest they burst out laughing and gave the game away.

They are small things, neither of which is  larger than a man’s fist held up against the horizon. But they are things which, if put in a bag and the bag put in a closet, would not pass the smell test.

I don’t know why this is. Perhaps Lincoln’s 2^nd inaugural gives us a clue. I do know that the callous indifference to the sale of baby parts degrades our souls. If abortion, particularly for profit, is a morally neutral occurrence who cares about the Clintons? 

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – In addition to drilling and fracking I spent 10 years in the coal business. Since you constantly hector about climate change and rising sea levels may ask if you have banned all A/Cs in your HQ? Coal was once the prime fuel used to produce the electricity needed to cool your building. It is a bit ironic that natural gas is replacing coal as the utilities main source of fuel. Ironic in that fracking has caused the reserves of gas to explode in the last 5 years. Gaia is going to be really pissed off. 

Also, if the oceans are rising why do 1%ers trample each other to buy waterfront property? Further, why should the Federal government subsidize the flood insurance absent which financing is not available? That money could be better spent on Pell grants for inmates, Midnight Basketball, the still not here Summer of Recovery, or enforcement of the Iran nuclear treaty. Of course, Phoenix-like, solyndra will be rising from the ashes of liquidation should Hillary the Hecate have her way.

July 25, 2015

Randy Schultz

The Sun Sentinel

500 E. Broward Blvd.

Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33394

RE: The not yet here Summer of Recovery and why it ain’t coming – Some comments on your unlinkable op-ed in today’s Sun Sentinel

Mr. Schultz,

Modern American Liberals aren’t dumb per se. It just helps them get through the day. As the great Reagan used to say, “There’s just so much that they don’t know.” Worse, there is – forgive me, Pandora – a box filled with empirically generated data. It sits out there, bobbing in the punch bowl, like an unwelcome turd.

You speak of Clinton’s “four surpluses” as if there were, you know what I’m saying, “four surpluses”.

Government budgets have no capital expenditure items as opposed to expense items. 

An example would be my experience with the Broward Board of Education budget.

In 1998 I went to Board HQ to get some budget information. The charming “flack catcher” gave me a pie chart with expenditures expressed in percentages. When I asked her for a print out of the capital items and the expense items she looked at me as if weevils were eating my nose from the inside.

I explained, gently, ever so gently, that the big shiny metal box in the kitchen, AKA the refrigerator, is a capital item because its use life is more than 3 years. The containers of milk – fat free, of course –in the big shiny metal box are expense items.

If you don’t make the distinction you have an accountant’s version of chaos.

Writ large on a Federal level the moneys spent on an aircraft carrier are treated the same as moneys spent on Midnight Basketball. They aren’t. Thus we have naifish modern American Liberals talking of “surpluses” as if they were real. Like the unreachable horizon or the bush that gives 4 seasons of balloon juice or rainbow stew it exists only in the minds of people who believe that human nature can be changed if enough good people believe it can be changed.

If we had “surpluses” why was there no reduction in the total indebtedness of the United States? Not a dollar. Not a dime. Not a penny. Look it up.

There is no record in History, nowhere, no place, of any country taxing itself to prosperity. If you know of one please show me.

If raising taxes is the preferred modern American Liberal way to prosperity would not Logic dictate that raising interest rates would jump start the economy? A $30 an hour minimum wage would lead us to the land of milk and honey, no?

[Permit me to dash another long held mAL myth. Corporations don’t pay taxes. They never have and they never will. Alas but the card carrying members of the school of “I won’t tax thee if you don’t tax me. Let’s tax that fellow behind the tree” don’t know that the rules governing gravity can neither be suspended nor can they be repealed. Taxes are an expense item. They are the same as salaries, insurance premiums, pension payments, raw materials, donations to the rescue squad or Planned Parenthood, 3 martini lunches, and legal fees. 

They become part of the cost basis of whatever product or service the corporation produces. The customer pays them. Look that one up.]

You say, in a somewhat smarmy ex cathedra style, that “only 28% of the $4 trillion dollar economy is discretionary spending”. Au contraire. 

When the Tribune Corporation, the parent company of the Sun Sentinel, went into bankruptcy I guarantee you that 100% of the expenditures became “discretionary”. As such, they were subject to a black robed executioner’s ax.

I recommend that the broadsides fired by President Zeus once he gets to the top of Mount Washington include such tasty targets as the Department of commerce, the Department of Energy, and the Department of Education. Executive orders ending the subsidies to Amtrak and the Post Office will have been issued coincident to the inaugural. They would go into effect just after the words “I do” were heard.

Lord Keynes, a man more quoted than read, was a proponent of cutting taxes so as to release the “animal spirits” of business. It’s what makes the dog hunt.

Parnell was standing for election in his quite “rotten boro”. He came upon a group of men who were breaking rock. One of them was quite beside himself praising him as the greatest man in the world, as the savior of us all. “Calm yourself”, he said. “Next Monday I will be reelected and next Tuesday you will be breaking rock.

No man, not even a Pope, can change that. 

A system that enables the rock breaker to have other men break rocks for him is the only way to prosperity.

As the legendary Big Mike from Bayonne, the noted sportsman, inn keeper, and now an exemplary public servant still says, “That’s why you never see anybody swimming to Cuba”.

Kevin Smith

PS – Taxing yourself to prosperity is, as Churchill said, “like standing in a bucket and trying to pick yourself up by the handle”.

July 26, 2015

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Some comments on your trip to the old country as reported in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel

Big Stein, 

I hope you, Little Stein, and Boss Stein enjoyed your trip to Israel.

You don’t have to be a Jew to love Israel. 1/3^rd of the fragile, always in danger, 3 legged stool we call Western Civilization came from Jerusalem with the other 2 being from Athens and Rome.

As I like to say, “I’m not Jewish but the man who founded my church was”.

But on to the big old latke hiding next to the kasha.

Some time ago you wrote in a stiff-necked fashion, a column approaching the extreme manifestation of “non-malodorous fecal matter syndrome”. In it you said you were opposed to the death penalty under any circumstances.

“Israel hasn’t executed anyone since hanging 

Nazi monster Adolph Eichmann.
The Sun Sentinel

Today

You

[I’ll save the shelling of Alexandria and the pursuit of the Munich assassins for a later time. G-d Bless Golda Meir.

It’s emmis truth time.

Should Eichmann  have been executed”

Try yes or no.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – Tell me about the gun control laws and same sex marriage in Israel.

July 23, 2015

“TROUBLED YOUTH IN DOWNWARD SPIRAL”

All hail the New York Times!

It never lets you down.

Beginning in 1864 when the Times acquiesced in the Democratic Party calling Abraham Lincoln a “baboon” and then supported a negotiated peace with the South, a peace that would have let slavery stand, the Times has been a journalistic pustule attached to the body politic. It stinks and shines.

Their enthusiastic support of President T. Woodrow Wilson, who, if we are to believe Justice Thurgood Marshall, was the vilest, most bigoted publicly racist national office holder of the 20^th century. Wilson’s White House screening of “The Birth of a Nation” was covered by the Times in its news section, its political section, its arts section, and its social section.

The New York Times’s Moscow Correspondent Walter Duranty, the Pulitzer Prize winner in 1932, was a bought and paid for spy of the KGB. He wrote of how the low carb, gluten free diet that Uncle Joe Stalin had the Ukrainian Kulaks on was actually quite good for them. [A synonym for Kulak was Jew] He starved between 6,000,000 and 10,000,000 of them to death.

Watching very carefully was Adolph Hitler. Let it be stipulated that the Nazis were more precise record keeper than the Russkies..

It’s not too hard to connect those dots.

From 1933 to today the New York Times has refused to acknowledge the perfidy of its employee.  His Pulitzer star still shines proudly in its lobby. Imagine if the Pulitzer Prize winner for Foreign Reporting in 1934, Frederick T. Birchall, the Berlin correspondent of the Times, was working for the Gestapo? Just imagine. I can’t.

Herbert L. Matthews, Harrison Salisbury, and Anthony Lewis are three reasons why Google is so important.

Matthews got Castro his job. Salisbury thought the Viet Cong were “agrarian reformers”. Lewis said White folks criticizing Pol Pot’s killing of 1/3^rd of Cambodians was out of bounds because of “cultural arrogance”’. 

“non-malodorous fecal matter syndrome” is a trait shared by modern American Liberals everywhere. The Times, in a Mephistopholean bargain, is able to genetically implant it into their scribes.

I stopped reading the Times in March, 2003. I had/have very clear memories of my father, the legendary Judge Smith, reading the 2 Arthurs – Daley and Krock – to me on Sunday when Harry Truman was President.

[It is passing strange that Hillary the Hecate now says that even though she voted for “it” in October, 2002 she never thought the President would do “it”. Lurch Kerry, a man who successfully married up twice,  a man who could support himself by being a face model shill for a hatchet company, said with nary hint of sardonic wit, that he voted for “it” before he voted against “it”. Spare me Lord from prolific protestations of public people who proclaim profusely that plaid is their favorite color. It is no longer necessary to define “smarmy” as in “smarmy bastard”. Gender equity demanded that there be gender balance.]

For the 3 months, New Year’s Day to Saint Patrick’s Day, leading up to the war, the Times was more concerned with the pressing question of why chicks not only couldn’t tee them up at the Masters but were only allowed into the Augusta National club house either to make their magic meat loaf or iron the members’ shirts. In the almost 10 week run up to war the Times devoted more Page 1 space to whether or not ladies would hit from the whites than it did to this country going to war. 

That took cojones so grande that should publisher Pinch Sulzberger, AKA “Little Shit”, and with the possible exception of Senator Lard Kennedy, the best example of why the inheritance tax rate should begin at 105%,  sit down he could not stand up without the benefit of a fork lift., doubtless operated by El Frito Bandido, his Sugar Daddy.

Thus was the stage set for “TROUBLED YOUTH IN DOWNWARD SPIRAL”.

This particular “TROUBLED YOUTH IN [A] DOWNWARD SPIRAL” shot and killed 5 serving members of the United States Armed Forces.

2 weeks before a “TROUBLED YOUTH IN [A] DOWNWARD SPIRAL” murdered 5 Americans in Chattanooga another “TROUBLED YOUTH IN [A] DOWNWARD SPIRAL” murdered 9 Americans in Charleston. 

George Orwell, a repentant Bolshie who came to know the Baby Jesus, told us that “All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others”. Thus there was no surprise when Governor Mush Mouth O’Malley, a supremely spineless politician, spent 3 days apologizing for saying “All lives matter”.  His audience, all Black, booed him for saying that because the narrative, mostly set by the Times, says that Black deaths, particularly when caused by White folk, are more important than White deaths, particularly when they are caused by a possible feral Muslim thug. 

If it had been possible the Times would have led a night time raid snatching the White guy out of the lockup so they could flay him, disembowel him, and have him drawn and quartered because he is, presumptively, a red necked, gun loving White trash racist who wrapped himself in the Confederate flag.

What could be the most fitting comment?

 I know

FRIGGIN’  HYPOCRITES

KEVIN SMITH

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

PS – The last best use for the Times is one that helps the fragile environment. Keep a few Week in Review sections in the smallest room in the house. Hold it in front of you. Admire it. Crumple it. Then put it behind you. Cleanliness is next to Godliness, right?

                                                            

July 21, 2015

Mitchell Berger, Esq.

Berger, Singerman

350 E Las Olas Blvd

Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301

RE: Maybe the world won’t end before Thanksgiving

Mr. Berger,

“Have you heard? It’s in the stars. Next July we collide with Mars.” With apologies to Cole Porter but his lyrics have awakened a different Muse.

Perhaps it is just a coincidence but when Tom Steyer, a classmate of your wife in what was, I think, an inner city school that was gang run and drug infested, stopped selling dirty coal to emerging nations who didn’t give a rat’s ass about CO2 or ozone layers but who just wanted to feed their people, good things began to happen in the Arctic.

I’ll try to be gentle.

The polar ice cap, the icebergs, the glaciers, and the precious polar bears, the only counterbalance to being overrun by those terminally cute baby seals, is in the early stages of a monstrous, Alaska-sized, comeback.

University College in London – the London in England, not the one in Kentucky – a 200 year old highly regarded research center, and one presumptively virgo intacta from the siren calls of the filthy lucre proffered by the vile Koch Brothers, used 5 years of data, empirical data, data subject to 3^rd party analysis and scrutiny, data subject to independent replication, data gathered for 5 years from the Cryosat-2 radar satellite launched by and run by the European Space Agency.

It may be an inconvenient truth and I quickly add that the schadenfreude is tumescent but 2 things have now been proved that weren’t before.

#1 – The ice isn’t melting and, further

 #2 – It’s growing.

If I were a cad I would say something like “How do you like those apples, peckerhead”? I’m not so I won’t.

The sound you hear is like the one made by the competing drums at a Texas/OU football game. It is the sound made when the collective sphincters of all apostles of Ned Lud, Lysenko, Rachel Carson, Paul Ehrlich, VP Alpha Gump and all the phony bastards who have/had a hubris that the ancient Greeks could not imagine, one that says that man can “cool the earth and calm the seas” like the world’s largest ideological “lock box”.

I hope I am the first to tell you.

Kevin Smith

PS – I still haven’t read of your firm announcing that because the waters are rising that you will no longer handle any side of any real estate transaction on property that can be affected by tidal action. [The only exception would be if you have a client who has a buyer from Quebec} I suppose you are waiting for the Harvest Moon/high tide confluence so you can announce it from a kayak in your office. I am happy to hear that you have banned all coal powered A/Cs form your offices. You have, haven’t you?

PPS – Here’s a prediction I will bet the ranch on. Martin O’Malley, a candidate for the Democratic nomination for President has outdone Henry the 2^nd for apologies. He apologized, profusely and prolifically, for saying “All lives matter”. The only conclusion we can make from this is that the murder of 5 servicemen in Chattanooga, with all the victims being White, doesn’t count as much as the deaths of 9 churchgoers in Charleston because the victims there were all Black. I say he will not be in the next edition of “Profiles in Courage”. Anybody want to bet that he will?

July 19, 2015 

Michael Mayo

The Sun Sentinel

500 E. Broward Blvd. 

Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33394

RE: Stiff necked people with horns – It’s been a long time – Some comments on your column that exudes narcissism it the point of solipsism or why I can’t get enough of modern American Liberals.

Mr. Mayo

“…Then again, I was more than a little shocked

when I told a woman I was Jewish and she asked – 

in complete seriousness – if she could see my horns.”

The Sun Sentinel

Today

Page 1B

You

I am not Jewish but the Man who founded my Church was.

Forget about the 4 Source Theory of Pentateuch Composition. Forget about Arthur Koestler’s 13^th Tribe. Forget about cooking all the flavor out of a noble rib-eye. Forget about my pal Max Katz being the reason for American anti-Semitism. Forget about the public love that Golda Meir showered on Richard Nixon. Forget about the 6 pound, 6 day old latke that American Jews had to swallow when a curmudgeonly Christian told them that Jesse Helms was the best friend Israel had in the Senate. Forget about the simple Israeli policy of “Shoot first”. Pray tell but where in the name of Shylock do you hide your horns?

Big Stein is on vacation. Wonderful Stevie got the sack. Schultz is a promising modern American Liberal ca-ca shill but needs seasoning. Because I am “bound and determined not to be cliché-ridden” I need industrial strength, mush-brained purveyors of “rainbow stew” jackassery to rile my Muse. 

Praise G-d that you have entered the 10 ring this morning.

I won’t be able to trap the baby manatees until the tide turns this afternoon so I have time on my hands. Allah be praised that gravity defiers, scribes such as you, are never far from public view. 

Mayo is offended because some people like to wear Confederate stuff – hats, shirts, flags, inter alia. As you say…”Even Germany has had the decency and common sense to ban swastikas”.

Here’s a flash, Mikey.

This country hasn’t. At least not yet.

The Supreme Court has ruled that Nazi wanabees, replete with swastikas,  death head insignia, jack boots goose stepping to the tune of oom-pah bands, shouting Todt Juden, in  a neighborhood filled with Holocaust survivors are OK

Mark Twain was right. Wagner’s music isn’t as bad as it sounds. Is it OK for me to listen to some of it?

Are you saying that red necks can’t dress up like Nathan Bedford Forest and shout Dixie because you are offended?

I say this as someone with 2 uncles 4 generations removed who went line abreast into the Wheat Field on July 2, 1863. Both were members of the 69^th Regiment, the Irish Brigade. One of them is still there, “wrapped in his faded coat of Blue”.

Oliver Cromwell killed about 1/3^rd of the people of Galway in the 1650s, That is where my people, as Irishmen are wont to say, are from. 

Does that mean I should stop reading Shakespeare?

Preston Henn flies the Confederate flag because he can. Maybe if people stop coming to his store he’ll choose to change his mind. Maybe not. Aren’t modern American Liberals always lecturing the “great unwashed” about the need for freedom of choice?

If it offends you turn your eyes away.

Oy!

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

July 9, 2015

Daniel Henniger

The Wall Street Journal

1211 Avenue of the Americas

New York, NY 10036

RE: AAARGH! – “Hurricane Sandy” –  A comment or two on your Chris Christie column in today’s Wall Street Journal

Mr. Henniger,

Perhaps “God Holy Trousers” would have been a better way for an ex-Jersey guy – Bayonne, in particular, with sojourns in Sea Bright and Bayhead in the good old summertime – to express my displeasure at your error, your gross error, your turd in the punch bowl error, your error of Homeric size, sure to be included in the next edition of the Guinness Book in re the continuing Dracula- like never dying shibboleth named Hurricane Sandy.

The highest recorded wind speed in the storm was 58 MPH. As an alumnus of Hurrican Carol, Hurricane Dolly, the unnamed storm in 1962, the unnamed storm in 1984, Hurricane Katrina, and Hurricane Wilma I assure you that a 58 MPH is what experienced Fisher Island 24s drivers, a helmsman such as Frank Murphy of late and happy memory, live for.

I hold no brief for Governor Christie but as a calorically challenged Garden Stater – Has anyone looked into the possibilities of the Governor and Hillary competing in the next Dancing with the Stars chapter? The proceeds would go for gastric by-passes for those poor unfortunates who are wider than they are taller who find themselves “unlucky in life’s lottery” but are unable to slip into the ObamaCare tent. These are the Road Warriors who are no longer able to dine at the nearby dumpster because if they get in they can’t get out. How they stay huge is one of life’s mysteries. – who lived for 26 years in West Orange, NJ, a town contiguous to Livingston, Christie’s hometown. I am sure we spent some pleasant times in Seymour’s Luncheonette, Eppes Essen, the Ritz Diner, Livingston Bagel, and the Chinese Restaurant on the Route 10 circle.

Before I wander too far into the word fen patrolled by poltroons and mountebanks such as Noam Chomsky let me advise you to watch your language or risk a luncheon menu limited to a knuckle sandwich…on wry.

Kevin Smith

July 18, 2015 

Randy Schultz

The sun Sentinel

500 E. Broward Blvd.

Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33394

RE: Some observations and comments on your unlinkable Op-Ed in today’s Sun Sentinel on vox populi and the rat bastard Republican legislators who refuse to abide by the wishes and commands of the people.

Mr. Schultz,  

 

Your unctuously oleaginous column about bad old White Republican legislators in Tallahassee who thwart the will of progressive people who want to make a system “so perfect that no one will have to be good” is, alas, a typically flawed modern American Liberal construct.

The dirty little secret, the turd in the political punch bowl that everyone knows Is there like Shamu the Seaquarium whale waiting for the dinner bell to sound so he can leap out of the water, is that all the players walked into the cigar smoke filled – I hope – back room to “create” safe seats for Blacks to occupy. The price that the non-urban legislators got for their compliance was the complementary “creation” of - can you believe it – safe Republican seats.

How else could Alcee Hastings, a famous Florida felon, a lout who had his Black-robed ass impeached and flung off the Federal bench for cause, could have been elected to the House of Representatives?

There are at least 3 districts that would send O.J. Simpson. Step-n-Fetchit, Mike Tyson, or Bill Cosby to Congress.

Isn’t that the way that a Democracy is supposed to work? Do some homework and see what Madison said in Federalist 10.

Bayonne, NJ, my hometown in the good end of Hudson County, solved the racial imbalance by cutting the Black section in half lengthwise and then bulldozed parts of both sections into urban renewal zones with greatly reduced population densities.

The only 2 places more Democratic than Hudson County would be a wine and cheese party at Barbra Streisand’s 1% digs or Zabar’s every Sunday at noon in good weather.

You say that the “Florida legislature has ignored direct orders from the public” in the matter of “fair” voting districts.

Does the same Logic apply to the overwhelming command of the people of Florida in the issue of same sex marriages? If memory serves 62% of the electorate voted it down.

OOPS. Silly me!

Being a modern American Liberal means that you never have to say you’re sorry for “eclectic indignation” and “my favorite color is plaid” school of public policy.

“Open and transparent” redistricting?

No wonder you are in favor of abortion. If you believe such clap-trap you would always be pregnant.

Kevin Smith

July 8, 2015

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel

RE: Fill me in, please

Big Stein,

“When I was sick and lay abed” a lot of things happened.

Since Professor Steven Goldstein has either been captured by Ethiopian pirates or did not share my good fortune in dealing with the ObamaCare Death Panels, the mantle of canary in the coal mine, card carrying, fire breathing face of modern American Liberalism has fallen on you. It is not known if an environmental impact statement was filed but that’s OK. MALs don’t have much use for the law.

Since you conflate correlation with causation – It sure as Hell beats thinking doesn’t it? – and since Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc is, along with 4^th and 5^th  trimester abortions and maybe Bernie Sanders is out where the regular buses don’t run but it will make Hillary come to like Castro and Chavez so it must be good I turn to you for some answers.

These questions are asked in the spirit of comity and good will. Honest.

#1 – What happened in Iraq? Didn’t the President tell us in 2012 that we were leaving it a “secure country on the road to democracy”?

` #2 – Is ISIS still the JV squad or have they made it to the varsity?

#3 - When will the Summer of Recovery get here? Before Winter? Ever?

#4 – A melanin challenged loon killed 9 Black people in Charleston. He likes the Confederate flag. Naturally the mush brained media said that the flag made him do it. [Correlation and causation, remember?] There were 83 separate shooting incidents in Chicago this weekend with14 deaths. I am going to go out on a limb here but there were no White victims nor were there White shooters. Did the Confederate flag cause this? If so, how?

#5 – An undocumented Mexican illegal alien, 5 times deported and 4 times returning, shot a non-Black woman to death in San Francisco. Any flag involvement there? Was he basking in Alamo pride? Doesn’t this prove that Trump was right and probably should be President?

#6 – If 2 Muslim twin brothers want to get married in a mosque will the Imam have to or go to jail?

#7 – If a Lubavitcher shul refuses to rent me space in their parking lot to sell my pulled pork sandwiches on Shabos – The lot should be empty, right? – can a Judge force them?

#8 – Emmis truth time – Wouldn’t you really, I mean really, really like to see Hillary Clinton and Chris Christie do a few turns of Swan Lake or, at least, a Fred and Ginger look-back? I would. The two of them have enough wasted waist suet to keep the fires in Haiti burning for a week.

#9 – How is that “calm the oceans, cool the earth” bullshit coming along? It’s more than 6 years, amigo.

I am looking forward to getting the official party line.

I am 2 weeks late but won’t you join me in toasting the executions of the Rosenbergs? Don’t you think there should be a 24 hour armed guard – bayonets pointing in – at their graves lest those scroyles sneak out one dark and stormy night and do yet more harm to the Republic?

      

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET

#10 – Was Alger Hiss guilty or was he railroaded by Nixon?

#11 – Why were the Kennedy tax cuts good but the Bush tax cuts bad?

#12 – Speaking of tax cuts, how do you give a tax cut to someone with no income?

#13 – The Duke Lacrosse team really did it, didn’t they?

#14 – Walmart became evil after Hillary Clinton resigned from the Board, right?

#15 - The thought of Dukakis as President made the USSR tear down the Wall, right?

#16 - Eliminate bus and train fares to save the planet.

#17 – Was Greece the victim of predatory lenders?

#18 – Guilt free crème brulee.

#19 – Scoreless ties in all games, except women’s soccer. 

#20– Yes we can reach the horizon…Maybe at the end of Chelsea’s 2^nd term.

On the other hand…

“Of all the things that men endure how few

Laws or kings can cause or cure.”

July 5, 2015

Gary Stein

The Sun Sentinel 

RE: Fiat lux – Some comments on your column in today’s Sun Sentinel

Big Stein,

It took all my skill and cunning, traits whetted and honed after decades of listening to the vipers slithering in  the covens of modern American Liberalism as they offend Logic, decimate critical thinking and reasoned discourse, poltroonish trolls all, who know that raising both taxes and the minimum wage is the time tested way to make the rich  poorer so the poor can be made richer – Way to go, Bernie! – to avoid the nefarious ObamaCare Death Panels this past month.

Having done so I feel fit to re-enter the arena in the never ending culture wars secure in the knowledge that in my absence B. Hussein Obama is still the best President we have, that Hillary Clinton, she of the exponentially expanding steatyagenous midsection – Is it true she uses WD40 to get into her pastel colored, reporter avoiding mumu? Oliver Hardy, Jackie Gleason, and Alfred Hitchcock, not Sir Edmund Hillary, were her childhood idols, no – is fully flummoxed by a functioning fax machine, and that Justice Clarence Thomas is, according to George Takei, nee Sulu of Star Trek, a “black faced buffoon”. 

Some things never change.

Yet there is one thing I must thank you for.

In your column in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel you solved, of course unwittingly, a problem of semantics.

As Broward County’s leading scrivener of ideological biliousness, AKA the interchangeable ukases and fiats of modern American Liberalism and its butt-boy butt- girl, the Democratic Party, you say that anyone opposed to abortion is “pro-life”.

If opposition to abortion makes one “pro-life” would not Logic dictate that “pro-death” must apply to all those in favor of abortion? [You may want to have Little Stein, your college student son, see if he can get his hands on a dog-eared copy of the Trivium, particularly the part covering Logic, for you.]

Sometimes a blind squirrel can find an acorn.

If you are opposed to abortion Big Stein, the man behind the curtain, proclaims that you are “pro-life”.

If you are in favor of Doctor Mengele, and you must know that he would win any Democratic primary he ran in in Broward County because of his progressive views on women’s reproductive rights, you are, according to Big Stein, “pro-death”.

Thanks for clearing that up. 

Bumper stickers coming soon.

Kevin Smith

WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET