August 24, 2014
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Blvd.
Ft. Lauderdale, FL. 33301

RE: Some impressions of “Risky Business” past the pretty pictures

Mr. Berger,

My devotion to James Joyce and how he changed the English language by yanking it by its “embarrassing short and curlies” and making it march in a new direction made me pause when I came across “addification” as in “ocean addification”. It was like watching “a new planet swim into my ken”.

My electronic search defined it – not by etymology but by example – by saying how more catsup enhanced the hamburger experience. I knew exactly what it meant when the second example was of how a tight sweater increased a lady’s zoftigness.

I think it would be fair to say that “ocean addification” is the same as a large balloon filled with pancake batter. When you push one side of it the contents shift to another side. No more, no less. Just rearranged, right?

In the same paragraph I saw “climate change” and “global warming” used as synonyms. My devotion to the great Dr. Johnson – Samuel, not Lyndon – caused me to create a new word: GlobalCoolingGlobalWarmingClimateChangeClimateDestruction. I don’t know whether you know it or not but a lot of strange things happen every year in September about 1,000 miles North of here. The leaves change color; temperatures drop; the wind picks up; apple cider appears; kids put on costumes for Halloween; year after year after year after year.

Wazupwidat?

One of the action photos in your tract shows a woman in Galveston, TX being rescued from roiling waters caused by a hurricane. For the record is that the nameless hurricane of 1908, the one that got to Texas without any help from a rapacious, planet destroying, fossil fuel consuming despoiling selfish, mostly White, wanabee 1%ers, or was it from a later properly named one?

Incidentally, the action shot of the New York Stock Exchange “under water after Hurricane Sandy” has 2 errors, neither of which is larger than a man’s fist on the horizon. Hurricane Sandy was not a hurricane. It was not even close. The highest recorded wind was 57 MPH.

It may be de minimis but I am sure your firm has billed countless clients myriad hours parsing the difference between “may” and “will”, right?



Law rightfully uses curves and soft edges to make or prove a hard point. In science, any science, there can be no small errors. “Rounding errors” do not exist in the laboratory.

[One of my ideas to increase FCAT scores while increasing the self-esteem of inner city youth, many of whom live in single parent homes, usually run by women of color who are exploited by the low prices of Walmart and made more unemployable when modern American Liberals help her by raising the minimum wage, was to change
Pi from 3.1416 to 3.0. Geometry scores would soar. That buildings and bridges would fall down is of no great import. It would be reason for a never ending “shovel ready “ jobs program in a perpetual “Summer of Recovery”.

In another action photo you show a Black man wading in the street in Immokalee “after Hurricane Wilma”.

Have you ever been to Immokalee? How about Belle Glades? They are both less than an hour from the Breakers in Palm Beach and from Worth Street shoppes. [The Breakers and Worth Street are on par with the Dorchester and Jermyn Street, both in London]

I am positive that in the 50 years since Lyndon Johnson declared war on gravity no Hoplite-led phalanx of the brigades of the War on Poverty has ever been there. If they were and they used the typical weapon of money somebody should be arrested.

Hey! Rome had 3 Punic Wars. It took the British from 1775 to 1815 to settle the tab with the French. The Serbs and the Croats have been scrapping for 800 years. Ditto the Sunni and the Shias only with them it’s 14 centuries. The Greeks and the Turks have been avoiding conflict resolution seminars for 30 centuries. [To put that last number in perspective Ptolemy came and went as the unquestioned top dog in the “settled science” of astronomy] Modern American Liberals are right. Just because it didn’t work the first time doesn’t mean it won’t the second or the third or the fourth or the sixteenth or whatever. You go, Sisyphus!

It may be time for that mythical Washington Post headline

World Ending
Women and Minorities will suffer disproportionately


That’s enough for now. I’ll be back. You give me a target rich environment with no daily limits.



Kevin Smith

PS – Your 51 page multi-colored neo-Jeremiad tract is absolute irrefutable proof of one adage. 4 members of your team – Bloomberg, Paulson, Rubin, Steyer - share one common trait. That they are incalculably wealth is beyond doubt. Croesus would cringe in shame. There are not enough zeros and commas to accommodate their collective net worth. The empirically self-evident adage, the one my sainted mother told me, years ago, is

A fool and his money are soon parted.

PS2 – Everyone has the right to throw money off the back of a moving train. At least these 4 swells are tossing their own. Traditional modern American Liberals don’t care whose money gets the heave. That’s why in 2009 they thanked God and/or Allah for the existence of mendacious Mandarin money lenders.

PS3 – I read where your wife went to high school with Tom Steyer. Do you think she could find out if he ever filed any Subchapter ‘S’ tax returns? John Edwards, remember him, did it all the time. That way he ducked the Medicare tax. See if she can find out.

PS4 – What is the Rhodium Group? I see where they supplied you with all your data. I counted pictures of 17 doubtless multi-talented, multi-degreed individuals who make up the visible part of the Rhodium Group. What’s their payroll? Who funds them? Are they a for profit company? I ask this because any time a tree hugging brown shirted Cossack reads a report on the environment that does not condemn energy companies their funding is always thought to be tainted. Are tax returns and certified financial statements available? If not, why not. [In Rhetoric that is known as denying the major premise] Get back to me, OK?

PS5 – I’m going to tell you a secret that rational people use to discover secret boobs of the sky is falling school. Anytime anyone anywhere begins to say that correlation is the same as causation it is a sure sign that the dumb bastard couldn’t find his ass using both of his hands. Honest.

PS6 – Who caused the California earthquake? GW deniers or the Tea Party? Stay tuned.

PS6 – I must tell you that when I was typing this I donned my ball cap emblazoned with



PROUD GLOBAL WARMER