Posts
December 14, 2014
Chairman Mitch Caesar, Esq.
Broward County Democratic Party
1852 N. University Drive
Plantation, FL 33322
RE: Yes, Virginia. There is a Santa Claus and I want to thank him for an early Christmas gift. Your list is in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel.
Ave Chairman Caesar,
Next to certifying to the Guinness Book of Records how many knives have been stuck in the back of Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz [D-FL] and finding out whether it was an uncle or a cousin of Senator Lieawatha Warren [D-MA] who shot Custer, tore out his still beating heart, and ate it while shouting – between bites – Sic Semper White Man, the next best thing is reading what a modern American Liberal ohmadahn, with you being the paradigmatic template, writes.
“There is almost universal agreement
that the planet is getting warmer.”
I have to step back and control my breathing lest I over swing, such being the temptation of medium speed, letter high practice pitches to me, a ruthlessly literate curmudgeon.
First, “almost universal” is offensive to Logic and anathema to etymology. “Almost universal” is like “almost pregnant” or “really unique”. Those words cannot, repeat, cannot be qualified. “Almost a first down” does not give you 4 more downs. Lawyers must be held to a higher standard what with the litmus tests that contracts must undergo. Contracts have words with sharp edges and right angles as does everything subject to the scientific method. [SASE] Parabolic curves are for novels. And late night promises.
Look it up.
Second, the last time there was scientific “universal agreement” was when Ptolemy ruled the astronomical roost. His hegemony lasted for 15 centuries until someone looked in a telescope and said “It moves”.
Check with the most recent demands from the Somali pirates or with the Witness Protection Program to see if they know about his whereabouts. If there were ginormously gigantically carbon foot printing rockets back when he was defrocked he would have had his ass welded to the 3rd stage of an uberMacho Agena express rocket – one way – headed to Calisto.
Third, thank you for telling me that Florida is a peninsula and, as such, is “surrounded on three sides by water”. Next week you can conduct a tutorial on “isthmuses”. Then we can get to “estuaries” and why there is no difference between the Florida Everglades and the swamps in my beloved New Jersey.
This will lead to a discussion on “gravity”, it being the bête noire of modern American Liberals because they cannot legislate it, regulate it, or, so far at least, adjudicate it to bend the curve towards “fairness”, at least as it pertains to those “unlucky in life’s lottery”.
Fourth, I am Dallas-bound to see my Texas ladies. Thank you for telling me that I “must be vigilant in planning for the future of my children and grandchildren”. Your lips to God’s ears. Because of your insight I am planning a few more stocking stuffers. Modern American Liberal Bullshit Detector and Repellant is quite good at close quarters. It has the serendipitous benefit of depleting the ozone layer. Speaking of that, I remember former Vice President Alpha Gump telling us 25 years ago that we had 5 years to live before we were fried to death by a cruel sun untampered by ozone because of man’s desire for deodorant and air conditioning.
The last I heard Brother Gump was trying to play Hide the Salami with a masseuse. Have you heard differently?
My grandfather always marveled at the empirically self-evident fact that there were more horses’ asses than there were horses’ heads. Thanks to your predictably head up your ass bloviations the phenomenon continues.
Five – Save for an unshakeable belief in and support of abortion I know of no card carrying modern American Liberal who favors capital punishment. Allow me to introduce you to Professor Gruber. Is he a game changer? One good thing to come from him is that words will no longer be required to define “non-malodorous fecal matter syndrome”, His picture, indeed just his name, will do.
Six – Isn’t it time to get a bigger bus? The only person President B.O. hasn’t thrown under it has been his mother-in-law>hey, somebody has to keep his brats in line. He is always working on his golf game and his wife is trying to perfect her okra, endive, arugula, and tofu fat-free pop tarts.
Seven – My contempt for you is not personal. Strictly business.
Kevin Smith
Monday, December 15, 2014
Sunday, December 14, 2014
December 14, 2014
Gary Stein
The Sun Sentinel
RE: Modern American Liberals and why they never let you down – some comments on your selective amnesia in re the Vietnam War in today’s unlikable Sun-Sentinel.
Big Stein,
If I were to mention that Lyndon Johnson said he would “never send American boys to fight in foreign wars”, just like Wilson and Roosevelt promised, it would be wretched excess, just like the clap. I won’t mention his other war, the hugely successful, often imitated, and never duplicated one against poverty as it could be compared to piling on.
On the other hand, in addition to finding the other glove, we have you writing
“I like to think the protests helped us get out of
Vietnam and maybe saved some lives.”
Alas, facts intrude. Clio, my Muse, tells me that in May, 1972 Nixon, AKA The Peacemaker”, mined Haiphong harbor. That got the attention of the thuggish Gomers in Hanoi. In 4 months, after doing a pavan in Paris over the size and shape of the table, a cease-fire was agreed to. Nixon won 49 states in November. Less than a month later the North Vietnamese tried to live up to their ideals by violating the agreement causing Nixon to unleash the B-52s over Hanoi. After the bad guys ran out of SAM missiles they suddenly found the Baby Jesus. Our phase of the war was over a month later.
Look it up.
Another conveniently forgotten fact, a big old turd in the modern American Liberal punch bowl of inconvenient truths, is that student protest against the war ended when Nixon stopped the draft. Here one day hoping for a high number; gone the next when the lottery stopped.
Look it up.
Allow me to extend sincere non-denominational Season’s Greetings or Happy Holidays as Gaia instructs you.
I am still waiting for Little Stein, your college kid, to tell me if Wordsworth is still on the chick-lit shit list.
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
Gary Stein
The Sun Sentinel
RE: Modern American Liberals and why they never let you down – some comments on your selective amnesia in re the Vietnam War in today’s unlikable Sun-Sentinel.
Big Stein,
If I were to mention that Lyndon Johnson said he would “never send American boys to fight in foreign wars”, just like Wilson and Roosevelt promised, it would be wretched excess, just like the clap. I won’t mention his other war, the hugely successful, often imitated, and never duplicated one against poverty as it could be compared to piling on.
On the other hand, in addition to finding the other glove, we have you writing
“I like to think the protests helped us get out of
Vietnam and maybe saved some lives.”
Alas, facts intrude. Clio, my Muse, tells me that in May, 1972 Nixon, AKA The Peacemaker”, mined Haiphong harbor. That got the attention of the thuggish Gomers in Hanoi. In 4 months, after doing a pavan in Paris over the size and shape of the table, a cease-fire was agreed to. Nixon won 49 states in November. Less than a month later the North Vietnamese tried to live up to their ideals by violating the agreement causing Nixon to unleash the B-52s over Hanoi. After the bad guys ran out of SAM missiles they suddenly found the Baby Jesus. Our phase of the war was over a month later.
Look it up.
Another conveniently forgotten fact, a big old turd in the modern American Liberal punch bowl of inconvenient truths, is that student protest against the war ended when Nixon stopped the draft. Here one day hoping for a high number; gone the next when the lottery stopped.
Look it up.
Allow me to extend sincere non-denominational Season’s Greetings or Happy Holidays as Gaia instructs you.
I am still waiting for Little Stein, your college kid, to tell me if Wordsworth is still on the chick-lit shit list.
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
Friday, December 12, 2014
December 11, 2014
Chris Cilliza
The Washington Post
1150 15th St. NW
Washington, DC 20071
RE: Knotted DC knickers – Some comments on your take on the public reaction to what 2 teenagers did when their father pardoned a turkey.
Mr. Cilliza,
Every father of every teenage daughter knows the “look”. Whether she lives in the White House and her father has access to nuclear weapons or she lives in Bug Fug, Kentucky and her father is an out of work coal miner because an unexperienced layabout boob in DC wants to save polar bears the “look” is the same.
Trust me. Having your father pardon a turkey only makes it worse.
I recall with warm memories sweeping over me like a swarm of tumescent fire ants the trips to the mall for “a” dress, for “the” dress, for “any” dress. The best part came at the cash register.
The only way it could be worse would have been if Dad said that you had to go to one of the really fine public schools in DC.
You say, with neither nary a hint of irony nor a tinge of sarcasm, that “one of the few adhered-to-commandments of political Washington” is “Thou shalt not talk about politicians’’ children”.
With the age restraints in mind I guess that made it OK to say that Sarah Palin should be sodomized by crack heads as penance for her errant ways.
Why didn’t the rule and the outrage, the protective outrage, apply to Sarah Palin’s pre-pubescent daughter when it was suggested by big time media players that she be “entertained” by uber-macho professional athletes?
Eclectic indignation, as in the above described incidents, is no longer sufficient to describe the actions of modern American Liberals when it comes to subjective comments. High dudgeon for the children of media favorites and disdain for the children of “bitter clingers” is the rule.
The facts would suggest that “hypocritical bastard” would be the best term for you. “Lower than a heaping helping of eel shit” was a close second.
Congratulations to this week’s “Turd in the Punchbowl” winner.
Kevin Smith
PS – Speaking of outrage, it costs $2,000 a week, every week, for the Obama girls to go to school. Does anyone want to bet that the lunch menu does not have tofu fingers and kale sorbet on it?
Chris Cilliza
The Washington Post
1150 15th St. NW
Washington, DC 20071
RE: Knotted DC knickers – Some comments on your take on the public reaction to what 2 teenagers did when their father pardoned a turkey.
Mr. Cilliza,
Every father of every teenage daughter knows the “look”. Whether she lives in the White House and her father has access to nuclear weapons or she lives in Bug Fug, Kentucky and her father is an out of work coal miner because an unexperienced layabout boob in DC wants to save polar bears the “look” is the same.
Trust me. Having your father pardon a turkey only makes it worse.
I recall with warm memories sweeping over me like a swarm of tumescent fire ants the trips to the mall for “a” dress, for “the” dress, for “any” dress. The best part came at the cash register.
The only way it could be worse would have been if Dad said that you had to go to one of the really fine public schools in DC.
You say, with neither nary a hint of irony nor a tinge of sarcasm, that “one of the few adhered-to-commandments of political Washington” is “Thou shalt not talk about politicians’’ children”.
With the age restraints in mind I guess that made it OK to say that Sarah Palin should be sodomized by crack heads as penance for her errant ways.
Why didn’t the rule and the outrage, the protective outrage, apply to Sarah Palin’s pre-pubescent daughter when it was suggested by big time media players that she be “entertained” by uber-macho professional athletes?
Eclectic indignation, as in the above described incidents, is no longer sufficient to describe the actions of modern American Liberals when it comes to subjective comments. High dudgeon for the children of media favorites and disdain for the children of “bitter clingers” is the rule.
The facts would suggest that “hypocritical bastard” would be the best term for you. “Lower than a heaping helping of eel shit” was a close second.
Congratulations to this week’s “Turd in the Punchbowl” winner.
Kevin Smith
PS – Speaking of outrage, it costs $2,000 a week, every week, for the Obama girls to go to school. Does anyone want to bet that the lunch menu does not have tofu fingers and kale sorbet on it?
Tuesday, December 9, 2014
December 7, 2014
Glenn Garvin
The Miami Herald
RE: Lincoln, the Constitution, and why it is not a “suicide pact”. – Some comments on your column of 12/2/14.
Mr. Garvin,
Lincoln possessed a tunnel vison when it came to the Union. He wanted to keep it united. Anything that furthered that cause was good; anything that hindered it was bad. In addition to suspending the writ of habeas corpus he ran a Congressman out of the country. It took him 3 years to find the right generals. When he found them he made sure they had enough ammunition to do the job. Freeing the slaves where he couldn’t and keeping them in slavery where he could have freed them was a political move that was used to win the war. It worked.
Churchill said that if Hitler were to invade Hell he would at least make a favorable reference to the Devil in the House of Commons.
Madison’s Constitution tells us what government can do. Mason’s Bill of Rights tells us what government cannot do. We ignore it at our own peril.
Further, since your column of 12/2/14 another American hostage has been killed.
Hot, humid days in Philadelphia in the summer of 1787 gave, gives, us instructions for both emergencies.
Article 1, Section 9, Clause 2 gives the government the right to suspend the writ of habeas corpus “in cases of rebellion or invasion”. Article 1, Section 8, Clause 11 gives the government the right to issue letters of marque and reprisal. They are open ended hunting licenses to settle debts of national honor.
Using Osama bin Laden’s “strong horse, weak horse analogy” perhaps a period of smart phone photos of feral WOG terrorists having their eyes shoot out and then having bacon stuffed into them before being wrapped in pig skin to rot in the town square where the dogs and crows devour them will bring the other merry pranksters to their senses. If it doesn’t at least it will put paid on the bill of a dead American.
King George the Third said that if George Washington were to go back to private life after fighting the British Empire to a stand-off and serving as President for 2 terms he would be “the greatest man in the world”. He did and he was.
British, French, and German observers of Sherman’s army, particularly from late summer of 1864 to early spring of 1865, said that it would have marched through Europe in 6 weeks. After their jubilee in Washington the army disbanded. They went back to Ohio and Indiana and got on with their lives. Their sons and grandsons took up arms and were as ferocious as were their forebears. They did not. It is part of the American character.
2 Presidents – Lincoln in 1864 and Roosevelt in 1942 – broke into the supposedly sanctum sanctorum of American government, the Census Bureau, to gather information vital to the war effort; Lincoln to give Sherman the locations of the best farms on the road from Atlanta to Savannah and Roosevelt to give Earl Warren the street addresses of Japanese-Americans thus making it easier to round them up. [About 40,000 German-Americans and Italian-Americans were also interned. I find no evidence of reparations for them]
There was a time when the story of Cincannatus was told and lived in this land.
Now we have poltroons in and around the White House who say, “Stroke of the pen. Law of the land. Cool.” The sophist, Paul Begala, who said that, teaches at Georgetown Law. Prior to that he acquiesced in the death of Ricky Ray Rector, a Black man with the IQ of an egg plant. His death enabled Governor Clinton to show he was “tough on crime”. They are “men without chests”.
“And when you cut down every law to get at the Devil
Where would you hide, the laws being flat,
When he turned on you?”
“I tremble for our country when I remember that our Lord is just:.
Thank you for reminding us of that,
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
PS – If I were to say that there was a nip in the air today would the Word Police visit me? The aide who criticized the Obama girls just had her ass welded to the next Pioneer rocket going to Neptune. Will the same rules apply retroactively to the rotters who suggested rape for Sarah Palin and her 12 year old daughter?
Glenn Garvin
The Miami Herald
RE: Lincoln, the Constitution, and why it is not a “suicide pact”. – Some comments on your column of 12/2/14.
Mr. Garvin,
Lincoln possessed a tunnel vison when it came to the Union. He wanted to keep it united. Anything that furthered that cause was good; anything that hindered it was bad. In addition to suspending the writ of habeas corpus he ran a Congressman out of the country. It took him 3 years to find the right generals. When he found them he made sure they had enough ammunition to do the job. Freeing the slaves where he couldn’t and keeping them in slavery where he could have freed them was a political move that was used to win the war. It worked.
Churchill said that if Hitler were to invade Hell he would at least make a favorable reference to the Devil in the House of Commons.
Madison’s Constitution tells us what government can do. Mason’s Bill of Rights tells us what government cannot do. We ignore it at our own peril.
Further, since your column of 12/2/14 another American hostage has been killed.
Hot, humid days in Philadelphia in the summer of 1787 gave, gives, us instructions for both emergencies.
Article 1, Section 9, Clause 2 gives the government the right to suspend the writ of habeas corpus “in cases of rebellion or invasion”. Article 1, Section 8, Clause 11 gives the government the right to issue letters of marque and reprisal. They are open ended hunting licenses to settle debts of national honor.
Using Osama bin Laden’s “strong horse, weak horse analogy” perhaps a period of smart phone photos of feral WOG terrorists having their eyes shoot out and then having bacon stuffed into them before being wrapped in pig skin to rot in the town square where the dogs and crows devour them will bring the other merry pranksters to their senses. If it doesn’t at least it will put paid on the bill of a dead American.
King George the Third said that if George Washington were to go back to private life after fighting the British Empire to a stand-off and serving as President for 2 terms he would be “the greatest man in the world”. He did and he was.
British, French, and German observers of Sherman’s army, particularly from late summer of 1864 to early spring of 1865, said that it would have marched through Europe in 6 weeks. After their jubilee in Washington the army disbanded. They went back to Ohio and Indiana and got on with their lives. Their sons and grandsons took up arms and were as ferocious as were their forebears. They did not. It is part of the American character.
2 Presidents – Lincoln in 1864 and Roosevelt in 1942 – broke into the supposedly sanctum sanctorum of American government, the Census Bureau, to gather information vital to the war effort; Lincoln to give Sherman the locations of the best farms on the road from Atlanta to Savannah and Roosevelt to give Earl Warren the street addresses of Japanese-Americans thus making it easier to round them up. [About 40,000 German-Americans and Italian-Americans were also interned. I find no evidence of reparations for them]
There was a time when the story of Cincannatus was told and lived in this land.
Now we have poltroons in and around the White House who say, “Stroke of the pen. Law of the land. Cool.” The sophist, Paul Begala, who said that, teaches at Georgetown Law. Prior to that he acquiesced in the death of Ricky Ray Rector, a Black man with the IQ of an egg plant. His death enabled Governor Clinton to show he was “tough on crime”. They are “men without chests”.
“And when you cut down every law to get at the Devil
Where would you hide, the laws being flat,
When he turned on you?”
“I tremble for our country when I remember that our Lord is just:.
Thank you for reminding us of that,
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
PS – If I were to say that there was a nip in the air today would the Word Police visit me? The aide who criticized the Obama girls just had her ass welded to the next Pioneer rocket going to Neptune. Will the same rules apply retroactively to the rotters who suggested rape for Sarah Palin and her 12 year old daughter?
Sunday, December 7, 2014
December 6, 2014
K. Rupert Murdoch – Publisher
The Wall Street Journal
1211 Avenue of the Americas
New York, New York 10036
RE: “Time to say goodbye”
Mr. Murdoch,
Blame one of the most distinguished of your alumni for this “Dear John” letter.
It was Jude Wanniski who introduced me to what, after he said it, was a most self evident dictum
“Prices are struck on the margin.”
Today, pre-dawn, I drove past my usual news stand/coffee shop to buy the Wall Street Journal. For an unknown reason the paper has not been delivered to my usual stop for almost a year.
I drove the first half of a 5 mile round trip to get the paper. I gave the clerk $2.12. He said $3.18, the price having increased this week. Since I was there I gave it to him.
Today’s edition was, as usual, excellent. I am going to miss it.
$2.12 Si. $3.18 No.
If you see Arthur Siskind give him my regards.
Kevin Smith
K. Rupert Murdoch – Publisher
The Wall Street Journal
1211 Avenue of the Americas
New York, New York 10036
RE: “Time to say goodbye”
Mr. Murdoch,
Blame one of the most distinguished of your alumni for this “Dear John” letter.
It was Jude Wanniski who introduced me to what, after he said it, was a most self evident dictum
“Prices are struck on the margin.”
Today, pre-dawn, I drove past my usual news stand/coffee shop to buy the Wall Street Journal. For an unknown reason the paper has not been delivered to my usual stop for almost a year.
I drove the first half of a 5 mile round trip to get the paper. I gave the clerk $2.12. He said $3.18, the price having increased this week. Since I was there I gave it to him.
Today’s edition was, as usual, excellent. I am going to miss it.
$2.12 Si. $3.18 No.
If you see Arthur Siskind give him my regards.
Kevin Smith
December 1, 2014
RE: The price of oil and how we have chance to put a stake in the heart of, after shooting out their eyes with silver bullets, people who do not mean us well. Plus, answers for other vexing matters, the most vexing of which is why won’t we take “Yes” for an answer.
Ten cents
$2.65
$5.00/$13.00
$42.50
$6.00
$104.00
$40
When prices, particularly commodity prices, spike upwards 2 things happen
Whether you, you being the prototypical mush brained modern American Liberal whose first word after surviving the perilous journey to avoid the abortionist’s lethal pincers is “fairness”, is that the marginal user is shaken out. The lesson is simple: High prices decrease demand. The other thing, a thing that drives modern American Liberals mad, is that higher prices bring new supplies to the marketplace. Increased supply will bring prices down. It drives them mad because supply and demand and, yes, I am talking free markets here, are mechanisms that they can neither legislate nor regulate to their desires.
New supplies are a by-product of higher prices. Put differently, if eggs go to $5 a dozen the rooster lays.
It is a lesson quickly forgotten, one that must be relearned each time at a higher and higher cost. “Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other” is why the burnt finger, having found comfort in the balm of time, returns to the flame and is shocked, shocked, when the finger is burnt yet again.
It’s been almost 40 years but the Department of Energy has yet to produce a barrel of crude, either sweet or sour, or a ton of coal, either low sulfur or high. If a mirror image is sought think of the Department of Education.
If someone can show me how or where education in this country is “better” after 35 years of ham-handed Federal nit-picking I’ll be amazed.
$2.65 was what a barrel fetched when I did my first drilling deal. The leases and equipment were assembled in the fall of 1973. In 3 months the price rose to $5.00 for “old” oil and $13 for “new” oil.
I “fracked” my first well in January, 1974. Both South Texas and I survived. It was hard by Duval County where “Landslide” Lyndon sent his goombah Abe Fortas to find those missing absentee ballots. Like a hog to truffles he found them. That they were in alphabetical order is something that still confounds actuaries. Cartographers were able to follow the trail from there to a wall in Washington with 58, 625 names of dead Americans on it.
Marvin Davis, one of the elders of the Democratic Party and a card-carrying modern American Liberal, made $1,000,000,000 making “old” oil become “new” oil. That he did this without using the centuries old, closely guarded secrets of transubstantiation is worthy of examination Concupiscence is the culprit. He did it the old fashioned way. He was a crook. He put “old” oil in “new” bottles and made 160% on the trade. A lot of teeth of children of shipping clerks were straightened and a whole bunch of bass boats were bought and put to good use because of his chicanery.
On the way back from his inauguration in 1981 the great Reagan decontrolled the price of oil. Before sundown Ralph Nader was saying that old people would freeze to death before Easter because of the high price of fuel oil. In March, 1981 I got $42.50 for oil produced on my New Mexico leases. By July, 1986 the price was $6.
I sold my last working interests in various wells in 1990. The price of WTI was $27. To celebrate I took my son Sean and the remarkable Mister Moose from Bayonne to Monument Valley where we shared a John Ford/John Wayne moment.
My daughter Courtenay got a royalty check 2 years ago for oil that sold for $104 a barrel. She got checks 5 years ago for gas that sold for $13 per MM cubic feet.
Pay attention.
Here’s where it gets interesting.
“Fracking” is 60 years old. Slant drilling has been around much longer. Usually it meant you were trying to steal your neighbor’s oil.
I first heard of the Austin Chalk formation in the last years of the glorious reign of Jimmy Carter. The Bakken formation, the Eastern and Western Overthrusts, the Monterey Basin, the Eagle Ford are geologic hydrocarbon bearing formations that were not discovered in the last 5 “Summers of Recovery”. They were there 100,000,000 years before T-Rex and prey went walkabout. Scratch that. Make it 200,000,000 years.
Drilling 5,000 feet straight down, making a right angle turn, and then drilling 5,000 more feet did not come about by ukase or government fiat. The combination of first drilling and then injecting nectar to make the rock explode and give up its treasures is a testament to free men.
Somebody said “What if”, somebody else said, “Let’s try this”, and somebody else wrote a check.
It was a solution in search of a problem.
$104 oil was both part of the problem and part of the solution.
The people who own a lot of $104 oil like to behead Christians, hijack airplanes, and blow up buildings. They stopped the futile search for the elusive G-spot by cutting it off. They think slavery is OK. They cure homosexuals by hanging them, and, possibly worse, they don’t like bacon. On top of which they, after a millennium of inbreeding, are not very bright. Count how many WOGs have won Nobel Prizes. Is there an Abdul Mozart or a Yuseff Salk or a Muhammed Disney to be found in a country ruled by Sharia law? What would they do if a Martha Graham, a Ron Popeil, a Kemmons Wilson, or an Al Pacino were to appear before them? Would Ben & Jerry prosper? How many string quartets will be playing Bach in Mecca tonight? I haven’t heard anything about the 260 kidnapped Nigerian girls in a few months. How do you suppose they’re doing? I’m in the market for some good quality, low number Mohammed cartoons. Call me if you have some.
God’s Holy Trousers but when will we wake up? Evil abounds and no amount of head up our ass nonsense about multi-culturalism, diversity, sensitivity, reaching out, or other noxious nostrums can change that. 14 centuries they were half way across Europe until they ran into the last really pissed off Frenchman. 5 centuries ago they promised to stable their horses in Saint Peter’s Basilica until they met some Venetians who convinced them otherwise
It is in the best interests of this country, indeed this civilization, to drive these sand lovers back to being full time camel jockeys and goat humping paedophiles.
Speaking of paedophiles why hasn’t the name Terry Bean been plastered all over the media? He was arrested and charged with cornholing an underage male. I suppose if you raise $500,000 for President B.O. and you get to ride with him on Air Force One the modern American Liberal press gives you a mulligan. Plus, as the founder of a national Let’s Not Be Beastly to Sodomites support group, it’s the least we can do to promote our inclusive Rainbow society.
[In 1859 a very successful cartel, one that controlled reading lamp oil in this country, decided to triple – repeat – triple the price of a barrel of its product from $2 to $6. In the same year Colonel Drake punched a hole in the ground in Titusville, PA. By 1862 the killing of whales was to be found only in the pages of Herman Melville. Many are the uses of kerosene. Making it safe for Jonah to swim with his pals was not thought to be one of them.
If you tax something, and speak not of “fairness”, it being something like the horizon, something that can neither be reached nor defined, or I will take you to the dunking pool, you get less of it.
People who drill oil wells don’t do it to make life better for “single moms, usually women of color, whose sons are in need of Midnight Basketball and who are exploited by the low prices at Wal-Mart”. They don’t do it to make it easier for Florida to aggressively air condition itself. They don’t do it to make it easier for Chrysler to go in to bankruptcy, get $12,000,000,000 from the perpetually lactating mammary of the Treasury Department, thus enabling it to sell itself to an Italian company and then make Jeeps in China.
They do it because they want to be at least as rich as Croesus.
They do it because they want to be able to have people commit suicide by jumping off their wallets.
They do it because they are driven in a way that terrifies most men.
Along the way, in a manner that assaults the belief systems of mush brained, hard core modern American Liberals, the inner city mom and the Florida curmudgeon benefit from this relentless pursuit of profit.
My Uncle Adam advised the traveler not to rely on the good intentions of the innkeeper when looking to secure a good meal and night’s lodgings. He may not have any good intentions. “Appeal, therefore, to his rational self-interest.”
The free exchange of the customer’s money for the innkeeper’s goods and services benefits both and others who are not even part of the direct transaction.
The Gods have aligned the stars in such a manner that it is within our power to blow up OPEC.
If we were to team up with Canada no one would say Boo!
If Mexico learns to behave itself it we could let them join us in being the Alpha males of the hydrocarbon world.
Just drill, baby. Just drill.
Let Russia, Iran, Venezuela, Nigeria, inter alia, live with $40 oil.
If you would prefer people who have banned whistling and balloons to charge of the world’s energy so be it.
It may be our destiny, along with the Canadians and the reformed Mexicans, to “mete and dole unequal laws unto a savage race”. Who better able than us “to bear the blame of those we better and the hate of those we guard”?
Cubans and Ibos would be allowed to join.
Moving on to other things…I am not sure whether it was Al Sharpton, noted White House insider, or Jesse Jackson, noted outhouse insider, who used “hooked nose diamond merchants” as a synonym for Jews I do know that the Duke stripper is in jail for killing her boyfriend. Al Sharpton was in the White House frothing over the death of an unarmed teenager by a policeman. I am willing to be money that I don’t have that the name Dillon Taylor never came up. He was a teenager [White] who was shot by a policeman [Black]
I don’t imagine that Eric Holder will set his Federal dragoons on the trail of the 2 Black teenagers who hammered a Bosnian to death in Chicago last week. For the uninitiated you can’t get much Whiter than a Bosnian.
An unarmed White teenager was gunned down by an alleged perpetrator who proclaimed that Allah was really Akbar at this arraignment. He was graduated from Seton Hall Prep, a school with which I have a deep and abiding interest. The accused gunman was auditioning for ISIS. Will the Federal Government send its A-Team to help the Essex County prosecutors build an airtight case? Is the “No Justice, no peace” mantra reserved for only unarmed Black teenagers?
An unarmed Black teenager is dead after being confronted by 5 New York City policemen. His crime – alleged – was selling loose cigarettes, AKA “untaxed butts”. Such is the blood lust for ever increasing tax revenues that the modern American Liberal regime that governs NYC had 5 - repeat – 5 policemen apprehending entrepreneurially inclined street salesmen. Shades of Shay’s Rebellion! First whiskey; now tobacco. It is obscene that governments at all levels prosper from the sale of these evil products. If they are bad, if people die from their use, don’t tax them
Ban them.
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
PS – Ten cents was the price of a barrel of oil when the East Texas oil field began to produce in 1932. Unlike farmers guys in the oil patch don’t need help from DC when prices go in the crapper. We are now in the 5th year of record farm prices. Maybe it’s time to let the American Gothic couple make their own way in the world Maybe it’s time for Willie Nelson to take the training wheels off the bike. Why should a CPA in Roseland, NJ or a bond salesman in Edina, MN have to pony up for them.
A great burden has been lifter from my shoulders. I like Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, particularly Chocolate Therapy. I also shop at Wal-Mart. Ben & Jerry is the keeper of what is left of the American business community’s soul. Wal-Mart is a heartless exploiter of lower class Americans, people who are “unlucky in life’s lottery” and are vulnerable to the siren call of low prices.
It was cognitive dissonance at its worst.
I bought B & J Chocolate Therapy at Wal-Mart last week. That means it is OK to shop there. B & J wouldn’t sell their ice cream there if they hadn’t become good guys, would they?
Having had a teenage daughter I am very familiar, as is every parent of teenaged girls, with the “look”. With the possible exception of them being told that they would have to attend any of the really fine public high schools in Washington, DC there is no excuse for the pouting pusses of the Obama chicks. Nevertheless, cut them some slack. At least they aren’t looting, pillaging, and burning any strip malls.
The Obama girls, now being officially off limits, the gimlet eye focuses on Curley Biden’s kids. His 42 year old son was busted out of the US Navy for cocaine possession His 28 year old daughter is a foul mouthed coke head.
Let’s profile them.
Why can’t the same brush that is tarring Bill Cosby for decades old sexual assault allegations be used on Big Bill Clinton. He would have humped a snake if someone held its head.
The rest is silence…almost
RE: The price of oil and how we have chance to put a stake in the heart of, after shooting out their eyes with silver bullets, people who do not mean us well. Plus, answers for other vexing matters, the most vexing of which is why won’t we take “Yes” for an answer.
Ten cents
$2.65
$5.00/$13.00
$42.50
$6.00
$104.00
$40
When prices, particularly commodity prices, spike upwards 2 things happen
Whether you, you being the prototypical mush brained modern American Liberal whose first word after surviving the perilous journey to avoid the abortionist’s lethal pincers is “fairness”, is that the marginal user is shaken out. The lesson is simple: High prices decrease demand. The other thing, a thing that drives modern American Liberals mad, is that higher prices bring new supplies to the marketplace. Increased supply will bring prices down. It drives them mad because supply and demand and, yes, I am talking free markets here, are mechanisms that they can neither legislate nor regulate to their desires.
New supplies are a by-product of higher prices. Put differently, if eggs go to $5 a dozen the rooster lays.
It is a lesson quickly forgotten, one that must be relearned each time at a higher and higher cost. “Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other” is why the burnt finger, having found comfort in the balm of time, returns to the flame and is shocked, shocked, when the finger is burnt yet again.
It’s been almost 40 years but the Department of Energy has yet to produce a barrel of crude, either sweet or sour, or a ton of coal, either low sulfur or high. If a mirror image is sought think of the Department of Education.
If someone can show me how or where education in this country is “better” after 35 years of ham-handed Federal nit-picking I’ll be amazed.
$2.65 was what a barrel fetched when I did my first drilling deal. The leases and equipment were assembled in the fall of 1973. In 3 months the price rose to $5.00 for “old” oil and $13 for “new” oil.
I “fracked” my first well in January, 1974. Both South Texas and I survived. It was hard by Duval County where “Landslide” Lyndon sent his goombah Abe Fortas to find those missing absentee ballots. Like a hog to truffles he found them. That they were in alphabetical order is something that still confounds actuaries. Cartographers were able to follow the trail from there to a wall in Washington with 58, 625 names of dead Americans on it.
Marvin Davis, one of the elders of the Democratic Party and a card-carrying modern American Liberal, made $1,000,000,000 making “old” oil become “new” oil. That he did this without using the centuries old, closely guarded secrets of transubstantiation is worthy of examination Concupiscence is the culprit. He did it the old fashioned way. He was a crook. He put “old” oil in “new” bottles and made 160% on the trade. A lot of teeth of children of shipping clerks were straightened and a whole bunch of bass boats were bought and put to good use because of his chicanery.
On the way back from his inauguration in 1981 the great Reagan decontrolled the price of oil. Before sundown Ralph Nader was saying that old people would freeze to death before Easter because of the high price of fuel oil. In March, 1981 I got $42.50 for oil produced on my New Mexico leases. By July, 1986 the price was $6.
I sold my last working interests in various wells in 1990. The price of WTI was $27. To celebrate I took my son Sean and the remarkable Mister Moose from Bayonne to Monument Valley where we shared a John Ford/John Wayne moment.
My daughter Courtenay got a royalty check 2 years ago for oil that sold for $104 a barrel. She got checks 5 years ago for gas that sold for $13 per MM cubic feet.
Pay attention.
Here’s where it gets interesting.
“Fracking” is 60 years old. Slant drilling has been around much longer. Usually it meant you were trying to steal your neighbor’s oil.
I first heard of the Austin Chalk formation in the last years of the glorious reign of Jimmy Carter. The Bakken formation, the Eastern and Western Overthrusts, the Monterey Basin, the Eagle Ford are geologic hydrocarbon bearing formations that were not discovered in the last 5 “Summers of Recovery”. They were there 100,000,000 years before T-Rex and prey went walkabout. Scratch that. Make it 200,000,000 years.
Drilling 5,000 feet straight down, making a right angle turn, and then drilling 5,000 more feet did not come about by ukase or government fiat. The combination of first drilling and then injecting nectar to make the rock explode and give up its treasures is a testament to free men.
Somebody said “What if”, somebody else said, “Let’s try this”, and somebody else wrote a check.
It was a solution in search of a problem.
$104 oil was both part of the problem and part of the solution.
The people who own a lot of $104 oil like to behead Christians, hijack airplanes, and blow up buildings. They stopped the futile search for the elusive G-spot by cutting it off. They think slavery is OK. They cure homosexuals by hanging them, and, possibly worse, they don’t like bacon. On top of which they, after a millennium of inbreeding, are not very bright. Count how many WOGs have won Nobel Prizes. Is there an Abdul Mozart or a Yuseff Salk or a Muhammed Disney to be found in a country ruled by Sharia law? What would they do if a Martha Graham, a Ron Popeil, a Kemmons Wilson, or an Al Pacino were to appear before them? Would Ben & Jerry prosper? How many string quartets will be playing Bach in Mecca tonight? I haven’t heard anything about the 260 kidnapped Nigerian girls in a few months. How do you suppose they’re doing? I’m in the market for some good quality, low number Mohammed cartoons. Call me if you have some.
God’s Holy Trousers but when will we wake up? Evil abounds and no amount of head up our ass nonsense about multi-culturalism, diversity, sensitivity, reaching out, or other noxious nostrums can change that. 14 centuries they were half way across Europe until they ran into the last really pissed off Frenchman. 5 centuries ago they promised to stable their horses in Saint Peter’s Basilica until they met some Venetians who convinced them otherwise
It is in the best interests of this country, indeed this civilization, to drive these sand lovers back to being full time camel jockeys and goat humping paedophiles.
Speaking of paedophiles why hasn’t the name Terry Bean been plastered all over the media? He was arrested and charged with cornholing an underage male. I suppose if you raise $500,000 for President B.O. and you get to ride with him on Air Force One the modern American Liberal press gives you a mulligan. Plus, as the founder of a national Let’s Not Be Beastly to Sodomites support group, it’s the least we can do to promote our inclusive Rainbow society.
[In 1859 a very successful cartel, one that controlled reading lamp oil in this country, decided to triple – repeat – triple the price of a barrel of its product from $2 to $6. In the same year Colonel Drake punched a hole in the ground in Titusville, PA. By 1862 the killing of whales was to be found only in the pages of Herman Melville. Many are the uses of kerosene. Making it safe for Jonah to swim with his pals was not thought to be one of them.
If you tax something, and speak not of “fairness”, it being something like the horizon, something that can neither be reached nor defined, or I will take you to the dunking pool, you get less of it.
People who drill oil wells don’t do it to make life better for “single moms, usually women of color, whose sons are in need of Midnight Basketball and who are exploited by the low prices at Wal-Mart”. They don’t do it to make it easier for Florida to aggressively air condition itself. They don’t do it to make it easier for Chrysler to go in to bankruptcy, get $12,000,000,000 from the perpetually lactating mammary of the Treasury Department, thus enabling it to sell itself to an Italian company and then make Jeeps in China.
They do it because they want to be at least as rich as Croesus.
They do it because they want to be able to have people commit suicide by jumping off their wallets.
They do it because they are driven in a way that terrifies most men.
Along the way, in a manner that assaults the belief systems of mush brained, hard core modern American Liberals, the inner city mom and the Florida curmudgeon benefit from this relentless pursuit of profit.
My Uncle Adam advised the traveler not to rely on the good intentions of the innkeeper when looking to secure a good meal and night’s lodgings. He may not have any good intentions. “Appeal, therefore, to his rational self-interest.”
The free exchange of the customer’s money for the innkeeper’s goods and services benefits both and others who are not even part of the direct transaction.
The Gods have aligned the stars in such a manner that it is within our power to blow up OPEC.
If we were to team up with Canada no one would say Boo!
If Mexico learns to behave itself it we could let them join us in being the Alpha males of the hydrocarbon world.
Just drill, baby. Just drill.
Let Russia, Iran, Venezuela, Nigeria, inter alia, live with $40 oil.
If you would prefer people who have banned whistling and balloons to charge of the world’s energy so be it.
It may be our destiny, along with the Canadians and the reformed Mexicans, to “mete and dole unequal laws unto a savage race”. Who better able than us “to bear the blame of those we better and the hate of those we guard”?
Cubans and Ibos would be allowed to join.
Moving on to other things…I am not sure whether it was Al Sharpton, noted White House insider, or Jesse Jackson, noted outhouse insider, who used “hooked nose diamond merchants” as a synonym for Jews I do know that the Duke stripper is in jail for killing her boyfriend. Al Sharpton was in the White House frothing over the death of an unarmed teenager by a policeman. I am willing to be money that I don’t have that the name Dillon Taylor never came up. He was a teenager [White] who was shot by a policeman [Black]
I don’t imagine that Eric Holder will set his Federal dragoons on the trail of the 2 Black teenagers who hammered a Bosnian to death in Chicago last week. For the uninitiated you can’t get much Whiter than a Bosnian.
An unarmed White teenager was gunned down by an alleged perpetrator who proclaimed that Allah was really Akbar at this arraignment. He was graduated from Seton Hall Prep, a school with which I have a deep and abiding interest. The accused gunman was auditioning for ISIS. Will the Federal Government send its A-Team to help the Essex County prosecutors build an airtight case? Is the “No Justice, no peace” mantra reserved for only unarmed Black teenagers?
An unarmed Black teenager is dead after being confronted by 5 New York City policemen. His crime – alleged – was selling loose cigarettes, AKA “untaxed butts”. Such is the blood lust for ever increasing tax revenues that the modern American Liberal regime that governs NYC had 5 - repeat – 5 policemen apprehending entrepreneurially inclined street salesmen. Shades of Shay’s Rebellion! First whiskey; now tobacco. It is obscene that governments at all levels prosper from the sale of these evil products. If they are bad, if people die from their use, don’t tax them
Ban them.
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
PS – Ten cents was the price of a barrel of oil when the East Texas oil field began to produce in 1932. Unlike farmers guys in the oil patch don’t need help from DC when prices go in the crapper. We are now in the 5th year of record farm prices. Maybe it’s time to let the American Gothic couple make their own way in the world Maybe it’s time for Willie Nelson to take the training wheels off the bike. Why should a CPA in Roseland, NJ or a bond salesman in Edina, MN have to pony up for them.
A great burden has been lifter from my shoulders. I like Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, particularly Chocolate Therapy. I also shop at Wal-Mart. Ben & Jerry is the keeper of what is left of the American business community’s soul. Wal-Mart is a heartless exploiter of lower class Americans, people who are “unlucky in life’s lottery” and are vulnerable to the siren call of low prices.
It was cognitive dissonance at its worst.
I bought B & J Chocolate Therapy at Wal-Mart last week. That means it is OK to shop there. B & J wouldn’t sell their ice cream there if they hadn’t become good guys, would they?
Having had a teenage daughter I am very familiar, as is every parent of teenaged girls, with the “look”. With the possible exception of them being told that they would have to attend any of the really fine public high schools in Washington, DC there is no excuse for the pouting pusses of the Obama chicks. Nevertheless, cut them some slack. At least they aren’t looting, pillaging, and burning any strip malls.
The Obama girls, now being officially off limits, the gimlet eye focuses on Curley Biden’s kids. His 42 year old son was busted out of the US Navy for cocaine possession His 28 year old daughter is a foul mouthed coke head.
Let’s profile them.
Why can’t the same brush that is tarring Bill Cosby for decades old sexual assault allegations be used on Big Bill Clinton. He would have humped a snake if someone held its head.
The rest is silence…almost
Thursday, November 27, 2014
November 26, 2014
Fabiola Santiago
The Miami Herald
3511 NW 91st street
Miami, FL 33172
RE: Will there ever be an end to troubled days? – Some comments on your column of the woes of Ferguson and how they may come here.
Sra. Santiago,
As a “white non-Hispanic” – to paraphrase the New York Times, still the proud home of Walter Duranty – I have to watch what I say lest the Word Police think ill of me.
Let us stipulate that any man’s death diminishes us. Further, a parent burying a child upsets the harmonic balance of the universe
Let me jump ahead.
“True, during the past 30 years caring people have rolled up
their sleeves and come together to work on race relations…”
Today
You
Exactly what did these “caring people”, sleeved or sleeveless, do? What was the formula that produced whatever racial progress was made here? Is it replicable?
Page 1 of the Herald tells of “unrest in Ferguson”.
Page 3 of the second section reports the arrest of Fredderick Parks for the murder of Khambrell Manning and the attempted murder of Trannard Gray at Carol city High School.
Since this was a Black on Black crime it made nary a ripple on the media’s perpetually roiling sea of race relations in America. [Even mentioning Black on Black crime will raise the dudgeon of the PC adjudicators. vide Mayor Giuliani]
Michael Brown, an unarmed teenager who was shot and killed by a policeman, is going to be dead for a very long time. Dillon Taylor, another unarmed teenager who was shot and killed by policeman, is going to be dead just as long.
Why is there not comparable outrage?
Would I be branded with “R”, the new Scarlet Letter, the one standing for Racist, if I were to point out that Michael Brown was an unarmed Black teenager who was shot and killed by a White policeman while Dillon Taylor was an unarmed White teenager who shot and Killed by a Black policeman.
For reasons incomprehensible to me the New York Times, the Keeper of the Seals of Journalistic Propriety, thought it was fit and proper to publish the home address of the White policeman who shot and killed the unarmed Black teenager. Somehow the term “community activist” belongs in there.
The home address of the Black policeman who shot and killed the unarmed White teenager is unknown and likely to stay that way.
You say that while “we are proud of our own multi-racial, multi-ethnic city, there’s still a black and white divide, a class divide, and a political divide…”
Would convening a cadre of “caring people” close those divides? Although we have a President who said last year “I am not an Emperor”, this year he acted like he was one, and not one of the good ones either, by ignoring the Law and operating under “Caesar dixit” fiat rules.
Why doesn’t the President just issue an edict, via an Executive Order, and outlaw, ban and banish the ‘’black and white divide”? If you can think of one law that would do so how could any man of good will oppose it? Besides, if it didn’t work the Boss could change it.
This I know.
I cannot be made to give something I do not possess.
Kevin Smith
Fabiola Santiago
The Miami Herald
3511 NW 91st street
Miami, FL 33172
RE: Will there ever be an end to troubled days? – Some comments on your column of the woes of Ferguson and how they may come here.
Sra. Santiago,
As a “white non-Hispanic” – to paraphrase the New York Times, still the proud home of Walter Duranty – I have to watch what I say lest the Word Police think ill of me.
Let us stipulate that any man’s death diminishes us. Further, a parent burying a child upsets the harmonic balance of the universe
Let me jump ahead.
“True, during the past 30 years caring people have rolled up
their sleeves and come together to work on race relations…”
Today
You
Exactly what did these “caring people”, sleeved or sleeveless, do? What was the formula that produced whatever racial progress was made here? Is it replicable?
Page 1 of the Herald tells of “unrest in Ferguson”.
Page 3 of the second section reports the arrest of Fredderick Parks for the murder of Khambrell Manning and the attempted murder of Trannard Gray at Carol city High School.
Since this was a Black on Black crime it made nary a ripple on the media’s perpetually roiling sea of race relations in America. [Even mentioning Black on Black crime will raise the dudgeon of the PC adjudicators. vide Mayor Giuliani]
Michael Brown, an unarmed teenager who was shot and killed by a policeman, is going to be dead for a very long time. Dillon Taylor, another unarmed teenager who was shot and killed by policeman, is going to be dead just as long.
Why is there not comparable outrage?
Would I be branded with “R”, the new Scarlet Letter, the one standing for Racist, if I were to point out that Michael Brown was an unarmed Black teenager who was shot and killed by a White policeman while Dillon Taylor was an unarmed White teenager who shot and Killed by a Black policeman.
For reasons incomprehensible to me the New York Times, the Keeper of the Seals of Journalistic Propriety, thought it was fit and proper to publish the home address of the White policeman who shot and killed the unarmed Black teenager. Somehow the term “community activist” belongs in there.
The home address of the Black policeman who shot and killed the unarmed White teenager is unknown and likely to stay that way.
You say that while “we are proud of our own multi-racial, multi-ethnic city, there’s still a black and white divide, a class divide, and a political divide…”
Would convening a cadre of “caring people” close those divides? Although we have a President who said last year “I am not an Emperor”, this year he acted like he was one, and not one of the good ones either, by ignoring the Law and operating under “Caesar dixit” fiat rules.
Why doesn’t the President just issue an edict, via an Executive Order, and outlaw, ban and banish the ‘’black and white divide”? If you can think of one law that would do so how could any man of good will oppose it? Besides, if it didn’t work the Boss could change it.
This I know.
I cannot be made to give something I do not possess.
Kevin Smith
November 26, 2014
Albert R. Hunt
Bloomberg News
1399 New York Avenue
Washington, DC 20005
RE: Who says all turkeys are foul? – Some comments on your achingly modern American Liberal column on “the triumph of hope over experience” in today’s Sun Sentinel.
Mr. Bloomberg,
‘Twas the night before Thanksgiving and all through the house not a creature was stirring….except for the literate curmudgeon who reads and remembers.
It’s been a while since I’ve written you about your philosophical and ideological shortcomings. You have, so far, a remarkable talent for misstating the obvious and how proud you are to be an alumnus of the Gruber School of Reporting.
I was watching the 6:00 News. Don’t ask. Of course it was Fox. I chose to switch from political absurdity to cinematic absurdity. The only choice was “Seinfeld” since Professor Irwin Corey and Beckett were not renewed. I marvel, even in reruns, how George Costanza avoids very serious beatings, real Texas-sized ass kickings, and then repeated defenestration from progressively higher floors until his mug has the texture of warm tapioca and his joints feel like oatmeal.
Alas, even alack, but it was not sufficient
The last choice was your column
Bingo!
The two most prominent turds in your punch bowl are:
#1 – “major infrastructure spending” – Am I the only one left in America who remembers “Shovel Ready Jobs”? I recall $900,000,000,000 – that’s nine hundred billion – being the magic number that would lead us to a never ending “Summer of Recovery”. The Mandarin money lenders, the ones that Hillary Clinton warned us about for her 8 years in the Senate, want to know how their loan is doing.
#2 – “We need to tilt the playing field in favor of rather than against unions”- I was a Teamster. I paid dues to Anthony Provenzano, AKA Tony Pro. Whatever else he may have been he was a man who knew the buttered side from the dry, a man about whom it could be said that he had a moral clarity shining around him.
That brings me to the goons from SEIU and the goons from AFSCME. They would toss a coin to see who would first get to greet a female Wisconsin legislator with “Good morning, cocksucker” or “Good morning, you fucking cocksucker”. Wouldn’t Samuel Gompers be proud.
If memory serves the point of contention was Governor Scott Walker and his attempts to enforce the laws surrounding gravity. If memory further serves he won 3 elections in 4 years
Game, set, and match.
And these are the people you want to tilt the playing field in favor of?
On a more personal note…is your wife only paid 77% of what her male counterparts earn? If that is the case you need to get down to the studio and kick some serious ass. Please don’t let Nancy Pelosi know that she only makes 77% of what John Boehner makes. If she finds out she will make all the other shrews in D.C. turn into Mary Poppins. I mean that vixen sneezes bile. Her dandruff is venomous.
You say, without a hint of sarcasm, that the Democrats would have held the Senate if they had gotten more votes. That’s like saying the Syrian Air Force would be better than the Israeli Air Force is they didn’t keep getting its planes shot down. I search for an appropriate epitaph for Marion Barry other than quoting him saying “If you forget the murder rate Washington is a safe city”. Cuba has been an OK place to live since the Castros took over. They have 3 continuing problems; breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
There is no sense in being a half-assed modern American Liberal horse’s ass when you can be a modern American Liberal horse’s ass of gargantuan proportions.
You cite Professor Alan Krueger, a true fiend of the blue collar worker, a man who would need instructions on which is the business end of a shovel, a man who has never signed the front of a paycheck, who cites German models for increasing worker participation – German models? Didn’t they get the trains, the express trains to Auschwitz, to run on time? – in the new economy, an economy based on the Solyndra model, Cash for Clunkers, with input from Venezuela and Zimbabwe.
Then I switched back to TV to watch Duck Dynasty in Scotland. The entire Robertson family – and may I say that I love Uncle Si but God Bless Phil – went to Scotland to sell their duck calls.
God Bless America! As the legendary Big Mike from Bayonne still says, “That’s why you never see anybody swimming to Cuba”.
George Costanza, you, Cajuns in Caledonia. It doesn’t get any better than this.
Not so fast.
People in Ferguson, Missouri are so pissed off that they are burning their town down. It’s the last piece of the puzzle.
The boobies are running the hatch.
“Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity
“I’ll retire to Bedlam” where Kramer makes perfect sense.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Kevin Smith
Albert R. Hunt
Bloomberg News
1399 New York Avenue
Washington, DC 20005
RE: Who says all turkeys are foul? – Some comments on your achingly modern American Liberal column on “the triumph of hope over experience” in today’s Sun Sentinel.
Mr. Bloomberg,
‘Twas the night before Thanksgiving and all through the house not a creature was stirring….except for the literate curmudgeon who reads and remembers.
It’s been a while since I’ve written you about your philosophical and ideological shortcomings. You have, so far, a remarkable talent for misstating the obvious and how proud you are to be an alumnus of the Gruber School of Reporting.
I was watching the 6:00 News. Don’t ask. Of course it was Fox. I chose to switch from political absurdity to cinematic absurdity. The only choice was “Seinfeld” since Professor Irwin Corey and Beckett were not renewed. I marvel, even in reruns, how George Costanza avoids very serious beatings, real Texas-sized ass kickings, and then repeated defenestration from progressively higher floors until his mug has the texture of warm tapioca and his joints feel like oatmeal.
Alas, even alack, but it was not sufficient
The last choice was your column
Bingo!
The two most prominent turds in your punch bowl are:
#1 – “major infrastructure spending” – Am I the only one left in America who remembers “Shovel Ready Jobs”? I recall $900,000,000,000 – that’s nine hundred billion – being the magic number that would lead us to a never ending “Summer of Recovery”. The Mandarin money lenders, the ones that Hillary Clinton warned us about for her 8 years in the Senate, want to know how their loan is doing.
#2 – “We need to tilt the playing field in favor of rather than against unions”- I was a Teamster. I paid dues to Anthony Provenzano, AKA Tony Pro. Whatever else he may have been he was a man who knew the buttered side from the dry, a man about whom it could be said that he had a moral clarity shining around him.
That brings me to the goons from SEIU and the goons from AFSCME. They would toss a coin to see who would first get to greet a female Wisconsin legislator with “Good morning, cocksucker” or “Good morning, you fucking cocksucker”. Wouldn’t Samuel Gompers be proud.
If memory serves the point of contention was Governor Scott Walker and his attempts to enforce the laws surrounding gravity. If memory further serves he won 3 elections in 4 years
Game, set, and match.
And these are the people you want to tilt the playing field in favor of?
On a more personal note…is your wife only paid 77% of what her male counterparts earn? If that is the case you need to get down to the studio and kick some serious ass. Please don’t let Nancy Pelosi know that she only makes 77% of what John Boehner makes. If she finds out she will make all the other shrews in D.C. turn into Mary Poppins. I mean that vixen sneezes bile. Her dandruff is venomous.
You say, without a hint of sarcasm, that the Democrats would have held the Senate if they had gotten more votes. That’s like saying the Syrian Air Force would be better than the Israeli Air Force is they didn’t keep getting its planes shot down. I search for an appropriate epitaph for Marion Barry other than quoting him saying “If you forget the murder rate Washington is a safe city”. Cuba has been an OK place to live since the Castros took over. They have 3 continuing problems; breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
There is no sense in being a half-assed modern American Liberal horse’s ass when you can be a modern American Liberal horse’s ass of gargantuan proportions.
You cite Professor Alan Krueger, a true fiend of the blue collar worker, a man who would need instructions on which is the business end of a shovel, a man who has never signed the front of a paycheck, who cites German models for increasing worker participation – German models? Didn’t they get the trains, the express trains to Auschwitz, to run on time? – in the new economy, an economy based on the Solyndra model, Cash for Clunkers, with input from Venezuela and Zimbabwe.
Then I switched back to TV to watch Duck Dynasty in Scotland. The entire Robertson family – and may I say that I love Uncle Si but God Bless Phil – went to Scotland to sell their duck calls.
God Bless America! As the legendary Big Mike from Bayonne still says, “That’s why you never see anybody swimming to Cuba”.
George Costanza, you, Cajuns in Caledonia. It doesn’t get any better than this.
Not so fast.
People in Ferguson, Missouri are so pissed off that they are burning their town down. It’s the last piece of the puzzle.
The boobies are running the hatch.
“Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity
“I’ll retire to Bedlam” where Kramer makes perfect sense.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Kevin Smith
November 25, 2014
W. Tandy Grubbs, PhD – Department of Chemistry
Stetson University
421 N. Woodland Blvd.
DeLand, FL 33273
My dear Professor,
The first thing that leaps out of your musings on “Reaping the Benefits of Green Power will require personal Sacrifice” is that you should stick to polymers.
The reason is empirically self-evident.
“The real significance of this non-binding agreement:
China is finally at the negotiating table.”
I don’t know if History is taught at Stetson. If it isn’t, Google “Munich”. Using your criterion the world is still rejoicing because “Nazi Germany is finally at the negotiating table”.
How did that work pout?
[Here’s a negotiating tip from my Uncle Adam, the noted tax collector and philosopher: Never rely on the other guy’s better nature. He may not have one.]
The next clue to your leading role in the Gruber School of Directing the untermenschen is your use of the words “sacrifice” and “mandate”.
Part and parcel, warp and woof pf modern American Liberal academics is when they call on someone else to give something up. [I’ll offer an alternative in a bit] Further, it is quickly followed by “If you don’t do what’s best for you we’ll make you”.
One of the dirty little secrets of modern American Liberalism, both in the political arena and academia, is that they are all wanabee Fascists. [Has Stetson sponsored a reprise of the Mohammed cartoons, the ones showing him as a goat humping paedophile? Free speech and universities are synonymous, aren’t they?]
“We” know better. “We” are blessed with “non-malodorous fecal matter syndrome” without which we would be unable to tell you what to do. It enables you, a la Professor Gruber, to lie, cheat, steal, swindle, bamboozle, hornswoggle, euchre – Did I say lie? – the American public.
“We” silently offer a te deum because, without us all the knuckle dragging, Fox News fanatical Wal-Mart shoppers wouldn’t have the sense to come in out of the rain.
When you say “there is not enough arable land…” I reached for my PROUD GLOBAL WARMER ball cap.
See if you can follow this. I will type slowly.
Global Warming ended the last Ice Age. Too bad for the mastodons but it sure as helped all those struggling bi-peds who were finally figuring out what to do with their thumbs. When temperatures climb land, previously barren, becomes more arable. More protein becomes more available to more people. They get smarter. There was an upward spike in temperature in Europe 10 centuries ago. We wound up with the Renaissance. Do you have a problem with Dante? Sorry about that. Do you know who Dante is?
He wrote
“Halfway through my journey I found myself in the dark wood of error”
That may have been a good line in 1300 but it doesn’t apply here, what with all the science being “settled”, right?
In the end you call for “heavy government subsidies” to help us reach the horizon where the Land of Milk, Honey, Rainbow Stew, and Balloon Juice sits calling us. Would it would be impolite to point out that the foetid, Gehenna-like, dung heap behind the tree of all knowledge is what is left of Solyndra, speaking of “heavy government subsidies”?
How we are to pay for theses blessing is left blank but true to the canons of modern American Liberalism can a “fairer tax code” be far behind?
You ask with nary a hint of mirth or we “must sacrifice” by “accepting a lower standard of living” so that we can keep Venice from being totally underwater, to “undrown” baby seal killing polar bears….
“Such stupidity, sir, is not to be found in nature’
There is one thing you can do. It is squarely in the 10 ring of “Think Globally;
Act Locally”.
Give up air conditioning. Give it up in your house. Give it up in your car. Most importantly, give it up where you work. As Chairman of the Chemistry department just turn them off. Dispose of them in an environmentally sensitive manner. Artificial reefs, perhaps. Then turn them off in your classrooms. Open the windows and praise Gaia. Your classes will be overflowing.
Get back to me.
Kevin Smith
PS – I must tell you that back in the late’70s, back when Global Cooling was the churl that was used to scare small children, I used to spray Right Guard deodorant out my bathroom window. “Damn the Ozone Layer”, I yelled every AM. Thank God Vice President Alpha Gump saved it and us.
W. Tandy Grubbs, PhD – Department of Chemistry
Stetson University
421 N. Woodland Blvd.
DeLand, FL 33273
My dear Professor,
The first thing that leaps out of your musings on “Reaping the Benefits of Green Power will require personal Sacrifice” is that you should stick to polymers.
The reason is empirically self-evident.
“The real significance of this non-binding agreement:
China is finally at the negotiating table.”
I don’t know if History is taught at Stetson. If it isn’t, Google “Munich”. Using your criterion the world is still rejoicing because “Nazi Germany is finally at the negotiating table”.
How did that work pout?
[Here’s a negotiating tip from my Uncle Adam, the noted tax collector and philosopher: Never rely on the other guy’s better nature. He may not have one.]
The next clue to your leading role in the Gruber School of Directing the untermenschen is your use of the words “sacrifice” and “mandate”.
Part and parcel, warp and woof pf modern American Liberal academics is when they call on someone else to give something up. [I’ll offer an alternative in a bit] Further, it is quickly followed by “If you don’t do what’s best for you we’ll make you”.
One of the dirty little secrets of modern American Liberalism, both in the political arena and academia, is that they are all wanabee Fascists. [Has Stetson sponsored a reprise of the Mohammed cartoons, the ones showing him as a goat humping paedophile? Free speech and universities are synonymous, aren’t they?]
“We” know better. “We” are blessed with “non-malodorous fecal matter syndrome” without which we would be unable to tell you what to do. It enables you, a la Professor Gruber, to lie, cheat, steal, swindle, bamboozle, hornswoggle, euchre – Did I say lie? – the American public.
“We” silently offer a te deum because, without us all the knuckle dragging, Fox News fanatical Wal-Mart shoppers wouldn’t have the sense to come in out of the rain.
When you say “there is not enough arable land…” I reached for my PROUD GLOBAL WARMER ball cap.
See if you can follow this. I will type slowly.
Global Warming ended the last Ice Age. Too bad for the mastodons but it sure as helped all those struggling bi-peds who were finally figuring out what to do with their thumbs. When temperatures climb land, previously barren, becomes more arable. More protein becomes more available to more people. They get smarter. There was an upward spike in temperature in Europe 10 centuries ago. We wound up with the Renaissance. Do you have a problem with Dante? Sorry about that. Do you know who Dante is?
He wrote
“Halfway through my journey I found myself in the dark wood of error”
That may have been a good line in 1300 but it doesn’t apply here, what with all the science being “settled”, right?
In the end you call for “heavy government subsidies” to help us reach the horizon where the Land of Milk, Honey, Rainbow Stew, and Balloon Juice sits calling us. Would it would be impolite to point out that the foetid, Gehenna-like, dung heap behind the tree of all knowledge is what is left of Solyndra, speaking of “heavy government subsidies”?
How we are to pay for theses blessing is left blank but true to the canons of modern American Liberalism can a “fairer tax code” be far behind?
You ask with nary a hint of mirth or we “must sacrifice” by “accepting a lower standard of living” so that we can keep Venice from being totally underwater, to “undrown” baby seal killing polar bears….
“Such stupidity, sir, is not to be found in nature’
There is one thing you can do. It is squarely in the 10 ring of “Think Globally;
Act Locally”.
Give up air conditioning. Give it up in your house. Give it up in your car. Most importantly, give it up where you work. As Chairman of the Chemistry department just turn them off. Dispose of them in an environmentally sensitive manner. Artificial reefs, perhaps. Then turn them off in your classrooms. Open the windows and praise Gaia. Your classes will be overflowing.
Get back to me.
Kevin Smith
PS – I must tell you that back in the late’70s, back when Global Cooling was the churl that was used to scare small children, I used to spray Right Guard deodorant out my bathroom window. “Damn the Ozone Layer”, I yelled every AM. Thank God Vice President Alpha Gump saved it and us.
Monday, November 24, 2014
November 24, 2014
Donna Shalala - President
The University of Miami
Coral Gables, FL 33124
RE: Overcoming the perpetual lack of a prostate gland - Some comments on your thoughts on Common Core educational standards becoming the starting line for gender equity, particularly the gender pay gap.
Madame President,
Is Logic still taught at the University of Miami? [Logic is the capstone of the Trivium and why do I think that it is an alien word in Coral Gables?]
I do not know the salaries of the Presidents of Stanford University, Rice University, Northwestern University, or New York University. I pledge that if we take the average salary of those 5 CEOs, and you are paid 77% of that number, I will lead a fund raising drive to make up the difference.
Was Janet Reno paid 77% of what Eric Holder was paid when they were Attorneys General of the United States?
Is Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz paid 77% of what Congressman Alcee Hastings is paid?
Was Condoleeza Rice paid 77% of what John Kerry is paid when both were Secretaries of State? Did she take a further hit because she is a Black female? 77% of 77%, perhaps.
Are female astronauts – astronettes? – paid 77% of what their male contemporaries earn?
My mail is usually late when it is delivered by my non-male mail man. Would the 77% pay gap be a mitigating factor? And speaking of male/female conundrums, do you think it is time to change man hole cover to person hole cover? Would person/person be an acceptable replacement for mail man, particularly if there is a preponderance of male mail men?
PI is 3.1416. If we were to make it 3.0 would that make it easier for girls to become hedge fund managers, Oval Office interns, and “lawyers and doctors and such”?
Are you telling me that as of today gender discrimination starts in early grammar school?
If you are not familiar with it Post Hoc Propter Ergo Hoc is not, never was, and never will be an acceptable answer, even to those who are unfamiliar with critical thinking.
You may want to brush up on your Logic.
Forgive me but I can’t resist the siren-like allure – Is that sexist per se? - when you say “glass ceiling”? How did it feel to be paid only 77% of what your predecessor made when you were a cabinet officer under President Clinton? [Do you remember telling the nation in 1997 that we would all die from AIDs in 10 years? My calendar says 2014. I like playing with house money, don’t you? It gives new meaning to the term “borrowed time”.]
When Bill Clinton was elected Attorney General of Arkansas his wife was hired by the largest law firm in Little Rock, Arkansas. When he was elected Governor of Arkansas she was made a partner by the largest law firm in Little Rock, Arkansas. When she was made an outside director of Wal-Mart it was the largest employer in Arkansas. I suppose it was just a coincidence that her husband was Governor of Arkansas, don’t you think? When her husband got to the White House he gave her the health care system of the United States to tinker with. It kept her occupied when he was mentoring interns on how to play “Hide the Salami”. Is that what you mean when you mention “eliminating the glass ceiling”?
Kevin Smith
PS – Could you find out if Wordsworth is still on the chick-lit shit list? If he is I won’t plant any daffodils.
Donna Shalala - President
The University of Miami
Coral Gables, FL 33124
RE: Overcoming the perpetual lack of a prostate gland - Some comments on your thoughts on Common Core educational standards becoming the starting line for gender equity, particularly the gender pay gap.
Madame President,
Is Logic still taught at the University of Miami? [Logic is the capstone of the Trivium and why do I think that it is an alien word in Coral Gables?]
I do not know the salaries of the Presidents of Stanford University, Rice University, Northwestern University, or New York University. I pledge that if we take the average salary of those 5 CEOs, and you are paid 77% of that number, I will lead a fund raising drive to make up the difference.
Was Janet Reno paid 77% of what Eric Holder was paid when they were Attorneys General of the United States?
Is Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman-Schultz paid 77% of what Congressman Alcee Hastings is paid?
Was Condoleeza Rice paid 77% of what John Kerry is paid when both were Secretaries of State? Did she take a further hit because she is a Black female? 77% of 77%, perhaps.
Are female astronauts – astronettes? – paid 77% of what their male contemporaries earn?
My mail is usually late when it is delivered by my non-male mail man. Would the 77% pay gap be a mitigating factor? And speaking of male/female conundrums, do you think it is time to change man hole cover to person hole cover? Would person/person be an acceptable replacement for mail man, particularly if there is a preponderance of male mail men?
PI is 3.1416. If we were to make it 3.0 would that make it easier for girls to become hedge fund managers, Oval Office interns, and “lawyers and doctors and such”?
Are you telling me that as of today gender discrimination starts in early grammar school?
If you are not familiar with it Post Hoc Propter Ergo Hoc is not, never was, and never will be an acceptable answer, even to those who are unfamiliar with critical thinking.
You may want to brush up on your Logic.
Forgive me but I can’t resist the siren-like allure – Is that sexist per se? - when you say “glass ceiling”? How did it feel to be paid only 77% of what your predecessor made when you were a cabinet officer under President Clinton? [Do you remember telling the nation in 1997 that we would all die from AIDs in 10 years? My calendar says 2014. I like playing with house money, don’t you? It gives new meaning to the term “borrowed time”.]
When Bill Clinton was elected Attorney General of Arkansas his wife was hired by the largest law firm in Little Rock, Arkansas. When he was elected Governor of Arkansas she was made a partner by the largest law firm in Little Rock, Arkansas. When she was made an outside director of Wal-Mart it was the largest employer in Arkansas. I suppose it was just a coincidence that her husband was Governor of Arkansas, don’t you think? When her husband got to the White House he gave her the health care system of the United States to tinker with. It kept her occupied when he was mentoring interns on how to play “Hide the Salami”. Is that what you mean when you mention “eliminating the glass ceiling”?
Kevin Smith
PS – Could you find out if Wordsworth is still on the chick-lit shit list? If he is I won’t plant any daffodils.
Monday, November 17, 2014
Sunday, November 16, 2014
November 16, 2014
Robert Steinbach
The Sun Sentinel
Mr. Steinbach,
I am facing a dilemma.
The Great Reagan used to say that it was not so much that Liberals were stupid as it is it that there’s so much that they don’t know.
The obverse is that when I finished one of my Socratic tutorials Amy, my wife of late and happy memory, would say “That’s why people never ask us back”.
#1 – Wikipedia is a jumping off point. It is not a place of critical thinking. It is, however, a place where it can begin. The Congressional Record has similar status. When C-Span shows a member of Congress seeking approval to revise and extend his remarks he is saying that to get a true account of the what he said you ‘ll have to go to the video tape. I mean who knows what all those great Democratic Senators said during the debates in the ‘60s over the voting law?
#2 – If, as you say, I engage in argumentum ad hominen I can answer – shades of tu quoque – that Occupy Wall Street is a classic, straight from central casting, example of argumentum ad invidiam. If History is a guide, the coming – How to say this gracefully? – “unpleasantness” in Ferguson will be argumentum ad captandum to the nth degree. I like to use argumentum ad absurdum to make a point for the simple reason that a pie in the face tends to make a point – you guessed it – absurdly. The point, having been made that way, tends to stay made. Think of Swift’s recipe for boiling Irish babies.
#3 – Logical fallacies are eternal. They are immortal. They are the only thing that will outlive a Congressional committee. E.G. – I heard President Clinton give a press conference in the Rose Garden in August, 1998. I have been to DC in August. There are 2 types of weather there. A – Friggin’ hot and – B - unbelievably friggin’ hot. He then proceeded to tell us that it was hot because of Global Warming. He then told us that swelteringly hot August days give us, honest Injun, Global Warming. What leaps to mind – think of the Jetsons wearing 7 League boots – is what would modern American Liberals do without tautologies? Correlation is not causation. When feelings are conflated into ideas and then into public policy we are on a short route to chaos. I suggest res ipso loquitur would be an acceptable argumentum ad rem for a criticism of public poverty policies, particularly those of the last 50 years.
I look forward to Senator PrincessSummerFallWinterWarrren [D-MA] telling me that POST HOC ERGO PROPTER HOC has replaced “Happy Days Are here Again” as the official theme song of the Democratic Party. I mean, after all, how can anyone be “Happy” when the Koch Brothers are out and about despoiling the common weal?
Is it possible that the horizon can’t be reached because “stones are hard and water is wet”?
Modern American Liberals regularly and routinely dismiss empirical evidence, evidence that is as real as your boot, because it runs contra to their angelic expectations. Just because something doesn’t work doesn’t mean that it won’t work if enough well intentioned people work really, really hard to make it work. In the 1970s I was an expert witness on Federal Housing Authority financing. Can you find someone, anyone, anywhere who would voluntarily move into Section 8 housing? Send up a big flare when you do.
Godot will be arrested twice for loitering and for failure to give a good account of himself before the Summer of Recovery gets here. I guess you haven’t noticed.
KS
PS – You may want to brush up on a priori/a posteriori. Also, if the world is flat will the King’s command make it round? If it is indeed round can he make it flat? I am sure you heard of the unemployed teacher who, when asked his opinion on the subject, said he wasn’t sure, what with the science not being “settled”, but that he was prepared to teach either or both ways, depending on the syllabus.
“And having turned to the Government for bread, on the very first
sign of scarcity they will turn and bite the hand that feeds them.”
Robert Steinbach
The Sun Sentinel
Mr. Steinbach,
I am facing a dilemma.
The Great Reagan used to say that it was not so much that Liberals were stupid as it is it that there’s so much that they don’t know.
The obverse is that when I finished one of my Socratic tutorials Amy, my wife of late and happy memory, would say “That’s why people never ask us back”.
#1 – Wikipedia is a jumping off point. It is not a place of critical thinking. It is, however, a place where it can begin. The Congressional Record has similar status. When C-Span shows a member of Congress seeking approval to revise and extend his remarks he is saying that to get a true account of the what he said you ‘ll have to go to the video tape. I mean who knows what all those great Democratic Senators said during the debates in the ‘60s over the voting law?
#2 – If, as you say, I engage in argumentum ad hominen I can answer – shades of tu quoque – that Occupy Wall Street is a classic, straight from central casting, example of argumentum ad invidiam. If History is a guide, the coming – How to say this gracefully? – “unpleasantness” in Ferguson will be argumentum ad captandum to the nth degree. I like to use argumentum ad absurdum to make a point for the simple reason that a pie in the face tends to make a point – you guessed it – absurdly. The point, having been made that way, tends to stay made. Think of Swift’s recipe for boiling Irish babies.
#3 – Logical fallacies are eternal. They are immortal. They are the only thing that will outlive a Congressional committee. E.G. – I heard President Clinton give a press conference in the Rose Garden in August, 1998. I have been to DC in August. There are 2 types of weather there. A – Friggin’ hot and – B - unbelievably friggin’ hot. He then proceeded to tell us that it was hot because of Global Warming. He then told us that swelteringly hot August days give us, honest Injun, Global Warming. What leaps to mind – think of the Jetsons wearing 7 League boots – is what would modern American Liberals do without tautologies? Correlation is not causation. When feelings are conflated into ideas and then into public policy we are on a short route to chaos. I suggest res ipso loquitur would be an acceptable argumentum ad rem for a criticism of public poverty policies, particularly those of the last 50 years.
I look forward to Senator PrincessSummerFallWinterWarrren [D-MA] telling me that POST HOC ERGO PROPTER HOC has replaced “Happy Days Are here Again” as the official theme song of the Democratic Party. I mean, after all, how can anyone be “Happy” when the Koch Brothers are out and about despoiling the common weal?
Is it possible that the horizon can’t be reached because “stones are hard and water is wet”?
Modern American Liberals regularly and routinely dismiss empirical evidence, evidence that is as real as your boot, because it runs contra to their angelic expectations. Just because something doesn’t work doesn’t mean that it won’t work if enough well intentioned people work really, really hard to make it work. In the 1970s I was an expert witness on Federal Housing Authority financing. Can you find someone, anyone, anywhere who would voluntarily move into Section 8 housing? Send up a big flare when you do.
Godot will be arrested twice for loitering and for failure to give a good account of himself before the Summer of Recovery gets here. I guess you haven’t noticed.
KS
PS – You may want to brush up on a priori/a posteriori. Also, if the world is flat will the King’s command make it round? If it is indeed round can he make it flat? I am sure you heard of the unemployed teacher who, when asked his opinion on the subject, said he wasn’t sure, what with the science not being “settled”, but that he was prepared to teach either or both ways, depending on the syllabus.
“And having turned to the Government for bread, on the very first
sign of scarcity they will turn and bite the hand that feeds them.”
November 15, 2014
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Blvd
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: Liar, liar. Pants on fire. Or how to be a modern American Liberal
Mr. Berger,
“…we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes,
AND OUR SACRED HONOR.”
I find it fascinating that thousands of trial lawyers with thousands of court room hours – hopefully all billed and collected – have never been sworn in and asked questions by someone who is not asking them to forward their cause.
“…he shall take care that the laws be faithfully executed.”
When President B.O. twice took the oath of office he accepted the language of the Constitution. Correct me if I am wrong but didn’t he bill himself as a “Constitutional scholar”? As I read it there is no wiggle room for personal favorites. It says, in magnificent declarative sentences, that there are no exceptions. None.
You may recall – Forgive me for assuming that you have specific knowledge of American History, a knowledge that your public statements screams you do not - that Democratic President Andrew Jackson said, “John Marshall made the law. Let him enforce it”. In the end, possibly because he got tired of slaughtering Native Americans, he enforced it. Score one for the Constitution.
[As an aside, wouldn’t Logic dictate that if modern American Liberals have their knickers in a knot over the inherent racism of the name of the NFL team playing in Washington, they should burn all their $20 bills to show their solidarity with the displaced sons of Sagamore and Geronimo? I can come by next week and pick up your entire firm’s offending currency. I guarantee that I will destroy each one individually in an environmentally sensitive manner. Who says it doesn’t pay to go green?]
“A man up on oath holds his soul in his hands as if it was water.
HE OPENS THEM AT HIS PERIL.”
There is a case – Halbig v Burwell - currently on the docket of the Supreme Court of the United States. It is about ObamaCare. One of the questions to be decided is whether or not members of the Death Panels must be employees or can they be independent contractors. I understand that Professor Jonathan Gruber, the paradigmatic template for the serial lying on which modern American Liberalism is predicated, has filed an amicus curiae brief on behalf of usurpation of individual freedom, that is to say, in favor of the death grip called ObamaCare.
I am not an officer of the court. You are. Isn’t it incumbent on you to inform the Court that a scroyle of biblical proportions, a man who couldn’t lie straight in bed, is defiling its sacred chambers?
“At long last, sir, at long last,
HAVE YOU NO SENSE OF HONOR?”
Wait a minute.
Isn’t that where I came in?
“NOTHING LOST BUT HONOR”
Kevin Smith
“HONOR AND SHAME FROM NO CONDITION RISE.
ACT WELL YOUR PART; THERE ALL HONOR LIES.
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Blvd
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: Liar, liar. Pants on fire. Or how to be a modern American Liberal
Mr. Berger,
“…we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes,
AND OUR SACRED HONOR.”
I find it fascinating that thousands of trial lawyers with thousands of court room hours – hopefully all billed and collected – have never been sworn in and asked questions by someone who is not asking them to forward their cause.
“…he shall take care that the laws be faithfully executed.”
When President B.O. twice took the oath of office he accepted the language of the Constitution. Correct me if I am wrong but didn’t he bill himself as a “Constitutional scholar”? As I read it there is no wiggle room for personal favorites. It says, in magnificent declarative sentences, that there are no exceptions. None.
You may recall – Forgive me for assuming that you have specific knowledge of American History, a knowledge that your public statements screams you do not - that Democratic President Andrew Jackson said, “John Marshall made the law. Let him enforce it”. In the end, possibly because he got tired of slaughtering Native Americans, he enforced it. Score one for the Constitution.
[As an aside, wouldn’t Logic dictate that if modern American Liberals have their knickers in a knot over the inherent racism of the name of the NFL team playing in Washington, they should burn all their $20 bills to show their solidarity with the displaced sons of Sagamore and Geronimo? I can come by next week and pick up your entire firm’s offending currency. I guarantee that I will destroy each one individually in an environmentally sensitive manner. Who says it doesn’t pay to go green?]
“A man up on oath holds his soul in his hands as if it was water.
HE OPENS THEM AT HIS PERIL.”
There is a case – Halbig v Burwell - currently on the docket of the Supreme Court of the United States. It is about ObamaCare. One of the questions to be decided is whether or not members of the Death Panels must be employees or can they be independent contractors. I understand that Professor Jonathan Gruber, the paradigmatic template for the serial lying on which modern American Liberalism is predicated, has filed an amicus curiae brief on behalf of usurpation of individual freedom, that is to say, in favor of the death grip called ObamaCare.
I am not an officer of the court. You are. Isn’t it incumbent on you to inform the Court that a scroyle of biblical proportions, a man who couldn’t lie straight in bed, is defiling its sacred chambers?
“At long last, sir, at long last,
HAVE YOU NO SENSE OF HONOR?”
Wait a minute.
Isn’t that where I came in?
“NOTHING LOST BUT HONOR”
Kevin Smith
“HONOR AND SHAME FROM NO CONDITION RISE.
ACT WELL YOUR PART; THERE ALL HONOR LIES.
Thursday, November 13, 2014
November 12, 2014
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Blvd.
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: Congratulations and a non-denominational secularized Season’s Greetings to you.
Mr. Berger,
Being named modern American Liberal piñata of the year is no mean feat. That you did it in your first year of contention speaks volumes for your, doubtless, Kipling inspired dream seeking persistence.
The prize, a year’s supply of “non-malodorous fecal matter syndrome” in the delivery system of your choice – oral or anal – delivered as often as required in a plain brown envelope, may, in your case, be redundant. You seem to have access to an Old Faithful geyser that enables you to quaff deeply and daily of the most important elixir in the alternative universe occupied by gravity defying modern American Liberals. It enables you to possess the rare ability to ask, after you have pissed on somebody’s back, why they haven’t burst out in a chorus of “I’m Singing in the Rain”.
I could have picked Congresschick Debbie Wasserman-Schultz [D-FL] but she’s too busy trying to hang on to her job. Chances are she will since expectations, not results, are what counts for modern American Liberal scorekeepers.
II could have picked Senator Diane Feinstein [D-CA] who recently said “all veterans are a little bit nuts”. Honest. You could look it up. If I did that it would piss off Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi [D-CA] She is still mad at me for not giving her the attention she earned when she said in re Obamacare “We’ll have to pass it to see what’s in it”. Honest. She said that. You could look it up.
She was just picking up the Democratic torch that was first lighted in 1864 when George McClellan, the Democratic candidate for President, referred to Abraham Lincoln as a “baboon”
In 1916 President Wilson [D-NJ] said he would “never send American boys to fight in foreign wars”. That was so popular that President Roosevelt [D-NY] said it in 1940. No to be outdone, President Johnson, [D-TX], AKA “Landslide Lyndon”, a name decidedly not given to him by his trusted vote counter and recounter, Abe Fortas. Johnson also gave us the hugely popular War on Poverty
Some thought was given to Professor Gruber of MIT. He was paid almost $400,000 by the tax payers of America to advise the government on how to pass ObamaCare. After the checks cleared, his counsel was tersely spot on. He told the modern American Liberal cabal of rotters both in the White House, the Congress, and, most importantly, in the ass kissing media, to lie to the American people. He said that because he believed it. He believed it because, deep down in his modern American Liberal heart, he knows that the American people are “too stupid to know any better”. Honest. He said that. You could look it up.
Gaffes happen when people accidentally tell the truth. If there is one thing central to the core of true modern American Liberals is that the untermenschen - “bitter clingers” all – are too stupid to govern themselves. If they were smart they would know that raising taxes and the minimum wage is the one sure way to jump start the economy. And, since the Koo-Aid of this Fatal Conceit enables them to say even if it isn’t, it Damn well should be.
The next time these closet Fascists want to tell some whoppers call me. I’ll do it for a couple of hundred bucks and a case of Tullamore Dew. I’ll also need 60 pounds of Waygu Beef Tartare If you can’t get Waygu I’ll settle for Kobe. I’ll need that to reach out to my PETA pals. PETA pals? I have many pals who list themselves as “People Eating Tasty Animals”.
I picked you because you’re a local guy.
I don’t know why your firm hasn’t announced that it will no longer handle any real estate transactions involving water front property. You alerted us to the seas rising inexorably due to Global Warming [I guess when Candidate Obama promised to “cool the planet and calm the oceans” he hadn’t figured on the Tea Party and the Koch Brothers. Is that promise still “operative”?] I know by now – I hope, I hope – that in addition to mandating that your associates use hybrid public transportation to get to and from work you have turned off all the A/Cs in your office.
If you have not done so it would make you a lower than eel shit hypocritical bastard. The uptick is that it will make you this year’s first winner of another much coveted award. I hereby name you
SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR
But I have another reason for picking you
You entered the 10 ring when you and your wife hosted - I am incapable of making this up, it being quite past the parameters of my ken – a vegan dinner for her classmate, gazillionaire hedge fund manager Tom Steyer. He, having gotten his pelf and swag the old-fashioned way, that is to say, by mining and selling dirty coal to emerging nations who burned it to make electricity to lift them from the depths of Socialism, has found the Baby Jesus. He is a lot like an aging hooker whose siren’s call is losing its allure.
[I would be remiss if I failed to point out that Hitler was the 20th century’s first great vegan. I could use the “correlation is causation” warped Logic used by Sophist mountebanks who preach the false gospel of man caused climate change and hint that your wife is a goose stepping, brown shirted, Todt Juden, SS Death’s Head Ladies Auxiliary Frau Oberst but I won’t.
The other reason I chose you is because Ft. Lauderdale has an image problem.
A 90 year old veteran – Remember what Senator Feinstein said about them? –wants to feed the homeless. The problem is that it is against the law. Gandhi used to tell the Judges presiding over his trials that they had no choice but to sentence him to jail. History would suggest that this will end with an enthusiastic policeman Macing him, Tazing him, and, for good measure, “putting the boot in” a few times.
Not good. Not good at all. Shades of Spring Break! Think what it will do the LGBTQ market that the city is soliciting. Not good.
Herewith a potential solution.
Jack Seiler, Mayor of Ft. Lauderdale, and soon to be this century’s first Bull Connor [Connor was a delegate to the 1964 Democratic Convention in 1964. Look it up] was a guest at your home for the Tom Steyer magic lantern show cum vegan meal
Why not have a dozen non-gas powered hybrid buses on hand the next time he rings the dinner bell.
Load the buses and bring them all to your house
Chilled pine nut and kudzu soup, kale soufflé laced with dandelions, and finished off with your wife’s legendary endive and arugula sorbet with either white or black shaved truffle. The homeless feeding problem will be solved.
I have spoken - unofficially and deep throat back channel – to the Mayor. He nodded so violently he threw his back out.
I hear people criticizing the 1% because in addition to being undertaxed they never “give something back”.
Here’s your chance.
Your wife can have Wagner playing in the background.
Kevin Smith
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Blvd.
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: Congratulations and a non-denominational secularized Season’s Greetings to you.
Mr. Berger,
Being named modern American Liberal piñata of the year is no mean feat. That you did it in your first year of contention speaks volumes for your, doubtless, Kipling inspired dream seeking persistence.
The prize, a year’s supply of “non-malodorous fecal matter syndrome” in the delivery system of your choice – oral or anal – delivered as often as required in a plain brown envelope, may, in your case, be redundant. You seem to have access to an Old Faithful geyser that enables you to quaff deeply and daily of the most important elixir in the alternative universe occupied by gravity defying modern American Liberals. It enables you to possess the rare ability to ask, after you have pissed on somebody’s back, why they haven’t burst out in a chorus of “I’m Singing in the Rain”.
I could have picked Congresschick Debbie Wasserman-Schultz [D-FL] but she’s too busy trying to hang on to her job. Chances are she will since expectations, not results, are what counts for modern American Liberal scorekeepers.
II could have picked Senator Diane Feinstein [D-CA] who recently said “all veterans are a little bit nuts”. Honest. You could look it up. If I did that it would piss off Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi [D-CA] She is still mad at me for not giving her the attention she earned when she said in re Obamacare “We’ll have to pass it to see what’s in it”. Honest. She said that. You could look it up.
She was just picking up the Democratic torch that was first lighted in 1864 when George McClellan, the Democratic candidate for President, referred to Abraham Lincoln as a “baboon”
In 1916 President Wilson [D-NJ] said he would “never send American boys to fight in foreign wars”. That was so popular that President Roosevelt [D-NY] said it in 1940. No to be outdone, President Johnson, [D-TX], AKA “Landslide Lyndon”, a name decidedly not given to him by his trusted vote counter and recounter, Abe Fortas. Johnson also gave us the hugely popular War on Poverty
Some thought was given to Professor Gruber of MIT. He was paid almost $400,000 by the tax payers of America to advise the government on how to pass ObamaCare. After the checks cleared, his counsel was tersely spot on. He told the modern American Liberal cabal of rotters both in the White House, the Congress, and, most importantly, in the ass kissing media, to lie to the American people. He said that because he believed it. He believed it because, deep down in his modern American Liberal heart, he knows that the American people are “too stupid to know any better”. Honest. He said that. You could look it up.
Gaffes happen when people accidentally tell the truth. If there is one thing central to the core of true modern American Liberals is that the untermenschen - “bitter clingers” all – are too stupid to govern themselves. If they were smart they would know that raising taxes and the minimum wage is the one sure way to jump start the economy. And, since the Koo-Aid of this Fatal Conceit enables them to say even if it isn’t, it Damn well should be.
The next time these closet Fascists want to tell some whoppers call me. I’ll do it for a couple of hundred bucks and a case of Tullamore Dew. I’ll also need 60 pounds of Waygu Beef Tartare If you can’t get Waygu I’ll settle for Kobe. I’ll need that to reach out to my PETA pals. PETA pals? I have many pals who list themselves as “People Eating Tasty Animals”.
I picked you because you’re a local guy.
I don’t know why your firm hasn’t announced that it will no longer handle any real estate transactions involving water front property. You alerted us to the seas rising inexorably due to Global Warming [I guess when Candidate Obama promised to “cool the planet and calm the oceans” he hadn’t figured on the Tea Party and the Koch Brothers. Is that promise still “operative”?] I know by now – I hope, I hope – that in addition to mandating that your associates use hybrid public transportation to get to and from work you have turned off all the A/Cs in your office.
If you have not done so it would make you a lower than eel shit hypocritical bastard. The uptick is that it will make you this year’s first winner of another much coveted award. I hereby name you
SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR
But I have another reason for picking you
You entered the 10 ring when you and your wife hosted - I am incapable of making this up, it being quite past the parameters of my ken – a vegan dinner for her classmate, gazillionaire hedge fund manager Tom Steyer. He, having gotten his pelf and swag the old-fashioned way, that is to say, by mining and selling dirty coal to emerging nations who burned it to make electricity to lift them from the depths of Socialism, has found the Baby Jesus. He is a lot like an aging hooker whose siren’s call is losing its allure.
[I would be remiss if I failed to point out that Hitler was the 20th century’s first great vegan. I could use the “correlation is causation” warped Logic used by Sophist mountebanks who preach the false gospel of man caused climate change and hint that your wife is a goose stepping, brown shirted, Todt Juden, SS Death’s Head Ladies Auxiliary Frau Oberst but I won’t.
The other reason I chose you is because Ft. Lauderdale has an image problem.
A 90 year old veteran – Remember what Senator Feinstein said about them? –wants to feed the homeless. The problem is that it is against the law. Gandhi used to tell the Judges presiding over his trials that they had no choice but to sentence him to jail. History would suggest that this will end with an enthusiastic policeman Macing him, Tazing him, and, for good measure, “putting the boot in” a few times.
Not good. Not good at all. Shades of Spring Break! Think what it will do the LGBTQ market that the city is soliciting. Not good.
Herewith a potential solution.
Jack Seiler, Mayor of Ft. Lauderdale, and soon to be this century’s first Bull Connor [Connor was a delegate to the 1964 Democratic Convention in 1964. Look it up] was a guest at your home for the Tom Steyer magic lantern show cum vegan meal
Why not have a dozen non-gas powered hybrid buses on hand the next time he rings the dinner bell.
Load the buses and bring them all to your house
Chilled pine nut and kudzu soup, kale soufflé laced with dandelions, and finished off with your wife’s legendary endive and arugula sorbet with either white or black shaved truffle. The homeless feeding problem will be solved.
I have spoken - unofficially and deep throat back channel – to the Mayor. He nodded so violently he threw his back out.
I hear people criticizing the 1% because in addition to being undertaxed they never “give something back”.
Here’s your chance.
Your wife can have Wagner playing in the background.
Kevin Smith
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
November 7, 201
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Boulevard
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: “… a dish best eaten cold” – Some comments on a few tumescently rich upcoming moments in the United States Senate.
Mr. Berger,
One of the joys of reading the Constitution – the one from Philadelphia in 1787 – as a non-lawyer is that there is no need to find a peripatetic penumbra or an ethereal emanation on which to hang a brief on for the latest appeal of Jarndyce v Jarndyce.
I wrote that I heard President B. O. and may I say that he is the best President that we have say that 5 states had approved increases in the minimum wage. As usual, his cavalier treatment of facts, particularly the inconvenient ones, was, as Bob Uecker says, “just a bit outside”. It was 4 states but “Come on, dude”, it’s close enough for government work, right? Besides, didn’t he tell us that there were “57 or 58 states”?
It’s a reason to cheer.
All hail James Madison and George Mason!
You may wish to consult the above-mentioned Constitution. For you, as a card carrying, fire breathing modern American Liberal, a type of individual whose favorite color is plaid, it may well be the first time. Pay particular attention to the Ninth Amendment. Then try to gulp the 10th. Admittedly they will be a tough swallow for people who regard the Constitution as a roadblock on the path to social justice, receding sea levels, and gluten free tofu farms. The thought of enumerated powers, thus powers that are precisely defined and limited, must be like finger nails on the black board, for which I add a jubilant Deo Gratias.
I have some bad news for you on the dead polar bear front.
Senator James Inhofe will be the next Chairman of the Senate committee in charge of finding the Bermuda Triangle, capturing Big Foot, and determining whether or not Atlantis is where the Loch Ness monsters go to breed.
All hail the triumphant return of the scientific method, of critical thinking, perhaps even reasoned discourse.
In addition to taking the regular oath required of testifying expert witnesses they will have to supply short essays on why correlation is not causation and why the words science and consensus must never be allowed to appear in the same sentence.
STOP THE PRESSES!
I have irrefutable empirical evidence of climate change from a confidential source on Bruce Avenue in Edina, MN. The Zip code is 55424
A quick pre-dawn glance out the window revealed that it was snowing. That this phenomenon was caused by gas-guzzling SUVs, the increasingly prolific use of plastic, the deadly cabal of the Koch Brothers and Wal-Mart that was spawned in the American heartland when no one was looking to become a coven of warlocks dedicated to the destruction by petrocarbons of the idyllic life dreamed of by wingnut moonbat ohmadahns who believe that tofu and range free kale will cure teenage bullying and obesity, there can be no doubt. I will keep you posted about this anomaly. Imagine! Snow in Minnesota. What have we done to our planet? Dies irae…de profundis…where is former Vice President Alpha Gump when we really need him? The short hand for the above is how about a more equitable distribution of seasonally adjusted Global Warming.
BACK TO REGULAR PROGRAMMING
When the first session of the Judiciary Committee of the new Senate convenes there will be a spectre hanging over it. It will be time to put paid on the bill owed to Robert Bork. Let me add Clement Haynesworth, Clarence Thomas, and Charles Pickering to the pay back list. If Senator Lard Kennedy can conduct himself as a meaner than cat shit toss pot so can the farmer from Iowa.
I can’t wait for the venom and vitriol to drip voluminously from the next judicial nominee who thinks that the Constitution should be updated every year, just like the LL Bean catalog.
I end with a personal plea. I started a PAC with the fetching name of
DEMS!
DON’T DUMP DEBBIE
I am surrounded by too many women with whom I share much DNA to ever suggest that I would “give her the back of my hand”. Also, I wouldn’t “drag her by the hair” for fear that I would cut my hands. She ain’t called MS Medusa for nothing.
Whom would you replace her with?
The Witch from the Wizard of OZ is retired.
The harlequin bruja from the Disney Dalmatian movie is tied up in sequels.
Bella Abzug is still dead.
You may as well keep Little Debbie.
Besides, I would have to make more environmentally insensitive t-shirts while disposing of the ones with her mug on them in a way that would increase my carbon footprint exponentially.
Kevin Smith
PS – One more thing of a personal nature. President B.O. told me I would save $200 a month once Obamacare was up and running. It is; I am not; it is costing me more. The facts, those damned inconvenient things that modern American Liberal treat as dog dirt, would support the interpretation that he is rotten, low down, stinking liar. It you were to send me a $50 pre-paid Visa card I would conveniently forget those lies. Honest.
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Boulevard
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: “… a dish best eaten cold” – Some comments on a few tumescently rich upcoming moments in the United States Senate.
Mr. Berger,
One of the joys of reading the Constitution – the one from Philadelphia in 1787 – as a non-lawyer is that there is no need to find a peripatetic penumbra or an ethereal emanation on which to hang a brief on for the latest appeal of Jarndyce v Jarndyce.
I wrote that I heard President B. O. and may I say that he is the best President that we have say that 5 states had approved increases in the minimum wage. As usual, his cavalier treatment of facts, particularly the inconvenient ones, was, as Bob Uecker says, “just a bit outside”. It was 4 states but “Come on, dude”, it’s close enough for government work, right? Besides, didn’t he tell us that there were “57 or 58 states”?
It’s a reason to cheer.
All hail James Madison and George Mason!
You may wish to consult the above-mentioned Constitution. For you, as a card carrying, fire breathing modern American Liberal, a type of individual whose favorite color is plaid, it may well be the first time. Pay particular attention to the Ninth Amendment. Then try to gulp the 10th. Admittedly they will be a tough swallow for people who regard the Constitution as a roadblock on the path to social justice, receding sea levels, and gluten free tofu farms. The thought of enumerated powers, thus powers that are precisely defined and limited, must be like finger nails on the black board, for which I add a jubilant Deo Gratias.
I have some bad news for you on the dead polar bear front.
Senator James Inhofe will be the next Chairman of the Senate committee in charge of finding the Bermuda Triangle, capturing Big Foot, and determining whether or not Atlantis is where the Loch Ness monsters go to breed.
All hail the triumphant return of the scientific method, of critical thinking, perhaps even reasoned discourse.
In addition to taking the regular oath required of testifying expert witnesses they will have to supply short essays on why correlation is not causation and why the words science and consensus must never be allowed to appear in the same sentence.
STOP THE PRESSES!
I have irrefutable empirical evidence of climate change from a confidential source on Bruce Avenue in Edina, MN. The Zip code is 55424
A quick pre-dawn glance out the window revealed that it was snowing. That this phenomenon was caused by gas-guzzling SUVs, the increasingly prolific use of plastic, the deadly cabal of the Koch Brothers and Wal-Mart that was spawned in the American heartland when no one was looking to become a coven of warlocks dedicated to the destruction by petrocarbons of the idyllic life dreamed of by wingnut moonbat ohmadahns who believe that tofu and range free kale will cure teenage bullying and obesity, there can be no doubt. I will keep you posted about this anomaly. Imagine! Snow in Minnesota. What have we done to our planet? Dies irae…de profundis…where is former Vice President Alpha Gump when we really need him? The short hand for the above is how about a more equitable distribution of seasonally adjusted Global Warming.
BACK TO REGULAR PROGRAMMING
When the first session of the Judiciary Committee of the new Senate convenes there will be a spectre hanging over it. It will be time to put paid on the bill owed to Robert Bork. Let me add Clement Haynesworth, Clarence Thomas, and Charles Pickering to the pay back list. If Senator Lard Kennedy can conduct himself as a meaner than cat shit toss pot so can the farmer from Iowa.
I can’t wait for the venom and vitriol to drip voluminously from the next judicial nominee who thinks that the Constitution should be updated every year, just like the LL Bean catalog.
I end with a personal plea. I started a PAC with the fetching name of
DEMS!
DON’T DUMP DEBBIE
I am surrounded by too many women with whom I share much DNA to ever suggest that I would “give her the back of my hand”. Also, I wouldn’t “drag her by the hair” for fear that I would cut my hands. She ain’t called MS Medusa for nothing.
Whom would you replace her with?
The Witch from the Wizard of OZ is retired.
The harlequin bruja from the Disney Dalmatian movie is tied up in sequels.
Bella Abzug is still dead.
You may as well keep Little Debbie.
Besides, I would have to make more environmentally insensitive t-shirts while disposing of the ones with her mug on them in a way that would increase my carbon footprint exponentially.
Kevin Smith
PS – One more thing of a personal nature. President B.O. told me I would save $200 a month once Obamacare was up and running. It is; I am not; it is costing me more. The facts, those damned inconvenient things that modern American Liberal treat as dog dirt, would support the interpretation that he is rotten, low down, stinking liar. It you were to send me a $50 pre-paid Visa card I would conveniently forget those lies. Honest.
November 10, 2014
Congresswoman Debbie Debbie Wasserman Shultz
Pembroke Pines, FL
RE: An apology…of sorts
Dearest Darling Debbie,
When I’m wrong, I’m wrong.
For this I apologize, not in the traditional modern American Liberal way “I’m sorry if what I said offended you” but, rather, because what I said and wrote was wrong. Further, there was information that would have mitigated the really dumb and nasty things you have said. If I had known I would have used a different tone, one perhaps with a tinge of sympathy for all that you have gone through, for all that you have had to endure.
I can imagine gut wrenching feeling of betrayal, of outrage, of gender based shock when you found out that you were only being paid 77% of what male members of Congress were paid. I can imagine the flagrant abusion when you found out that for every dollar that Congressman Alcee Hastings earned you only earned 77%. Hastings, you may recall, had his Black robed felonious ass impeached and tossed off the Federal bench. I’m not even sure if this ex-con can vote. Then, in a cavalier manner predicated on majority guilt a special district was created for him to run for Congress. It would have sent Willie Horton, Step-n-Fetchit, or OJ Simpson to Congress.
Every time the eagle lands, that’s real world lingo, a place and tongue of which modern American Liberals are clueless, for pay day. It must make you feel worse than if you were handcuffed to a canoe with Rush Limbaugh with the only paddle and his favorite mink glove ready to examine you for ticks. “This cur makes 30% more than I do: would drive me nuts too.
Anyway I am sorry for picking on you, for making fun of you, for not being sensitive to the gender issue that causes 24 hour, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year, permanently screeching over the top PMS.
Coca Cola, both regular and diet and M&Ms, both plain and peanut have proved to be of help. As always, consult with your certified ObamaCare medicine man.
Kevin Smith
Congresswoman Debbie Debbie Wasserman Shultz
Pembroke Pines, FL
RE: An apology…of sorts
Dearest Darling Debbie,
When I’m wrong, I’m wrong.
For this I apologize, not in the traditional modern American Liberal way “I’m sorry if what I said offended you” but, rather, because what I said and wrote was wrong. Further, there was information that would have mitigated the really dumb and nasty things you have said. If I had known I would have used a different tone, one perhaps with a tinge of sympathy for all that you have gone through, for all that you have had to endure.
I can imagine gut wrenching feeling of betrayal, of outrage, of gender based shock when you found out that you were only being paid 77% of what male members of Congress were paid. I can imagine the flagrant abusion when you found out that for every dollar that Congressman Alcee Hastings earned you only earned 77%. Hastings, you may recall, had his Black robed felonious ass impeached and tossed off the Federal bench. I’m not even sure if this ex-con can vote. Then, in a cavalier manner predicated on majority guilt a special district was created for him to run for Congress. It would have sent Willie Horton, Step-n-Fetchit, or OJ Simpson to Congress.
Every time the eagle lands, that’s real world lingo, a place and tongue of which modern American Liberals are clueless, for pay day. It must make you feel worse than if you were handcuffed to a canoe with Rush Limbaugh with the only paddle and his favorite mink glove ready to examine you for ticks. “This cur makes 30% more than I do: would drive me nuts too.
Anyway I am sorry for picking on you, for making fun of you, for not being sensitive to the gender issue that causes 24 hour, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year, permanently screeching over the top PMS.
Coca Cola, both regular and diet and M&Ms, both plain and peanut have proved to be of help. As always, consult with your certified ObamaCare medicine man.
Kevin Smith
Sunday, November 9, 2014
November 2, 2014
Joy-Ann Reid
The Miami Herald
3511 NW 91st Avenue
Miami, FL 33172
RE: Obama Agonistes– Some comments on your alas and alack but why are “they” throwing stones at “him” column on Halloween in the Miami Herald.
Ms. Reid,
A device, used by people who know the parameters of Rhetoric, to refocus the conversation, is known as “denying the major premise”.
Without exception, none seen, none unseen, modern American Liberals explain the ordure surrounding the clusterflubbed Obama administration as being caused by the Devil, or, worse, the Koch Brothers, the Tea Party, Wal-Mart, some combination of Rush Limbaugh, the NRA, Fox News, and former Democrats turned racist, rascally, rat bastard Republicans.
Here is an alternative explanation.
I’ll combine Dickens and Johnson – Samuel, not Lyndon
“The man is a ass and that’s an end to it”
Jesse Jackson said, just before announcing in front of 5,000,000 witnesses, that he “wanted to cut Obama’s nuts off” and that “the only thing he ever run was his mouth”.
[As an aside, and forgive me for plucking low hanging fruit, but what would have happened in the universe of POO – Perpetually Offended and Outraged – modern American Liberals if that had been said by – pick one or pick all – any White cleric, rabbi, or imam, Mike Huckabee, Sarah Palin, John Boehner, the ghost of Charlton Heston, any Global Warming heretic, inter alia?]
Why Black Americans don’t vote in mid-terms and why there is a never ending appeal to racial identity and self-interest which never seems to succeed thus guaranteeing continued employment to registration hustlers, AKA political activists, is beyond me. I am, to slightly paraphrase the New York Times, a “white non-Hispanic” who has never missed an election, be they national, state, or local.
I had to use a photo-id twice today – 10/31. Is that proof of racism per se?
Why does President B.O. think that making rich people poorer will make poor people richer? [Let me add Senator Princess SummerFallWinterWarrren and Grammy Clinton to that list of boobs, jackasses, mountebanks, and scroyles.]
The only possible explanation is that intellectually disabled modern American Liberals, and I quickly add that there are no other known types, believe that there is a lock box hidden away somewhere in the Bermuda Triangle and fanatically guarded by knuckle dragging Tea Party goons that contains all the wealth that ever was or ever will be “created”.
Laying aside all other things, modern American Liberals believe that they have been anointed by a diverse secular pantheon to see that the contents of said box are distributed more “fairly”, particularly to those who are “unlucky in life’s lottery”.
Pray tell but why, six years into the glorious reign of Obama the First, has the horizon not only not been reached but still sits out there mocking those who believed that hope and change could undo the laws governing gravity? Why are Happy Days still not here? Tell me again how raising taxes and the minimum wage will get us to the Land of Milk and Honey. If raising the minimum wage to $10.10 is good wouldn’t raising it to $21.10 be better? Why not $31.10? At that rate the “single moms, usually women of color”, will have chance to fart through silk like the rich White folk do?
Imagine a man standing in a bucket. Imagine a man standing in a bucket trying to pick it and him up by lifting its handle. Imagine trying to tax yourself to prosperity. The next time it works it will be the first.
Honest. Look it up.
Other than the lower case fascists who curry favor in the Oval Office in hope of advancing their shareholders’ interest – How do you think the Bismarck and Treblinka got built? – he has had no contact with what is still known as “the real world”.
The only economic achievement of his life, other than getting other people to pay for 11 years of tuition, room, and board for him, was getting his wife a $4,000 a week raise. Let me repeat that. He got his wife a $4,000 a week raise. In a story that endears the rest of the country to how Cook County operates she was in charge of sensitivity training for the mid-day, low fat culinary providers at the University of Chicago Hospital. Within hours of him being sworn into the United States Senate he got her employer a $1,000,000 earmark. By the time her next paycheck was printed her pay scale had jumped by $4,000 a week. Absurd as it may have been it was business as usual in Chicago. Her job was so important that since she left it to go live rent free in public housing in Washington it has remained vacant.
You end by saying that Republicans “controlling the mechanisms of voting” is bad and presumptively racist.
Thank God for Google
Take a peek at “Landslide Lyndon”, his pal Abe Fortas, Duvall County, TX, and its resident Duke, and how all those absentee ballots not only suddenly appeared but they suddenly appeared in alphabetical order so as to make the recount easier. Memories are fading but it all happened in 1948 and there wasn’t a Republican anywhere near the scene of the crime.
Take a peek at the Democratic Presidential primary in West Virginia in 1960. That’s the one where Joe Kennedy, AKA Poppa Doc, told his votaries to buy a win, not a landslide. Hubert Humphrey is still trying to get the number of the truck that hit him.
Take a peek at the Chicago recount in November, 1960. The City Hall gang counted and counted and kept counting until they got enough votes counted to overcome the down state Republican vote.
I am from Hudson County, NJ. I had an uncle who was such a devout Democrat that he did not let death interfere with his election-day duty. Even though he died in 1956 he voted until 1971. That’s why people will die to get to get to this country.
As to which party is best for which particular group it may be wise to consult Oliver Cromwell. Cromwell, a man who carried political correctness to its logical conclusion, would snarl at Parliament, “I beseech you in the bowels of Christ to consider that you may be wrong”.
Please tell me of one social program that worked, “worked” being defined as the problem was noted, the solution was devised and implemented, and the problem was solved, since the War on Poverty was declared?
It strikes me as passing strange and offensive to Logic that modern American Liberals take a bilge-laden gimcrack 2 legged stool that has been labeled as being “for the children” and judge it solely on its intentions while secretly knowing and hoping that no one else notices that the damn thing could never work. Vide the never ending Summer of Recovery and, lest we forget, Cash for Clunkers.
Modern American Liberals rely on the votes of groups who have forgotten everything while learning nothing. Perhaps it’s time for these groups to stop eating their own feet. Perhaps it’s time for something different.
How much worse could it be?
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
PS – I voted for Lyndon Johnson in 1964. I believed that if I didn’t we would wind up with 2,000,000 men in Vietnam and a wall with 58,839 names of dead GIs on it. Also, America would have never ending race riots. It was Burke who said “Experience is the only school where some people can learn”. As much as he liked America he never lived here.
Joy-Ann Reid
The Miami Herald
3511 NW 91st Avenue
Miami, FL 33172
RE: Obama Agonistes– Some comments on your alas and alack but why are “they” throwing stones at “him” column on Halloween in the Miami Herald.
Ms. Reid,
A device, used by people who know the parameters of Rhetoric, to refocus the conversation, is known as “denying the major premise”.
Without exception, none seen, none unseen, modern American Liberals explain the ordure surrounding the clusterflubbed Obama administration as being caused by the Devil, or, worse, the Koch Brothers, the Tea Party, Wal-Mart, some combination of Rush Limbaugh, the NRA, Fox News, and former Democrats turned racist, rascally, rat bastard Republicans.
Here is an alternative explanation.
I’ll combine Dickens and Johnson – Samuel, not Lyndon
“The man is a ass and that’s an end to it”
Jesse Jackson said, just before announcing in front of 5,000,000 witnesses, that he “wanted to cut Obama’s nuts off” and that “the only thing he ever run was his mouth”.
[As an aside, and forgive me for plucking low hanging fruit, but what would have happened in the universe of POO – Perpetually Offended and Outraged – modern American Liberals if that had been said by – pick one or pick all – any White cleric, rabbi, or imam, Mike Huckabee, Sarah Palin, John Boehner, the ghost of Charlton Heston, any Global Warming heretic, inter alia?]
Why Black Americans don’t vote in mid-terms and why there is a never ending appeal to racial identity and self-interest which never seems to succeed thus guaranteeing continued employment to registration hustlers, AKA political activists, is beyond me. I am, to slightly paraphrase the New York Times, a “white non-Hispanic” who has never missed an election, be they national, state, or local.
I had to use a photo-id twice today – 10/31. Is that proof of racism per se?
Why does President B.O. think that making rich people poorer will make poor people richer? [Let me add Senator Princess SummerFallWinterWarrren and Grammy Clinton to that list of boobs, jackasses, mountebanks, and scroyles.]
The only possible explanation is that intellectually disabled modern American Liberals, and I quickly add that there are no other known types, believe that there is a lock box hidden away somewhere in the Bermuda Triangle and fanatically guarded by knuckle dragging Tea Party goons that contains all the wealth that ever was or ever will be “created”.
Laying aside all other things, modern American Liberals believe that they have been anointed by a diverse secular pantheon to see that the contents of said box are distributed more “fairly”, particularly to those who are “unlucky in life’s lottery”.
Pray tell but why, six years into the glorious reign of Obama the First, has the horizon not only not been reached but still sits out there mocking those who believed that hope and change could undo the laws governing gravity? Why are Happy Days still not here? Tell me again how raising taxes and the minimum wage will get us to the Land of Milk and Honey. If raising the minimum wage to $10.10 is good wouldn’t raising it to $21.10 be better? Why not $31.10? At that rate the “single moms, usually women of color”, will have chance to fart through silk like the rich White folk do?
Imagine a man standing in a bucket. Imagine a man standing in a bucket trying to pick it and him up by lifting its handle. Imagine trying to tax yourself to prosperity. The next time it works it will be the first.
Honest. Look it up.
Other than the lower case fascists who curry favor in the Oval Office in hope of advancing their shareholders’ interest – How do you think the Bismarck and Treblinka got built? – he has had no contact with what is still known as “the real world”.
The only economic achievement of his life, other than getting other people to pay for 11 years of tuition, room, and board for him, was getting his wife a $4,000 a week raise. Let me repeat that. He got his wife a $4,000 a week raise. In a story that endears the rest of the country to how Cook County operates she was in charge of sensitivity training for the mid-day, low fat culinary providers at the University of Chicago Hospital. Within hours of him being sworn into the United States Senate he got her employer a $1,000,000 earmark. By the time her next paycheck was printed her pay scale had jumped by $4,000 a week. Absurd as it may have been it was business as usual in Chicago. Her job was so important that since she left it to go live rent free in public housing in Washington it has remained vacant.
You end by saying that Republicans “controlling the mechanisms of voting” is bad and presumptively racist.
Thank God for Google
Take a peek at “Landslide Lyndon”, his pal Abe Fortas, Duvall County, TX, and its resident Duke, and how all those absentee ballots not only suddenly appeared but they suddenly appeared in alphabetical order so as to make the recount easier. Memories are fading but it all happened in 1948 and there wasn’t a Republican anywhere near the scene of the crime.
Take a peek at the Democratic Presidential primary in West Virginia in 1960. That’s the one where Joe Kennedy, AKA Poppa Doc, told his votaries to buy a win, not a landslide. Hubert Humphrey is still trying to get the number of the truck that hit him.
Take a peek at the Chicago recount in November, 1960. The City Hall gang counted and counted and kept counting until they got enough votes counted to overcome the down state Republican vote.
I am from Hudson County, NJ. I had an uncle who was such a devout Democrat that he did not let death interfere with his election-day duty. Even though he died in 1956 he voted until 1971. That’s why people will die to get to get to this country.
As to which party is best for which particular group it may be wise to consult Oliver Cromwell. Cromwell, a man who carried political correctness to its logical conclusion, would snarl at Parliament, “I beseech you in the bowels of Christ to consider that you may be wrong”.
Please tell me of one social program that worked, “worked” being defined as the problem was noted, the solution was devised and implemented, and the problem was solved, since the War on Poverty was declared?
It strikes me as passing strange and offensive to Logic that modern American Liberals take a bilge-laden gimcrack 2 legged stool that has been labeled as being “for the children” and judge it solely on its intentions while secretly knowing and hoping that no one else notices that the damn thing could never work. Vide the never ending Summer of Recovery and, lest we forget, Cash for Clunkers.
Modern American Liberals rely on the votes of groups who have forgotten everything while learning nothing. Perhaps it’s time for these groups to stop eating their own feet. Perhaps it’s time for something different.
How much worse could it be?
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
PS – I voted for Lyndon Johnson in 1964. I believed that if I didn’t we would wind up with 2,000,000 men in Vietnam and a wall with 58,839 names of dead GIs on it. Also, America would have never ending race riots. It was Burke who said “Experience is the only school where some people can learn”. As much as he liked America he never lived here.
November 6, 2014
Michael Mayo
The Sun Sentinel
RE: “For the children” – Shibboleths raised to an art form – some comments on your opinion piece - Winners and Losers – in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel.
Mr. Mayo,
I am opposed to any and all public bind issues because they are in open violation of Federal law. I would back a bus up to the Board of Education and fill it with several dozen “alleged perpetrators” for immediate arraignment before the nearest Federal magistrate.
After them, a convoy of buses for the lawyers, the bankers, and the brokers who advance, perpetrate, aid, and abet this fraud
Further, you say that more money for schools is “good for kids”.
Following your premise to its Logical conclusion, a simple step that is alien to practicing modern American Liberals, public education in Washington, DC should be the best in America, indeed in the known universe. Depending on which flexible accounting method is used, similar to Social Security, expenditures are ca. $35,000 per pupil.
Forget about National Merit Scholars and Ivy League recruiters bribing their way into the senior lunch room the place should be spinning out a few Noble Prize winners each year.
My question is simple.
Since public education in D.C. meets or exceeds all modern American Liberal hopes and expectations why aren’t all the President’s daughters in public school?
Get back to me please. After all, it’s for the children.
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
Michael Mayo
The Sun Sentinel
RE: “For the children” – Shibboleths raised to an art form – some comments on your opinion piece - Winners and Losers – in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel.
Mr. Mayo,
I am opposed to any and all public bind issues because they are in open violation of Federal law. I would back a bus up to the Board of Education and fill it with several dozen “alleged perpetrators” for immediate arraignment before the nearest Federal magistrate.
After them, a convoy of buses for the lawyers, the bankers, and the brokers who advance, perpetrate, aid, and abet this fraud
Further, you say that more money for schools is “good for kids”.
Following your premise to its Logical conclusion, a simple step that is alien to practicing modern American Liberals, public education in Washington, DC should be the best in America, indeed in the known universe. Depending on which flexible accounting method is used, similar to Social Security, expenditures are ca. $35,000 per pupil.
Forget about National Merit Scholars and Ivy League recruiters bribing their way into the senior lunch room the place should be spinning out a few Noble Prize winners each year.
My question is simple.
Since public education in D.C. meets or exceeds all modern American Liberal hopes and expectations why aren’t all the President’s daughters in public school?
Get back to me please. After all, it’s for the children.
Kevin Smith
WARRIORBARDIT@BELLSOUTH.NET
November 5, 2014
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Boulevard
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: Enough with the weather
Mr. Berger,
I am listening to President Obama say that 5 states with minimum wage increases on the ballot approved them.
I shan’t bother you with the story of Initiative and Referendum in this country. More than a century ago it was a favorite of the Progressive movement. The double helix, the DNA, the warp and the woof of modern American Liberalism, is a straight line from when Woodrow Wilson ran for Governor of New Jersey. I can’t mention Wilson without recalling that Justice Marshall called him the most bigoted and the most racist President of the 20th century. Specifically, bigoted toward Jews and racist to what were then called Colored people.
President Obama says the vox populi on the minimum wage from 5 states can be used as proof of the soundness of the proposal and why it should be become the law. It is interesting to note that wherever same sex marriage has appeared on a ballot, including Florida and California, it has been overwhelmingly defeated.
Who gets to pick which vox populi is the good one, the one that all modern American Liberals can eclectically support? Would not Logic dictate, and here you can fill in the blanks, that the goose and the gander should sip from the same trough?
I know that mALs have 24 hour chiropractors on speed dial. 4 sided triangles, squared circles, political flummery with all its attendant reversals and soul emptying sellouts are Hell on the vertebrae, both lumbar and thoracic.
I appeal to you in a sort of local hands across the aisle for you to tell me how the ukases and fiats that modern American Liberalism imposes on its votaries are assembled and then dissembled and, when their usefulness is gone, how they get sent down the memory hole.
Hope to hear from you before it gets warm[er] again.
Kevin Smith
Mitchell Berger, Esq.
350 E. Las Olas Boulevard
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: Enough with the weather
Mr. Berger,
I am listening to President Obama say that 5 states with minimum wage increases on the ballot approved them.
I shan’t bother you with the story of Initiative and Referendum in this country. More than a century ago it was a favorite of the Progressive movement. The double helix, the DNA, the warp and the woof of modern American Liberalism, is a straight line from when Woodrow Wilson ran for Governor of New Jersey. I can’t mention Wilson without recalling that Justice Marshall called him the most bigoted and the most racist President of the 20th century. Specifically, bigoted toward Jews and racist to what were then called Colored people.
President Obama says the vox populi on the minimum wage from 5 states can be used as proof of the soundness of the proposal and why it should be become the law. It is interesting to note that wherever same sex marriage has appeared on a ballot, including Florida and California, it has been overwhelmingly defeated.
Who gets to pick which vox populi is the good one, the one that all modern American Liberals can eclectically support? Would not Logic dictate, and here you can fill in the blanks, that the goose and the gander should sip from the same trough?
I know that mALs have 24 hour chiropractors on speed dial. 4 sided triangles, squared circles, political flummery with all its attendant reversals and soul emptying sellouts are Hell on the vertebrae, both lumbar and thoracic.
I appeal to you in a sort of local hands across the aisle for you to tell me how the ukases and fiats that modern American Liberalism imposes on its votaries are assembled and then dissembled and, when their usefulness is gone, how they get sent down the memory hole.
Hope to hear from you before it gets warm[er] again.
Kevin Smith
Thursday, October 30, 2014
October 24, 2014
Suzan Glickman
The Sun Sentinel
500 E. Broward Blvd #900
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33394
RE: The correlation between changing climate and Sophistry as put forward by you in your “The sky is falling” op-ed in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel.
Ms Glickman,
“I know that my redeemer liveth”
Thank you
A pre-dawn m ncacophony of tautologies, non sequiturs, wing-nut moon bat folderol, Mammon and filthy lucre, and for a classic modern American Liberal ending. “It’s for the children”. Barf bag alert.
First, I must thank you for the ice water dunking from you, an ohmadahn who, doubtless, thinks manual labor, the undocumented border crossing dreamer, someone who in times primeval was known as an illegal alien, is the dude who mows the lawn and trims the hedges of your aggressively air conditioned house.
Did I go one assumption too far in my description of you? I don’t think so. I used your op-ed as the paradigm for my unfair and unbalanced tract.
If I read your screed correctly you have knowledge of bribery involving lobbyists and elected officials and regulators. You must bring these suspicions immediately to the nearest United States Attorney’s office. It is your civic duty and responsibility.
Since I am not sure if you object to all money being spent on lobbying I must tell you that NARAL spends millions of dollars trying to influence legislators. Ditto various teachers’ unions, dog track owners, hospitals, cement haulers, anti-bullying cabals, librarians, and swamp defenders. Of course, if you operate under the rule that while all money in politics is evil some money in politics is more evil than other moneys in politics then your high dudgeon is limited to bad guys only.
Sometimes it’s tough to know who the bad guys are.
You say that since Governor Scott “has investments in more than two dozen oil and gas ventures” he is beholden, probably criminally, to the fossil fuel despoilers who have raised loot and pillage to a new art form.
I don’t know this to be true but if you have a bag filled with goodies covering this you must call Eric Holder collect and demand immediate action. Since he is not investigating 4 Americans being murdered in Benghazi or the IRS taking a dump on the Constitution his crack A-Team has some free time.
Meanwhile, Logic would dictate that you immediately beginning lobbying for every pension plan in Florida, each and every one, to begin divesting themselves of any company involved in any part of the fossil fuel business.
That should make you feel warm and fuzzy right away.
As a substitute I can find you some deeply discounted Solyndra bonds to help you when you enter your golden years.
As to Climate Change…
1900, 1925, 1935, 1938 gave us hurricanes that have not been equaled in this country since then. Since these all happened before gas guzzling, ice berg melting, polar bear drowning SUVs appeared can you tell me how this happened? Please limit yourself to declarative sentences.
The 1930s gave us a drought in the mid-West that was of biblical proportions. Where did that come from since the “usual suspects”, carbon footprints, plastic, the Koch Brothers, inter alia, had not yet appeared on the public stage?
Krakatoa in 1883. Repeated snow falls in Boston in the summer of 1821. I think we can rule out fracking as a suspect since the word would have sounded like it came from Avernus. How did they happen?
I’ll try to be gentle. The last Ice Age ended because of the blessings of Global Warming. Honest. You could look it up.
That is one of the reasons I wear a ball cap saying
PROUD GLOBAL WARMER.
The 1821 summer of snow in Boston, Krakatoa in 1883. Do you think “fracking” caused them?
“He [Governor Scott] might not be a scientist but he should listen to them.”
What you are really saying is that some really, really smart people, having made appropriate sacrifices to the proper Gods, have “settled the science” and spoken ex cathedra on the subject of climate change. As such, further discussion of the subject is fruitless and prima facie proof of bible toting, knuckle dragging oafs. Not only are they wrong but they are evil incarnate and must be driven from the public arena like the Salem Witches.
To that I say bullshit.
You do a great dishonor to your “for the children” crusade.
For 25 centuries Western man has died to keep its legacy intact. Part of said legacy is the scientific method, critical inquiry, and reasoned discourse.
In “Lawrence of Arabia” Peter O’Toole, of late and happy memory, defiantly snarls that “nothing is written until it is written”.
You say that –A- there is nothing more to be written and –B-the books are closed and –C- everybody must turn in their pencils so they may be used for fuel when the other books are burned..
No so.
Ptolemy, and deo gratias for Google, ruled the “settled science” of astronomy for a millennium and a half. 1,500 years. Somebody said “but still it moves” and he was gone in an instant.
If Miami is about to disappear under 30 fathoms of melting ice bergs – I am sorry for the peripatetic polar bears. Perhaps an infomercial asking for $19 a month will help them relocate. Perhaps $38 a month will get them to stop eating baby seals and adopt a vegan life style – why did an acre of waterfront property on Biscayne Bay just change hands for $100,000,000? That’s one hundred million dollars. The 1% may be mean, nasty, brutish, and insensitive to the community’s greater needs but that doesn’t make them stupid. Wealthy people surround themselves with smart people whose sole job is to keep them wealthy. Letting a polluting hedge fund Robber Baron lose $100, 000, 000 is not the way to increase their undertaxed bonuses.
Alas, duty calls.
Wearing my PROUD GLOBAL WARMER hat, tilted at a jaunty angle that scrams “Why are there more horses’ asses than horses’ heads?”, I am off to check my manatee traps. The baby sows make for great sushi, particularly with some lightly braised arugula, endive, chard, and kale. You won’t notice how hot and sticky the weather is.
I say that because, and I almost hate to be the one to tell you, but when you turn your A/C to the “Who says you can’t wear cashmere in Broward” setting the power coming out of the wire comes from burning dirty coal. Not quite half of the electricity produced in this country comes from power plants that burn coal. Half of that power goes to A/C. Modern American Liberals, particularly the loony ones who caterwaul about the need to think globally and act locally are not amused when this inconvenient truth is revealed to them.
Now that you know that you have no choice but to turn off you’re A/C.
You will, won’t you?
If not, why not?
After all, “It’s for the children”, isn’t it?
Kevin Smith
PS – If I were to say “Good! Like Nedick’s” would it date me? Are you related to Marty Glickman?
Suzan Glickman
The Sun Sentinel
500 E. Broward Blvd #900
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33394
RE: The correlation between changing climate and Sophistry as put forward by you in your “The sky is falling” op-ed in today’s unlinkable Sun Sentinel.
Ms Glickman,
“I know that my redeemer liveth”
Thank you
A pre-dawn m ncacophony of tautologies, non sequiturs, wing-nut moon bat folderol, Mammon and filthy lucre, and for a classic modern American Liberal ending. “It’s for the children”. Barf bag alert.
First, I must thank you for the ice water dunking from you, an ohmadahn who, doubtless, thinks manual labor, the undocumented border crossing dreamer, someone who in times primeval was known as an illegal alien, is the dude who mows the lawn and trims the hedges of your aggressively air conditioned house.
Did I go one assumption too far in my description of you? I don’t think so. I used your op-ed as the paradigm for my unfair and unbalanced tract.
If I read your screed correctly you have knowledge of bribery involving lobbyists and elected officials and regulators. You must bring these suspicions immediately to the nearest United States Attorney’s office. It is your civic duty and responsibility.
Since I am not sure if you object to all money being spent on lobbying I must tell you that NARAL spends millions of dollars trying to influence legislators. Ditto various teachers’ unions, dog track owners, hospitals, cement haulers, anti-bullying cabals, librarians, and swamp defenders. Of course, if you operate under the rule that while all money in politics is evil some money in politics is more evil than other moneys in politics then your high dudgeon is limited to bad guys only.
Sometimes it’s tough to know who the bad guys are.
You say that since Governor Scott “has investments in more than two dozen oil and gas ventures” he is beholden, probably criminally, to the fossil fuel despoilers who have raised loot and pillage to a new art form.
I don’t know this to be true but if you have a bag filled with goodies covering this you must call Eric Holder collect and demand immediate action. Since he is not investigating 4 Americans being murdered in Benghazi or the IRS taking a dump on the Constitution his crack A-Team has some free time.
Meanwhile, Logic would dictate that you immediately beginning lobbying for every pension plan in Florida, each and every one, to begin divesting themselves of any company involved in any part of the fossil fuel business.
That should make you feel warm and fuzzy right away.
As a substitute I can find you some deeply discounted Solyndra bonds to help you when you enter your golden years.
As to Climate Change…
1900, 1925, 1935, 1938 gave us hurricanes that have not been equaled in this country since then. Since these all happened before gas guzzling, ice berg melting, polar bear drowning SUVs appeared can you tell me how this happened? Please limit yourself to declarative sentences.
The 1930s gave us a drought in the mid-West that was of biblical proportions. Where did that come from since the “usual suspects”, carbon footprints, plastic, the Koch Brothers, inter alia, had not yet appeared on the public stage?
Krakatoa in 1883. Repeated snow falls in Boston in the summer of 1821. I think we can rule out fracking as a suspect since the word would have sounded like it came from Avernus. How did they happen?
I’ll try to be gentle. The last Ice Age ended because of the blessings of Global Warming. Honest. You could look it up.
That is one of the reasons I wear a ball cap saying
PROUD GLOBAL WARMER.
The 1821 summer of snow in Boston, Krakatoa in 1883. Do you think “fracking” caused them?
“He [Governor Scott] might not be a scientist but he should listen to them.”
What you are really saying is that some really, really smart people, having made appropriate sacrifices to the proper Gods, have “settled the science” and spoken ex cathedra on the subject of climate change. As such, further discussion of the subject is fruitless and prima facie proof of bible toting, knuckle dragging oafs. Not only are they wrong but they are evil incarnate and must be driven from the public arena like the Salem Witches.
To that I say bullshit.
You do a great dishonor to your “for the children” crusade.
For 25 centuries Western man has died to keep its legacy intact. Part of said legacy is the scientific method, critical inquiry, and reasoned discourse.
In “Lawrence of Arabia” Peter O’Toole, of late and happy memory, defiantly snarls that “nothing is written until it is written”.
You say that –A- there is nothing more to be written and –B-the books are closed and –C- everybody must turn in their pencils so they may be used for fuel when the other books are burned..
No so.
Ptolemy, and deo gratias for Google, ruled the “settled science” of astronomy for a millennium and a half. 1,500 years. Somebody said “but still it moves” and he was gone in an instant.
If Miami is about to disappear under 30 fathoms of melting ice bergs – I am sorry for the peripatetic polar bears. Perhaps an infomercial asking for $19 a month will help them relocate. Perhaps $38 a month will get them to stop eating baby seals and adopt a vegan life style – why did an acre of waterfront property on Biscayne Bay just change hands for $100,000,000? That’s one hundred million dollars. The 1% may be mean, nasty, brutish, and insensitive to the community’s greater needs but that doesn’t make them stupid. Wealthy people surround themselves with smart people whose sole job is to keep them wealthy. Letting a polluting hedge fund Robber Baron lose $100, 000, 000 is not the way to increase their undertaxed bonuses.
Alas, duty calls.
Wearing my PROUD GLOBAL WARMER hat, tilted at a jaunty angle that scrams “Why are there more horses’ asses than horses’ heads?”, I am off to check my manatee traps. The baby sows make for great sushi, particularly with some lightly braised arugula, endive, chard, and kale. You won’t notice how hot and sticky the weather is.
I say that because, and I almost hate to be the one to tell you, but when you turn your A/C to the “Who says you can’t wear cashmere in Broward” setting the power coming out of the wire comes from burning dirty coal. Not quite half of the electricity produced in this country comes from power plants that burn coal. Half of that power goes to A/C. Modern American Liberals, particularly the loony ones who caterwaul about the need to think globally and act locally are not amused when this inconvenient truth is revealed to them.
Now that you know that you have no choice but to turn off you’re A/C.
You will, won’t you?
If not, why not?
After all, “It’s for the children”, isn’t it?
Kevin Smith
PS – If I were to say “Good! Like Nedick’s” would it date me? Are you related to Marty Glickman?
Tuesday, October 21, 2014
October 19, 2014
Mayor Annise Parker
PO Box 1562
Houston, TX 77251
RE: “Will no one rid me of this troublesome priest?”– That’s a Historical reference that is usually lost on modern American Liberal elected officials who are so smart they’re dumb as in couldn’t find their ass using both hands. SASE.
Ms. Mayor,
First, let me congratulate you for putting your mouth where your money is – Did I get that ass backwards? No matter – in the fight for population control. Who knows who is breeding, right? The last time I looked you and your spouse, a person who will not have to worry about prostate problems, try as you might with the ancient arts of rug munching and dildo G-spotting, will not burden the polar bear drowning environment with more rug rats.
Good for you.
We are better off emptying some gene pools. You may wish to consult Margaret Sanger and the Nuremberg Race Laws.
But then we get to the subpoenas.
The subpoenas commanded pastors to produce everything involving their sermons and their speeches about certain practices that certain religions – not theirs – disapprove. There are religions that preach that the practitioners of same should die in a rather specific manner. I’ll get to that in a bit.
I could hector you with “Congress shall make no law….” I could tell what one of the original DWEMs said 25 centuries ago – “Free men speak with free tongues” – but I won’t.
I will probably be in Houston in a few months. As much as I would like to tell you where I might be I shan’t. The prospect of having some Brown-shirted, badge wearing, gun toting Fascist wanabees showing up at my host’s house is not acceptable. I have had police; men with badges, men with guns, men with the full majesty of the Law come to my house 3 times because of something I wrote to or about elected officials.
The thread connecting these 3 separate incidents is that the 3 elected officials I wrote to or about were all Democrats. Specifically they were all card carrying, fire breathing modern American Liberals, as if there could possibly be any other kind. And here’s another strange coincidence.
They were all broads. Not a scrotum among them. Toilet seats turned perpetually up. All games ending in scoreless ties but who’s keeping score?
I have been awarding public officials, the first being the tooth picking, perpetually calorically challenged New Jersey Superior Court Judge Carole Ferentz, in 1992, 3 highly prized, greatly respected, world renowned laurels. [If I am to believe the flying squad of the emergency carpentry department of the Newark Courthouse her ass was an axe handle and a half wide]
Let me skip the foreplay,
HORSE’S ASS OFF THE WEEK
POMPOUS FART OF THE MONTH
SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR
Congratulations! A hat trick! And your first time at the plate, too. It must be like Alexander felt when he realized that there was nothing left to conquer. You give PMS overloaded nags a bad name.
Wear your laurels proudly. You got them the old fashioned way. No chick set aside for you.
You earned them.
Kevin Smith
PS – You may want to subpoena a few Imams. Whether they be Sunni or Shia is irrelevant. They agree on one thing. Homosexuality – male and/or female – is an abomination punishable by death. Not the needle or the noose but a tried and true method: stoning. The Koran, and see if your Cossack cops can find out why it is always sacred, have some strict protocol rules. The stones can’t be too big lest the stonee die too quickly. They can’t be too small lest the cathartic community cleansing takes too long. It is oft-times discussed at Friday services. Get to the bottom of this before the Word Police ban bacon.
Mayor Annise Parker
PO Box 1562
Houston, TX 77251
RE: “Will no one rid me of this troublesome priest?”– That’s a Historical reference that is usually lost on modern American Liberal elected officials who are so smart they’re dumb as in couldn’t find their ass using both hands. SASE.
Ms. Mayor,
First, let me congratulate you for putting your mouth where your money is – Did I get that ass backwards? No matter – in the fight for population control. Who knows who is breeding, right? The last time I looked you and your spouse, a person who will not have to worry about prostate problems, try as you might with the ancient arts of rug munching and dildo G-spotting, will not burden the polar bear drowning environment with more rug rats.
Good for you.
We are better off emptying some gene pools. You may wish to consult Margaret Sanger and the Nuremberg Race Laws.
But then we get to the subpoenas.
The subpoenas commanded pastors to produce everything involving their sermons and their speeches about certain practices that certain religions – not theirs – disapprove. There are religions that preach that the practitioners of same should die in a rather specific manner. I’ll get to that in a bit.
I could hector you with “Congress shall make no law….” I could tell what one of the original DWEMs said 25 centuries ago – “Free men speak with free tongues” – but I won’t.
I will probably be in Houston in a few months. As much as I would like to tell you where I might be I shan’t. The prospect of having some Brown-shirted, badge wearing, gun toting Fascist wanabees showing up at my host’s house is not acceptable. I have had police; men with badges, men with guns, men with the full majesty of the Law come to my house 3 times because of something I wrote to or about elected officials.
The thread connecting these 3 separate incidents is that the 3 elected officials I wrote to or about were all Democrats. Specifically they were all card carrying, fire breathing modern American Liberals, as if there could possibly be any other kind. And here’s another strange coincidence.
They were all broads. Not a scrotum among them. Toilet seats turned perpetually up. All games ending in scoreless ties but who’s keeping score?
I have been awarding public officials, the first being the tooth picking, perpetually calorically challenged New Jersey Superior Court Judge Carole Ferentz, in 1992, 3 highly prized, greatly respected, world renowned laurels. [If I am to believe the flying squad of the emergency carpentry department of the Newark Courthouse her ass was an axe handle and a half wide]
Let me skip the foreplay,
HORSE’S ASS OFF THE WEEK
POMPOUS FART OF THE MONTH
SMARMY BASTARD OF THE YEAR
Congratulations! A hat trick! And your first time at the plate, too. It must be like Alexander felt when he realized that there was nothing left to conquer. You give PMS overloaded nags a bad name.
Wear your laurels proudly. You got them the old fashioned way. No chick set aside for you.
You earned them.
Kevin Smith
PS – You may want to subpoena a few Imams. Whether they be Sunni or Shia is irrelevant. They agree on one thing. Homosexuality – male and/or female – is an abomination punishable by death. Not the needle or the noose but a tried and true method: stoning. The Koran, and see if your Cossack cops can find out why it is always sacred, have some strict protocol rules. The stones can’t be too big lest the stonee die too quickly. They can’t be too small lest the cathartic community cleansing takes too long. It is oft-times discussed at Friday services. Get to the bottom of this before the Word Police ban bacon.
Thursday, October 9, 2014
October 7, 2014
Mitchell Berger, Esq
350 E. Las Olas Blvd #1000
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: Happy birthday!
Mr. Berger,
Sunday last, the Sun Sentinel, a newspaper not quite dedicated enough to the noble cause of undrowning polar bears to turn off all of its A/Cs, wrote that the most powerful hurricane to strike the United States happened in 1935. It also told us that 3,100 people died in a hurricane that struck Cuba in 1931.
That they both happened in a decade that was not afflicted with the twin boogey men of Global Warming and/or Global Cooling is, at once, worthy of note and proof of nothing. Please note that while I am sorely tempted to surrender to the siren calls of tautologies and circular reasoning I will avoid them the way that baloney avoids the grinder.
It is important, indeed it is owed to the ledger, to note that the 1930s – [“a low, dishonest decade”, if we are to believe Auden] was a decade where modern American Liberals were enamored of Mussolini and enthralled by the eugenics and “herd culling” of Margaret Sanger. It must be noted, like a big old turd popping up in the punch bowl, that Hitler was also.
Among other things of note in the 1930s…
The Democrats at both ends of Pennsylvania Avenue conspired to pass the Davis-Bacon Act, the most anti-Black Federal legislation of the 20th century.
In 1936, Poppa Joe Kennedy, and if America has to have a Corsair class why not him as its paradigmatic template, created a trust for his youngest son. Even then he knew that Young Lard would never be able to provide for himself. It has passed unopened and unaudited to his children. Talk about the 1% taking care of their own.
Would it be impolitic of me to point out that some of the dedicated modern American Liberals in the Democratic Party, ‘liberals in a hurry”, people who had no God but Stalin, were busily preparing to betray their country? I’ll take that risk.
One of the forgotten lessons of the History of the 1930s is that by any measurable standard the economy was worse in 1939 than it was in 1933. Honest. Look it up.
All hail “shovel ready jobs” and the never ending “Summer of Recovery”. Everything old is new again.
The purpose of the above is to set the tone for a gathering of this century’s edition of “The Sons of Liberty” in a well-known public house to celebrate my birthday. It is more than a coincidence that it also celebrates the defeat of the bad guys – feral Muslim thugs – by the good guys – fierce defenders of Western Civilization – at Lepanto. Red meat, red wine, and brown whisky will be consumed in copious amounts.
Crab grass consommé, endive and groats confit, and tofu flambé are expressly forbidden. The same for all light beer. Anyone daring to complain about the wonders of fracking will be turned over to the tender mercies of the resident Master of Bastinado for intense sensitivity training.
There is a possibility that some contrabundo cigaros will be destroyed by fire, one by one, in an environmentally sensitive manner
I am bound for Texas to see my ladies. It is good to bathe from time to time in the invigorating waters found in Koch Brothers country. When I return I shall take up the cudgels with renewed vigor. Modern American Liberals, particularly those in the public arena, deserve to be struck regularly, like gongs.
Having recently disposed of the last of my extensive cashmere collection I am in no need of material things for my birthday. I ask one thing that you and you alone can give.
Please, please get rid of that big, gas guzzling, furbish lousewort destroying car you drive. The only vehicles that get worse gas mileage are launched from a Nimitz class aircraft carrier.
I leave you with 2 thoughts from Jefferson. That’s Jefferson from Virginia, not Jefferson the dry cleaner.
“A free people claim their rights from the laws of Nature
and Nature’s God, and not as a gift from the chief magistrate.”
“In questions of power, then, let no more be heard of confidence
man, but let him be bound down from mischief by the chains of
The Constitution.”
From a proud Global Warmer
KS
PS – Your firm has stopped handling all real estate transactions involving waterfront property because of rising sea levels. Congratulations.
Mitchell Berger, Esq
350 E. Las Olas Blvd #1000
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301
RE: Happy birthday!
Mr. Berger,
Sunday last, the Sun Sentinel, a newspaper not quite dedicated enough to the noble cause of undrowning polar bears to turn off all of its A/Cs, wrote that the most powerful hurricane to strike the United States happened in 1935. It also told us that 3,100 people died in a hurricane that struck Cuba in 1931.
That they both happened in a decade that was not afflicted with the twin boogey men of Global Warming and/or Global Cooling is, at once, worthy of note and proof of nothing. Please note that while I am sorely tempted to surrender to the siren calls of tautologies and circular reasoning I will avoid them the way that baloney avoids the grinder.
It is important, indeed it is owed to the ledger, to note that the 1930s – [“a low, dishonest decade”, if we are to believe Auden] was a decade where modern American Liberals were enamored of Mussolini and enthralled by the eugenics and “herd culling” of Margaret Sanger. It must be noted, like a big old turd popping up in the punch bowl, that Hitler was also.
Among other things of note in the 1930s…
The Democrats at both ends of Pennsylvania Avenue conspired to pass the Davis-Bacon Act, the most anti-Black Federal legislation of the 20th century.
In 1936, Poppa Joe Kennedy, and if America has to have a Corsair class why not him as its paradigmatic template, created a trust for his youngest son. Even then he knew that Young Lard would never be able to provide for himself. It has passed unopened and unaudited to his children. Talk about the 1% taking care of their own.
Would it be impolitic of me to point out that some of the dedicated modern American Liberals in the Democratic Party, ‘liberals in a hurry”, people who had no God but Stalin, were busily preparing to betray their country? I’ll take that risk.
One of the forgotten lessons of the History of the 1930s is that by any measurable standard the economy was worse in 1939 than it was in 1933. Honest. Look it up.
All hail “shovel ready jobs” and the never ending “Summer of Recovery”. Everything old is new again.
The purpose of the above is to set the tone for a gathering of this century’s edition of “The Sons of Liberty” in a well-known public house to celebrate my birthday. It is more than a coincidence that it also celebrates the defeat of the bad guys – feral Muslim thugs – by the good guys – fierce defenders of Western Civilization – at Lepanto. Red meat, red wine, and brown whisky will be consumed in copious amounts.
Crab grass consommé, endive and groats confit, and tofu flambé are expressly forbidden. The same for all light beer. Anyone daring to complain about the wonders of fracking will be turned over to the tender mercies of the resident Master of Bastinado for intense sensitivity training.
There is a possibility that some contrabundo cigaros will be destroyed by fire, one by one, in an environmentally sensitive manner
I am bound for Texas to see my ladies. It is good to bathe from time to time in the invigorating waters found in Koch Brothers country. When I return I shall take up the cudgels with renewed vigor. Modern American Liberals, particularly those in the public arena, deserve to be struck regularly, like gongs.
Having recently disposed of the last of my extensive cashmere collection I am in no need of material things for my birthday. I ask one thing that you and you alone can give.
Please, please get rid of that big, gas guzzling, furbish lousewort destroying car you drive. The only vehicles that get worse gas mileage are launched from a Nimitz class aircraft carrier.
I leave you with 2 thoughts from Jefferson. That’s Jefferson from Virginia, not Jefferson the dry cleaner.
“A free people claim their rights from the laws of Nature
and Nature’s God, and not as a gift from the chief magistrate.”
“In questions of power, then, let no more be heard of confidence
man, but let him be bound down from mischief by the chains of
The Constitution.”
From a proud Global Warmer
KS
PS – Your firm has stopped handling all real estate transactions involving waterfront property because of rising sea levels. Congratulations.
Friday, October 3, 2014
October 2, 2014
Joseph J. Casey, MD
Bienes Cancer Center
4725 N. Federal Highway
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33308
RE: “A Modest Proposal”, immodestly made.
Dr. Casey,
On Tuesday next – the 7th – I will be one up on my biblically allotted 3 score and 10. If I were a betting man, and considering my last 6 years at Holy Cross, I would take the under on myself.
Since I am now playing with house money I propose to lay down a marker.
I would like to be the Holy Cross Face of Breast Cancer.
One of my favorite authors, one most quotable, said, “Focus on the absurd lest reality drive you mad”.
My qualifications are simple.
#1 – I have been diagnosed with, am being treated for, and will be operated on for breast cancer.
#2 – I love pink. [I once had several women fighting over my pink, V-neck, cashmere sweater. Honest. Affidavits on request.]
#3 – Should there be any underemployed breast cancer medical personnel at Holy Cross, I will, by force of personality, have them all on overtime before All Saints’/All Souls’ Days. [It is a Catholic Hospital, isn’t it?]
Who knows? Maybe I can save a life.
KS
PS – Tuesday 10/7/14 – Waxy O’Connor’s 17th Street Causeway – Noon on – Several of your lanschmen have indicated that they may be there – Adult beverages will be available
Joseph J. Casey, MD
Bienes Cancer Center
4725 N. Federal Highway
Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33308
RE: “A Modest Proposal”, immodestly made.
Dr. Casey,
On Tuesday next – the 7th – I will be one up on my biblically allotted 3 score and 10. If I were a betting man, and considering my last 6 years at Holy Cross, I would take the under on myself.
Since I am now playing with house money I propose to lay down a marker.
I would like to be the Holy Cross Face of Breast Cancer.
One of my favorite authors, one most quotable, said, “Focus on the absurd lest reality drive you mad”.
My qualifications are simple.
#1 – I have been diagnosed with, am being treated for, and will be operated on for breast cancer.
#2 – I love pink. [I once had several women fighting over my pink, V-neck, cashmere sweater. Honest. Affidavits on request.]
#3 – Should there be any underemployed breast cancer medical personnel at Holy Cross, I will, by force of personality, have them all on overtime before All Saints’/All Souls’ Days. [It is a Catholic Hospital, isn’t it?]
Who knows? Maybe I can save a life.
KS
PS – Tuesday 10/7/14 – Waxy O’Connor’s 17th Street Causeway – Noon on – Several of your lanschmen have indicated that they may be there – Adult beverages will be available
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